Armchair Anonymous: Stalking (Part 1)

This episode explores personal stories of stalking, emphasizing the emotional and psychological impacts on the victims.

1. Stalking often involves complex patterns of behavior that can escalate over time.
2. Victims may experience significant emotional and psychological distress.
3. The importance of taking early action and trusting one's instincts when feeling threatened.
4. Legal and security measures can be crucial in protecting oneself from stalkers.
5. Sharing experiences can provide support and raise awareness about the seriousness of stalking.

1. Introduction to the Theme

The hosts introduce the theme of stalking, discussing its psychological impact and complexity. Dax Shepard: "Stalking is about a pattern of behavior."

2. Madeline's Story

Madeline shares her disturbing experiences of being stalked, which includes discovering footprints and receiving mysterious phone calls. Madeline: "I remember it was winter...footprints coming from the woods up to our bedroom window."

3. Police Involvement

The story progresses as the stalker's identity is partially uncovered through police intervention. Dax Shepard: "We found a list of names in his wallet, and yours was one of them."

4. Melissa's Story

Melissa from Italy recounts her struggle with a stalker in her equestrian community, highlighting the complexity and dangers of her situation. Melissa: "She was extremely jealous... threatening vocal messages."

5. Resolution and Reflection

The episode concludes with the hosts reflecting on the stories and discussing the broader implications of stalking. Monica Padman: "It's a stepping stone... we think there's more just voyeurs than there are."

1. Trust Your Instincts: If you feel something is wrong, trust your gut and take protective measures.
2. Secure Your Home: Consider security cameras and adequate lighting around your property.
3. Document Everything: Keep records of any suspicious activities or encounters to aid in any potential legal actions.
4. Seek Support: Don't hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or professionals for support.
5. Stay Informed: Educate yourself about the legal options available in your area for dealing with stalkers.
6. Maintain Privacy: Be cautious about how much personal information you share online or in public spaces.
7. Community Awareness: Engage your community or neighborhood in safety and awareness initiatives.
8. Professional Help: Consult with security professionals to evaluate your home or personal security needs.
9. Legal Restraining Orders: Explore the possibility of obtaining a restraining order if threats escalate.
10. Emergency Preparedness: Have an emergency plan in place and familiarize yourself with it.

Dax and Monica talk to Armcherries! In today's episode, Armcherries tell us about a crazy stalking story.

People

Dax Shepard, Monica Padman, Madeline, Melissa

Companies

None

Books

None

Guest Name(s):

None

Content Warnings:

Content includes discussions of stalking and threats, which might be distressing for some listeners.

Dax Shepard
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We are supported by Squarespace. Guys, we have a Squarespace website that's just gorgeous. That wabi wab, you built that yourself using all the templates? Yeah. Yeah.

Easy peasy. So easy. Well, the best part about Squarespace is it's an all in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. You can get discovered fast with integrated, optimized SEO tools, and you can choose from professionally curated layouts and styling options with Squarespace blueprint. Plus, you can kickstart or update written content on any website, product description or email.

With Squarespace AI, head to squarespace.com for a free trial and save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain with the code Dax. Welcome, welcome. Welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard, and I'm joined by Lily Padman. So we ended up breaking up this prompt because these were wrong.

First time ever. Yeah. Which was totally short sighted on our part, because generally we say, like, tell us about a time you pooped your pants. That's a one event thing, and there's some details leading up to it. What we had underestimated is stalking is about a pattern of behavior.

So many things happen before you realize you're being stuck. So we stupidly underestimated how long these stories would be. Yes, but they were great. They're great and intense and wow. And worthy of two episodes.

So basically, this is part one of stalking. I'm inclined to give these warnings now because a lot of people were genuinely distraught when they hear this. So there is an animal death in this one. So if that's not for you, then just warning. That's in this one.

If you're fine with being terrified for a human, you know you can continue. But yes, stalking is stalking. So please enjoy armchair anonymous. Stalking hard times come and go good times take them slow my life I had them both remember one thing you gotta know Imma keep on shining. You ready for Madeline?

Yeah. Do it. Wait, I have to record. This is a really nice closet. It is a very nice closet.

Very well appointed. What did you say? Sorry. Okay, I can hear you now. First of all, sweet Ted Seeger sweatshirt.

Madeline
Oh, thank you. Love it. Thanks. Very nice closet. So nice.

Monica Padman
I envy it. I envy the organization, the space, what you've done with the place. That means a lot to me. Where are you at, Madeline? I live in Wisconsin.

Dax Shepard
Wonderful. What's the weather? Yeah, I was just gonna say, is it getting gorgeous yet? Yeah, it's actually 67 today, which is. Warm for us and getting green.

Madeline
I live out in the woods, so it's very noticeable when everything starts changing. Yeah, I think for me, Wisconsin, late spring, early summer is the greenest place I've ever been. Really? Oh, yeah. Well, you've never been to Iceland until this.

Monica Padman
Yeah, it might change. Keep saying that. You have a few more months to keep making fun of me that I haven't been. I will. Okay.

Dax Shepard
Enjoy it. That'll be fun. So, Madeline, this is a stalking prompt. And I presume you could either be the stalker or the stocky. I didn't even think about that.

Madeline
I guess I didn't anticipate people being the stalker. Oh, I can't. Well, we just interviewed an admitted stalker, Patrick Gagne. So you don't know this was a stocky situation. Okay, lay it out for us.

Okay. 2017 in February. I remember it was winter. Specifically, my now husband and I had moved into a house about a year prior, and in the backyard, it butted up to an elementary school and these, like, public woods that people could walk through. Oh, boy.

Dax Shepard
This is kind of my nightmare, if I can just say. It just seems, like, so fertile for people to be loitering and hanging and peeping, they have a very plausible excuse at all times. Like, oh, I'm taking a walk in the woods. Like, if someone's standing on your street staring your window and not moving. Sure.

Anyway, sorry, sorry. I digress. Yeah. So one morning we woke up and we just opened our curtains to, like, look outside, and we see footprints coming from the woods up to our bedroom window. Oh.

Monica Padman
Oh, because it's first floor. Yes. First floor ranch. Our bedroom points right to the backyard. Ah.

Dax Shepard
Very desirable layout for retirees. No stairs. Yeah, of course. So we thought it was weird, but we didn't think too much of it. There's, like, a lot of kids in our neighborhood.

Madeline
But these footprints were bigger than that. People cut through our yard a lot, so we were just, like, kind of weird. Doesn't really sit right, but didn't really do anything about it. Fast forward to that summer. One of our friends had just moved into our basement, and him and my husband went to, like, a fantasy football party.

So I was home alone. It was probably, like, 10:00 p.m. I'm watching tv in the living room by myself, and somebody knocks on the front door. Oh, my God. And the front door, like, looks directly into the living room.

So I get up and I answer it, and there's nobody there.

So I got a little freaked out. I was like, it's probably nothing, but I'm just gonna start getting ready for bed. And I head to my bedroom, and I had the window open because it was summer now. And I'm, like, taking my makeup off. And all of a sudden I hear in the landscaping, in the rocks right outside my window.

I hear crunching.

Yes. Oh, boy. Now I'm really freaked out. I grab my tweezers. Cause again, I was like, I think I heard something.

Dax Shepard
In case you gotta pluck any hairs off this. Yeah, that was my weapon. Well, you could really get someone in the eye. You gotta stab a couple thousand times. Okay.

Madeline
But I didn't wanna grab a knife. I thought I was being paranoid, right? I went and hid in the other bathroom, which had no windows, so I felt a little safer in there. And my first thought was that maybe my husband and his friend were messing with me. Like he just moved in.

I thought maybe they were trying to scare me. So I'm hiding in the bathroom, and I texted my husband, and I said, knock it off or I'm calling the cops. And he was like, what are you talking about? And he called me. And in the background I can hear that he's still at a party.

So I immediately started crying. Yeah. They rushed home and they went in the backyard with golf clubs, but they didn't see anybody. But again, our grass was long enough that you could see footprints coming from the woods. Okay, really quick, just as a family preparedness, the fact that your best weapon was tweezers.

Dax Shepard
And they've got golf clubs. We need at least an aluminum baseball bat in the house or something. Well, I'm not prepared. Super prepared. You know what I think is also tricky?

Cause is this kind of suburban Wisconsin. Yeah. We're in a town of, like, 60,000, so it's not huge. But at that house, we were more in town by the elementary school. Here's, I think, what's unique about LA, and maybe you could say that about New York.

I don't know. When I was in Michigan, kids were out fucking about all the time, so, like, the first thing could have been ding dong ditch. Kids aren't roaming downtown LA. So, like, there's a knock, there's not a kid. You can rule that out here.

But I would. Yeah. Think it was your husband, then. Also think maybe kids are fucking with me. Yeah, that was definitely another thought of mine.

Madeline
Cause we've had ding dong ditchers before, and that's kind of why I was like, don't be too freaked out. It might be a kid. But that was, like, the last very obvious thing that we noticed in our yard. Fast forward again a couple months. Really quick.

Dax Shepard
Is there any talk at that point about getting some ring cams or something? Yeah, exactly. Some security we did eventually, yes. Oh, okay. Okay.

Monica Padman
Okay. Feels like maybe. Okay. I'm not gonna. Victim shame.

Madeline
That would have prevented some things. Don't. Victim shame. So I was working an internship at a desk job at an office here, and I get a phone call at my desk from an unknown number, so I don't answer it. And they leave a voicemail.

And the voicemail said, hello, madeline, this is detective so and so. Can you call me back? Ooh. I was like, oh, my God, who died? So I ran out of the office and I called him back and he asked me, do you know of a.

We're gonna call him Brian Johnson. Yeah. And apologies to Brian Johnson's unless that's him. Or unless another Brian Johnson's a baddie. Okay, so you know Brian Johnson.

Dax Shepard
Sorry we're interrupting you so much. No, you're good. I said, no, I've never heard of this name before. And he said, well, I want you to know that you're not in any danger. But we found a list of names in his wallet, and yours was one of them.

Oh, my lord. What? Oh, boy. So it turns out that this Brian Johnson had been charged with stalking and sexually assaulting a woman in a parking lot. Oh.

Madeline
And when he found out that she had pressed charges against him, he ended up taking his own life. Oh. Oh, my lord. This is really. Whoa.

A little heavy. We had appropriate expectations with a stalking prompt. They're only gonna be so happy. Well, we don't know. We don't know yet.

Monica Padman
You're our first one. Maybe there's some happy moments. Maybe there's more, like an eighties rom.com version. Yeah, but, like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It turns out that there was a list of, like, five women, including me.

Madeline
We all worked at the same company, and so did this Brian. And he was in accounting. Oh, Brian Johnson from accounting. Oh, it makes sense. Oh, so he had all of our personal information, including our addresses.

But again, it didn't go to trial. Cause he had already committed suicide. This is where it gets really complicated, right? What part? Well, because if he doesn't kill himself, I go straight to like, this guy's an asshole.

Dax Shepard
He needs to get off the streets. What a terrible blah, blah, blah, blah. And then when you hear the suicide part, I can't help but go, like, he had some compulsion to do this. He somehow knew it was wrong enough to kill himself. He wasn't happy.

You know what I'm saying? In the same way that the young person who identified as a pedophile, who was seeking help. Also. This person isn't seeking help. No, but you know what I'm saying?

Like, they ended their life over this. That's why I changed his name, because I believe he still has a family and everything here. He probably just didn't want to face those consequences. I don't know if you know this detail, but did he disguise himself when he assaulted the coworker? Cause the coworker's gonna know you potentially, right?

Madeline
I don't think so. These were rumors. Like, I don't know how true this is, but I heard that she had been working out at the gym and seen him watching her through the window at the gym. And I think she knew who he was. I hate to say this, too, but a lot of these murder shows I've watched, like, most recently, the one that took place up in North California, that little island community.

Dax Shepard
Is that what it was? So many of these you hear. Oh, it was the weird fucking guy who, like, let a bunch of them go. American nightmare. Oh, sorry.

Yeah, american nightmare. There's so much peeping Tom ness involved. They're, like, watching. It needs to be taken very serious. Cause that does seem to be, like, the stepping stones towards something horrendous, I think.

Monica Padman
We think there's more just voyeurs than there are. They start out that way, but then they act on it eventually. I do think it's a stepping stone also. Oh, my God. Well, thank God you got out unscathed.

Madeline
It was definitely weird hearing about that after the fact, because it kind of validated my feelings of being scared in the past. And maybe you should trust your gut and not just think you're being paranoid. I could have easily called a non emergency line and be like, could you come check on me quick? I'm home alone, and I'm scared, and I didn't. Cause I always think I'm overreacting.

Dax Shepard
Yeah. What do you think? The impulse there is like, I don't want to be a baby. Yeah. I don't want to be a burden.

I definitely would do a similar thing. I think, like, ugh, you just gotta get over that. That was weird, but whatever. None of us can get in the mind of a person like this. But it is so telling that he wrote the names down and has them.

Monica Padman
That's part of the compulsion. Right? Because, you know if someone sees that, you'll get caught. It's a big outing. Anyone with logic would know not to do that.

But because it's part of this whole intertwined way of thinking, you make a crazy mistake like that, you have to write it down. Yeah, why would you? I'm sure he remembered the five. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

Dax Shepard
Yeah. It is very weird. It's like when the serial killers make the board with the strings. Well, they don't. The cops do that.

Monica Padman
Oh, first, sometimes the serial killers do that. I think on one of the movies. You're right. You're right. Yeah.

Thanks. Okay. Anyway, these things are giveaways, but they don't care. The compulsion's so strong. Ugh.

Melissa
Wow. Well, thank you for sharing that story. I'm sorry that that happened, and I am happy that you're okay. I appreciate it. Thank you for having me.

Madeline
I love you guys. Love Robbie Rob. Aw, he just smiled. I can see his profile. He's smiling pictures of Robbie Rob.

Yes. He's a cutie patootie. Oh, he's so cute, isn't he? Thank you. Oh, also, one more thing.

I love the variety of guests you get. I honestly think I started listening to this podcast probably, like, a year after you guys started just because I wanted to hear the celebrity conversations. Now I listen to it daily, and the things that I've learned, it's very exciting. So I appreciate you doing that variety. That makes me really happy.

Dax Shepard
We're inadvertently continuing our education, and then hopefully people are along for the ride. It's kind of like free college classes on Thursday. For real? That's amazing, Madeline. Well, good luck with everything, and thanks so much for telling us that story.

Madeline
Thank you. All right, bye bye, skilly Liz. These are all Liz baddies. Yeah, they are. Fake name.

Dax Shepard
I'm gonna call her Glenda. That's a good one. We haven't done a Glenda yet. Hi, can I call you Glenda?

Melissa
Of all the names you could have chosen, that's what you see me as? No, no, no. Keep going. Let's be very clear. Before we called you, I said, okay, she wants a fake name.

Dax Shepard
I'm gonna go with Glenda. This is not a reaction to your face. Okay. Also, Glenda is the beautiful witch. Is she?

Monica Padman
Yeah, Glenda, the beautiful good witch from wizard of Oz. Oh, I didn't know the name of the beautiful witch. Yeah, she's beautiful. Cause if I'm being honest and I looked at your face, what would you say? Monica, do you have a name?

Melissa. Melissa, yeah, that works. Okay, I can be Melissa. That's perfect. Okay, great.

Dax Shepard
So, Melissa, where are you? I am in the south of Italy. Whoa. I wasn't expecting that. Very exciting.

Melissa
I don't think you guys have ever had a caller from Italy. Actually, I think we had one student that was danish or scandinavian. Yeah. Someone was, like, studying there or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dax Shepard
Are you living there permanently? Yeah, I've been here for seven years. And is it a result of this story? No, I'm not, like, in witness protection or anything. I gotta temper how playful I'm being with this setup.

It's hard for me to know. That's perfectly fine. This is my challenge in these. With a prompt this potentially scary, which is like, what do you mean? I mean joyful.

And then you're like, my whole family was murdered. I'm like, oh, my God. Okay, I'm so sorry. I should have been really serious from the get go. Anyways, you're in Italy.

Are you employed? Yes, but of course with trying to keep things as anonymous as possible. But feel free to joke, okay. Because really, like, it's fine. But also, hence the reason I'm not in a closet, but rather in front of a wardrobe.

Melissa
Because we don't have closets here. Yes, and hence the reason why. I don't know if you can tell, but there is no sunlight coming in because it's almost 830 at night right now. Oh, okay. Now of the american amenities that one gives up when they move to Europe.

Dax Shepard
The thing that I've noticed is I don't think I've ever seen a refrigerator in Europe that was as big as the one that's in my motorhome. Fridges tend to be really small too. Usually they are because they don't refrigerate. As much as we. They get more fresh food.

Right. They shop more frequently. They have eggs on the counter and stuff. And here in Italy, specifically in the south, italian food is the only thing anyone cooks. My fridge is very different because, of course, I do cook still food from around the world.

Melissa
So sauces, that's not what they have in their refrigerator. It's all either fresh sauce that they made or sauces in the pantry. So the structure of the contents of our refrigerators are miles apart from Americans to Italians. I mean, they only cook italian food. That's it.

Dax Shepard
That's so fascinating. I would have never guessed that that was one of the explanations. Yeah. Is the enormous variety of food we cook here. Salad dressing doesn't exist here.

Yeah. That's half my fridge is salad dressing. You have to go to an international store to get all those things here. Okay, rob, right now we gotta do a refrigerator prompt. That's a joke.

Okay, let's talk stocking. Someone's like, I tuned in for stocking, and this became about refrigerators. Okay, so this all started in 2020. I bought a horse here, lifelong equestrian. And when I bought him, there were multiple other people who had bought horses at the same time who were very new to the sport and didn't know a lot.

Melissa
So I thought, well, I have all this information. I would love to share it with you. The welfare of the animal. I love that. So I started trying to help everyone and quickly came to the realization that they didn't really care.

So there was one person who would bring his horse to the barn, who was their friend, who had a genuine interest and a genuine care for it. Because of that, he and I became pretty good friends. Very much horse based friendship, but still pretty good friends. A horseshit. We had a horseshit.

So about two years into our friendship, he started dating another woman who would come to the barn just periodically to ride. And I knew her, and he really didn't know her. And when they started dating, I said, I would really suggest that you be careful, because I've known her for a year, and. And she's not really somebody who conducts herself in a way that says, I'm a stable person who can control my emotions. And I said, you know, she's kind of possessive and kind of manipulative and just be careful.

And he thought, no, no, she's straight. She's wonderful. Could we stereotype really quickly? Is there a subset of people drawn to horses that don't interact well with humans so they really enjoy that outlet of caring? I feel like a lot of shy people really like horses.

There's definitely a community that develops that I do try to stay away from. There's a lot of people who are like, I don't get along with people. I can't get along with people. And they tend toward animals. Dog show people tend to be the same.

And cat show people are the extreme of that. Yeah, we hate cats. Okay, well, slow down, slow down. A lot of valuable listeners that like cats. Well, mine is Taylor's cats, Meredith and Olivia.

Dax Shepard
Oh, Jesus Christ. Okay. Of course. So anyhow, so she started dating him, and as time went on, he started to kind of see the signs that I had warned him about. I'm, like, trying to keep my mouth shut for the most part, until it got to the point where she started to become extremely jealous of me and our friendship.

Okay, and quickly, let's call her Glenda. Cause you didn't like Glenda, and she needs a name, so let's just call her Glenda. Yeah, I was gonna say Karen. Oh, sure we can. Karen is already.

Monica Padman
I feel too on the nose. No, it's just like, Karen is already received a lot of heat. That name is a lot of heat. We should give some other names. Let's call her Glenda, even though that is a beautiful, good witch.

Melissa
So Glenda starts becoming extremely jealous of me because he is seeking out advice from me for things with his horse. She does not like the fact that we speak to each other because she's under the impression that because they're dating, we should have zero communication whatsoever. Regardless of the fact that we've been friends for two years prior to the two of them dating. She starts telling him, if I see her talk to you, I'm gonna beat the shit out of her. If I see them at the barn, I just stay away and I leave them alone.

Subsequently, I ended up leaving that barn and moving my horse to a different facility that was much better suited for him and away from any dramatic encounters. But I would still go there periodically for certain things. So this jealousy would continue to build and build and build. And it got to the point where she was so obsessive with him and so controlling of him that he finally, after one year, this is over. So the relationship ended.

The threats did not. She is continuously sending him text messages. She's showing up to his house. She's saying, I'm outside your house. Come and talk to me.

She's saying that this is all my fault, that I talked him into it. And there are text messages. There are vocal messages. As you know, in Europe, we love our vocal messages on WhatsApp. Okay, so she's sending him threatening vocal messages.

He's forwarding some of them to me and saying, like, I don't know what to do. I'm not sure how to handle this situation. And is she threatening him, you or herself? All three of us. During the time that they were in a relationship, she would say things like, you're the only thing that makes me happy.

You can never leave me. If you leave me, I'll kill myself. This is the nightmare of all nightmares. Absolutely. And even in the months that he wanted to end the relationship, he was saying, like, I'm so scared she's gonna do something to herself.

I wanna end it, but I can't because I don't want that weight on my chest if she does do something. So the threats come in the form of her saying that she's gonna come to my house, she's going to beat the shit out of me. She's gonna tell everybody that we know that I forced him to leave her. And then she wraps it up by saying to him, I will run you over with my car. I swear on my father that I will kill you.

Dax Shepard
Jesus.

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That wabi wab, you built that yourself using all the templates? Yeah, I sure did. Yeah. Easy peasy. So easy.

The best part about Squarespace is it's an all in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. You can get discovered fast with integrated, optimized SEO tools, and you can choose from professionally curated layouts and styling options with Squarespace blueprint. Plus, you can kick start or, or update written content on any website, product description or email with Squarespace AI, head to squarespace.com for a free trial and save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain with the code. Dax. We are supported by Taco Bell.

Monica Padman
Oh, man. We often do two recordings a day, and we have this little nice lunch break that we enjoy, and we're always craving something really yummy. Yes. Something fresh, something high quality. Something like the all new cantina chicken menu from Taco Bell, which is exactly that.

Mm. It's so yummy. It has slow roasted chicken, the pico, that purple cabbage, and an avocado verde salsa sauce. Oh, delicious. Outrageous.

Dax Shepard
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Monica Padman
This is restraining order time. But, yeah, how's that work in Italy? It's pretty similar to the states. Okay. As these things go on, I say, like, if she wants to come and talk to me, I will have a conversation with her.

Melissa
Tell her I will talk to her. If she's going to be irrational, I won't. But sure, I will try to put her mind at ease. So that sort of fades away. Now we're into, like, August September timeframe.

The messages and things have pretty much stopped. Here in Italy, we have what's called a parco, which is like a gated neighborhood. So my parco is very small, and just luckily, it's four houses of Americans. And so in your parco, you have this, like, big, tall fence around the entire perimeter, and then each house has, like, nine foot spiky fences with gates. Okay?

So to get in from the outside or to contact someone from the outside, there are buzzers that buzz your house. So the end of October 1 1430 in the morning, somebody just lays on the buzzer at my house, jump up, run outside. There's nobody there. It starts happening for about a week, buzzing my house, two in the morning, four in the morning. Oh, boy.

Ridiculous hours. And then they would buzz my neighbors as well. So my neighbors would run out. There'd be nobody there. Then on Halloween evening, I'm standing in my kitchen, and all of a sudden I hear this, like, explosion.

Dax Shepard
Oh. And I go out onto the balcony, and there's smoke coming up in my yard by my trampoline. And I'm like, oh, my God. Probably some, like, stupid kids because Halloween's gotten a bit more popular here. Americanized.

Melissa
Absolutely. Yeah. So it appears that someone coming down the road through this explosive over the fence. So I see the smoke coming up, but there's, like, no damage, no nothing. So I just think, okay, stupid kids.

So two days later, my son comes upstairs and he says, hey, the youngest of our two dogs is vomiting. And I'm like, okay, okay. She's like a perpetual puppy. I'm like, she probably ate snails from outside. He's like, okay, well, I put her out on the balcony to make sure that she doesn't puke in the house again.

He comes back upstairs, he's like, I think she's cold now. This is the beginning of November. Oh, God. In the south of Italy, it's not cold at all. I'm like, okay, okay.

I'll come check on her. I go downstairs. She is just profusely drooling. And when I look out on the balcony, there are piles of vomit, and it's just hot dogs. Oh, what?

And as much as we are american, we do not buy hot dogs. And I immediately think somebody threw hot dogs over the fence and poisoned my dog. Of course. That's what I would think. And I race off to the emergency vet.

They take her in. They're trying to pump her full of meds. They don't know what she's been poisoned with. They end up having to intubate her because she is not able to breathe. And within ten minutes, she's dead.

Dax Shepard
Oh, my God. This was not something we were supposed to laugh and make. Joe, this is horrible. We're gonna give a warning. Rob, make a note.

We gotta give a warning anytime. Animals die in these episodes. I hear about it in the comments. So we're supposed to warn everything about that. It gets better or worse, depending on how you really want to look at it.

Okay? She's gone. We are devastated. I end up bringing her home to bury her. I'm talking to my friends, and I'm saying, I don't understand.

Melissa
Talking to the police, they said, this sounds like they took out your dog in an attempt to be able to rob you. So be very careful, very diligent. You're not jumping to Glenda at this. Point, I'm not jumping to anyone. And I'm saying, I have no idea who would do this?

Who would want to do this? I don't have a clue. At this point, I'm not seeing any connection between these two. So we're very, very careful in the coming days to make sure that everything is locked. Then, for three weeks, nothing happens.

Three weeks to the day after our dog was poisoned and killed, I'm lying in bed, and I'm falling asleep, and I'm listening to a podcast as I'm falling asleep. Oh, my God. Ding, ding, ding. It was your podcast. It was the yearbook.

The yearbook episodes. As I'm falling asleep, I have my phone in my hand still, and I get this enormous thud into my chest at the same time that I see a big flash of light outside of my glass doors of my bedroom and the loudest explosion that I could have imagined. And when I look outside, there is this mushroom cloud that shoots up past my third story bedroom, past my terrace, which is four stories high. Whoa. It's like if you've ever been near when, like, a fighter jet flies by and you get the sound barrier when they burn, hits you in the chest.

That's what it was like. I call the police. The police come. They're like, there's just a bunch of paper shrapnel. Yes, we can see exactly where it blew up.

Your driveway is dented. But do you know who could have done this? And then they say, this seems really personal. This doesn't seem like someone is trying to break into your house because they're just scaring you at this point. Yes.

They said, there's not really much we can do about it. I am terrified, of course. And I'm talking to my friends about it. And my friend that I know from the barn, we call him Jake. When my dog died and when this happened, he's being so sweet.

He's like, whatever you need, let me help you. So I end up going to the police, and I end up filing a police report. So all of this is documented. And when I'm there, they say, has anyone threatened you? And I say, well, there is this one woman, Glenda, and it's my friend Jake's ex girlfriend.

And these are the things that she said. And here have been all the problems. And so they say, okay, we want to talk to him. So I call him, and he comes in, and he gets a statement, and he's resistant. He's like, I don't really want to be a part of this.

I don't think that she did this. Yes, she's crazy, but I don't think she's violent. And I'm thinking, well, who else could it be? So we filed a police report. And then within a couple of days, Jake and I start receiving calls from a blocked number at all hours of the day and the night.

And it if either of us answer, there's never anybody on the other end of the phone. Most of the time, I'm not answering, but they're calling it 2345 in the morning. And all throughout the day, I end up going to get my nails done. And I had gotten two calls. And the girl who does my nails, obviously she knows the story because, you know, she's my nail girl.

And she says, you know, there's an app you can download that. If you get the phone call and you refuse the phone call, the app will tell you the full phone number of who it was. And if that person is in your phone, it'll show up with the name. So I download the app, and I wait two days, and I'm getting ready. In the morning, I'm getting ready to go to the barn.

My phone rings, and it says, private call. And I immediately start shaking. And when Jake and I have had the conversations about these phone calls, we've kind of gone back and forth between who could be doing this. But ultimately, it makes the most sense that the person who threw the explosives, the person who poisoned my dog, the person who is ringing the bells, it's all probably the same person. So now that I have the potential to know who this is, I am just, like, shaking.

So my phone is ringing. I refuse to call, and I have Glenda's phone number saved in my phone. So I refresh the app, and it says, anonymous call from Jake. Oh, my God. What a twist.

Monica Padman
What a twist. No, no. Yes.

I have chills. I have chills again right now. Yeah. Ew. What the fuck?

Melissa
Never in my life have I been so out of control of my own body. Oh, my. Oh, my God. And my phone rings again, and it's a private number, and I wait for it to ring twice, and I refuse to call. And I go back to the app, anonymous call from Jake, and I just lose it.

I just start crying because this is someone who I have been very close to for the past three and a half years. I know his family. I've been to his home I've helped him hundreds of hours with his horse. Like, we've spent an enormous amount of time together. And through this entire process of all these things happening, he's consoling you.

Monica Padman
Yeah. This is very twisted. When I got a security camera here, I showed him the footage on my phone and was like, look, this is amazing. It's so clear. This is everything I can see.

Dax Shepard
So he's got all the intel. I call a friend of mine, and I am crying so hard, I can hardly tell her what's happening. And while we're on the phone, I get another call. Private number. Do the same thing.

Melissa
Go to the app. But this time, it says Jake's work phone. He has a cell that was issued to him for his job. Wait, sorry. So you said that you and him were receiving private calls.

Monica Padman
So was he just saying, I'm getting private calls, too? So he's using his work issued cell phone to call his private phone in order to make it look. Oh, because he's sending me screenshots. Yeah. He also could just register his work phone and his contacts as Glenda and then send crazy texts from Glenda to his normal phone screen.

Dax Shepard
Grab it. Yeah. He was Glenda on his work phone. He wasn't. She was legitimately crazy.

Monica Padman
Oh, okay. Oh, wow. There's a lot going on. So when I am on the phone and I get this other phone call, and I see that it's his work phone, it clicks. Every time that he has sent me a screenshot of calls from a private number that he's received, he's done it himself.

Call came from inside the house. I can't believe you just said that, because that is the exact same thing that I repeated every time I told the story. It's like. It's like in the movie when the 911 operator is like, calls are coming from inside the house. That's how I felt.

Melissa
So all while I'm on the phone with my friend, he sends me a message of a screenshot and says, hey, I just received two more calls, but I think I heard a familiar voice. So call me back so we can talk about it. So I have to pretend like everything's fine. Cause I want to gather as much information as possible, because so far, I have three phone calls from him. I have no evidence.

I call him back, and he sort of hems and ha's about, like, oh, well, it wasn't really a voice. It was, like, a noise. And I think it was from the original barn. And I'm like, you think someone's calling that's at the barn. And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think so.

I don't think it's Glenda. So I get off the phone. The next day, I am just reeling through this rolodex of memories, of things that have happened, and one of those important elements is that months prior, he had told me, hey, I started dating Glenda because I am in love with you, and I know that we can't be together. And I tried to distract myself by being with her, but it didn't work. And now I want to be with you.

And I said, that's not an option. Yeah. Yes. Also, Glenda's not as crazy anymore. Cause she knew he was in love with her.

Yes. Well, she is crazy. She's gonna kill herself. Also, I'm gonna kill you. The degree she took it, too, was crazy.

But she wasn't wrong in her insecurities. Yeah. Yep. Oof. So when I said, like, no, it's not gonna happen, he kind of tried to plead with me a bit, and I said, absolutely not.

We need to take some time apart. So then he came back and said, I'm really sorry. We can be friends. But there would be times throughout that where he would have little streaks of jealousy or, like, question, oh, what did you do last night? Oh, where were you?

Madeline
Oh. Or who with? So as I'm thinking back to all of these circumstances, I started to realize that there were a couple of different times where I would be somewhere locally, and I wouldn't think anything of it because I'm somewhere locally. But he would show up. There was one time we were at a place, and I was getting gelato for my kids, and I saw his car go through, like, two rows of cars in the parking lot.

Melissa
And I was like, oh, my gosh, it's Jake. I'm gonna give him a call. And I call and say, like, hey, I just saw your car. I'm here with my kids. Why don't you come and get something to drink with us?

Because we're friends. So when I start thinking back to all of these things, I remember this time where I had gone a couple hours north with a friend, and I had said, I'm going to this place. This is our destination. And then the thing that I posted on Facebook was at a different destination, and he asked me about a third destination that I did go to, but I never mentioned it. I didn't mention it, only purely for the fact that it was uneventful.

We went there, nothing was open for lunch, and we left and when I asked him, I said, wait, how did you know I went there? And he said, oh, you told me. And I was like, no, I didn't, because I didn't tell anybody because it wasn't noteworthy. And he said, you put the location on Facebook. So then when all this happens, I'm thinking back, I go check my Facebook page.

I never put a location. So that day. So it's the day after the phone calls. I go to my local mechanic here, because Jake is also a mechanic and has worked in my car before, but I have one here close to my house. So I go to my mechanic.

I said, will you please put my car on the lift? And will you please check and see if someone has attached a tracking device to my car? I lift it up, search the car, under it, in the grill, inside the car. They're like, we found nothing. And the owner looks at me, and he says, I can see that you're really scared.

And he turned around to his other mechanic, and he said, tear her car apart. Oh, good. So they go back into my car. They start taking off door panels, under the dashboard. They start ripping everything apart.

And in about ten minutes, they say, we found it. Where was it? It was underneath the dash, behind the stereo, up inside, hidden crash. Whoa. Hardwired to my car, meaning that my battery is powering this gps track.

Dax Shepard
Oh, my God. Wow, wow, wow, wow. I found it. Well, they found it in mid February. That trip that I took with a friend of mine was the beginning of September, so it's been in my car five months minimum.

Melissa
Of course, I, like, lose it, start crying, freaking out, and realize that not only has he been the one who has been calling me, but he most likely is the one who threw explosives in my yard. Of course he did it all. Was constantly doing all of this stuff to try and be the hero in my life. Yes, I take the tracker, I take the phone calls. I take everything.

I go to the police. And so I end up having to file a report against him. Recently, the laws have changed in Italy, fantastically so, to protect women to a much greater degree. When I do this, I end up getting in touch with a penal lawyer, criminal lawyer, because I want to know what the next steps are. And he says, the tracker and the phone calls are stalking and harassment.

Those are the equivalent of a felony in the States. All my paperwork is stamped Codicio Rosso, which is code red. He said, it's extremely serious. This will ruin his life. Everything will be taken from him.

And I said, okay. And he said, but there's a problem. He won't go to jail. So there's nothing more dangerous than a crazy person who has nothing to lose. So if you ruin his life and he has nothing left to hold on to, and he still knows where you live, and he knows where your horse is and he knows where your children are, he can walk through a piece of paper as far as like, a restraining order goes.

So he said there is one alternative thing that you can do, which is to use what you have and leverage it against him. So essentially what you will do is you will keep the tracker, you will cancel your police report, you will go have a conversation with him, and you will say, I have ABCD and E. The offer is you never speak to me again in any form. So basically that's exactly what I did, is I had to man up, in a sense, and I had to go meet him. And I had my sister in my headphones the whole time, had like, my live location on for like three other people, and I had to go meet him and say, this is the situation.

I am going to keep all this evidence against you. If another thing ever happens at my house, I will take everything to the police and you are finished. Wow. What was his reaction when he knew you knew all this? He didn't believe that I filed a police report.

He didn't believe that I had evidence. He denied everything once he agreed to it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

The next day, I go cancel the police report. I sent him a message. It's canceled. Everything is finished. It's done.

Goodbye. A couple hours later, I get a photo from him from the stairs of his house and a police car in his driveway. Apparently, the headquarters office did not talk to the local office closest to his house in time. And they, because it was a code red, they deployed officers to his house, removed his family from the house and searched his house and found eleven rifles and multiple large cardboard boxes of ammunition. Oh, boy.

And here in Italy, there's extremely strict gun laws. Like, you can have a hunting rifle, but I'm pretty sure you can't have eleven. Yeah. And I just said, here's the headquarters that I went to. They can contact them and find.

I canceled the report. None of this is on me. He said, they know. Now these are my problems. Like, you don't have to worry about it.

And we have never spoken since. Whoa. Did he go to jail? No. No.

Monica Padman
Ugh. I don't even care what happens with the guns, with the legality of it. I don't even care. I would like to say living in peace, but this was two months ago. Oh, my God.

Melissa
So I'm still, like, a little on edge. Not 100% calm and serene quite yet. Wow, that is. That is bonkers. I hate to wrap up so quick, but we are 45 minutes behind with these other folks.

Dax Shepard
Holy smokes, Melissa. What a crazy fucking story. That's one of the twisties. Bonkers stories. That's a dateline.

Totally. I started therapy, actually, after this happened. I bet they're supposed to remain neutral. She could not. And she was like, this is a Netflix documentary.

Melissa
Yeah, this is a Dateline story. And, like. Yeah, I know. And I just loved it. Oh, my God.

Monica Padman
Really? Sorry. Keep going to therapy because this is. A lot to get lots of cameras and be safe. Oh, my gosh.

Melissa
Well, I know you guys have to go, but love the show. So happy that I got to be on it. All right. So nice to meet you. Yeah.

Dax Shepard
Thank you. Bye.

Monica Padman
Yeah. Big payoff. Mm hmm. That can be, like, a standalone episode. Hi.

It's miniature mouse. It was right around here that we decided to break this episode up into two parts. So what you just heard was stalking part one, and next week, we will resume with stalking part two. So watch your back, and we'll see you next week. Do you want to sing a tune or something?

Dax Shepard
When I'm a theme song? Oh, okay, great. Have a theming song for this new show. So here I go. Go.

We're gonna ask some random questions, and with the help of arm cherries, we'll get some suggestions on the fly rhyme dish, on the fire rind dish. Enjoy.