Elbows & Assholes w/ SuChin Pak & Kulap Vilaysack

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Lacey Moseley
Scam, robbery and fraud. Scam robbery scam goddess. What's poppin, congregation? It's your girl, Lacey Moseley, aka scam goddess. Back with another installment of the podcast all about robbery, fraud and those who practice it.

Sometimes we love them. Sometimes we hate them. We'll see. And when we get on the ride, y'all put your hands up. We're going up.

Y'all like my new voice? I've been taking voice lessons. Is it less grading? We'll see how long I can maintain this. Okay, shout out to Taylor.

But congregation, y'all know I'm. What? Yes. I'm very excited, thrilled, elated. We have two guests in the building for y'all today.

Double the pleasure, double the fun. I know that's right. Amazing guests. One is an iconic veteran journalist, and the other is a talented actor, comedian, writer, everything under the sun. Together, they host the podcast add to cart, where they talk about the things we buy, the things we buy into, and what that says about who we are.

Check it out anywhere you get your podcast. Congregation, please welcome Suchin park and Culap Vilasak. Hi. Oh, wow. Feels so good.

Kulap Vilaysack
I feel so at home here. This is a subject matter I'm very committed to through my mother. Ooh, through your mother. Okay. We love a generational scam moment.

Lacey Moseley
Yes, a scamily, if you will. Yes, we are a scammily. Like a giant tree. Yes. Me and my family are scammlies as well.

Kulap Vilaysack
Okay. My mom recently divulged to me that I was on the. She called me. Cause she was like, hey, this man called me from Amazon, and he was talking about your Amazon, or my Amazon has been compromised. And I was like, this is a scam.

Lacey Moseley
So I guess she just started talking to him. And then she was like, then he brought your name up, and I was like, how you know my baby name? And so she was like, I was just calling you just in case. But she was like, Amazon would never call me. I could never get in contact with them at all.

And this led to her telling me something she's never told me before, which was that she got scammed before. Like, Internet scams got really hot. Someone got her password and then made an ancestry.com profile. They made a profile at one of those game sites where you can buy online video games. And just like, all this petty shit, I guess they got, like, opened an account at one of those putt putt places, which I didn't know they had putt putt accounts.

Kulap Vilaysack
I feel like, I mean, this is so wide. It's so wide and the net so far. How you using my mama money for your activities, for your hobbies, for your recreation. Right? And so she told me that she figured out how to change the password back on ancestry.

Lacey Moseley
But this was back in the day when if you had a, like an email account or something, you know how if you log in from somewhere else, it automatically logs you out from wherever else your email was logged on to say, like another computer? Yeah. So this back in the day, that didn't happen. So she said she got the password when she changed it back from ancestry and it was the same password for his email account. Then she went to his email account and she found where he worked.

He worked at a bank, and that's how he had gotten her information. She emailed the bank, threatened to call the FDIC. Then she got real petty and started reading his emails. Figured out he was cheating on his fiance, sent a blast to his family. Whoa.

And friends. A whole contact list saying, this man is stealing money from innocent people. And also, if you are, let's call it Jennifer. If you're Jennifer, he is cheating on you with another woman. And I got it right here in the emails.

She went after this man's life. I was like, please don't fuck with my mom. So that's not how. My mom is a victim. Like, your mom is a crusader.

Kulap Vilaysack
This is a different. My mom thinks she's scamming the scammers. That's how. Like, she doesn't. She doesn't get it.

Your mom is a vigilante. That's different. She soon started getting fun to her. No, you're. I was like, mom is the punisher.

Like, that's not what Pat B. Lysock's up to. Don't fuck with Lori. Oh, no, y'all, that's the t shirt. Don't fuck with Lori.

Lacey Moseley
Don't fuck with Lori. That's about to be my new merge. Yeah. So I come from that side of scammer mothers. But what's your relationship with scams and your mother?

Kulap Vilaysack
First of all, I'm interested understand that my mom is a she. Let's. I don't know for a fact. I wanna say former gambler. Okay.

But I have removed myself from that situation. That's none of your business. That's girlfriend. None of my business. Now, has she in the past opened Macy's accounts in my name?

Cause she knows my Social Security. Yes, she has. Have I asked her to not do that again? And I think, no, I know that she stopped doing that. But she was always the breadwinner.

But she was also the gambler, so she was always moving money. Moving money. Everybody's moving around. Oh, yeah. She took money from my dad's 401K.

Like, she did lots of things. They're divorced. That sounds like she was a scamming. She don't sound like a victim. That's what.

Okay, that's fair. But she thinks she's like. So there's an element of a gambler that thinks that they're gaming the system. Gaming the system. They think that they'll win and not the house.

And she's wreaked havoc. And it's still. There's still. We're fine now. But, like, there was a lot.

Lacey Moseley
There was a lot. And the most recent scam was, and Sujin's heard this many a time was perhaps three years ago on around Christmas. It came to a head where she fell for a Facebook scam. Oh. Through, like, a supposed friend of a friend told her that she.

Kulap Vilaysack
She won money. She won money. And all she needed to do was be connected to this place that gives you money, like a lottery. But she needed to pay to get that money. And through gift cards from target.

Lacey Moseley
Oh, not the photos. Oh, the gift cards. Oh, we've seen it so many times. Four grand. Four grand.

Kulap Vilaysack
Four grand in target gift cards. Now, listen, you can go into target and try to get a roll of toothpaste and leave spending four grand. That's very popular. But that's in the store. A roll of toothpaste.

Lacey Moseley
Child, what age am I? But like a roll of toothpaste. You know, a roll of toothpaste. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're all switching.

You agree? Yeah, a roll of toothpaste. That's how we all say. Everybody says that. Everybody says that.

Remember it like that, y'all. I'm gaslighting you now. But no, but to buy the gift cards. And then they always make you flip it over, scratch off the little metal part, and then take a picture so that they can immediately extract the money off the card. Oh, God.

Kulap Vilaysack
But. And they would text her and be like, just a little bit more, and then, we're gonna drop off the money. Now, I had to see these texts, which I'm certain were from overseas. Certain positives, spelling errors. Feel good.

Yeah, there was the times that. But she was actively engaging. Cause she's also lonely. She's also lonely. Pull up why you're not calling your mama.

Lacey Moseley
We talk about this all the time. You got to call. I know. She opened up account. The Macy's account.

I feel like I told you why. You did. You did. Boundaries. I feel like you might call your mom.

And she was like, yeah, baby. What's your new favorite car these days? What's your favorite pet name these days? My maiden name.

What's your favorite numbers, baby? Yeah. What was the street that you grew up on? No. Yeah, I saw you on that tv show, and I just kept thinking, what is my baby's favorite fruit?

That's the first, and I'll keep it. A car that you bought, make and model. Yeah. Now, Lacey, the aggression and passive aggression of these texts and their proof of, like, here's your money, is like a stock photo of a briefcase filled with cash. We are wanting to drop this off.

Kulap Vilaysack
And she's like, well, I'm at my daughter's. Here's her address. Uh uh. That's your address. Now, she said, pull up the cool op crib.

Lacey Moseley
No. And even when we walked her through that this was a scam, she didn't believe it. Even. I was like, okay, you won't believe your daughters. Scott.

Kulap Vilaysack
White husband. White husband talked to her, and it seemed like he got through to her. I was about to say, white husband reinforcements might do it. It might. It might.

And we were like, yes, she gets it. She, like, nodded her head. Still texting. It took for so long for them to take over her Facebook and Instagram. No.

Lock her out. And then start to reach out to family members and other people for her. To go, oh, I'm not getting this money. Yeah. And she ruined.

And this is, you know, this is true crime, but it's also. There's. At least she's funny. And I don't know if everybody knows. This is her background.

This is comedy, but ruined her relationship with my sister, and they have not spoken since. Anywho. Damn, we get real here sometimes. Yes, Emily. Yes, Emily.

Lacey Moseley
We ask family. I don't talk to my mama. Cause you got that car that Macy's. Yes. No.

Okay, see, I hate that for your mom. Cause sometimes it is hard once you get in so deep. We talk about sunk costs, you know, in the economic sense, but also in the personal sense of, like, once you put money into something, that money is gone. So now if you throw more money after it, you're just throwing good money after bad. So cut your losses.

Start thinking about sunk costs differently. Think about, like, oh, at least I didn't spend any more money and move on with that thought. Versus, like, thinking about how much you spent and trying to recoup it. That money gone, baby. And I hate that your mom was like, no, I could turn this around.

And that's also, you know, like, a methodic gambler does think that, like, I can turn this around. I can still game the system. But everybody knows the way to win at gambling is to leave. I tell people all the time. I go to the casino, I make my ring, I make thousands of dollars on a craps table, and then I leave.

I stay for an hour and then I leave. Cause, like, statistically, you'll get hot for 15 minutes in an hour. You just have to have enough money to play. When you get hot, you bet big, and then as soon as that, you know, seven comes, you cash out, you dip. That's the only way to win.

There's no other way. You're not gonna be hot for hours. Statistically, it just does not happen. Macy's is gonna win. So she thought she could get hot again.

She's like, no, no, no, I'm gonna get hot again. Hand me that Macy's car cooler. That's right, that's right. Don't look at the name. It's not yours.

Kulap Vilaysack
Uh, no. Trust that. She. She'd go to Mystic Lake and everybody knew her name. She was like, norm at those blackjack tables.

Like, she, you know. Oh, she's a blackjack player. Oh, she. For real? For real.

Lacey Moseley
My mom's a blackjack player. Listen, that's. That we're aficionados. That makes my blood race. I like to have money out everywhere, you know?

Look here, little there, little on the eight, little on the six, little on hard four. That's my momma. But not on. Yeah. Cars.

Who? 21? No, ma'am, but. Okay. I hope your sister or your mom can reconcile at some point.

But I do understand your sister's pain because that is a lot. That's a lot. But somebody call cool at mama so she'll stop talking to them scammers. Please, please. So, sushin, what is your relationship with scams?

Love em, hate em. Never been scammed. I was thinking about this question a lot, and I personally am. I wouldn't say scam proof. Ooh.

SuChin Pak
I'm pretty close, because as we talk off, Mike, I am the cheapest person you'll ever meet. So anytime there's a dollar sign, even if it is for real, I'm still taking weeks to consider it. But I come from an immigrant family, which often is also a family that has been scammed at some point. Oh, for sure. And I come from a scamily of folks that have been scammed and have been scammers, but maybe unknowingly, you know, lots of pyramid schemes in my family growing up.

Vacuum cleaners could. Anything. Could be a pyramid. We talking door to door vac. We talking door to door door vacs.

Very expensive vacs. Payment plan vacs. I had some of that.

Even in korean immigrant culture here in this country, they have this thing called the get. And the get is when a bunch of korean immigrants who want to own businesses get together, and every month, they put money in the pot, and everyone around the group, in turn gets a chance to get the pot in full to make a down payment on a restaurant or a dry cleaners or a small business. Right. And that's how kind of it works when it works. But inevitably, every season, someone walks off with the entire pot and doesn't come.

Lacey Moseley
Back and yet decide who gets the pot. We having, like, a duel? We have. Well, it goes around proposals. Sounds to me there's a bunch of.

SuChin Pak
Lazy that I don't know, a bunch of lazies. Everyone, when they win, they turn into a lacey, and they walk away. Listen, I would make my business. I would make my business that I said I was gonna make, okay? The business is me.

Lacey Moseley
Okay? Me, LLC. Okay. And it's gonna be a great running Neiman Marcus, LLC. Yeah.

SuChin Pak
So, you know, I think that's maybe partly why culp, like, we always joke that I feel like everything is a scam all the time. I constantly feel like I'm being scammed, but maybe because I grew up in this environment of watching the adults in my life constantly being scammed, that I have this, like, burned fear of my money walking away with someone who walked off with the pot, didn't open a business, and was never heard from again. Well, she thinks eye cream's a scam, and that is a known belief to some, but then she'll put hand cream on her eyes and things will go awry, you know? So it's interesting, you know, it's. You gotta play the odds.

You gotta play the odds. It's almost like a menthol based hand cream. What kind of. Yeah, it's a long game. Yeah.

Sometimes they put things in hand creams that shouldn't be near the eyes, but, you know. Well, it's in the name. I just wanna call it out. It's called a hand cream. Yeah, they did say for the hand.

Lacey Moseley
For the hand. The name is pretty clear. And I will say most eye creams, even the ones that say eyeball on them, do burn my under eye. Oh, they do? Yeah.

And I was talking to my esthetician about this. Cause I have weird. I don't know. I guess I have very high tolerance for pain. And I was like, yeah, it'd be stinging sometimes.

That's the cost of beauty. She was like, no, it should not. Nothing on your face should burn. I was like, for real? Cause it be burning.

I just thought I was getting younger. What you mean? So cool. I might've been there rubbing that hand cream on my eye for. I probably did it at least for a week.

I tried it for a week. I can't see really well, but I don't know if it's cause my eye vision is blurry. But it does look like less lines, because it does. It does. So maybe it works.

Kulap Vilaysack
Is it my vision or is it my skin? Hard to say. Hard to say. You tell me. You're only reiterating my belief in these scams.

SuChin Pak
Once again, I've come back squarely to where I started, which is how I like to end conversations. So it's just like, I've learned nothing. Yes, I've learned nothing. I'm still right. Let's move on.

Kulap Vilaysack
My behavior will not change. Oh, I love that. That is a perfect. I've learned that I'm still right. Are you a Taurus?

Lacey Moseley
Your birthday coming up. Nope, that's over here. We had one. We had one that's over here now. I'm like, ooh, what could it be?

Kulap Vilaysack
She's a Leo. Oh, I was about to say Leo. That was gonna be my second guess. That was gonna be my second guess. Luca.

Lacey Moseley
That was definitely gonna be my second guess was Leo. My mother's a Leo. She was like, yeah. See how I was right even when I wasn't? I'm like, yes, mom, I do.

I see how it's on the block. And then you somehow were right the whole time. No, I get it. I remember it different. Okay.

Roll a toothpaste. I remember it different. We all say that. Yes. Scams.

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Cut. All right, well, it's time to get in our first segment here, what's hot and fraud? This is where we warn our listeners about popping scams in the zeitgeist. Or more often than not, we get a letter from you all out there. As always, snitch on your friends, family, and your enemies at scamgottedspot@gmail.com.

Dot. Just make sure the scam is what? Yes, retired. Because we don't. Yes.

Wanna fuck up your bag? Oh, see, I skipped it. I switched it up there on y'all. Did y'all get all that? Let's see.

So collab switchin. I need a fake name for this person. We don't care about gender here, so it could be anything. Just a fake name. Jennifer.

Jennifer. Yes. Jennifer's body of scams. That came quick. I like it.

So Jennifer says, hi, Lacey. My husband and I just bought a car. Okay. Husband. Okay.

Just purchased a car. Okay. You living good? Okay, Jennifer, we see you a hobby car that starts but doesn't drive a hobby car. Oh, so this isn't even a car that you plan.

Kulap Vilaysack
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Car. Something for, like, you know, usually it's a guy to tinker with. Like, he has, like, a car that he tinkers and mods and, you know. Jennifer, y'all got a driveway, huh?

SuChin Pak
I still don't understand. You got a garage. So switching, like, a hobby car is like, a car that's like a fixer upper. So it's, like, something for the man to, like. It's a project.

Kulap Vilaysack
It's crafting for him. But will it also be a woman out there working underneath the. Changing the oil and, you know, getting the carburetor. Carburetting. That's right.

SuChin Pak
Okay. All right. And in the hopes that eventually they will be able to drive the car or this is just. Okay. Got it.

Lacey Moseley
Okay. They'll be able to take, like, a trip in it, you know? It's an old jalopy. Why do they call it a hobby car? That's not what they sound like.

Some elder millennial shit. That's what it sounds like. A hobby car. Well, because there. That's a positive spin.

Kulap Vilaysack
It's not a jalopy. Because usually a jalopy is something that a poor person is trying to make do with. This is somebody who has the means, who. It's like, I'm gonna change the engine and I'm going to. It's a renovation.

It's a car renovation that they can afford. Okay. Got it. Okay. Yeah.

Lacey Moseley
It's like, if you buy a house and they call it a fixer upper, then it's like you're gonna spend your time fixing it. Upper er. So Jennifer says, I have aaa, and I thought I'd call them to tow it, since I paid for a premium membership. I know. That's right.

Get your money's worth. Call your triple a and have them. So the tow truck pulls up, right? This middle aged man has a rosary bead cross necklace on prominently displayed over the collar of his safety yellow companion, Polo. So he's telling the girls, I'm with Jesus.

And he wants you to know he's got the Jesus drip. Like. Just like a large cross, rosary, all the bees. He say a little prayer right before you get out the car. He wants you to know that he with God and of God.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah. He is on God's team. Yes. I came here. God sent me to tow y'all's car.

Lacey Moseley
So he gets out and he got all his Jesus drip. He says, we have a problem. AAA policy says they can't tow unregistered cars. He apologizes. I say, no problem.

That ain't no problem. I didn't know the policy and understand, he doesn't make the rules. Now, I wanna pause right here, because I have used Triple A, and at no point did they ask me to pull out a pink slit. I've used other towing companies. They'd be like, where is the car?

Okay, right here. I will hook my things to it. Sign here. Give me money. That has been the whole transaction.

They've never been like, license and registration. This ain't no cop. Pull over. What you talking about? She led with it.

He led with it. Yeah. That means. No, that Jennifer led with it. I bet.

Kulap Vilaysack
I think Jennifer led because she. Cause where would that come from? Jennifer, probably. And her husband said, hey, we just got this car. Cause she gave that information.

Lacey Moseley
So she put herself right into the scam. That's what I did. Honestly, I'm on triple A man's side right now because he said the scam showed itself to me. The opportunity called me, the door was opened. Yeah.

Cause you told him, don't tell people things they don't need to know. Tell people as little as they need to know as possible, constantly. Okay. You don't need to tell people things. So Jennifer says, that ain't no problem.

That ain't no problem. I didn't know the policy. And I understand he doesn't make the rules. He tells us that if we wanted to have this car towed, we could call a local towing company and they charge around 125 to show up and then five to $10 per mile towed. He pauses to allow us to consider this.

Now, you just know the tow race off the top of your head, Mister Aaa. Because I don't. And typically when you pay for towing, like once, if it's within a certain mileage range, you're just paying a flat fee. I've never heard of the extra mile tower, like. No, they give you a fee on the phone from where to where?

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah. I mean, but he's in very strange. He's in the tow business guy. Yeah. And the tower, he's like, God told me to tell y'all it's gonna be real expensive.

Lacey Moseley
Those are God's rates. No, sometimes it's more believable when there's a lot of information that's true, when there's details. And it's just like a. One of these. Yep.

And people bombard you with facts. I always tell people, if someone tells you a story and there's way too many details that are unnecessary, they're lying to you. Yeah. It's like if you're late and they're like, oh, yeah, I'm sorry I was late. It was a car accident right in front of me.

I was actually passing ExxonMobil and I needed some gas, but I ain't even stopped because I was like, no, I don't really got time. And then I was eating a cheese sandwich and got some cheese on my car a little bit. And anyways, there was this old lady down there, right? It's like, what? All of this is not necessary to tell me the one sentence.

So, yes, he's bombarding. Like you said, sutin. Bombarding with facts. I see. Such.

And that's why you don't be getting scammed, honey. She said, okay. Yeah. So the bombardment with the facts, right? He pauses to allow us to consider that.

So he's like, hmm, let me see if it worked. Let me give him a chance to think. Not too long, but just a little chance to think about it. He's a closer. I can tell.

Then he says, wiggles the bait. If we wanted, we could make a donation to his church, and he could tow the car to our house. What a light touch. What a light, light touch. So he's like, here's your options.

They gonna charge y'all millions of dollars to tow it, or if y'all love God, like I clearly do with my God necklace, maybe. I don't know. I'm just thinking off the top of my head. I towed over there for a nominal fee. What y'all think?

For God? Yeah. Wow. Wow. For the church.

Towing tithes. That's a new way to get your tithes. Wow up there. Okay. Now, I will say I just been giving tithes in the church.

So I'm like, at least I get a service with this one. It's going to God. And I got interesting. Okay. Amen.

Yeah. Okay. That's interesting. That's an interesting thought. Everybody wins, okay?

Kulap Vilaysack
It's like a benefit. Yes. God wins. I win. You know our hobby club gala?

Got it. Right now I'm at a benefit gala. I just need my car towed. And now I'm buying a dollar 100 plate. Love it.

SuChin Pak
Wait, I wanna take the temperature of the room. Do you guys know where this is going at this point? Yeah. Yeah. Really?

Lacey Moseley
I'm. Wow. I'm really. I don't know what is happening. I don't know where this is going.

See, I love that. I love that for you. And maybe I'm wrong. Cause sometimes I like to skim these just to be surprised with you all. So we'll see.

So, you know he offers the donation for the church. Jennifer says. I said, of course. What's a typical donation that your church receives? He says that's up to those who donate.

And that he never says the m word because he. I'm sorry. He never says the m word, which I'm assuming is money because he would lose his job for violating AAA policy. So. He didn't say donation.

He didn't say money. He said, give me some money and I'll do it. He said, give me a donation to my church. Because if I say the m word, then aaa gonna know I'm skimming off the top. Okay.

Kulap Vilaysack
He's related to a lawyer, right? He said, now, if I say the money word, then now, this is a crime. Y'all feel me? Y'all feel me? So donation to the church.

SuChin Pak
Lot of fun with this. This is just really, don't you feel like this character that he's building, this world, this world we've stepped into is. Rich, and it feels unnecessary and color so unnecessary. There is no way there's AAAA policy saying you can say donation. No, no, no.

You can't say money. And is AAA listening to you? Are they big brother? Can they hear you? Like, what are you talking about?

Lacey Moseley
I don't think they can hear our conversation right now, my guy. But, okay, now he's trying to make them feel like they're spies. He's like, all right, now leave the money under the tire. Like, what? I'm sorry, you're standing right here.

Let me just put in your hand. So Jennifer says, I said, I understand. I am a very charitable person, and I'd be happy to make a donation to his church. He paused for a moment and then verified our address and said that he'd see us there. Okay, Jennifer, you really in on this?

He said, I also love charity. I give to those in need constantly. That's what Jennifer said. Also, I love that we don't have a name of this church. And it's not like it was left out here, you know, for anonymity.

We're just like a church, a church, a church. Last time I checked, three people. All you need for a church, right? Like, we all in the room together praising the Lord. God didn't say nothing about no LLC.

He didn't say nothing about tax write off. I mean, the thing is, is like, first of all, I think this right off the bat, I don't believe this is there is a church. But you know what I mean? There's so many ways that a person can make things work for them and have logic, and he's like, yeah, you know, me going to church, this helps pay for me to go to church. I mean, there's just so many different ways that you can con.

Kulap Vilaysack
You know what I mean? To me, it's like, it's the same as putting on, like, a fake badge and trying to get something. That's what I think this is going. I think you're right. Also, there's a good point here.

Lacey Moseley
Cause I guess if he had pulled up and been like, oh, you know what? You can get it towed through AAA. But if you just let me do it on the low, then I can charge you a lesser rate. I've had people do that, and I'll just give them the cash. But if you're someone on the up and up, I could understand, like, if you have your car towed and you doing it on the low low, off the books, if something happens to the car in the towing process, like it gets scraped or like a dent or whatever, then there's no one to be liable for that.

Right. Whereas, like, AAA would have to pay you out damages if something happened to your car in transit. Right. So you are taking a risk as a consumer by doing it off the books. But I think he probably looked at this car and was like, this car is beat the hell.

Kulap Vilaysack
There you go. Right? He was like, and also, I could charge a little less and just leave AAA out of this one, which is what is given to me. So Jennifer says to wrap this up. He's just finished delivering the car and accepting $100 donation to his church.

Lacey Moseley
I didn't. Oh, he. So you sent this to me, like, as this man was delivering your car? Okay, Jennifer. He says, I didn't get the church name, but that's okay.

Something tells me I won't be claiming this donation on my taxes next spring. Aw. Okay. I see some nice things at the bottom. Thank you, Jennifer.

I love that you sent me this email as this man had your car in tow. So this could have gone live? Yeah, it's live. It's live. She's reporting live from the streets.

So she knew what was going down. She just wants to get her car to where she's getting. You know what I mean? Like, she knew. She knew she was not getting hoodweed.

Kulap Vilaysack
And it doesn't matter. I think this was a hookup. I mean, he kind of, like, finessed y'all a little bit in the beginning, but this just sounds like a hookup to me. Like, chowing is usually a little bit more expensive than that, so it sounds like, at least in LA, I don't know where they live. So in the end, he was a man of God, you know?

SuChin Pak
I mean, he didn't price gouge her. He provided a service. It's a win win for a lot of people in this scenario, I think. I'm not quite sure what the scam was. I don't think it's a scam.

Lacey Moseley
I mean, he lied a little bit. Then he scammed aaa. He scammed aaa like that? Yeah, we like that kind of scam. He scammed triple A scam up.

Aaa is doing just fine. Okay. They can miss a few, a few triples from that a. Okay. I don't think Jennifer, I don't think you got scammed.

I don't think he got scammed. It sounds like everybody. It worked it out, and it was great. Now, aaa didn't get a cut, but why do they need a cut? They're doing fine.

They're doing great. I think y'all both scammed aaa. And I love that you were putting this all on him, but you knew there was no church. You didn't even ask the name Jennifer. You was in on that scam.

You sent this to me like you were a victim. You were a participant. That's right. You collab. That's right.

Colluded. She was so confident that she could report live. Exactly. Jennifer was like, and then I opened the Macy's card in his name. And that's for God, too.

All the things we purchased will be going to the memorial Day sale. We'll be going to the church. Okay, don't even worry about that. I really went dark, you know? I thought this was gonna go way darker.

We've had some go. We've had some go. I don't know. Yeah. Where'd you think it was going?

SuChin Pak
Well, there was an address exchanged. I was like, well, that always scares me. But, yeah, in the least, the car is. You're not gonna get your car back. I mean, I just.

There were lots of other scenarios, but an address exchange, I think I'll just put that there. I was like, uh oh, well, but. At the same time, he did. I mean, he did. There would be some repercussions because she did reach out through AAA.

Kulap Vilaysack
So there is some. Unless it's this really big scam where he somehow has taken the calls from AAA and stolen a car. There would be some repercussions, right? She could find him, essentially, if he pulled up in the triple whip, then she could track that car down. Exactly.

She could at least go to triple. A and be like, hey, now, I wonder how many times churchy McGesis from AAA can do this scam, because triple A does have a dispatch that tells people when the cars are going where and where. So how many times is he pulling up and being like, oh, they actually left? Or, oh, they didn't have registration, or the car exploded, y'all. So then I didn't have to tow it.

Lacey Moseley
Like, what is he telling AAA? I walked, much like Nic cage in any movie. I walked away from it slowly and exploded behind me. Oh, on what block? No, they cleaned it up real fast.

They got good street cleaning. It was a street cleaning day. Go check the news. No, no, no, no. One saw it.

Yeah, yeah, don't worry about it. And then what criteria does he use to when he pulls up that this is the person that will be a participant in my story? He definitely clocked that car. They said it was a hobby car, was just giving hooptie. Hooptie lobby.

And so he was like, mm, they got a hooptie. They probably wanted. Yeah, let me pull out my rosary. So he took it out from underneath. And then, oh, I love that.

I feel like he saw the car. And then, you're right. He just yanked it up out from underneath his shirt. See, what I think, guys, is that you pull. If you were to go into his triple A tow truck and you were to hit that.

Kulap Vilaysack
Hit any sort of that front drawer there, pop that open. He's got Mardi Gras beef. He's got. He got a yamaka in there. What is it?

Lacey Moseley
Giving? Are they giving, Christian? Are they giving? Oh, hold on, hold on. Lahiyem from aaa.

Kulap Vilaysack
That's right. Hold on. Let me put that on real quick. He pop out. He got all types of things in there.

Lacey Moseley
Dashiki. He got some fits for Islam. He said, yeah, ali's got an astronaut. Hellman. Who knows?

Kulap Vilaysack
Who knows? Eid Mumbarak. I've been fast. How y'all doing? Y'all need me to tow your car?

Lacey Moseley
Okay. Don't have to get ready if you stay ready, right. I just finished my prayers. What's up? I can tow this for y'all real quick to the mosque.

Oh, to y'all house. Okay. Anywhere. You know I be going to all them places. I love this.

I hope he has a uniform. A wardrobe for everybody. He gets out with a little something for everybody. Yes. Robbery.

Kulap Vilaysack
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Lacey Moseley
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Goddess. Visit ixl.com Goddess to get the most effective learning program out there for the best price and fraud. Well, let's get into my favorite segment here, historic hoodwings. This is where I'll regale Culop and such in with a famous con caper group of criminals. Singular actor.

Singular. Wow, that came out of my mouth with so many more syllables. Syllables than singular. Singular actor er. And we'll get their opinions all throughout.

Maybe we love them. Maybe we hate them. I don't know. But this was pretty recent. So in 2024, the year of our Lord 2024, a serial con artist named Mark Roy Anderson was arrested for the third time over a near 50 year career of scams.

We love a serial entrepreneur. I want him to have a retirement party. We're looking at his driver's license right now. It's a California driver's license. Love that for him.

And, oh, he's got real blue eyes. Yeah, that's what I was noticing, too. And you know, he a scammer. Cause he put on a good shirt when he went to the DMV. He said, let me.

Let me put on my best shirt and get a little red tan before I go in there so the girls can know. He asked for red tan. Yeah, it's a spray on. You get that? Some people like, oh, yeah, I want kind of a bronze.

Kulap Vilaysack
But he's like, red, red. Okay. He's. I want the girls to know I got it for real. Okay.

Lacey Moseley
Make it look natural. That's right. So, like, no sunscreen in years. He ain't never seen no copper tone. And the most.

SuChin Pak
The most even egg shaped head I've ever. You know, that is a. If you're not gonna have one stitch of hair, that is. That is quite the perfectly shaped head this man has. And he's gone to the dentist.

Lacey Moseley
Definitely. He really has. Good for you. Curly whites out. Yeah.

SuChin Pak
This is a trustworthy, strawberry tanned white man. And I just know he got thick fingers. Like, big hands with thick fingers. Like. And I don't mean that in a weird, bad way.

Lacey Moseley
I mean, like, you know, like the hands that look like they. Like. He'd go to Home Depot and they'd be like, hey, what's up, Mark? How you doing? He's like, yeah, I'm in here for more grout.

You know, like, he definitely have bought. Grout and various pieces of wood. Yes. If I got a flat tire during the day and he pulled over and was like, hey, little mama, what's going on? I feel like I would let him fix my tire during the day.

During the day. During the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. During the day. I have to see a rosary, but.

Kulap Vilaysack
Maybe you need to see. You gotta pull out the drip for you. That's right. Like God watching us fix this flat. Where your donut at?

Lacey Moseley
In his name. Yes. A donut and a donation. Thank you, sir. So much.

So, Mark Roy Anderson. I love that he's got these three first names. Mark Roy Anderson. A mark of a criminal. Also, I love when people go by all of their names because I just know you do crime.

Kulap Vilaysack
But it's Mark Paul Anderson on his driver's license, right? Yeah, it's Mark Anderson. Yeah. Mark Paul Anderson. Where did the Roy come from?

That's his scam name. A little Sassone. Okay. It's interesting. Just change the middle name.

Lacey Moseley
He's like, nobody will know. Nobody will know. They call me Mark Paul now. He's the oldest of the Paul brothers. So he has a father.

He's a father of five children from California. Five of them. Thanks. Wow. Shout out to Miss Anderson.

Bless you and your womb. So he has a law degree and at one point practiced law in the state of Nevada. He was also on the business advisory council of the National Republican Congressional Committee. So definitely a scammer. What a.

SuChin Pak
Wow. What a leapfrog.

Lacey Moseley
Very cool guy. Yes, a business advisory. So you know he's doing the scam. Scam, business advisory. Okay.

So that's how y'all getting all your tax breaks? Loopholes? Yes. I'm looking for him myself. Who?

SuChin Pak
I mean, Nevada. Say no more. Thank you. Thank you for that. Yes.

Kulap Vilaysack
Pull that out. That's true. Oh, they got all kind of loopholes over there. Cause almost everything is legal. True.

Lacey Moseley
I love it. So he goes to Coachella and has a taste for luxury items, which is perhaps what led him from practicing law to a number of dubious business ventures. So Coachella turned him. I feel like Coachella could turn anybody into a criminal. I, um.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yes, you'd think more like burning man or something like that, but, yeah, I guess so. Now, burning man, they doing too. Too many drugs. Okay. Like, burning man is where you have a religious experience and you're very dirty.

Lacey Moseley
But orgies. Yeah, yeah, but Coachella. Yeah. With just unwashed people. But Coachella, you know, that's more commercial.

It's more of an influencer fest now. Also, this man would stick out like a sore thumb at Coachella. Cause this man is grown. Grown. And what is he doing out here with these children?

And they flower crown. Everyone's thinking, like, he's security. Right? Right. He could probably scam his way into any, like, vip section by just wearing black and standing around looking strong.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah. Cause he got a security head. That head says. Yeah, that head says, I've been bouncing at every nightclub my entire life. Like, I'm sure he walked out the womb and they gave him, like, a badge and a flashlight.

Lacey Moseley
Yeah. And he got to bouncing the babies up at a gymboree street. Yeah, it's like. Let me see a birth certificate. All right, you come in.

You teething? All right. Yeah, he's been a bouncer his whole life. Also, I was gonna say that Coachella taught me about a scam that came in handy recently for me and not for my homegirl. But when you go to Coachella and it's happening, it just passed, actually, which it wasn't really giving this year.

Like, the girls weren't really talking about it this year. But there are people who specifically go to Coachella to rob people. So usually they live in NDO or sometimes they travel up, but they know it's gonna be a lot of young kids with a disposable income who are probably intoxicated. So it's a very rife place to rob people. Any musical festival is y'all.

So I always tell the girls and the guys, like men. Or if, no matter how you identify, if you're someone who keeps a wallet versus a purse, like, put that wallet in your front pocket and have your hand over it. When you're shuffling through large crowds of people, and if you carry a purse, put that purse in front of and make sure that it is zip closed. Because sometimes you're body to body at these festivals, and people will bump directly into you chest to chest. And what they're doing is they're distracting you with the bump up top, and they're reaching into your bag, and they're taking your phone, they're taking your wallet, and it happens so quick, and there's so many people, you will never find them.

Kulap Vilaysack
They're gone. Yep. And I was at Coachella once, and this girl was walking past, and she was like, has anyone seen an iPhone? I was like, oh, baby girl, now you know you not getting that back. And right after that, there were these two girls who were speaking Spanish.

Lacey Moseley
I speak Spanish. I don't know why in America you would ever speak Spanish around people and assume people don't speak Spanish. We don't have an official language, and so y'all can't. You just can't assume people don't speak Spanish here. But they were talking about how they was about to get in my bag, and I just looked at them, and I was like, perdaname?

Can they sit down on me? I was like, I cussed them out, and they just looked at me like I was crazy and kept it moving. But after that, anytime I'm in a big crowd, that purse is closed. It's in front of me. And I was recently at the echoplex.

I would never go there again. We went for electric field. Cause we wanted to, like, hear all the songs we heard in college. Yeah. And these guys just kept bumping into us, and there was enough space where we were that there was no need to bump into us.

And one of my friends was like, oh, my God, they're hitting on us. Oh, y'all, we still got it. We still find. I was like, girl, this is something else. Put your purse in front of you.

Zip it closed. And one of the girls who was with us did not close her purse. And sure enough, 30 minutes later, she was like, I can't find my phone. And it was in her purse. And we called it and looked for it.

Every time we called it and went straight to voicemail, I said, baby, that phone is gone. They reached in your purse, and they got it. So, yeah, okay. I'm reminded of something that happened. Boy, what?

Have a cool. This was at. I think it was the sunset tower. Went there for a private birthday party. Cute.

Kulap Vilaysack
Not mine, someone else's. I set my purse down, and it was all friends. All private. Right. The private party and this girly, there's.

Security in front, so that's. But then it went missing. Damn. And then, I don't know why, I zeroed in on two women with big. Tote bags, but I did, and I threw them away.

Lacey Moseley
Why? You got a big tote bag, and we out. Yeah, we're not at restaurants. I don't recognize you. And there's something about you going around.

Kulap Vilaysack
And then they were about to leave, and there was just something. I don't know why, but I confronted them, and I reached into one of their tote bags, and I got my bag, and I lost the old cool op. Came through into the point where, like, I think at one point, like, did Scott have to come get me? I not only took the. Found my bag, cussed them out, and then, like, basically chased them out, but when I tell you that security.

This was a scam, I think security was in on it. Cause they did nothing. Because the altercation happened a little close to the front door. Then they ran out to Sunset Boulevard, and I was still hollering and screaming and to the point where I think also, I think Jack Black witnessed the whole thing. Like, I had lost my mind, and he was just like, oh, oh, are you okay?

Like, you know. And then they ended up. They ended up already taking. Had already. They taken the phone and put it somewhere else.

So they ended up. They got my phone, but I got my purse back. Everything but my phone. But it was this wild, like. Like I had returned to my teenage self in such a way, you know?

Lacey Moseley
Oh, he was busting hands. Cool up. I could see you got hands. Yes, I can tell. Hands energy when I meet.

You know what I mean? Yeah. And then I was just like. And, you know, do I wish that I really emptied everything? Cause come to find out, they took other people's stuff.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yes, of course. Of course they did. And clearly, like, had, like, a deal with, like, the security guard. Right. Probably the next.

Split it. Exactly. Or they got some cash to get in there or something. Yep. This is why in a friend group, when you travel, it doesn't matter where you go, right.

SuChin Pak
And you are out at a club, at a party, at a loud restaurant, there's always one designated purse holder. Am I right? Like, that's the person, you know, you want to go dance, you want to go to the bathroom, you want to go get a drink. There's always one person in that group that wants to hold your purse and God bless that person, and that person is doing the Lord's work. And that is the scenario.

Lacey Moseley
See, I don't feel like getting there yet to purse holding status with my friends. Like, we are very, very close, but I think we all want to get up and dance. So it's more. So we're just like, bring a tiny purse or a person. You can, like, cross body it or.

You know what I mean? This happened this weekend while I was in Miami with friends. And one of my friends kept, like, putting her. She kept putting her tiny purse down, like, by an exit door. And I just.

Kulap Vilaysack
At one point, I'm like, you can't do that. I was, gimme your purse. Give me your purse. So then we would just take turns. Something needed to take a break in the dance floor.

We'd all hold purses. Cause it's too. You're just inviting. Yeah, you're inviting the crime. And with the friend, when I told you that we were all together, I told her, I was like, close your purse.

Lacey Moseley
I told everybody to close their purse. I guess I was the purse friend. But it's like, you got your little bag, but close it up. She said she accidentally left it open. I was like, damn, girl.

And we looked for it, but I knew it was, you know, it was gone. Yeah, it was gone. It's gone. Well, sucha, we were so happy to have you here. Sucha is.

She's a busy gal, honey. Transition to the other side, apparently. I'll let you know. I'll come back as a hummingbird or a yellow button. Now we gotta do that reincarnation.

Kulap Vilaysack
Former Sunday school teacher Sutin Pac is crossing over everybody. Correct. I love you both. Yes. It was so wonderful to have you.

Lacey Moseley
Is there anything you want to plug before you go? I mean, Culp will do the work. You know what I mean? My sister in arms over there, I trust her. My life with my life and my purse.

Kulap Vilaysack
I trust her. Yeah. Purse is life. So that's deep trust. Well, thank you so much for coming on.

Lacey Moseley
All right, have a great day, love. All right, cool up. It's just me and you. Yeah. And now you got the purse weight on you and you got the episode.

Kulap Vilaysack
Look, I got a strong back. So Mark Roy, he's going to Coachella, and he's doing dubious business ventures. So that's what he's been up to. Right? So in the late 1980s, we're going to take a step back.

Lacey Moseley
An attorney for an italian marble company, Raul FEMA, was asked by Anderson to bid on a marble for $11 million building that he claimed to own in the coastal town of La Jolla, California. So he's asking. So Anderson was like, hey, my guy Raul, can you bid on this marble for $11 million for this, like, luxury building that I have? And Ro was like, I don't know about this. The deal didn't really work out.

But FEMA was impressed by Anderson. So when he later pitched him on investing $175,000 on another building project, he agreed and even doubled his investment. So basically, Anderson met this guy Raul, and he had knowledge of an auction where $11 million worth of marble was about to be sold. I'm assuming that Mark Anderson probably looked at Raul and was like, oh, this guy got money. Let me act like I got money, too.

So he kind of dealer. So he hit him with a high pitch and was like, oh, yeah, you know, I just need, like, a little eleven mil bid on this. That's all. You know, something cheap, something small. And I'm sure that, like, Raul was probably like, I don't know this man that well.

And maybe he didn't want to have or have $11 million to bid on this marble. So he was like, I'm going to take it down a notch. But when rich people start. People who are purporting to be rich start talking about large amounts of money like they're nothing that impresses other rich people. Yeah, it does.

So when you look at something, it gives cred. Yeah, it gives credence, because it's like, okay, you rich, rich. If you don't care about a little eleven mil, you start calling it a little eleven mil and shit. And they're like, ooh, you must have a lot of money if you think. About it, for a big building.

Kulap Vilaysack
You know, what is that? What is that for a. And then you get caught in those weeds. Exactly. There was never a building.

Lacey Moseley
Don't worry about all that, sweetheart. Don't worry about if there's a building, okay? We need marble. We need marble. Focus on the marble.

So Raul is impressed by Mark Anderson, and he's like, you know what? $175,000, which is a steep jump down from 11 million. Nothing. Yeah. He's like, oh, yeah, that's nothing.

I'll do that. You know what? I'll even double it. Cause I really think that you're onto something. You talking that money talk?

So, however, when FEMA, this is Raul, went to visit one of the buildings in person, he met the actual owner, who was definitely not Mark Anderson. So culp you were close. There was a building, but Mark did not own it. Mm hmm. So there was a building.

He ain't lie about that. You can see it on Google Maps. And did you say prior, though, that he did an investment and then got a return? No, actually, in this one, he asked Raul to bid on $11 million worth of marble. Okay.

But then Raul, I guess, didn't want to do it or was, like, $11 million too much. But he's like, this guy knows where to buy $11 million. I don't know where to buy $11 million worth of marbles. So you gotta have some kind of. You know, there's certain things that rich people know about that we just don't.

Like a certain, like. Like, exorbitantly rich person will know about. Like, I'm sure there's all types of places in Lax that I don't know about, and I'm not even just talking about private jets. I'm sure there's even a richer. There's a Jeff Bezos level of things that I don't know where they are.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah, I mentioned, like. Like, going to Miami this past weekend, and when I just look at yachts and all the things that surround yachts, it's such another level of, like, beyond rich, rich, rich, right? Cause even a small yacht is crazy expensive. And then Jeff Bezos yacht, where they have to move a european historical bridge so that it might go to ocean. Like, it's.

These are, like, levels of, like, that. I will never know these nuances. We gonna get on there one way or another. It may not be ours, but we gonna get on it. We're gonna know about yachts.

Lacey Moseley
Yeah. They need entertaining people on the yacht. Rich people love to have somebody who's there, like, ooh, this is so nice. You are so rich. But I feel like you're talking about us as UCB performers, doing, like, improv.

That's what me, Lacey, are gonna get. We're gonna put on a show, right? Welcome to Jeff Bezos yacht. Can I get a word? Any word at all?

Murder. Okay. I heard murder. Missing wife. Okay.

All right. We're gonna do a short show that's all made up, y'all. Right. Now on the yacht. Oh, got a little turbulence.

Oh, we don't call it that on the yacht. What's it called? What's that called? Bumpy ocean. We hit in bumpy ocean.

What is it called? Cause, like, that reminds me of that show that was on, like, after crazy rich Asians came out, Netflix made a show that was called Rich Asians. Or Asians so rich.

Kulap Vilaysack
Bling empire. Bling empire. Yeah, bling empire. And Bling empire was a bunch of rich people of asian descent from different places. And have you seen it?

Lacey Moseley
I've seen you have the name, so you probably have seen it. And there was one guy on there, Kevin, who was broke as hair. And Kevin was just there to admire how rich everybody was. He was a good scammer. He just showed me, like, wow, these places are so nice.

Oh, these clothes are for me. Thank you. I've never had. How do you say this? Balencicaga.

Kulap Vilaysack
Wow, that's exactly right. He was our way in. Yes. Cartiers. Cartier Carters.

That's very it. That very much it. He was on a season two of traitors. Yes. And he lasted so long.

Lacey Moseley
Cause he was so dumb. The people who last the end of traitors are stupid. And so if I was a faithful, I would play real, real, real dumb to the end and then get the traitors out. Or if I was a traitor, I'd know exactly how to play. I wanna be on it so bad.

Kulap Vilaysack
I actually think you would be fantastic. I feel like my reps would never let. My lawyer would promptly cuss me out. But I'm like, please just let me do one season. I would be so good.

Lacey Moseley
Oh, my goodness. But, yeah, so we're gonna find our way in there to moving the european bridge and being like, hey, hello, Europe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But do we want to? I don't wanna own it.

I just wanna go own it. You know, I don't need to own a private jet, but as a part of my reparations that I'm giving to me, I feel like, you know, everybody else should respect admissions and fly commercial, and I should be able to get on a jet from time to time. Well, that's right. There should no oppression. There shouldn't be any glass ceiling for us in terms of.

Kulap Vilaysack
But let me throw this at you, though. How are you on the seas? I get motion sickness. Oh. I mean, I might have to pop a little drama.

Lacey Moseley
Dramamine just a little bit in the beginning, but my parents, oh, my gosh. Until I willed them out of this, they used to love going on cruises, like, to the point where we were, like, gold, platinum medallion status cruise members. Oh, they would trap me in the ocean with just, like, upper middle class trump supporters eating got fieri burgers till my ankle swole. It was just tough. I don't want that.

Kulap Vilaysack
And then also, I have an unrealistic. Fear that I will be shoved into the ocean. I mean, that's a real fear also, jumping into the ocean. There's something about. I don't know what the phrase is called, but, like, when me and my dad, we would go out to the balcony, and we just look at the water.

Lacey Moseley
And then I remember one time we looked at each other, and I was like, you kind of want to jump, don't you? And he was like, yeah, I do something about it. Like, I know I would die, but, like, I want to jump in there. Like, if something happens to the brain. Where you're, like, called by sirens.

Yes. Yeah. The ocean's listening. It's deep, and it's mysterious. Yeah.

Halle Bailey was down there. Like, she was a little mermaid. I was like, what you doing down there, Sebastian? Down there? What?

Go on. Like, I'm gonna go, yeah, it's something about it. Okay, so I fully understand that. So, you know, FEMA. Raul FEMA.

I'm gonna call him Raul from here on out. Raul was like, you know what? I'm gonna give you this little investment. But then he pulls up to the building, and he's like, hey, yo, where's Mark? He owns this building.

And the other man's like, no, Mark owns this. No, I own this building. I don't know what you're talking about. So when Raul confronted Anderson, Anderson claimed that he had already sold the building for their profit. He said he had immediately put those proceeds into developing another building, which is why Raul hadn't seen any of the money yet.

Kulap Vilaysack
Okay, okay. So, okay. Raul said, I went to the building, and they said, you don't own it. He said, yeah, I don't. I actually just sold it, like, 20 minutes ago.

Lacey Moseley
When were you there? An hour ago. We inked it. Yeah, I don't own that no more. And we already put the money into another building that I'm gonna let you see in about an hour and a half.

Oh, man. He's like, mark, are you googling right now? No, no, no, no. We got another building. Don't worry about that.

So, when Anderson started avoiding Raul's calls, Raul went straight to the FBI in person to file a criminal complaint against Mark. I love that. Raul was like, okay, he's not picking up his phone. Hello? FBI.

F. The B. And I. Hello? I have been scammed.

Like, you have to have a lot of privilege or a certain amount of money to immediately call the FBI. That's the ultimate Karen, right? Forego the police. You skipped over to local police, state police, and you went to the federal government. Yeah, hello, CIA.

Yeah, I have been scammed. That's right. Is this the Pentagon? Uh huh. Hello.

It's me, Robert. My name is Raul. FEmA put me on with the president. But his last name, FEMA, so. Right.

He's like, they know me over there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. These sounds are familiar to you. I want to be that kind of rich, where it's like, oh, my God, my car was robbed. Hello, FBI?

I got a crime priority. No, move away from the national security. My car. Yes, use your government precogs, right? This is urgent.

Okay, so what Raul didn't know was that at the time, the feds were already investigating Mark about other investors. So other investors have called the FB and I as well. So the FBI was like, get in line, girl. All the girls are complaining about Mark. That's.

We know all about him. So several years earlier, between 1983 and 1986, Anderson had executed a Ponzi style scheme to defraud investors in what they believed was a partnership to purchase and rehabilitate historic buildings across the country. So he said, y'all, we gonna refurbish these old ass buildings. See, this is what happens when you have too much money and you don't know what to do with it. Cause why are you trying to refurbish old buildings?

Who said you needed to do that? Yeah, these crimes that, like, rich. It's tough because it's raul thought in his, maybe I'm wrong. And he's like, I'm just trying to invest money. But it's like, you're also trying to be like, that's a thing.

Kulap Vilaysack
Like my mom. You think that you're gonna game the system, that you're gonna have some sort of. In that you are so clever that, you know, like, you are primed as a pomp to be taken by a scammer. Right? Or also, like Su Kin was saying, where she said her older korean family members would have, like, the kit.

Lacey Moseley
And then one person walks away. Mark. Always walking away with the kit. Always walking with the kid. He's always walking away with it.

So Anderson formed approximately 20 limited partnerships involving about 2000 investors, following which he commingled funds from the various projects and diverted funds from one project to pay for another. So he got everybody together, didn't tell them that he was doing this, and then started moving the money around. Very Ponzi like. Mm hmm. So in his pitches to investors, he falsely claimed he was a California attorney.

In reality, he was a disbarred, short lived Nevada attorney. Now, what you gotta do in Nevada to get disbarred? Cause I feel like. Yeah, that's right. I feel like they're probably the place that would let you slide the hardest.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah, you were stretching really thin. You were stretched thin. You were doing splits all the time. Your back bends. I mean, really like that.

But, yeah, like, the bar is solo. For you to have gone under that. Mark was letting his clients pay in casino chips. I mean, what did you do? What did you do?

Lacey Moseley
In 1994, Anderson. Mark Anderson pleaded guilty to mail fraud. They'll always get you in the mail. We always say, you don't want them. People coming up with no doors.

They will put you in that mail truck and take you to prison. And he agreed to pay $6.8 million in restitution and was sentenced to 84 months in prison. 84 months. So how many years is that? Twelve divided by 84.

Kulap Vilaysack
I'm the worst asian. I'm so bad at math. Okay, cool. Don't have people thinking I looked at you like you were supposed to know the answer. Okay.

Lacey Moseley
They came. That was totally me. I volunteered that. It was about seven years. I did that fast math.

Definitely didn't pick up my phone. You'll never know. I did it so fast. Okay, so when you say, yeah, okay, yeah, sure, I'll pay 6.8 million. I mean, like, that money's gone.

Exactly. And also 6.8 million. To who? Cause sometimes restitution never goes. It rarely goes directly to the victims.

So I'm like, why is the government just taking a cut? And then everybody who else lost their money doesn't get it back? Because investors lost more than $47 million. Yeah. So even if they gave, the government gave them a piece of that 6.8, they're not getting their money back.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah, they're not. So Mark Anderson was also sentenced to four years in state prison for grand theft, preparing false evidence, and attempted grand theft for stealing money from other victims who invested in a building he lied about owning. Now I feel like if you're investing in something, this is why I always say, like, people assume that because you're rich, that means you're smart. It doesn't. People have different sets of skills.

Lacey Moseley
You can be very talented at hoarding wealth and not have very many other active brain cells in your body. That's just like, there's some musical geniuses that I love their music and stuff. But if I needed, like, a triple bypass, I'm not calling. I love her, but I'm gonna call a doctor who, you know, a thoracic surgeon, like. But people like to just assume that if you're rich, that you just must be a genius in every category.

Kulap Vilaysack
Like, a lot of there's inherited money where you literally did nothing. Like, that's it. You're not imbued with that. Your genetics must be those of the intelligent. That's how the royal family's still doing that scam.

Lacey Moseley
They're like, we've been fucking our cousins, and we are your God. Well, Donald Trump. Right? Come to our parades and shit. We getting married again.

Royal family. Yes. No, you're right. You're right. Real scam, girl.

Shit. Yes. But, yeah, so I don't. Me personally, if I'm gonna make an investment in something, I feel like one of the, like, the smallest barriers to entry is making sure that you own the place. I think so.

Like, I feel like I need to. Know that I think so. Yes. Right? Like, y'all really let this man sell you a breach.

Kulap Vilaysack
But you hear so many. Like, that's my favorite articles to read is the LA Times that are for subscribers only. And they usually are like, these scams. These scams where, like, there's this guy in woodland Hills who scammed his neighbors and created sort of this Ponzi scheme. And, like, they would get early returns because he was moving money around.

Lacey Moseley
The new money was giving it to the old investors. Ponzi. And then, you know, there was a watch guy that got busted recently who had a bunch of. He would hold and resell a bunch of rolexes and expensive, like, watches of that kind. And then similarly, was moving.

Kulap Vilaysack
Was living a lifestyle that he wanted that money for. Plus moving money around with other people. It's just like, you just hear that story all of the time. And if one person, like, if they seem credible or someone, one person vouches, it's like, kind of over. And there's no such thing as legal easy money.

Lacey Moseley
That's right. I promise you, y'all, if you want easy money, you have to do crime. There is no such thing as legal easy money. Cause if there were, then everybody would be doing it. So whenever you find yourself being offered, also, like, people are greedy in this country.

Ain't nobody offering to give you money. Anytime somebody tells you, like, I got this great opportunity, why they not doing the opportunity by themselves and being quiet about it? Cause that's what rich people do. They're not gonna tell you about it unless they need your money. You should immediately be skeptical.

So around the same time, Mark received a third convention after he falsified documents to secure a $120,000 mortgage loan and was sentenced to 32 months in jail to run consecutively with the other two prison terms. Okay, yeah. So consecutively if you get concurrent sentences. I've been watching a lot of SVU, which I can't stop talking about on this show. Cause it's such a big man bits in.

The stabler was ruining everybody life. They was breaking the law constantly. And I don't know why we rooted for them. They're terrible people. They're horrible.

They didn't care nothing about the victims. They didn't care nothing about nobody. They were literally like, we gotta close this case. And they always promising people, they like, I promise you, we'll keep you safe. And then they'd be like, chunk, chunk.

And then they be dead in the next scene. It's like, you ain't keep nobody safe and you don't care about anybody. Y'all are evil. But I love them. I love Marissa Arkaday.

I think I've said that on this podcast before. I'm sorry. I'm still. There's so much that's for you. I could watch it forever.

And it's funny to me now. I know that show wasn't meant to be funny, but I'll be cracking it up. I'll be like, you laughing at it? I was like, not, they beating the hell out of another suspect. And then they'll beat the hell out of the suspects.

Suspect coming all bloody and bruised. And then somebody will knock on the door and they'll be like, hey, what is this? Y'all gotta step outside real quick. And they step outside and they'd be like, he's not our guy. Oh, oh, our bad.

And then they just like, let the guy beat up. All limping away. And it's like, that's police brutality. This man did not do anything. And they're just like, nah, but he got bad vibes.

So it's cool that we fucked him up and we held him in a room and turned the heat up for 24 hours. Like, what? Yo, they be doing crime over there? Oh, no, I haven't seen it. Yeah, so he's gotta serve these terms consecutively.

Correct me if I'm wrong, Judith. That means that after he serves 84 months, he has to serve the 32 months. It's like they're not concurrent. Cause concurrent would be that he serves them all at the same time. Yeah, like a sandwich.

So they said, no, we putting this on top of them. 84 months. Then you got another 32 after that. So don't even worry about that, sweetheart. You're dying in jail.

So his oil investment scheme, you know, he's still. So Mark Anderson. He's enterprising. He is. He got released from prison in the early two thousands, right?

So this is all in the eighties when he was getting all of these sentences and whatnot, right? Or 94. So then in the early two thousands, he got out, you know, probably good behavior, because 94 to 2000 would have meant that he didn't even serve all of his 84 months, especially. And the 32. But they were like, you know what?

This man has a perfectly shaped head. He's gonna come out reformed and rehabilitated. The other piece is that a guy like him, he's a people person. He did really well in prison. He was like, people enjoyed being in prison with him.

Kulap Vilaysack
And he probably made a lot of contacts, right? He was like, oh, there goes Mark. He's like, hey, how y'all doing, buddies? I made some more shanks for y'all. Yeah, that's right.

Lacey Moseley
Got another toothbrush shipment. I'd love to be your guy. Yeah. Who needs to stab someone this weekend? That's right.

All right. That's right. I got those Robin packets for y'all. Like, yeah, I feel like he was that guy in Brisbane, 100%. They're like, oh, we all love Mark.

He probably didn't even have to join the aryan gang. Probably not. Like, he's just cool with everybody. His head's already shaved. It's fine.

We get it. He's white. Yeah, yeah. He was in there being a queen. And also, he's going to, like, federal prison.

He's going to, like, fancy prison. White collar. White collar prison. Yeah, yeah. Martha Stewart prison.

So, right. He gets Martha's old cell. He's like, it's decorated very nicely, very warm. Like, wasn't she in a women's prison? Yeah, I had it moved over here.

You know how Jeff Bezos gets the european bridge moved? I just had her wholesale moved over here with my money left over. Cause I didn't pay all the restitution. No, no. 6.8 out of 47 million.

Where did 47 million things go? I was hiding a lot of money from my wife and five kids, too, so, like, they don't even know about that. His wife and five kids, where are they? You know what? I bet the wife had an offshore account.

They're probably living good. They haven't even mentioned her. Or she. She got scammed by him, too. She had five kids, so we already know he was scamming five of them things in this economy, do we even.

Kulap Vilaysack
Know if they're all the same mom, though. You know what I mean? Who knows? Yeah. I mean, yeah.

Lacey Moseley
We actually have not mentioned a wife in here. It just said he has five kids. And we know men can get kids in many different ways. Yes, they do. My dad.

Go ahead, Kulop. You really got a bone to pay with your treat today. Okay, I put them on notice. Loose lips. Listen, I love it.

Loose lips about my family, and we love it here. I love a loose lip here. Okay, no tight lips around here. So after he gets out into the two thousands, he bounces right back to the grift. He started a chain of eye surgery centers.

Oh, no, no. This is a real pivot. No, I'm so scared. You went from buildings to eyeballs. So, in prison, what did you start looking at?

Ocular nerves. And he was like, oh, this is lit. Like, how did you go from buildings to eyeballs? That is a jump. It makes me think of if you're from Texas and you remember doctor Booth, there was this guy who had these advertisements in Texas.

His name was Doctor Booth, and he did Lasik, but he was very. He had a very strong southern draw. So it'd be like. Like, I'm doing Lasik, and this is the most success rate surgery you can ever get. We gonna cut on your eyeball while you're awake, and you won't feel a thing.

Like, he literally talked like this in his commercials. And I was like, I would never let this bumpkin cut on my eyeball. Like, what are we doing? I do think I better feel something. But people went to doctor Booth, okay, and shout out to him, I'm not saying you didn't do it.

Well, doctor Booth, there was just something about that draw that I was like, I can't let you cut on my eyeball, son. But he probably the best out there. Let us know, let us know. Let us know. If doctor Booth cut on your eye, please write it to the show.

Cause I want to know if you can see still. So these centers failed, obviously, because where is your expertise in this? Shortly after, his business partner was arrested for health care fraud. So he had a. So I guess the business partner knew something about the eyeball.

Enough to open a surgery center, but then was arrested for healthcare fraud. So, between March 2006 and November 2010, Mark Anderson went around to investors, promising to put their money in several oil companies and similar projects. Instead, he stole $9 million from more than 20 victims and used their money for his personal expenses. Now, here's the great thing about scamming rich people. Wow.

There's so much shame surrounding scams. So it's like, if you're rich and everyone assumes you're a genius, and not that you had family money or you probably got it off slave wage labor or slavery or, you know, murder, you don't want to admit to people that you got scammed because in their world, it may. And honestly, in most people's world, they feel stupid. They feel like, oh, yeah, I'm a mark, right? When in reality, any and everybody can be scammed, and there shouldn't be shame in it, because I don't understand how Mark Anderson's name did not get through the streets of, like, do not invest with this man.

Kulap Vilaysack
It's because people think they're giving. They're getting away with something. Cause I'm like, everybody should have known. Y'all should have had a rich people party. And over T and Krumpus and caviar, y'all talk about how y'all don't fuck with Mark no more.

No, because they're all a bunch of gatekeepers. Mm hmm. But how you gonna gatekeep like someone? Maybe they wanted it to happen to other people. They were like, nah, let's let him rip everybody off, right?

Lacey Moseley
He not gonna just get me. He need to get everybody. He run the back of the pool. I'm gonna pick him up from jail and introduce him to all my friends. Already got, like, here you go, Mark.

I bought you some sperries and a $30,000 t shirt. Nobody will know it's $30,000. Now get on this boat and scam all these people. I can't be alone. So among his victims was the record label executive Brian Williams.

Now, Brian Williams, if you don't know him by that name, I'm gonna give you another name. Birdman. Oh.

For those who know, if you know, if you know about the Birdman hand rub, I do see Birdman getting involved in nefarious activities, because he is hilarious. So he started cash money records in the 1990s with his brother, Ronald Slim Williams. And so we have a picture of Birdman right here. Birdman would make investments with Mark. They both have the Yoni head.

They probably bonded over, just, like, an oval shaped head. And if you've never put some respect on my name, you know, if you don't know Birdman, please get into his hilarious shenanigans. But he's, like, the reason Lil Wayne is famous. Like, got it, got it. Yeah.

Cash money records took over the nine nines in the two thousands. Yep. So if you've heard, back that ass up. That's Birdman, okay? Which we all have.

We all know that song is witchcraft. I can't not dance to it no matter where I am. So we're looking at what? I'm hearing it in my head right now, right? Oh, yeah.

Oh, okay. Yeah. You know? And clearly, one of them stole all the hype, Gene, and left the crumbs for Birdman. That's probably why his name Birdman.

He gotta fly to really see things. But, yeah. So these are the brothers, right? So they go on. They rep Nicki Minaj, Lil Wayne and Drake, right?

In the early two thousand and ten s, the brothers formed an oil and gas exploration company with Mark Anderson's help. So now they were trying to enter the big leagues. They got the record label money. They got the 360 deal money. They've probably stolen so much money from artists who were trying to become famous, but also, you know, they're trying to get into that long Bezos european bridge money.

So they're starting this oil and gas exploration thing. And Mark's like, I can help y'all. Brr. I love rap. So he also pitched Birdman on an oil rig investment opportunity in Oklahoma, which convinced him to wire Anderson about $5.4 million between April and September of 2008.

So I will say, mark Anderson, you are very bold, because me, personally, I'm not going to steal from men who have tattoos on their faces and a grown man who's comfortable being called Birdman. Like he said. Please address me as Birdman. No, that's what I want. Yeah.

Any grown ass man who's like, I'm. Pookie or little anything, it should make you. You have goosebumps. Yeah. Because that man is not afraid to fight.

That's what he's telling you. He's ready to fight. You should be ready for flight. Get the flight, Birdman. You do not want him flying off on you.

Okay? I met. At the I heart radio awards. I met. And I just want to call him Shay Shay, but Shannon Sharp.

And he calls himself Shay Shay at club Shay Shay. Right? That is a big ass, burly man. Okay? And he's like, call me Shay Shay.

I will never pick any. I will never get in the crosshairs of what he got going on, okay. Cause he looks strong. Okay? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Any. Any guy who's got, like, a very soft nickname. Not me. Be scared.

Be afraid. So Anderson even arranged visits for Birdman to see the oil wells in person, including full tours of the oil fields and introductions with Nona Roach, the broker for the Bureau of Indian affairs, which owned the land. So this time around, he was like, let me show you people who own it. I'll give you a little tour. However, it was all a ruse, though.

The wells were real and the broker genuine. Anderson was lying to them all. So he stepped his lies up. This time, he actually talked to the real broker. He took Birdman.

He was like, oh, yeah, we got Christelle. Birdman, come on down here, bring all your diamonds and your crew and took them around the oil wells. And he was like, see, Birdman, oil right here. See this lady? Legit.

Still a ruse, according to Roach. And Roach is the. She's known to. Roach is the broker right, from the Bureau of Indian Affairs. Roach says Anderson knew nothing about the oil and gas business after one of the guys on the tour played a trick on him and opened up one of the valves of the gas well, the pressure made a loud noise and scared every non oil expert in the group, including Anderson.

Elbows and assholes were running towards us. Sorry. Elbows and assholes were running towards us. So they were scared. So then they backed up like, I'm coming at you if my elbow's in my asshole.

Cause the bow is on the back and the hole is on the back. So that means we was running away. They must. This is beautiful. You out of way with words, Miss Roach.

Okay, so I'm guessing this means they were running away when they heard the sound. So it's like the sound pops off of the thing, and then they like, shots fired, you know, these men are from the street. They were like, let's get out of here. So they all take off running, including Mark. Now, Mark is supposed to be of the oil and gas business, so if he heard the pop, he should have known this was gonna happen when the valve was taken off, because he's around oil and gas all the time, but he running with them, okay?

He was like, yeah, I'm with y'all. I'm with y'all. And they like, wait a minute. You know what? Why you with us?

You supposed to be the one who's an expert in this. Because then Nona's like, hey, y'all, that's just what happens. Like, we know this was gonna happen. But they were like, shots fired. Get down.

SuChin Pak
Yeah. Interesting. Interesting. And Mark did not. He didn't play his role there.

Kulap Vilaysack
So he didn't play his role there. Nope. But it's hard to get past her turn of phrase. And is that now? Yeah, it's like, yeah, elbows and assholes.

Elbows and assholes. It's a lot like a roll of toothpaste. A roll of toothpaste and elbows. Got that phrase. Listen, after the shots rang out, it was all elbows and assholes, including me.

Lacey Moseley
I had my booty hole up to the sky, running away. Okay. I was throwing bows. Everyone. We got new phrases, okay?

Roll a toothpaste. Elbows and assholes. Take it out there. Spin the block with it. Make it happen.

Yeah. Put it in your lexicon. We got a new slang. Yeah. So, in 2011, Anderson pleaded guilty to money laundering and wire fraud.

Despite writing several handwritten letters to the judge. He was sentenced to 135 months in prison and three years of supervised release. We're gonna give you 135 of those things. And when you get out, we're gonna have someone watching you, because we know that you're gonna get out and immediately just do crime again. I'm also laughing at Mark.

Kulap Vilaysack
What letters are you writing? What do you think that you're gonna be able to string together to convince a judge? And he didn't even say, like, he had people writing on his behalf? No, no. He's writing this multiple.

Lacey Moseley
Dear Mister Judge of the court, it's me, Mark. How you doing today? You look very sexy, and I'm sure you smell good. Anyways, can I not go to jail? I don't want to.

I don't want to because I'm a cool guy. I love you. Are you interested in oil and gas? Cause I do have a plug. And this could work out for us all, at least with sincere elbows and assholes.

Mark, your boy. Your boy, your boy, Mark. So, the pot scheme. Almost immediately after his release from prison in 2019, Anderson began hatching another. Listen.

This man is dedicated to crime. He's free of his life at this point. He goes to prison. Like, people go on vacation. He's like, I gotta do a few months.

It's cool. Okay. But then he comes out and he thinks, Birdman. Birdman's okay. He feels good.

Kulap Vilaysack
Birdman feels fine about the situation. Well, yeah. $5.4 million. I hope Birdman got his money back. Prison might have been a good thing to protect him from Birdman.

Lacey Moseley
Why are you like. Yeah, he said, he seems so relaxed. He does seem very, like, I need his kind of calm. Like, I'm over here stressed over minor things, and I feel like this man is not stressed at all. Cause he's a psychopath, right?

Kulap Vilaysack
I mean, that's what we're getting at. Like, he doesn't care if he hurts other people. No, not at all. Yeah. And also, like, he doesn't care about going to jail.

Lacey Moseley
He's like, oh, three hots and a cot. I'll do my vacation. I'll come out, start doing crime immediately again. You know, that's his passion. Yeah, well, last time he was there, sounds like it was just a bunch of ted talks and workshops of how to refine his, like, scam.

Listen, America always says, follow your dreams. What if your dreams are crime, you gotta follow those, too. I don't see where he's wrong here. So in April of 2020, despite being banned from any business involving loans, he began telling investors about a family hemp farm in Kern County, California. So now he's got a family hemp farm.

Anderson don't ever see his kids, Mark Anderson, poor. They got a dead be dead. Like, if he not in prison, he out here robbing people. Like, when do you see your kids take time to be a dad, Mark? Mom had to immediately.

Kulap Vilaysack
First time he went to prison and did the divorce so that she doesn't have, you know, she had to. Had to. Because this man has no time for his children. He don't got crime. They'd be taking money, her money.

You know what I mean? There's no way they stayed married if. They were ever married. If they were ever. That's right.

Lacey Moseley
So Anderson described himself as a generational hemp farmer who had created a company called Harvest Farm Group to help their business. He's a generational. He got the long hemp money, okay? He's like, we've been making him that. Hemp'S been braided since time.

Immoral slaves used to pick this hemp. Like, he was like, I gotta my lineage, right? So he needed money to help his vision of planting, growing and harvesting hemp to convert into medical grade CBD for mass distribution. Now, if you got a long line of hemp farming going on, why do you need other people's help? Y'all don't have this infrastructure because you.

Kulap Vilaysack
Gotta scale up, Lacey. We're trying to expand. We're trying to modernize our family farm. We're just, you know, like, we wanna to see all this potential. So if you sharks could give me just a little bit of money.

Lacey Moseley
I hope he does all of his investment presentations like he's on shark Tank. Why does he keep calling us sharks? Don't worry about that. Just give me the money. So he told investors he also wished to sell hemp derived products such as CBD infused olive oil, which we need.

You know, I guess, you know, when you're making salmon and you want to go to sleep. It works. Don't think about it too hard. So he provided investors with pictures of his crops, which allegedly included three successful harvests and which later turned out to be stock photos. Yes.

They were like, Mark, why is this. This watermark all over the crops? He's like, oh, don't worry about that. My photographer, he ain't wanna sell me the pictures right now. But these are mine.

These are mine. I know they say stock dot, google.com dot, but I actually provide the stock photos for. Cause we the biggest hit hemp distributors. So they were like, can we take some photos for Google? That's why.

Don't even worry about it. I'm good with money, right? That's all. That's all. So when the returns never materialized and Anderson felt pressured by investors, he turned to another type of hemp business, which involved processing hemp stolen from Oregon farmers.

So now he's like, now I'm stealing hemp as well. I'm so triggered right now because I'm triggered right now because in 20 2018 or 2019, I did a documentary called Origin Story, and it's all about me, like, going to. It's about me going to Laos to meet my birth father, who I never met before, when I'm, like, 34 and making peace with myself and my very complicated relationship with my mother, which I've. Told you a little bit about. And spoiler alert, I'd love you all to see it.

Kulap Vilaysack
You can see it anywhere. You know, Amazon, apple would, whatever, but I'm gonna. Spoiler alert, here it comes. Like, my father, at the end of it, asked me to help him invest in a pot farm that he and my younger sisters, my birth father, there's, like, three sets of daughters that I am the oldest of. And that was like, I was like, oh, thank God.

My mom. I have to dealt. I've dealt with my mom for so long that I don't need to in any way engage. The red flags are all over the place. I'm cutting you here.

But that was his. Like, he's a scammer. Like, my birth father's a scammer. He saw them cameras you had around him was like, mm, hold on. You were like, this is a beautiful opportunity to reconnect with my lineage.

Lacey Moseley
And he was like, I got an opportunity for you, Pop. I mean, the thing is, is that this is just to the side, and I could totally get it if you cut this. Like, I knew. I knew when I finally reached out to him and he asked me if I had certain paperwork that would help him to the country, I knew that I needed something from him, which was to meet him, and I was just gonna shoot this documentary. And if he needed something for me, that means that he would be there and he'd be.

Kulap Vilaysack
So. And these are the transactional. So whenever we talk about scamming, it runs in such a deep sort of level of like, because I think I could have been a scammer in another life. And if I went the way of the hustler way of both of my parents, it could have, you know. But the specific scam of, like, oh, yeah.

Like, at the time, all of that youngest set that he was with, of sisters were all like, 16 and under. You're gonna have them work in. Oh, well, my cousin, I know a cousin in up north, Kern Valley, that sort of area. And he says that we can make a lot of money. You know, I mean, all of these things, it's just like, no, yeah.

Lacey Moseley
And it's such a bummer, too, because it's like you're reconnecting with your father. You're doing this thing where you're seeing your roots, and then immediately it's like. And I understand the transactionalness of it all in the beginning of, like. Yeah, like, it would be nice to have my father, like, closer. You know what I mean?

Like, your parents, especially if you hadn't met him before, you know, and, like, get to know who he is as a person. And he looks exactly like me. Oh, wow. Yeah. And then it informs, like, who you are sometimes, but then.

Yeah, but then when that's a bummer. And then you just want to put the toothpaste back into the toothpaste roll. Yeah, and just be like, I never. I didn't need this toothpaste roll from target. Okay, I'll give you $4,000 in gift cards.

I don't need this toothpaste roll after all. Plug it up. Yeah, plug the roll up. I feel that. And so this man is doing that not with his family, but with these other people who are, you know, part of a social contract where they believe that he's telling the truth.

So Anderson promised several farmers he was going to turn their hemp into CBD and share the profits. But they sent shipments and would receive nothing but unanswered calls. So he reached out to people to get actual CBD from farmers in Oregon. Cause he didn't have it right. He made up the whole situation that he was talking about in Kern.

So now he's like, y'all ship me your hemp. I'm gonna cook it up in the CBD, and then y'all are gonna get some of the profits. And so he just took all their hemp and never sent them anything, just stole it. So one farmer decided to travel to California to find his missing hemp and found 39 bags of it in an open field, deteriorating and damaged by the sun behind a John Deere dealership. This man went like Liam Neeson to find his hemp.

He said, I got a special set of skills, and I'm gonna find this hemp. And he finds it. It's just in bags sitting outside. So, not again. Marcus getting into a business where he knows absolutely nothing about the product.

He don't know about eyeballs. He don't know about hemp. He don't know about buildings. He don't know about marble, but he's gonna get involved anyway. And this farmer was petty enough to track him down and find his hemp in bags.

Kulap Vilaysack
Yeah. And now it's like, even though he found the hemp, he can't use the hemp. The hemp is sun damaged. And just sit down behind John Deere. He's like, where does hemp look like?

Lacey Moseley
It's a farm by John Deere. See, he probably took some photos with a tractor in the hemp next to it. Man, that's so wild. And then just left the shit there. He was like, I just needed hemp vibes.

I needed farm vibes. I'm dead with this. Wow. So, the address to Anderson's farm turned out to belong to an unrelated vineyard. In total, he built $19 million out of investors while trying to hide the reality from both investors and farmers.

He was living the high life between 2020 until his arrest. And Peterson spent $650,000 with the money he scammed on vintage and luxury cars and $13,000 on private jets. I don't know how far you're getting with $13,000 on a private jet. Not that far. It felt like a flight, but, okay.

In September 2020, he bought a $1.3 million gated, three bedroom home in Ojai's east end. So now he's buying homes. Look at this house. The house that hemp built. Uh huh.

Kulap Vilaysack
Ohai energy vortex. Love it. Central coast, California, also very remote. He's in a gated community. He's like, the hemp girlies are not gonna find me here.

Lacey Moseley
So Anderson also spent $142,000 on shopping sprees at Nordstrom's pottery barn. David Uren, Sephora Ferragamo, William Sonoma, and crate and Barrow. Okay. It feels like a woman is involved here. Cause these are like.

She was like, I need to go to Sephora and get all the drunk elephant. I need all of the Pat McGrath. We gotta fill up that house. Right? So that's why you go.

Kulap Vilaysack
You got all that stuff. Crate and barrel. Also, he's shopping at very, like, non millionaire stores. Like, this is, like, upper middle class, but it's not like, you know, he's not getting, like, a la crosse. Like, you know.

Lacey Moseley
So he's keeping it pretty chill. He also dropped about $8,900 on via rolo dinners. Okay. Fancier. And $1,400 on two trips to Larson's steakhouse.

So he really liked to eat fancy. Okay. So those two trips, he spent dollar, 700. And at steakhouse, that's pretty easy to do, but he likes to eat fancy. When the farmers discovered that their hemp was rotting, the farm was not real.

And the images of Anderson sent out were stock photos. They reached out to the f, the b, and the I again and began an investigation. I know the FBI is sick of mark. They're like, hello? Is it about Mark?

Is it mark? Oh, my God. Hold. We got a special mark line. Press 552.

They gonna take you over there? Because I know they are sick of hearing about him. On April 5, 2024, Anderson, now 69, pleaded guilty to two counts of wire fraud. His sentencing is slated for August 23. Per federal prosecutors, he faces a statutory maximum sentence of 20 years in federal prison for each count.

So this is his. How many times has he been in a prison? Like, he's been convicted, like, four times. Okay. Yeah.

So this will be his third go round in the prison and probably his last, because the maximum is 20 years, though. Okay. I feel like Mark must be living pretty healthy. He might come out of 89 and be like, all right, back to crime. Yeah, exactly.

Kulap Vilaysack
What can I do now? What's up? I never feel like it won't even be something expected. Like the nursing home. Like, yeah.

Lacey Moseley
Now I'm into animal rescue. Yeah. And so he was arrested in May 2023. So he's being held right now in the clink, but he's gonna get sentenced in August of 2024. Oh, man, what a life, right?

Kulap Vilaysack
What a life. I feel like this man has no problem with going to jail. He obviously has clearly very simple pleasures. He went on a few flights. He bought a nice house in Ojai, and then he just went to restaurants.

Lacey Moseley
I feel like he doesn't really need much so he'll be in prison. Like, this is fine. Yeah. What's he doing? What's he up to?

SuChin Pak
To what end? This is the end. This is the end. Then he dies. Okay.

Lacey Moseley
But to make it to 69, scamming this hard, like, he's had a better life than most. And he was living real good until he wasn't. I mean, I guess it's easier than bank robbing. Yeah. I mean, you have to be very charismatic, though.

I can't imagine how many phone calls he takes a day. Yeah, he's rolling calls, and it has. To be, like, after a while, upset people because he's not returning on investments, he's stealing people's hemp, not giving people eye surgery. You know, like, everyone who calls him has to be angry. I feel like his life has to be, like, what it's like to work at the front desk of, like, spirit airlines, where, like, every customer is angry when they meet you.

Like, that's his phone. Every time he pick it up, it's just screams. He just put it on speaker. Like, yeah, no, Ted. But hip is coming, I promise.

Kulap Vilaysack
Doesn't affect him. Has no empathy. He must have fun with it. Oh, yeah. Like, coming up with new lies about where the CBD is.

Lacey Moseley
New lies about why he don't own the building. Like, how savage liars. Yes. He's got a lot. You know what sounds like he has a lot of imagination.

Kulap Vilaysack
You know, he's having a lot of fun. Imagination. I feel like as a kid, he was, like, watching Barney or something, whatever. Came out with kids with him. He's like, let me write that down.

Lacey Moseley
Yeah. Dreams. Imagination. Well, it's like you said, if, like, you know, my american dream is a life of crime. And he lived it.

Kulap Vilaysack
He's living it. He rose to the occasion over and over and over again. He's like, I like what I like. Right? He said, I'm not gonna let little prison get in my way.

Lacey Moseley
Ain't no problem. No problem. I take a little hiatus. I take a sabbatical. That's right.

It's a retreat, if anything, I relax my mind, and then I get focused on my next crime. That's right. And every time he came out, he did it a little better. I'm so happy that he learned from his mistakes. Like, he showed Birdman some oil.

Kulap Vilaysack
He showed. Yeah. Yeah. You know. Oh, man, thank you so much for being here.

Lacey Moseley
This was a thrill. So entertaining to learn so much about you, truly. I told you so much. And I loved it. Loved every second of it.

Truly. Oh, my goodness. So we always ask at the end of the show, where would you like to be found? Find me and the glorious american icon, suchin Pak. Yes.

Kulap Vilaysack
On add to cart, on lemonade, wherever you get your fine podcast, like the one you're listening to right now and on Instagram. Add to cart pod. I'm cool up. Suchin isuchin. Yes.

Lacey Moseley
And y'all go over there. They've won so many top ten comedy podcasts by Vulture. They got Webby signal awards, best lifestyle podcasts, and y'all were nominated for best beauty and fashion at the 2024 I Heart radio Awards. Okay, they got great guests. Jada Pickett Smith, Jason Manzoukis.

Y'all get over there. It's cute. Add to cart. We'd love to have you on. I would love to come.

Oh, my goodness. Then y'all gonna learn way too much about me and my shopping habits. Oh, yeah. It's so intimate, right? It is.

Yeah. Okay. Yes. Must. And as always, y'all, scamgottis, podmail.com.

Stitch on your friends families and your enemies over there. And then y'all, in the footnotes, pre order. My book scam got us. Okay, we trying to hit that bestseller list, y'all. It comes out September 10, 2024.

And y'all know I'll be all around these cities selling this book like a bruh man come this month. So if you see me in your city, also pull up to a signing. Okay? Yes. And if you wanna follow the show and see the images of this perfectly shaped head of marks, you can go to scam goddess pod on Instagram.

If you want to talk to me, scam goddess pod on Twitter. And if you want to see me and my personal shenanigans. D I v a l a c I D. Valacey on all platforms, y'all, if you're out here May 10. Netflix is a joke.

I'm doing a London Hughes and friends show in Los Angeles, so get your tickets to that. That's me doing stand up. Did I tell y'all? Doing stand up. I've been doing a lot of stand up.

So come watch me just talk non stop, incessantly. Yes. All right, congregation, y'all get out there. And y'all stay marking. Okay?

You can have anything you dream about, even crime. Live your dreams of this uplifting.

I've got it.

This has been an earwolf production in association with Team Coco, scammed by the stars, and is hosted by me, Lacey Moseley, aka hey, scam goddess. Our producer is Judith Cargbo, and our audio engineer is rich Garcia. Research for the show is done by Kalin Brandt. Stay scheming.

Go spread the word. When you get a fresh, hot McCrispy from McDonald's and you can feel the heat coming through the bag, don't try. To wait till you get home. Always respect hot chicken. The McCrispy only at McDonald's.

Meet the next generation of podcast stars with SiriusXM's listen next program presented by State Farm. As part of their mission to help voices be heard, State Farm teamed up with SiriusXM to uplift diverse and emerging creators. Tune in to stars and stars with Esa as host Issa Nakazawa dives into birth charts of her celeb guests, this is just the start of a new wave of podcasts. Visit statefarm.com to find out how we can help prepare for your future. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

Elbows & Assholes w/ SuChin Pak & Kulap Vilaysack

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1: Introduction to Scams

2: Family Stories

3: Cultural Perspectives

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