The Business Expert: The 3 Worst Financial Habits That Keep You Poor! w/ Dean Graziosi

Dean Graziosi
It all boils down to money. I don't care what anybody says. You have the money. You're in control of your decisions. You're in control of your calendar.

But I want to tell you, for me, the biggest game changer is the day the hand came off my throat. Of money real estate guru, king of the infomercial, a best selling author and heat performance expert. Today we're here with the wonderful Dean Graziosi. Dean Graziosi. Dean Graziosi in the house.

My man. You have a deep belief that people with money are greedy. You will be so conflicted it'll never work. It'll be a self fulfilling prophecy. Because every time you see a glimpse of success, you'll self sabotage.

Because if you get money, then you're a greedy, capitalist bastard. How would you feel knowing that you're not leaving entitled children, but no matter where the world goes, your children are going to be safe? Yeah. What is that? On a scale of one to ten, what is that?

Lewis Howes
Ten. It's 200, right? Yeah. Yeah. And we lived in a trailer park for three years and we got evicted from that trailer park.

Dean Graziosi
And she tried. I could get emotional. I haven't. That's why I love interviewing with you. You make me.

Because I care about you so much. I want to go back to feelings. I feel like the stuff you shared today, I've never heard you share. I haven't. This is not on any other place, anywhere.

Lewis Howes
I know. What would you say are the three biggest money lessons you've learned from Tony Robbins in being his business partner, one of his close friends? What are three lessons you've learned from him? I've never been asked this question before. I've never shared this answer.

Dean Graziosi
I would say.

Lewis Howes
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Lewis Howes
Welcome back everyone, to the school of greatness. Very excited about our guests. We have my dear friend Dean Graziosi in the house. Good to see you. Good to see you, man.

Dean Graziosi
Good to see you. Welcome back. Oh man, I'm so glad you're here because you have been leading in the entrepreneurial money mindset space for probably two, two and a half decades. You've been in multiple different industries, from real estate to online education to coaching and a lot of different things that you've done. And you coach a lot of top leaders.

Lewis Howes
A lot of people don't know this about you, that you are the one texting me and other people in the industry who are trying to figure out how to get their business or brand to the next level in an authentic, organic and aligned way, what's true and authentic to them. So I'm excited that you're here. And one of the things that I think a lot of people are struggling with lately is money trauma and money wounds. And I wanted to ask you about this because you're the guy who wrote the book about the mindset of millionaires, the success habits of millionaires. And I'm curious, did you ever have any money wounds or memories that cause you to be anxious or avoidant or scarce around money in maybe your early twenties from childhood?

And if so, what were those kind of money wounds that made you driven to succeed financially? And were you ever able to overcome the money wounds or traumas around money, the ideas around money that maybe made you feel anxious or feel like I'm not enough if I don't have more money? Did you ever have any of that happen for you. Yeah, you know, great. Great question.

Dean Graziosi
First off, it's always great to be back with you, man. I appreciate. I love watching what you're doing. I love the impact you're making. We don't get a chance to see each other as much as I'd like, but I'm always cheering you on.

Lewis Howes
Thank you. Because I'm watching your innovation. I'm watching your growth as a man. I'm watching the impact that you're making. And by you working on you so much, you might not realize how it transcends to the people watching.

Dean Graziosi
Like, I feel different watching you this year than last year. And I loved last year, and I loved five years ago. I just told my daughter, the first one I did was with my daughter. She's gonna be 18. I remember.

Lewis Howes
I remember she's gonna be 18. She was. She was, like, twelve or 13 when she gave me. Yeah, she's gonna be 18. Money wounds.

Dean Graziosi
You know what I'd love, because I really want to specify this, and I want to answer this question right. You get the opportunity to see so many comments that come back, especially around money. When you say a money wound, maybe an example of one you've had or you think some of your followers, some of your tribe might have. I have my own, and I'm gonna share, but I'd love even more detail on that, I guess. You know, when people.

Lewis Howes
When I think about money wounds, it's kind of like, how did you grow up? I remember growing up not knowing what money meant and feeling like we didn't have enough at certain stages, and so I felt like, okay, I'm confused about money. I don't understand money. I don't know where it comes from. I don't have the skill sets to make money.

How do I even manage it when I have it? How do I not blow it? All these different things. And I used to have kind of an anxiety around money. Yeah, I get it.

I didn't feel like I had enough. I agree totally. Like, there was a time I said, imagine if you and money, like, you were at a therapist, and I said this on stage just randomly once. So it just triggered. You're at a therapist.

Dean Graziosi
Your therapist is in the middle. Money is on one couch, and you're on the other, and your conversation is, I don't want to need you. I don't want to be obsessed with you. I don't want to be greedy by having you. I don't want to feel like I'm being a big shot by having you.

But I want to live into my full potential. I want to be a better parent. I want to contribute more to this cause that I have. You know, I heard somebody say once, people who say money doesn't solve problems means they haven't given enough away, right? Or they have.

Money's not happiness. It's like you haven't given enough away. So you have this. Could you imagine a therapist say, wait a minute. You're saying you don't want, you want to break up, you don't want to be connected, you don't want to have an association, but you want all the things that the money's byproducts bring.

Lewis Howes
Cause what is it that people really want when they say they want? They don't want the money, but they want what? The byproduct, right? I mean, you asked me my money wounds. All I know is my wounds were probably a little different.

Dean Graziosi
I was driven to want to make more money, and I had one sole purpose, to take care of my mother. That was my whole sole purpose. My parents split when I was three. My mother had made a string of bad marriages. My mother was married five times.

She is the sweetest woman you will ever meet in your life. Just made bad decision with men. And every time, it was horrific. And every time she'd work three jobs, she'd cut hair, paint houses, clean houses, do whatever it took to just. She'd come home at 09:00 at night with her hands tired.

My sister and I, when we were eight and twelve, were doing the laundry, making dinner. Not poor us. Like, we couldn't wait to do it for her because she'd come home and we lived in a trailer park for three years, and we got evicted from that trailer park. And she tried. I could get emotional.

That's why I love interviewing with you. You make me, because I care about you so much. I want to go back to feelings. But I remember this poor woman. I remember she had a 1972.

That's how old I am, Chevy Impala. And the back window got knocked out, and she couldn't replace it for like a year, you know? And, you know, it's like you grew up in Ohio, grew up in upstate New York going to school. It was freezing. There was a piece of plastic that was flopping, right?

But my whole point is, my whole emotion around money was, I need to make it to retire that woman. Like, if I think back, my earliest thing, I didn't understand where money came from. I didn't understand how to make it. I didn't understand the value. I just knew I had to do something different.

My father struggled financially. My mother was struggling financially, and I did become obsessed with generating more money. But there was a. I retired my mom when I was 24 years old. I've been giving her a check.

She's going to be 80 this year. I've been giving her a check every week since I was 24 years old, my dad since I was 27. Right. And so what I'd say around money is we are in this weird time in history. I think we can agree it doesn't matter what side of the political arena, life arena you're on.

It's like if, in today's world, hard for people to have conversations that don't agree. Right. And money sometimes gets tossed in the middle. Right. Capitalism is bad.

Making money is bad when simultaneously, it's the thing that cures hunger, it cures illness, it cures disease, it helps religions, it helps you retire your parents, it helps you put money away for your children. So someday, I don't know where the world's gonna go. I hope you have children someday. It's a goal of mine. The day you have a child, I'm gonna.

I hope I'm one of the first people you call if you decide to do it, because you are gonna be the most amazing father. I mean that with all of my heart. I'm on four. If it's up to my wife, we'll probably have another. Right.

So. But how would you feel, no matter what money meant to you at one point in your life, how would you feel knowing that you're not leaving entitled children, but no matter where the world goes, your children are gonna be safe? Yeah. What is that on a scale of one to ten, what is that? Ten.

It's a 200, right? Yeah. Yeah. Right. Helping out family members.

I think. I hope I was clear to say, don't look at money for money's sake. That it's just capitalism, it's just greed. I just want the extra car or the $200,000. Watch your audience.

You watching. If you watch Lewis Howes, that's not who you are, but money's byproduct. Oh, my God. And I want to share something that I did not see coming. Money did something different for me than anything I've ever imagined.

Yes, I retired my parents. Yes, I feel like my kids are going to be safe no matter what. Yes, I get to do things. I provide about 25 million meals. So far, through feeding America, we've saved children from slavery.

We've built churches and schools in Africa. We've done. We do stuff all the time. We just did something amazing last week out of the blue, right. We get to do those cool things.

I get to employ hundreds of people, right, who have kids and families and all that stuff. So all those things have a positive impact on the world. But I'll tell you the one thing, when you don't have money, you don't realize, like, think about right now. If someone grabbed your throat and squeezed it, what would you think about? The only thing in the world is oxygen.

Lewis Howes
Yeah. How do I get more in? Didn't free. Right. But you're not thinking about it right now because it's abundant.

Dean Graziosi
It's not on your mind. But what you don't realize is when money is lacking in your life, it focuses all the time. I would do that for my kids, but I can't. I'd love to take that vacation, but I can't. I'd love to do my own thing.

I'm sick of this unfulfilled job, but I can't. I'd love to be at every baseball game, but I can't. It all boils down to money. I don't care what anybody says. You have the money.

You're in control of your decisions. You're in control of your calendar. So I didn't realize. I spent so much of my life with the throat being choked. But it was money, and I watched.

That's how my parents lived. I can't go to the baseball game. I can't put the window in the back of the car. We gotta get evicted from this trail. We don't have what?

We don't have money. I'd love to say that we live in this perfect world, that you don't need money to make, have choices in your life, but in most cases, you don't. But I want to tell you, for me, the biggest game changer is the day the hand came off my throat of money. How old were you? I probably was early forties.

Cause I always worried about even though I was doing it, even though you're. Making it, you hadn't made it. But I still was leftover broke, kid. That somebody was gonna realize I wasn't that smart and take it all away from me. Felt that way my entire, like, what are they gonna figure out?

That I shouldn't belong in this room. Right? I probably still feel like that a little bit, just so you know. Yeah. Yeah.

But probably my early forties, late thirties. Probably early forties. The hand was off. I retired my parents. I had money away.

I was living a comfortable life. My companies were growing. And when I stopped, when I didn't have to worry, when I could travel where I wanted, pay where I want, donate what I want, eat the way I like, nothing was like, oh, I can't. Because something crazy happened. I realized that I had spent my whole life chasing money so hard to do all those things that I had avoided, all the craziness that went on in my childhood.

My parents married nine times, my dad extremely violent. All the things that I was like, well, screw. There was, you know, some crazy things. You were running away from, I was running away from. But, you know, I was running so hard that it was like I took this the way I would describe this.

I took all the things. The trauma that we all. You had it. You and I know your history very well, right? All that trauma.

I just tucked it in a box and I put a lock on it and said, gotta make money. Gotta make money, gotta make money. All of a sudden, my brain's like, hey, we're okay. And I feel like the frickin box, the lock popped off, and the only person in the mirror was me. I couldn't say, no, no, no.

I'm too busy to deal with you, Dean. I gotta go make money. It's like, no, you got the money, dude, shut up. Wow. You got me.

We gotta work on this. That was the biggest byproduct of my life. I went through a divorce in my forties. I became a better human in my forties. I met the love of my life.

In my late forties. All of that wow. Happened. I got goosebumps telling you that, because it's the truth. Like, I couldn't use that as an excuse.

Like, shut up. You don't need that anymore. And I wish that for everyone because there are a lot of people watching right now. When I shared the throat, like, holding the throat is. You don't realize that the lack of is not allowing you to live into the dad, the mom, the husband, the sister, the brother, the employee, the friend, the donator, the charitable person you want to be.

Imagine if that was gone. Who would you be? Do you think someone can feel emotionally free in life if they are not some level of financial freedom? Of course, some of the happiest people in the world have found that, right? And if that is your path, then amazing, right?

But I also live in the real world. There's about 3% of people that could, probably 5% that could meditate and love it. And I admire those people. I learn from those people. I love reading their books.

I love listening to their podcasts. They make me a better version of me. But then I get to the real world with four kids and a wife, and I want to travel, and I want to do things, and I want to impact others. I want to leave a legacy. I want to change the world.

I want to make this place better than I then I than I found it. All those things, in most cases, Louis, require money. I don't care what anybody says. If you think that's conflicting to your values, I'm sorry, but in most cases, that's a fact. Yeah.

Lewis Howes
Wow. So what would you say was the thing that unlocked for you to feel more emotionally free, even though you were already financially free and still feeling a little bit trapped? What was the thing that allowed you to unlock the peace along with the financial freedom? Because you had the money. You had the financial freedom.

You could charter private jets probably in your thirties. You had millions in the bank. You had big businesses. You were on tv every day. You had all these things, but you still felt like there was a clinch in your throat, even though you were financially free.

So what allowed you to switch into emotional peace with the financial freedom? Such a great question, Lewis. I think time, wisdom. Maybe it wasn't even wisdom yet. It was on its way to wisdom.

Dean Graziosi
Right? We're in this space. We're in the personal development space. You've interviewed more people than anyone on the planet that I know. How much have you learned from all of these interviews?

Where you go, wow, that's still in there. Like, I was still that broke kid running away from being small, running away from being broke, running away from lots of marriages, but I ran. It's like, I could have run 10 miles. I was on my 15th marathon. I look up, I'm 40 years old.

It's like, hey, isn't it time to slow down a little bit? And I think personal development, staying engaged. I listen to a podcast or a book on personal growth at least 20 days of every month. Still to this day, I have to stay plugged in. I have to stay engaged.

For me, that old version of me is still in there. And if I don't work on this version, it's like, if the. It'll take you back. It'll take me back, right? Maybe not at the level it once was.

So I would say just time. And then there was a point in my history where I remember thinking, hey, if I have the gift, true story. I had the opportunity to spend a couple hours with Richard Branson on his sailboat I raised, helped raise a million dollars for virgin unite. He invited us to go to his island. I thought he wasn't going to be there.

He was actually there. I get up super early. You and I have run super early in the morning. He was every 05:00 he was the only other one up. So he saw me one day, and he goes, hey, you want to sail tomorrow?

I'm like, hell, yeah. What time? So we sail around the island, and he said something to me. I asked him about this question. Now, this is probably 15 years ago.

So I was 40, 41. He said to me, I asked him about money. I probably asked him a similar question that you asked me. Maybe it's a time in life when you ask those things, right? I'm 41 right now.

Okay. Yeah, look at that. Save time. So here's what he said to me. He said, and we're doing an event, and he's going to be on the event, so it's good.

I'm glad I'm going to see him again. I haven't talked to him in ages, but I asked him a similar question. He said, you know, thank God for the people that could. Let's use an example of, and I'm going to paraphrase 15 years ago, but he said, thank God for the people that can go to a soup kitchen or a homeless shelter and serve food and make beds and give love. I love those people.

Thank God for that. He said, but we're all put on this earth. If you have the opportunity to make money like you do, then you can do your part. He goes, somebody needs the help. But how cool would it be if you could walk into that homeless shelter and hand him $100,000?

He goes, so if you have a God given talent to make the money, go get the best in the world at that. Give it away. Change the world. We still need the person that's pouring the soup. And if you still want to do that, you can.

But if you can cut the check, do it. I shifted how much money I give away and things I do in private from that day. Sure, sure. Because I'm like, if I can make it, I can help even more. So I think some of those things all stack together.

Personal development, every day, realizing the association with money, that money is a byproduct in my life. It has to be a byproduct that is ethically earned, right? If you're doing something unethical, you're selling. Drugs, it's like you're gonna be out of alignment. You're out of alignment.

But if you're doing something ethical, like what you do here, I'm like, I hope you make a gazillion dollars doing what you do. Cause you transform so many lives. If you're doing something impacts live and you can ethically earn by doing that. And then you do good with the money you earn. Yeah.

Then you should feel guilty not getting after it, not held back. Right. And maybe I'm a little jaded and I've been doing this a long time, but that's the way I feel. That's your thoughts. I'm curious if you were, you mentioned kind of money therapy, which I really like that.

Lewis Howes
Let's say you're the therapist, the money therapist, and people watching are sitting on their couch or listening wherever they're listening in the world, and they're in the hot seat for money therapy. And let's just say they come in your office for the first moment and they're in the metaphorical office right now and you get to ask them one, two or three questions to see and assess where they're at in their money relationship, their relationship to money, and if it's healthy or if it's not healthy. Not saying you have the answers on what they need to do afterwards, but for them to assess where their money relationship is. What would be a couple questions you would ask them so people could take a self assessment and see, oh, maybe this isn't serving me, this type of energy, this relationship I have to money. And maybe I need to take different actions and heal some of these money wounds that we're talking about.

Dean Graziosi
Yeah. Yeah. What would be a couple questions that you might ask on the spot here? I didn't prep Dean for the money therapy. Oh, this is great.

Lewis Howes
One of my favorite parts about my job is that I get the opportunity to travel a lot. And in fact, I'm recording this right now while I'm in Mexico. And actually I was thinking about something that I wanted to share because I get a lot of questions from so many people about different side hustle ideas. So here's one for those of you out there that are on the go a lot like I am or traveling a lot. When you're staying in your Airbnb on your trips, have you ever thought about how you could be making extra money by hosting through Airbnb while your home is vacant?

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Dean Graziosi
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Lewis Howes
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Dean Graziosi
Cause it's not my job to be politically correct. It's my job to help serve. If I'm gonna spend an hour with you, I want people to be impacted. Yes. I can only go back to my mom, who is one of the sweetest women in the world, worked really hard.

But my mom, in the situation she was in, I can remember growing up, and if we saw a business owner or we saw a woman in a Mercedes, my mom, probably on her third job with her window knocked out, with two kids, with an ex husband, my dad, who didn't give her any money. She didn't work on personal development. She didn't work on herself. She'd have the tools. She'd have the tools.

But we'd pass a woman in a Mercedes and she'd stop. And my mother would look over and go, pfft. Must be nice, right? Must be nice. Or they use the words lucky.

Or see a business owner and go, that bastard, right? And I'm talking about the sweetest woman. But when it came around that, I remember feeling awkward around that, it was. Like a resentment energy. It was a resentment energy, right?

And I think that could build if you're someone struggling financially and you see someone, it seems easier if you're in a job and your boss or the owner is, you know, someone who's not ethical and not a good person. I was gonna use another word, but I won't swear today. Right. Those things can slowly build. There's another thing I wanna share, and I'm gonna digress.

I've never been asked this question before. I've never shared this answer without realizing it. Sometimes people fall into a career mindset. I'm not knocking a career mindset, but as a career mindset, you try to get good grades, you try to get the right school, you get a job, and you go, I would assume, especially your clients, you go into this career with ideas. And I want to change the world, and I want to get raises and promotions, and I want to impact others.

And in that work environment, so many people, it's toxic. Meaning you have an idea, it's squashed. You try something new, you can't. You might have a boss that's got his thumb on your head or her thumb on your head. So every time you bring something up, they either steal it or they don't share it because they don't want you to shine the light on you.

And what happens to people over time? They lose that innovation, that ambition. And Joe, well, that's the way it is here. I'll just do my job, I'll keep my head down, I'll get my raises, and I'll go through it. And all of a sudden, you slowly lose touch with those dreams.

You have the desire to do your own thing, to travel more, to see the world, to be at every baseball game, to be a stay at home dad, a stay at home mom. You start losing those. Well, simultaneously, people are not listening to your things, and your creativity gets shrunk. And all of a sudden, I believe there's an adversity to money, because money, someone else has the freedom, someone else has the joy, and maybe they had a different path, or maybe it didn't work, or maybe they got lucky, or maybe, you know, must be nice, as my mom said. And I would just.

This is not the perfect answer because I've never been asked this, but I would just really explore if somebody with money or thinking of money makes you feel a little off. I would get a journal, like is in both in front of us right now and say, why does money make me feel off? Is it because people with money are greedy? Are people with money bad? You know, is capitalism bad?

Right? I mean, I employ, between our couple of companies, there's over 400 people we employ. We have a get together, and they bring their families and kids, and we get to see all this impact that we get to make through all these people are out and they're spending and they're buying and they're doing things, and then we take and we donate some to charity. Like sometimes when you write it down and you look at it, you might go, am I misjudging money, or am I misjudging the people that I see with money and am I portraying them as they're a different type of person? All things come from belief.

You know this better than anyone. You write on it, you understand it. It's like your belief about money is gonna drive you. Because the other thing is, this is the last part I really wanna. I'm hope I'm.

I hope this is landing today is. If you have a deep belief that money is bad, if you have a deep belief that money, people with money are greedy, if you have a deep belief that they're horrible capitalists or whatever the number, the term in your head, deeply, and maybe it was your parents that put it there, or your professor, and it's living in there, and simultaneously, you're dying to start your project, your art project, or start your own business. You will be so conflicted, it'll never work. It'll be a self fulfilling prophecy, because every time you see a glimpse of success, you'll self sabotage. Because if you get money, then you're a greedy capitalist bastard and you're going to self sabotage.

And you go, I tried it three times. It doesn't work because everybody's greedy and nobody gives you a break. And it takes money to make money. And even the banks only loan people that have money. Screw that.

And you go back to the job where someone's thumb is on your head and it's self fulfilling, and you go, money sucks, and so do the people that have it. I'll just do my job. Wow. Right? That's a good question to ask people.

Lewis Howes
Yeah, right? So I would just say, what is. Go back. So how does someone get out of that? If someone has that mindset, how do they break?

Dean Graziosi
Okay. So I would say. I would put a piece of paper. I'd cut the paper in half, and I'd put your belief about money, okay, it's, people could be greedy, or people don't use it right. Or it's abusive, or some people just chase money and they forget happiness and all that stuff.

And then on the right side, I would just say, is it true? Is it true that everybody has money, is just greedy and doesn't care about other. Is it true that people are. Must be nice or whatever your feelings are? And then lucky.

Lewis Howes
They're lucky. They're lucky. And then the third thing I would write down is, if you had money, what would you do? That's interesting, right? Because I guarantee it's not gonna be, especially this audience.

Dean Graziosi
It's not gonna be new car, lamborghinis, watch travel all over. Yeah. It's gonna be, take care of my mom. I'd make sure my kids are okay. I wouldn't work that extra shift so I can be home at dinner time, take vacations.

Take vacations with my family, make memories that last a lifetime. And you're going to look at this list of what you would do with money. I'd give more to my church. I'd help people out in foreign countries that are going through wars. You'll look, I guarantee there won't be one thing on there that is like a negative.

Everything on that will be an impact to the world. So then can you. The fourth column would be, can I create new beliefs around money that I want to serve more. I want to give more away. I want to be a better human.

I want to work on myself finally. I want to get in better shape. I don't have time to get in shape. I want to go back into therapy. I want to finally stop drinking.

I want to finally stop smoking. Then all of a sudden, you look like those old beliefs are stupid. I mean, the only thing that changes could you imagine? And that's the last thing I'll say on this part. Imagine getting to the end of your life, and you get the chance to meet your maker and say, why didn't you live a fulfilled life?

Lewis Howes
Why didn't you live a fulfilled life? Yeah, why didn't you live a fulfilled life? It's like, no, it was. Okay, seriously. You didn't live into your full potential, Lewis.

Dean Graziosi
You didn't. Why didn't you go after that dream that you had to be an artist, to start your own business, to speak up, to create your own podcast, to write your own books to create courses, masterminds workshops, or the restaurant you wanted, the gardening company. Why didn't you do it? It's like, well, you know, people with money or money. Could you imagine God just, like, shaking his head and going, really?

Let me show you a video of the woman you could have been if you shifted those beliefs. You would have given away this to charity. You would have helped change the world. You would have fed the people in your town. You would have made sure your mom was okay.

She didn't have to worry about Social Security. You would have left your kids in a better place so they had a foundation in case something goes crazy with the world. That's how you could have been if you just shifted that thought around. Something so silly. Are there abusive people with money?

Yes, that's a fact. Other abusive people, there's alcohol out there. Do some people not drink it? And some people abuse it? That's a fact, right?

We have the decision. We get to decide how we can earn it ethically and distribute it with love. And if that's what we do, if we craft a new meaning around all of it, like when Richard Branson said, hey, you could go serve. That's great. We need that.

Or you could go give 100 grand to that thing. I'm like, I want to be the guy to bring the $100,000 check. I'm in. How do I get bigger, faster, stronger, hungrier? And it fueled me to go even faster.

Lewis Howes
Wow. Speaking of donating and giving money to charities, organizations, or people you feel that you want to be of service to, how old were you when you actually really were intentional about giving on a yearly basis? I'm assuming you, like, gave a little bit in church. You gave, like, you donated a little here and there. But when, what year or year was it where you're like, I'm gonna start trying to give more?

And why did you say you wanted to give more financially to the causes that you cared about and what unlocked on the other side of that? I'd love to say it was consistent before my forties, but it wasn't. I was just so hungry to. And so there's one more thing I wanna share. There's two I like sometimes.

Dean Graziosi
You know the saying, when you're on a plane, put your oxygen mask on first and then put it on the person next to you. Right? I want to give everybody permission to give themselves grace and put their oxygen mask on first, because if you spend the time, effort, and energy digging in, and you get that, like, all focus on that you don't have to feel greedy and say, wow, I'm making some money right now. I didn't give enough away this year. It's like, no, no, no.

I'm going to go so in on this business. By the time I'm 45 or 52, I'm going to give away 25% of my income or 20% of my income. But I got to get my oxygen mask on first, because you might be just. You got to figure out a new business or figure out a new thing or figure out a new job. The economy's going up and down.

Economy's going up and crazy politics, all this stuff. It's like, get yourself. Get your footing in, and then when you do, you got the opportunity to shift. And I have to tell you that probably in my forties, it became a consistent thing. And what I love, we have a couple of causes.

Our two youngest kids have some really bad allergies, so it's my wife's passion. We help out a local hospital that is really amazing. And we're building a ward there, and we do help out a lot with feeding America and a bunch of other. But I also love. I love.

I have a fund that I just leave there for stuff that comes up that I didn't know was coming. Right. Tony, for example, Tony Robbins, my partner and dear friend, on his 60th birthday party. Right? They threw a big party for him, and he would not allow a party to happen.

Lewis Howes
Yeah, I was there. Yeah. Oh, you were there. He wouldn't allow a party to happen for just him. It had to be about something, right?

Dean Graziosi
I had just donated a whole bunch in other areas, and we got to that event. He was like, I needed to donate more. Yeah, I got to that event. My heart. That's right.

You were there. I hugged you. When I stood up, my heart was so, like. Cause it was talking about children and slavery, and I had no idea it was at that depth. I don't know if you knew.

You hear of it. I didn't know it was that. But watching what was happening, and they're like, who's going to donate $5,500? And I'm like, $500,000? I donated a half a million that night, and I was able to do that.

And my wife and I went back. She was pregnant for Luca, who's four. She was pregnant for Luca. We went back to the hotel, and we were giddy because we were calculating how much that half a million, how many children would be saved. Beautiful, right?

And I don't know if anything was more rewarding than that, and that's still a lot of money for anybody. But. But to be able to do that, and then a month later, I donated $100,000 because I wanted to save some more kids. Right. So how do you.

Lewis Howes
I mean, when you make a big check like that, even if you've already donated a lot before then, and the ones leading up to that, it sounded like, and you make a big donation like that, that's still got to feel like, oh, the half a million dollars is leaving my bank account to go to this cause. You're hoping that they do the right things with the money, they steward the money the right way, and they take care of the money, and it goes towards the cause. Is there ever any fear when you're making a big donation? Like, a little anxiety of, like, oh, but how am I gonna make this money back? Yeah, you know what if I don't.

Get this money back? I would say hands. Louis, I love this conversation with you. Cause it's every question I would have asked at 41. Every single one.

Dean Graziosi
And then being partners with Tony especially, he donates more than anybody knows. Crazy. He drives me to push more and do more. I think I'm gonna do 100 grand. He's like, really?

Okay.

But I have to tell you, it feels that way at first. Uh huh. But I believe it's. There's this byproduct of growth in your life that you can't quantify or equate. You can't say, I donated a half a million here.

Oh, I got back a half. You just gotta have faith that there's new doors opening up. And whether it's true or not, it's my belief. Wow. Right?

But my belief wasn't there in my early forties. I would bet to say mid forties to 47 forties. It started to go, and now I'm 55 now in the last five years, it's just like, oh, what can we do? What can we solve? How can we help?

Because I know it's going to come back to me. Then I can give you more. Then it's going to come back, and I can give even more. So it's time, before you ask, I'd love to say, I read this book, I did this thing. It's like, it's time.

Lewis Howes
It's wisdom, experience, right? It's like Slumdog Millionaire, the movie, right. How do you have all those answers? Because it went through all these experiences. Pain lessons.

Dean Graziosi
Right. So I've been through all these experiences. So now they just build to that's to who I am at this current time. And if we do this in ten years, I'll be somebody different. Wow.

Lewis Howes
Speaking of Tony Robbins, I was at that event, and it was amazing to see that the amount that he donates at every one of his events for some type of charity or cause feeding America is one of his big. I think he donates all of his proceeds to his books or something like that to feeding America and billion meals or something, whatever it is. What would you say are the three biggest money lessons you've learned from Tony Robbins in being his business partner, one of his close friends, and just interacting with him and seeing how he gives. But also, he's an extraordinary earner. Right.

He generates and brings in a lot of money, but he's also a big donor of causes. What are three lessons you've learned from him? I would say number one, I just wrote down again, I love when you ask me questions I've never been asked before. Number one is his other businesses at this phase of his life make more than his core business. Really?

Dean Graziosi
Yeah. Right. Significantly more. So he's the personal brand of his main business, right? And he's running his events and books and courses.

So he told me a great story. His dear, dear friends with Peter Guber, right? And Peter Guber was a mentor to him. Right? And when Tony was younger, Peter Guber, once part of the Golden State warriors and every other team, academy awards, movies, everything.

Dynamic, amazing man. To only know him through Tony, right? So at a younger age, Tony's, if you know Tony Robbins story, he's on the road 250 days a year. He's doing five day events, seven day events, ten day events. He's speaking here, speaking there on the road.

Lives in a plane, lives in a hotel, right? And he is hustling. And Peter Guber invites him to go someplace, Egypt or something like that, on a fancy trip. And he's on this plane. And he said, he's on this plane.

And all of them there are on their way to being billionaires, writers in that. And he's like, man, my business doesn't have margin. I'm just like. He started thinking about how his business was so much work and so much effort, and these guys had better areas. And when he first left, then he diversified immediately.

He invested in this. Invested. And all of them suffered, really, all of them suffered because his main business, he didn't put his oxygen mask on yet at the level he could have. He didn't probably have his 10,000 hours. And yet, of course, he mastered at a young age, but he was mastering this on another level.

Long story short, he got some great advice from Peter and others. It's like, go back and master the one core business, because that core business, if it's mastered, then when the profits start distributing, you can. Number two, you ask me for three. Number two, you can give more. Number three is you can invest in other companies and projects that you like.

Lewis Howes
But don't do that until you master the core thing. And so, ten years, 15 years, whatever it was, head down in his business. All of a sudden, this thing became an incredible company that kicked out money that he could donate. He Daz donated a billion meals, which is insane. It kicked out money for next level donation.

Dean Graziosi
So his one philosophy is, give more number two. Another one would be empower the core business. And when that business is empowered, use those proceeds to invest in other great businesses. And now, over time, that goes to the. We all overestimate what we can do in a year and underestimate what we do in five or ten.

Five or ten. Now he's got the funds to invest, and now those other companies make him way more than his main business, but he still empowers his main business. It's still his love, still his passion. It's still his child. Right?

It's literally, you know, RRI, which is Robin's research international, the up unleashed power. Then date with destiny. Business mastery. That's his baby. But there's nothing they don't make anywhere near the money as other things, really.

Lewis Howes
But he's still putting just as much. Time, more time, because it's his passion, it's his thing, and it was the machine. And I think we live in a world today where we try something for a year and go, that's not it. What's next? Oh, that's not it.

Dean Graziosi
What's next? Right. You need the 10,000 hours. You need the time to break the barrier and find your lane. So after 40 years, he's still doubling down on his main thing, even though it's not making the majority of it.

Absolutely. So it's a great lesson with our company at Tony and I own together mastermind. It's like I'm all in on this foundational company that's growing exponentially, and that'll produce so many results as we move on. What happens if someone gets too much money before they're emotionally or mentally ready for it? What will happen to them if they've come into a lot of money with that lack of emotional wealth?

Yeah, we see it in the news all the time. Right. I mean, I think that's self aware. I mean, why do the majority of people who hit the lotto go broke? They didn't have the emotional wherewithal, right.

I feel bad for them, and they probably get taken advantage of. They don't understand money. I mean, most people don't understand how money works. I get that. And everybody should get some financial literacy to really understand it.

But I think the answer is really simple. In most cases. Not saying in most cases, you could just look at lotto winners, you can look at families. I've seen inheritances, lottery winners. I am so I have to tell you this sounds like, you know, money, people with money problems.

But I lived in a trailer. Everything I said was true. I know your history. My kids are growing up completely different. I have never seen a trust fund kid to this day that was just hand in money, without responsibility, without any education.

I tell my family, my kids, I'm running the first leg of the marathon, and when I'm gone, I'm gonna hand the baton off to you. If you want to run and you want to run hard, you can continue. If you don't want to run, if you think I'm just going to hand you the baton, you don't. You can go work and be a teacher, and I'll double your salary. But you'll never be a part of the family, in the family.

Like the money, the money part. Right. So the reason I'm saying that is because I worry every day, I do not want my children to just have money at their access whenever they want before they understand the value, the value creation contribution, all the things that took me to 40. I'm hoping I can get it in them by their 35. But if I'm here, that'll happen 100%.

If I'm not, my entire will, my entire statement is they have to go through certain trainings. They have to do things. They don't get access to even see what's going on till they're in their thirties. And when they do, they don't just get checks. They have the opportunity to enhance whatever it is I've done.

They can grab the baton and go, hey, I want this division, or I want that. Because that's my biggest fear. Cause I think you're 1000% right. And I also think that's where money could get a bad rap. Because you see somebody who got money before they got the wisdom behind it, and they abuse it.

Lewis Howes
Yeah. Wow. What would you say are the three biggest money? Excuse me? What would you say are the three biggest mindset issues that you see people holding them back from?

Making money easy in their life, making more money easier in their life. What would be the mindset issues that hold them back?

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Dean Graziosi
No. Easy money. Right. You have to follow a plan. You can get there quicker by modeling proven practices.

Lewis Howes
How do you make money easy for you? So it doesn't feel like this hard thing. That's unbelievable. It's too hard to make. It's exhausting.

Dean Graziosi
Got it. I understand the question. Yeah, yeah, I get it now. Not make easy money. Right.

Lewis Howes
Make money easy. Got it, got it. The greatest thing in the world. I know the answer is, don't start from scratch. Don't try to figure it out on your own.

Dean Graziosi
Model proven practices. So not to. Not to talk about my family so much. My daughter's gonna be 18. She's going into 12th grade, and I gave her an option since you and all my kids will give the same option after school.

After high school, they can go to college if they want, or they can go mentor under someone for two years. Right. If my daughter wanted to be in podcasts, I say move out to LA, work for Lewis for free, and you have to be his best employee if Louis doesn't think you're the best employee he's got. But the only way I would do it is if you can learn from Louis, if you get time to talk to him, to watch, observe, take notes, be an apprentice. Right?

Because the fastest way to get from where you are to where you want to be is find something that you're passionate about. Then find someone who's good at it and learn everything they've done. So you can start off on third base, right? So so many people, when they think about money, it's like. Or they think about this career is unfulfilling.

I gotta get out. And then they go over here and online, how to make six figures in six weeks, how to do this, get rich doing this. It's like, ah, I'll just stick with the thing I hate. It's like, you gotta find someone who's got a proven path, a proven plan. Like, every time my brain, at this phase of my life, when I think how to do something, my brain has converted it to who's already done it.

And how can I learn from there, right? Yesterday, we're doing a big event in June. Yesterday, there's a gentleman that really is great at events, and I think Tony and I do events better than anyone. I'm willing to learn from anybody, but we want to make this bigger and better than anything. Yesterday, I spent a good chunk of money and hired someone for half a day to come in and just share everything he knows about live events.

And the truth is, I knew 90% of it. But there was 10% of like, damn, I didn't think about that. You probably knew 99% of it, right? There was a couple things. I was like, oh, my God, I never thought of that.

So my brain is always who versus how? Cause Tony calls it the tyranny of how. It's like, oh, I want to get my social media account going, how do I do that? But if you can hire somebody knows social media who can do this, who can do that? Oh, they can do that while I do this.

And then I can make money over here and I can pay them to do it right. So I would say everything's easier when you model proven practices. You get a blueprint, you get the roadmap. When people think, well, I don't know, the right people don't have the right connections, I don't know people who have money. How can people get out of that mindset and start thinking about how to find the who in different ways?

Lewis Howes
How do they enroll people in giving them time, energy and energy? I love it. I love it. You know, I, first off, I've been on this earth long enough that when I was a kid, there were no podcasts, there were no digital books. I had dyslexia, so reading was brutal before I could listen to an audio, right?

Dean Graziosi
We didn't have access to information, access to AI, now access to amazing books, access to amazing podcasts. You can go back in all your years of interview, and how many great interviews have you had about money? Probably a bunch. I've had a handful. Yeah.

Lewis Howes
Yeah, I'm a bunch of them. Think about going through your old podcast of finding the ones about money, about wealth. Go find others that are respected and have depth and breadth. They're not just the guy that's telling you how to get rich for five minutes because he's actually getting rich. Helping people think they can get rich, right?

Dean Graziosi
Like the person who's actually done the thing and just start absorbing it. When there's a will, there's a way dud like you've been saying it for. But when you want to learn something, the teacher is there, right? And then as you start learning, as you start developing and you're watching podcasts and you're taking notes and you get to correlate, and then you maybe go to AI and go, I learned these three things. How does that all tie together?

And AI helps you bring it together. And then you might say, hey, I'm going to start reaching out to some of these people because they're going to feel my passion, my desire, my interest. I mean, I have done interviews with people that aren't big podcasters, that didn't go anywhere, where people just wrote me the nice enough message my team sent to me and go, this kid or this woman, she's just a hustler. Would you give her 20 minutes? I will.

Right. And that only happens, though, when you feel someone's passion. So it is the teacher's there. You just gotta good attitude, passion, and all these different things. I heard you say online one time that the only thing standing between you and your next level is the story you tell yourself on why you can't get there.

Lewis Howes
If someone has just had a challenging life growing up where it just felt like everything was against them, and they have a belief system, memories and stories that are proof and evidence of why they're not good enough, talented enough, or capable of finding the right people, going after what they want or whatever circumstance or situation they might have, it's strong evidence showing that it's not possible to get to the next level. How can someone start to tell a different story that they can actually believe it's possible to get out of a challenging situation, personally, financially, relationship into a better situation? You know, it's probably because I don't want to answer this too simply. This is a really great question. It's probably because I try to absorb as much wisdom as I can from others who have done it before.

Dean Graziosi
And I see the. The mismatch or the mismatch of personal experiences and trauma and things that go wrong with so many successful people. You get to see it every day, right? When you and I get the opportunity, when we've masterminded together and really talked deep when no one's around. Like, I feel like I'm at this phase where I want to.

If I had the chance to sit down with everybody individually, I could look at them and go, no, no, no. All of that crap happened because it needed to form the woman you are. Yeah, that's the good stuff. You wouldn't be the man you are if you weren't on the couch, if you didn't think like, all of those things built this guy. Who's Lewis Howes that you can be this amazing man to your partner right now, that you can look like all of those things had to happen, but it's so hard when you're in it.

Like, oh, really? I had to get cheated on. I had to lose this relationship. I'm part business partner. Had to steal my money, right?

Unfortunately, yes. Because you can look at it any way you want. I'll share this. And I go back to personal stories, just so I hope it relates. Twelve years old, I moved in with my dad.

Very, very confrontational. My dad was the youngest of twelve. He was physically abused, sexually abused. He's okay with me sharing that. And old school Italian didn't get help.

New York guy just scared away every wife. My sister hasn't talked to him in 25 years. Right. So Scarrett didn't talk to one of his brothers and sisters. Right?

Lewis Howes
You have twelve similar. And doesn't talk to any of them. It was just a dysfunctional family. So he decided, I'm going to be a better dad. But he couldn't.

Dean Graziosi
He didn't get any help. Yeah, the tools. He was rough, so that's all. The women ran. Everybody ran away from him.

At twelve years old, he terrorized my mom so much that he said. I said, when we leave my mother alone, right? He said, move in with me, I'll never bug her again. So I moved in with this guy. My mom was devastated and she's like, you can't.

I'm like, I am. I wouldn't tell her how. Why? Because I knew she wouldn't let me. So I move in with this guy.

Lewis Howes
You're twelve? I'm twelve. He's living alone. He's living in a tiny little place. The heat's barely on.

Dean Graziosi
In the place. We had a little electric heater that kept the place warm. It was a nightmare. I'm like, I left my mom. We lived in a cul de sac.

I had a mongoose BMX bike, I had friends. Now I move in this hole, excuse my language. I move in this guy and he's a mess. Like, I'm older now. I could see just a disaster.

This guy is bipolar, or somebody can diagnose it better than that. But some days he's super dad, letting me drive at twelve years old, taking me fishing. And other days I'm vomiting blood because I have a bleeding ulcer, because I'm so afraid he's going to get violent with people and get arrested again and do all this stuff, right? So I got this guy that is my hero and the guy I'm scared to death of. But by the time I was 15, I started understanding emotions and I understand how he would feel.

I understood how it came from. I started empathy for him. And I could watch him come in with like, terrorizing. His name's Paul. Terrorizing.

If he was, he'll listen to this and he'll be totally cool with it. He's an amazing guy. He's 87 now, and he's in a beautiful space. But I saw Paul the terrorizer, the one that my mom was afraid of and everybody was afraid of. Come in.

I could spin that guy, and I could get him to be that loving dad that would take me fishing. Now, when I was in my twenties, and probably late teens, early twenties, I remember thinking, how could I ever be successful like my dad? Like, he's never made, like, all the things I went through and the divorces and the crazy dad. But there was a time that flipped. And if I look at my life now, and you've watched me go on stage in front of, I mean, when the Conway, we had half a million people live at the same time.

Lewis Howes
Amazing. And I can go, and I believe I can feel people's hearts. Wow. I can read them, and I can adjust what I'm doing, and I can present with confidence. That was all crafted by the crazy Paul because it was the protection.

Dean Graziosi
So I could stop having a bleeding ulcer. I got off the bus and threw up blood. 13 years old. Wow. And I had a little blood in my mouth.

In debt. My father's like, what is on your lip? And I couldn't tell him because in his head, if I had a bleeding ulcer, it was because my mom left him when I was three. It was all my mom's fault. If she didn't leave me, we'd have no divorce.

She'd be a happy kid. He didn't realize it was his craziness. And he'd take a baseball bat and drive to my mom's house and knock all the windows out of her car and her house. They'd call the cops and they'd be fighting, and I'd be in the car shaking, right? So all those things happened.

I only say that because that could have been. And this sounds like I'm just talking. Look how great I am. I just want to share. I was able to convert that loose from.

How could that happen to a kid? To thank God it happened to me. Now, for a living, I can use this empathy, I can use this compassion. I can impact others. I can get up on stage, even though I'm an introvert, and be able to talk to people and go, I'm going to throw away the presentation I had because this crowd needs this.

I learned all of that from that crazy guy. All of it. So I'm only sharing. I don't want to make it simple. Life happens for us.

Not to us. That's Tony Robbins. And I love that saying. I don't want to just make that a simple little throwaway, but I really want to share life, really, if we can. Life already happened for us.

And if you had crappy stuff, I'm so sorry, but you get to make the decision today and go, I can't change any of it, because that was the ingredients that got me here today to be who I am. So I have to say, thankful for. Yeah, I have to. Man, that's powerful. And it's so hard when you're in the sadness or suffering or trying to be like, this is all going to benefit me in the future, and you'll.

Never feel that way. Like, get me out of here. But you get to a point where you go like, and that is such a great. I don't ever want anybody to think I go through crap. And I still, of course, do.

And go, oh, thank for this. But there is. I'm at a place in my life go, this sucks. But I know it's happening for a reason. Yeah.

Lewis Howes
Cause every bad thing. And then I'm like. Then I'm looking like, all right, when is it gonna. Sometimes it takes longer. Like, do this one not.

Dean Graziosi
And eventually, always. There's a reason. It always does. And when you think back at all the painful moments, you see, this is how it applies. And a benefit to me today that had to happen.

Lewis Howes
As painful as that was, like, me getting injured and you going through this for your dad or all these different things, it had to happen for us to be where we're at today, but we had to make meaning of it and sense of it and alchemize it into something good. Absolutely. Absolutely. Speaking of alchemy into something good, you took all this wisdom and experience and passion and hunger to build a business, to make money, and to kind of run away from the pain by saying, I'm going to be financially free, so I'm never broke again. You use that pain into financial freedom.

But did you ever have a moment where your self worth or your identity was tied to money? Absolutely. And what happens when we tie our self worth to our net worth? And how do we not make sure that when our bank account goes up or down, our identity and our personal belief in self doesn't go up and down as well? It might be impossible.

Okay, tell me more. So I'm just like, I want to answer honestly today. That's another thing. Over time, it slowly fades away. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm at a phase of my life, but I want to tell you, if you asked me that question 1015 years ago, five years ago, really? Like, if you would have lost a little bit of money one year than the year before, and when it went down, would it affect your self worth? It does. It does and it will.

Why is that, though? Why is that for? Is it because money is energy and it's. But not. Probably not for everyone, but for me.

Dean Graziosi
I ran away from not having money and retiring your parents and taking care of people and all the things that you do. And then the thought of going, here's the words that I believe. Never said these out loud. The thought of going backwards, like, what if I don't have the freedom? What if I had to tell my mom I can't send you that check.

What if the place you've been, we go away each summer and we spend three weeks on the beach. What if I can't take my kids there and make those memories? So I would say some of it is self worth, but it's, again, going upstream. What's it attached to? I won't have.

And I think this is a really big one. I won't. This is mine. So this is a little therapy for DNA. That's good.

Lewis Howes
I love it. Mine would be, I'm not in control of my decisions. If I don't have the money, I can't maybe take my kids out of school. I might have to work late and miss the big baseball game. I might have to work late.

Dean Graziosi
I might have to work through the summer and not spend three weeks with the kids. It's been everything since they were born. So for me, it's going backwards and not have choices. To this day, if you said you're gonna go backwards and I gotta take some of your choices away, it would still ding. My instrument, my core.

Lewis Howes
But I mean, okay, I get emotionally, if you lose some money, right, let's say 10% of your money goes away for whatever reason, the business goes down or something happens or, I don't know, we talking broke? Not broke, but just some of it goes away. Right? Right. But you still.

But analytically, you see your numbers and you still have tons of money to be retired for the next. It's still 30 years. It still hits you. Really. It still hits you.

Dean Graziosi
And over time, I promise you, or anybody listening right now, in a decade, you'll laugh at it and go, hey, am I okay with that? Because I, like, my lifestyle is worth more, right? In ten years from now, five years from now, you might have a three year old and you go, I'm used to making this and this quality life, right? So when you make less. But I would take a 25% cut in that pay because my significance of being a dad is exponential to that money.

And that's how it trades off. I would say pre kids, right?

When it's just you, it is a hard one. And I'm not putting this on you. I'm not even saying you're asking this question for you. It does. Because we live in this, and we do live in this world.

It's like we feel like we're measured on the success that we've had, right? And all of a sudden, if you're going backwards a little, it's like, am I the man? I said I am. Am I really good at my interviews? Am I really good at marketing?

Am I really good at doing this thing? And all that stuff comes into question. All I would say is, sit with it and just do the thing we talked about around money. It's like, is that true? Like, I see your life.

This is probably not about you. I know you're doing amazing, but I see you so much richer today than when I first met you. So much richer. I don't care if you were making ten times the money, then you are a richer man. You are in, like, the love you give, the energy you give off.

Every conversation I have with you, the personal work that you do. I sent you a nice audio two weeks ago about something you did. I was like, I'm so freaking proud of you. In my eyes, you might not see it. I'm using you as an example.

I know this for people. But you might say, oh, I made a little bit less this year than last year. From the outside, I'm like, is that dude rich? But it takes time. And I just would say, when you feel that way, really question it.

Like, don't just let it sit. Don't just feel it. Or, you know. Cause you'll be in a conversation. I know what it was like when I thought I was doing well, doing $10 million a year, and I'm like, I came from nothing.

I'm doing a trail at park. I'm doing $10 million in gross revenue a year. I get to keep a million of that for me, or $2 million, whatever I'm doing amazing. And then I go sit with somebody who's doing 100 million, and it feels like they got it systemized and they're going to get on their plane and they look like they work way less than me. They're relaxed, and they're going to go.

They're flying off to the coffin every day, and they're flying off to Italy to spend time on the Amalfi coast. And I'm like, oh, my God, I am such a loser. It's all perspective, right? And how do we not compare ourselves to others when around money conversations, can I tell you that friends, family, colleagues, who might be making more, say, I'm worse than them or I'm. No, it's.

This is real conversation. Right? That's what I like. Real conversation. And the fact of the matter is, there's only really one way to do it, is you got to look backwards.

You have to be. You have to. A culture of progress, right? Not a culture of comparison. Oh, man.

And that's not an easy one, but it's true, because if you look back at where you were, if I look back at where we are, we grew like rockets. Yes. We're not supposed to be here. Like, if someone, I barely got out of high school, didn't go to college, had dyslexia, graduated high school with $0.09 in my pocket and started working on cars, what statistical mathematical percentage would you give that kid to be able to. And I'm blessed to be you.

Lewis Howes
Zero, zero, 1%. Yeah, zero, zero, 1%. Like, if someone gave you, like, I'm going to retire my mom and I'm going to do all these things. Somebody be like, that is so cute. Go work on your collision.

Dean Graziosi
You know, go pound another fender. Right? So when I look back at that kid who was just dying to make $1,000 a week so I could take care of my mom and do that, man, I'm a rocket ship. But if I compare myself in two weeks, when I see Richard Branson and go, wow, he's a billionaire, right? So culture of progress versus culture of comparison.

Lewis Howes
Yeah, there's so many more questions. It takes time. It takes time, though. But just know all, here's what I love. You're asking the right questions for everybody listening today.

Dean Graziosi
Because wherever you are on this scale and the spectrum, know that when you stay engaged in personal development, when you ask the right questions, when you question your beliefs, when you go upstream and say, is that true? Is that really. Is that a fact, or is that just a belief I have around the fact? And where did I get that? And how would I feel if I showed you shifted that?

And what if I created new beliefs? And what if I. It's not something you do when you listen to a great podcast or read a great book or go to a Tony Robbins event. It's something you got to do all the time, and then slowly it becomes a part of your life. Yes.

I wish, like, I've done the work and be like, I feel the best in my life. I'm ripped at 45. I feel great, and then I forget and I slack off, and three years later, I wake up and go, ugh. I feel like in, like, consistent repetition. It's like going to the gym.

You gotta go all the time. Consistent repetition. It's interesting because I was just with, yesterday, I was just with the number one pickleball player in the world, where pickleball is. 40 million people around the world play this sport. It's like this rising sport, and I was doing, I was playing against the number one player in the world yesterday.

That's so cool. We were just doing a practice, but I couldn't score one point on him, right. And I'm like an athlete, but it was so frustrating. 2 hours with this guy, not one point. Not one point.

Now I get it now. I eventually got one point, but it was like he made a mistake. That was why, okay, I got a point or two, and at the end, we'd do Asana, we'd do a cold plunge. Cause he just finished a tournament where he won. He's the number one player in the world in singles and doubles and in mixed doubles.

Lewis Howes
Number one in all three categories in the world. Wow. 25 year old, his name is Ben Jons. And I said, what is the one thing that it takes for you to be number one in the world consistently? And he said, consistent repetition.

He's like, most people just don't want to keep showing up every day and doing practice for four or 5 hours a day, doing the recovery, doing the prevention stuff. Like, it's just, I've been putting in the reps for eight years in the sport, and I keep putting in the reps. Kind of going back to what Tony, you know, he mentioned Tony. He's like 45 plus years in. He keeps doing the reps, and he gets better and better.

It's interesting there. I want to ask you a couple more questions before I transition into where people can listen and who are watching now, who, I think if they're trying to figure out ways to generate more revenue for themselves, if they're trying to figure out ways to use their art, their talent, their passion, and what they can do, I want to talk about that in a minute, but I've got a couple questions before we address that, and I wanted to ask you about the three habits that you think keep people broke. A lot of people, they work really hard. They still kind of have, they're still kind of broke, or they're struggling and they stay in debt. What would you say?

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Lewis Howes
Well, multitasking pro cars, like the ones in the gym parking lot are for sale on Autotrader. New cars, used cars, electric cars, maybe even flying cars. Okay, no flying cars. But as soon as they get invented, they'll be on auto trainer. Just you wait.

Auto trader. I would say not identifying habits that don't serve them right. You know, I wrote a book on habits, so that kind of, you know, that's my glasses, right? Sometimes if you have a hammer, you only see a nail. For me, though, if I look back at people in my life, my family, others, they didn't realize that they had habits that actually pulled them away.

Dean Graziosi
The habit could be waking up in the morning and I look at everything as a habit. It could be waking up in the morning and watching your news, no matter where you get your news from, right. Never in my life have ever watched the news and felt empowered. Right? So you gotta have a habit of waking up and watching the news.

It puts you in a reactive space, in a defensive space, and you're never innovating, you're never creating. Yes. Right. So I would look for habits. Like, in the morning, you could wake up and just say two or three sentences of gratitude.

You could get out of bed, drink a green drink and take a walk. Or you could get up, click on the news, grab your phone, look at your emails and texts, find the bad one that puts you in a bad mood, and go eat, have coffee and a donut. Now, I'm not knocking you one. But they're both habits. Yes.

One habit makes you feel, I believe you're more on offense. Like, hey, I fed my body, I took a walk. I'm grateful to God, I prayed, or whatever it is I do. Another one's like, ugh, that third email for the same thing. And you believe the trials that are going on, the election that's going on.

Same morning, same thing. Two completely different experiences. One says, bring the day. I got it. The other one says, what do I have to fight today?

Lewis Howes
Yes. Right. That's a habit to me. So that's the first one kind of identifying them. Yeah.

Dean Graziosi
Number two is, and I've never shared these, so I'm just winging them. Yep. Is stop making the thought of making money a mystery. Right. Like, how do they do it?

How do they get rich? Dig under the hood. Like, find somebody in something that lights you up. Right. Don't just look for making money for the sense of money.

Find something that, if you like interior design, if you like courses, if you like doing podcasts, find somebody who's doing it well and making money and learn everything they're doing, because it's not a mystery. There are blueprints everywhere. Right. And I think sometimes we're just like, I'd like to make more money, but how would you like to make more money doing something you hated every day? Right.

Would you replace. So I think that's the third one. And the fourth one, I would say, is this crazy outside world, I believe, is a magnifying glass. If you have uncertainty, it will ten times it. You'll find uncertainty.

Yes. So, in times like this, we have two options. Which is the choice? We could see obstacles or opportunity. And I would try to train my brain to.

Every time you see an obs, ah, this has happened. I say, what is the opportunity in this? What is the opportunity in this? So, if I had more time, I probably would have thought more, but I would see opportunity over obstacles. I would try to focus on what you have, not what you lost.

And those things sound like, oh, yeah, but how do I. You know, but those things are the foundational. If I had to add a four. Find an emerging market, don't. I know there's a simple analogy, but you wouldn't want to invest in taxicabs when there's Uber.

Right. But so many people do that. They go into something that was second, secondary, like, find something that's emerging, meet the world where it's going, not where it was. Right. What is Wayne Gretzky's great quote?

Lewis Howes
Yeah, yeah. Go to where the puck is going. Skate to where the puck is going. Do your research, look at AI model of the people, look where the world's going, and get there before other people. Yeah, that's cool.

That's what I did with podcasting. I know you did. Eleven years ago. It's like, this maybe could be a thing and it may not always work out for you, but like, be willing to invest it and take the time in it. I like that.

Five years ago, I've been on a lot of amazing trips in my life. I feel blessed to have traveled the world and just done so many different things in my life. But five years ago, I went on a trip with you and Tony Robbins and Fiji with about 20 of us for a week. And during this time, I remember Tony saying something, or maybe it was you and Tony at the same time saying like, winter is coming. I remember hearing this five years ago.

This was right before the pandemic kind of ended. Like maybe it was like four and a half years ago. And he said, winter is coming. And you backed it with, make sure you're really innovating your gifts and talents and not just protecting yourself, but progressing yourself and putting yourself out there so you can feel more abundant in your life, as opposed to feeling scarce and feeling like you have to just hunker down and wait for winter to pass. And you and Tony have done something every year where you teach and educate people for free in a big live experience online on how to optimize the skills and talents and knowledge they have in order to earn some extra income, launch their business and many other things in this creator economy.

I'm curious, can you share? And you have this coming up as well. About a million people show up live for this around the world. Can you share what people can learn if they're just like, I don't really know what to do with my career or the opportunities I have or how to make some extra income. Great question.

How they, what they're going to learn from this experience you have with them, this live online event that's free and what they can start doing now to prepare for that. Yeah. So I would start with the first word of investigate. If you have a business that's not as profitable as you'd like it to be, yes, come investigate and I'll give you the answer in a minute here. If you are in a career that is just, it's served for a certain time in your life, but it's not fulfilling anymore.

Dean Graziosi
In fact, you despise it come investigate. And if you're that person that knows you're inside, like your inner entrepreneur is dying to come out, but you're not sure where to start, come investigate. And that's all I say. In life, we have to look at these different paths. Here's what I think we're calling the event.

The game has changed, and it's time for the new playbook. Right, but what does that mean, the game has changed? I think Covid gave us a byproduct. It gave a lot of byproducts, but one byproduct, I think it did, is made people realize, I think people used to say, I'm either gonna, I can get this career. It might not serve my soul, but it'll take care of my family, or I can be the craziest entrepreneur, and maybe it'll work out.

I think, where the game has changed. And I'll lose my health and my. Relationships in the place right where I think it's changed is in what Tony and I love to share, and it's the industry we're in. He's been in 45 years. I've been in almost 30.

Right. In the industry of our life experience is the greatest asset that we own. Right. And I'll talk more about that in a minute. But where the game has changed, high level is that you don't have to separate those two anymore.

I like the term life work integration. Yes. Right. Not balance. Not balance.

It never balances. Has it ever balanced for you? Never. Right. But when you can go home and your work is okay to bring with you, because it's a part of your soul and you love it.

For me, having the opportunity to take a life experience, a career skill, a passion you have, and learn how to extract it and package it into a product or an asset and be able to give it to somebody, and you get to shorten their distance from where they are to where they want to be, you have a business, you have a career skill. You know how to sell better, do hair better, or you went through a divorce and you're on the other side and you're happy or you lost yourself or you lost the weight or you do yoga or any other thing that you do so well, my physical therapist, because I got a torn ACL, I'm working with them twice a week. I went skiing torn. My ACL happened to be last year, too, man. So annoying.

But I'm working with them twice a week, and I'm watching. This guy's got his own business, but he's in the time and effort, community. I said, do you have any course or training I could do when you're not with me? He's like, no. So I got him.

Right now, he's extracting his life experience. He's building the course. I can't wait to buy it from him. Right. Every single person on this planet has a life experience that is valuable when you know how to extract it.

So Tony and I are great at. Right. And the reason we can't, we love to share it each year, is because just most people don't know how to turn that into something of value. And that's what we share over three years. How do you identify what it is?

Who would want it? How do you name it? How do you price it? How do you deliver it? With passion that you have fun with and whatever delivery system you want.

How do you get people to say yes without feeling like a salesperson? So we get to do that, and it's turned into a movement. I mean, you were part of it day one. You were part of the first one we did as a friend. And now it's this.

Millions of people around the world have been part of it. We're in over 120 countries, and people are realizing, I could do something I love. I could impact others. I could fall in love with it. And there's no glass ceiling.

Right? Not saying get rich overnight for doing nothing. That's not Tony and I. And the second part of the game has changed. The way we used to teach this is you had to figure it all out.

Now we have the opportunity to use AI, especially AI that thinks like Tony and I do, to exponentially get you off the blank page. So I heard somebody say, AI won't take your job. Someone who understands how to use it will. Right. I thought that was a great analogy.

So we want to show people how they could shorten the distance of starting your own thing, how they could build confidence with AI, not be scared of it. And how to do this in a time when it's exponentially growing. I mean, the business when I started 30 years ago was a tiny little niche, as you can imagine, when Tony started 40 plus years ago, tiny. Now it's a billion dollar a day industry, and it's being fueled by regular people. Billion dollars a day.

A day. Yep. They predict it'll be. It'll be a trillion dollars a year. What is this industry called?

You could call it the knowledge industry, the self education industry. It's someone who builds a community or creates a course or has a weekend workshop or does a monthly Zoom call, or does a coaching call, or, heck, writes a book, starts a podcast. I mean, you are your whole business. You're in the information business. You interview amazing people, some of my favorite guests ever, people you've had on, and we all tune into that because of information.

And sponsors pay you and other people pay you because you're bringing information, right? I'm going to give you one more story. If you have a business right now, if you have a business right now and you don't have a line item on your profit and loss statement, that's an information product. You're missing out. Right?

I was joking. We're at dinner. I'm telling us one quick story, just so. So I believe if you want to start a business, there is no better time to start it. So I'm just going to pre frame this.

And why not create an asset that you own already that you don't have to warehouse, you don't have to store, you don't have to pay for it. It's got extreme value. You get to impact others. There's no glass ceiling. That's your information.

So number one, if you're going to start something, come investigate. You have three days for free, about 3 hours a day. Tony and I are going to, hands down, deliver you all the time of your life, right? So that's number one. If you want to start something, if you've been dabbling in this, if you're a coach and you don't know how to get to that next level, we'll show you how to do that.

Third though, the third group that I think is a must is if you own a business. Or at dinner the other night with my wife and I was sitting with a great couple and they were saying, well, what do you mean? Every business should have this. I said, take my wife. My wife, she owns salons, right?

She owns extension bar in Phoenix. She was voted the top hairstylist eight out of ten years when I met her, right? Amazing. You know my wife? Yep.

So I said, take my wife for example. All the girls that work in her salon, when they're done, they offer shampoo on the wall, right? I said, babe, what is it, 15, $20? Yeah, whatever. You make a couple bucks on it.

I said, yes. They said, okay, great. I said, what if my wife, who went through propecia and lost her hair at one time, my wife has a daily routine on what she eats, how she eats, what she puts on her hair. Her hair is beautiful. It's shiny, it grew back.

I said, what if my wife created a course that women at home could make their hair look healthier, younger, shinier, help with propecia, eat better, be healthier. I said, and at the end of every session, instead of saying, do you want a bottle of shampoo? Say, hey. Our founder, Lisa Graziosi, created a course on how to do these five things at home on how to have healthier, shinier hair. Would you like me to add that for $37?

I said, you sell the same amount, it costs no money. It delivers massive value. The girls could make more commission. And my wife elbowed me. She's like, why didn't you tell?

I'm gonna. My wife literally wants to do it right now. Right. But my whole point is business. If you're a real estate investor, if you're in yoga, if you're a physical therapist, it doesn't matter if you're a mortgage broker.

If you don't have an information product to either enhance who you are and your reputation, or to actually sell it, you're missing out. So we're going to share that as well. Wow. It's beautiful. It's a free event.

Lewis Howes
It's online. It's three days. You and Tony Robbins live teaching each day. If they go to deanandtonylive.com Lewis, that will send them to a landing page where they can opt in for free and give them access to these three days. Yeah.

Dean Graziosi
And it's not kind of free. It's completely free. Yeah. There's no catch. It's an amazing experience.

Lewis Howes
And a million people register every year. Every year. It's crazy. So it's amazing. I mean, I've been there many times and seen it, and I know the stuff.

You're telling me behind the scenes, what's gonna happen this year is gonna be bigger and better than that. That's how they call it, the game machines. We're gonna blow everybody's mind. I know. We've done it five years in a row.

Dean Graziosi
If you've been to any of them, this would be unlike anything you've ever saw. Cause things have shifted. So, I mean, there's been more shift last year. It's been crazy. There's been more shift in the last twelve months than I would.

Tony and I agree. We think the last 20 years. Wow. Right? Like, you know, when I started, I had to walk uphill both ways in the snow, you know?

But I had to build a product. I had to put it in a warehouse. I had to do an infomercial. Cause there was no Internet like you know, you're in a quarter of a million bucks to see if you could. Sell phone sales rooms.

Lewis Howes
You gotta do the shipping to fulfill this stuff. Crazy stuff, right? But the last year, the way technology has advanced, the way AI's advance and listen, Tony and I haven't just been doing this for 70 plus years. Between the two of us, we still do the biggest events, the biggest trainers in the history of the world. There's nobody does million person events, right?

Dean Graziosi
The one we do in McConaughey, we had two and a half million people show up on day one, right? So we're one step ahead. I'm just being honest. Like, if you're dabbling this, we're one step ahead and we want to show everybody how to get one step ahead. Deanantonielive.com Lewis make sure you guys go there and register and sign up.

Lewis Howes
And while you're watching it live, let me know the biggest takeaway. Tag me. Tag dean on social media. Let us know the biggest takeaway as you're watching it live and take action on whatever you're learning. That's the key.

Investigate and then take action. You're all over social media, you know, deengraciosi.com Dean Graciosi on social media. But this is the main thing I want to send people to. And if for whatever reason, they're watching this and the event is over at that time, hopefully that link will send them to a place where they can opt in to either see, you know, a PDF or a replay at some point or something else in the future. So make sure you just register for whatever you see there.

People might watch this in six months, so make sure you go there and Deanandton Live.com Lewis to get more information. And I'm sure there's going to be a lot of value there. I wanted to ask you a couple final questions, but Dean, this has been amazing, and I want to acknowledge you before I ask the final questions for your consistent growth. Personally, the leader you are as a man, how you continue to evolve, how you have this beautiful family I know hasn't always been perfect in your life, but you keep evolving and you keep giving. So I want to acknowledge you.

You know, you flew out here for the day, to be honest. You're going to help me and my team with some strategy stuff. So I acknowledge you for the constant journey you're on. And also, like, you know, you reach out to people you care about when you see something in their life that matters. And so you've done that for me many times, and I'm just grateful and appreciative of you.

Dean Graziosi
Thank you. I feel the same way about you. Your leadership and your friendship. So I appreciate you for everything and the wisdom you've given today. I feel like the stuff you shared today, I've never heard you share.

I haven't. This is not on any other place, anywhere. I know, and I love it. I love it. I think you're doing something on money in the coming future, aren't you?

I can't wait. I can't wait. I can't wait. I think I asked you this question before, but it was, what, four or five years ago last time you're on. This is called the three truths.

Lewis Howes
You may not remember this. I don't. So it's a hypothetical question. Imagine you get to live as long as you want. Okay?

You're 100 something years old, AI. And science extends our lives by however many years. And you get to live the exact life you imagine from this moment until the last day. You get to create anything you want to create. You see your kids grow up and be successful and happy and great grandkids, all the different things.

But for whatever reason, on this hypothetical scenario and the last day of your life, you have to take everything with you. The content, the businesses, this podcast, the books. We don't have access to it in this world anymore. Hypothetically, it goes somewhere else. But on your last day, you get to leave behind three lessons to the world where we would get to keep these three.

I call them truths. What would be those three truths for you on your final day? I may not remember that question. Wow. Great question.

Dean Graziosi
I think three truths are. Is. Nothing is permanent.

Nothing is permanent. The worst day of your life, it will change. The best day of your life, it will fade. I think so many times in my life, when things went sideways, went wrong, moved in with my dad, something happened at 18, lost my first business in my twenties, it wasn't working out. I just.

I felt hopeless and down, and I wish at an earlier age I would have realized it was part of it. It's not permanent. That's just part of the process. So, number one. Number two, I have to go back to the thing I said, that the story, our lives are nothing more than the stories we tell ourselves, right?

You have to check the core belief. I mean, I probably learned that from Tony Robbins 27 years ago. So I don't want to act like that's new and revolutionary, but I live by that. Whenever something is wrong, I call it. I go upstream and go what is the belief I have to have to feel this crappy or feel this off or feel this stress?

I think the last one this might sound too cliche, is dream way bigger than you think? Dream way bigger. It is the same amount of work to do something ten times the size that it is one time. It's the same stress, it's the same worry, it's the same fall. You might as well aim bigger.

Lewis Howes
That's beautiful. Final question, what's your definition of greatness?

Dean Graziosi
Nonstop evolution growing. There you go, Dean. Appreciate you man. Thanks for being here. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness.

Lewis Howes
Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our greatness plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you, and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward.

And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.

Dean Graziosi
I love my cat, Tiger, and as my best friend, we speak our own language. What's that? You love your litter. He does. Because I use fresh step outstretch litter.

It absorbs 50% more waste and odor and requires less changing compared to fresh step multicat. Less changing means more time playing, right, tiger? That's a yes. Find fresh step Outstretch cat litter in the Pet aisle fresh step is a registered trademark of the Clorox pet products company. Certain trademarks used under license from the Procter and gamble company or its affiliate.

Speaker C
Earning your degree online doesn't mean you have to go about it alone. At Capella University, we're here to support you when you're ready, from enrollment counselors who get to know you and your goals to academic coaches who can help you form a plan to stay on track. We care about your success and are dedicated to helping you pursue your goals. Going back to school is a big step, but having support at every step of your academic journey can make a big difference. Imagine your future differently at capella.edu.

The Business Expert: The 3 Worst Financial Habits That Keep You Poor! w/ Dean Graziosi

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Episode Summary

Main Takeaways

Episode Chapters

1: Introduction to Dean Graziosi

2: The Psychological Impact of Money

3: Strategies for Financial Freedom

4: Role of Charity in Wealth

Actionable Advice

About This Episode

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Transcript