Andrew Santino on Caleb Williams Draft, John Cena Down Under & Jason's Stand-Up Future | Ep 87

This episode features comedian Andrew Santino discussing various topics, including the NFL draft, John Cena's activities in Australia, and Jason Kelce's potential stand-up career.

1. Andrew Santino provides insights into his interactions with John Cena during their time in Australia, highlighting Cena's professionalism and approachability.
2. Santino discusses his comedic influences and aspirations, revealing his passion for making people laugh and lightening life's darker moments.
3. Jason Kelce's anecdote about sleeping in the snow adds a personal touch to the episode, showcasing the hosts' willingness to share private life moments.
4. The discussion about Caleb Williams' draft prospects in the NFL adds a sports-analytical dimension to the conversation.
5. The episode provides a behind-the-scenes look at Santino's podcasting process and his collaboration with other comedians.

1: Introduction

The hosts welcome Andrew Santino and set the tone for a diverse conversation, ranging from NFL drafts to personal anecdotes. Travis Kelce: "Let's dive into the laughter and stories that Andrew brings with him."

2: Caleb Williams Draft Discussion

A detailed analysis of Caleb Williams' potential in the NFL draft, with insights from all participants. Andrew Santino: "Caleb's talent is undeniable, and he's going to shake up the draft board."

3: John Cena's Adventures Down Under

Santino shares amusing and insightful stories about working with John Cena in Australia. Andrew Santino: "Cena is as professional as he is large, truly a big presence on and off the set."

4: Comedy and Career Reflections

Santino reflects on his career path, comedic influences, and aspirations, providing a deeper understanding of his work and personality. Andrew Santino: "Making people laugh is not just a job; it's a way to lighten the world's burdens."

5: Jason's Stand-Up Potential

Discussion about the potential for Jason Kelce to explore stand-up comedy, sparked by his humorous anecdotes. Jason Kelce: "Maybe I should hit the stage, see if I can get some laughs too!"

1. Explore Your Passions: Like Andrew Santino, don't be afraid to pursue what makes you happy, even if it seems daunting at first.
2. Be Professional: Emulate John Cena's professionalism in every endeavor.
3. Share Personal Stories: Use personal anecdotes to connect with others, as demonstrated by the hosts.
4. Evaluate Opportunities: When opportunities like the NFL draft present themselves, analyze them critically to make informed decisions.
5. Collaborate and Learn: Always be open to learning from others' experiences and insights, whether in your career or personal life.

92%ers we are back with another special guest episode of New Heights sponsored by Buffalo Wild Wings. Let’s Go Sports Bar! In this episode, we welcome comedian, actor, fellow podcaster, and Bad Friend Andrew Santino.
The guys get into Andrew’s snowy first impression of Jason, the origin of his “Cheeto” nickname, how Bobby Lee ruined the Bad Friends tour bus, Andrew’s wild Vegas golf outing with Justin Timberlake and Jimmy Fallon, and the exotic cuisine he tried down under with John Cena.

We also get to Travis’ “Fall Out Boy” incident when he guested on Santino’s show, discuss which comedians could make it in the NFL, the time Andrew punk’d Taylor Swift and Drake, and because this is football show we do eventually discuss the upcoming NFL draft.

There are also great stories about Pat Mahomes and his love of Coors Lights, Rob McElhenney donating a golf club to the LA River, some confusion over George Washington’s hair color, and of course, everyone’s favorite conspiracy theories.

We will be back with more New Heights every Wednesday during the offseason so make sure you’re subscribed to our YouTube Channel and wherever you get your podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and follow us on Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok for all the best moments from the show.

People

Andrew Santino, Jason Kelce, Travis Kelce, John Cena

Companies

None

Books

None

Guest Name(s):

Andrew Santino

Content Warnings:

None

Andrew Santino
You set up your wifi in your garage. That's where the attachment point is. But you could have said, put it somewhere else. I just haven't changed it yet. That's such an Ed Kelsey move.

Travis Kelce
I'll get around to it. It's like that second floor bathroom that's still not done. We had to watch dad take shits with his newspaper because he took the door off the hinges. Like, somebody bought a second floor bathroom in Cleveland Heights that a twelve year old soldered the pipes. 90% sure.

Jason Kelce
I didn't know how to solder anything properly. This is so good. Like, why the fuck is the pipes jacked up here on the second floor every week? Something's wrong with that bathroom. What could be the problem?

Andrew Santino
It's like a twelve year old soldered this thing together.

Travis Kelce
Welcome back to new heights, ladies and gentlemen, presented by wave sports and entertainment, and brought to you by Buffalo wild wings. Let's go, sports bar. A true, true american sports fan would know how to react to that just by hearing the intro. We are your hosts. I'm Travis Kelsey.

This is my big brother, Jason Kelsey out of Cleveland Heights, Ohio. New episodes come to you guys every Wednesday. Subscribe on YouTube and wherever you get your podcast. Follow the show on all social media at new heights. Show with one s.

But check out our official fan club@newheightshow.com. We've got a very, very special episode for you guys today. Jason, why don't you do the honors and let the people know what they got coming up. That's right. We got an amazing episode for you, 92 percenters.

Jason Kelce
We got the one and only stand up comedian, actor and podcaster out of Naperville North High School. Yeah, Naperville. You might know him from his stand up hit specials, home field advantage and cheeseburger. Or his acting roles on Dave I'm dying up here. And Ricky Stanicki, he is also the host of hit podcast Whiskey Gingerbread and bad friends with Bobby Lee.

And he finally stopped dodging our calls and agreed to stop our podcast this week. Please, everyone, welcome Andrew Chino Santino.

Hell, yeah. By the way, the b dubs intro. Great, man. Dude, you were right on cue. Let's go.

Travis Kelce
You were right on cue. Didn't even. We should go right after this. Can I say the first time I met Jay, by the way, can I say this real fast? Yeah.

Andrew Santino
That was burned into my memory when you were like, yeah, my brother's gonna be there. You're gonna meet my brother. And it was at your house, and we're partying. We were hanging out in the basement. We were kicking it, having a great night, and I wanted to go upstairs to go make a phone call, so I wasn't near the noise.

And I see you. Jason was outside. It was snowing. I remember that. And he was laying outside on one of your, like, one of your deck chairs, sleeping in the snow as it was snowing in a t shirt and shorts, sleeping in the snow.

And I was like, hey, brother, you. You good? And he didn't. He was like. Like that.

I go downstairs. I go, trev, your brother is sleeping in the snow. And he goes, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's where.

Travis Kelce
That's where he belongs. It's like, no big deal. He's like, yeah, leave him alone. Leave the bear alone. That's what you said.

Andrew Santino
Leave the bear alone, man. Don't wake the bear. Whatever you do, don't wake the bear right now. You were passed out in the snow, but I. You were just catching.

You were just catching a break from the party. You just wanted to break off, cool off a little bit. You were. He was overeating. It was snowing.

It was snow. Pouring snow. He was heating up too much. I had to go back in the bears elements, get in here, and mini hibernation. That was a great intro to you, though.

I was like, I know exactly who he is now. I get it. He leaves the party to sit in the snow. I get it. He had to regroup, man.

Travis Kelce
That's how. That's how s Kelsey's regroup. Just take a step outside and just fall asleep. I do love that dude. I'm sorry we had to call you out with Dave.

Dave on the other week. I don't know if you caught that. Well, I got some fun with it. But, yeah, I mean, it worked. Yeah.

Andrew Santino
I got tagged. I got tagged through. Dave, you had my old boy on the show. He did a good job. I listened.

I listened. And also, him being a Philly guy, he was. I know he was amped to come see you guys and kiss the ring a little bit, so he was pumped. It was so cool having him on here. Conversations we've had.

We got. I have a bunch. I have a bunch about him. Some I can't even share, but off camera, that's the best. Yeah, those are the best.

Travis Kelce
Well, before we get going, um, we talked about this on last week's show. Jason wants to know about the meaning of your nickname, cheeto. So it originated. Uh, people call me Cheeto. Santino.

Andrew Santino
Cheeto. I hear more often than anything now. I'm bad with timelines, but I think, like, 15 or 16 years ago, I moved to LA in zero six. At the end of zero six, and then I was playing basketball. I would play, like, these pickup games.

Uh, we go to, like, these elementary schools, which always is great on the weekends, or go to, like, these, um, local spots in Culver City that were pretty nasty at the time. It was great. Great pickup ball. But I played with a bunch of guys, a couple of guys from the east side, some mexican dudes from East LA, Boyle Heights. Shout out, boy ol heights.

Travis Kelce
Shut up. Boy, oh, boy, ol heights. One day, this kid, Pavi, was looking down at my legs when we were done, and I had short shorts on, like, way above the knee. Old school, you know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

Jason Kelce
Old school gym teacher style. Yeah, in my bird era. Yeah. In my bird era, you gotta be able to move. I want to pivot quick, you know?

Andrew Santino
And he looked down and he's like, damn, dog. I never really, like, seen your legs up close. And I was like, what do you mean? He's like. It's like.

It looks like you ate a bag of cheetos. And then you rub Cheeto dust, like, all over your legs from your fingers. Like, they look like Cheetos, dog. Like, for real. And everybody was losing it.

And then, like, at first I was annoyed and embarrassed, and then when I looked down, I was like, yeah, that is. They do look like Cheetos. They do look like Cheetos. So Cheeto had born from that. And then it just.

I embraced it, and then it stuck. Then it just kind of traveled with me, and I liked it. Then I turned my social into all that, and then. But it never left. It was funny.

At first I was annoyed, and then I thought, nah, you gotta walk. If you don't walk into this, it's worse. Oh, this? You already know. I'm on board with that.

If you don't walk into it, they're gonna cook you even harder. It's gonna get you way worse. Yeah, absolutely. That's. That's playground mentality 101.

Yeah. Embrace it. This playground mentality 101. And I just love that both you and Travis got your nicknames from playing pickup ball. Yeah.

Travis Kelce
Pick up ball, baby. Mine was. That's how Travis got the big yeti. He ran from it for a little bit. He's embraced it now.

Andrew Santino
You can't run away from that, dude. Dude, no way. Embrace it. Dude, it's just a fucking sweater vest. It's just a jersey.

That's right. It's just a jersey, and I gotta own it. Trav, we said skins. Exactly. Sorry.

Travis Kelce
I'll make sure I shave next time. Speaking of sweater vest, trav's the only guy that I know that'll play golf when it's, like, 94 in a multi layered shirt with a vest. Dude, it's insane. You are the only dude I know that can do that. And he wasn't sweating at all.

Andrew Santino
I was drenched. Yeah, underneath, I was sticky. Yeah, it was a little sticky. He was real hot. I don't know how you do that.

Jason Kelce
You just had to be, like, multiple days of, like, drinking benders. So you're just so dehydrated. There's no sweat to come out of the pores. Yeah, nothing could come out. That is true.

Travis Kelce
And that was definitely. Yep. Definitely where we were at. Yep. Every time.

Andrew Santino
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Jason Kelce
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Now for the portion of this ad read label personal experience to be read by town outside of Travis and Jason Kelsey, because we cannot participate. Well, I guess I could, but I'm choosing not to. But you know who can inter? Brandon interbrand. Come on now.

Andrew Santino
Hey, big boy. This price pix must be. I've been just going. Well. Cause look at those biceps.

Okay, I'll give some pics for tonight. Paolo Banchero points. I'm gonna go more. I'm gonna take Jokic points more, and I'm gonna do LeBron James points more. I'm gonna get out of here.

Travis, you can come back. Well, hopefully Brandon did good. And if you wanna start making your own picks, download the app today and use the code. You guessed it, new heights for a first deposit, match up to $100. Again.

Jason Kelce
Download the app today and use code new heights for a first deposit. Match up to $100. Pick more. Pick less. It's that easy.

Travis Kelce
Like I said last week, Jason, I love Tommy John underwear. It's so soft and comfortable and so light, I can't even feel them on right now. Jason, it's obvious. I love this underwear. But you said you, you were going to give them a go last week, and I gotta ask, have you tried it yet?

Have you tried Tommy John yet? Tried them out. Ooh. Can you give us a nice review? I tried them out at the Chris long golf.

Jason Kelce
What I really like about them is that it's standard spandex on the legs. Good for no chafing the rear end. I don't know if you can see this, but it's mesh. So very breathable in the rear end and frontal area. It's tight on, on the package, which, if it's tight on me, it's gonna be tight on nearly everybody.

And I brought this. So I have a buffalo testicle scrotum sack that somebody sent me. So I thought I'd show you just how tight it is. Yeah. There's just not any bulge.

It's just you need it to be able to rest into it, you know? I mean. Yeah, well, I'm just saying, outside of that, it was fantastic. Did you chafe? No.

Zero chafing. Just a little snug. Just a little snug on that region. But outside of that, good. And also, they packed in some sleep shorts.

Love the sleep shorts. Very good. All right. Sounds like you're starting to realize Tommy John has changed the game. With a few tweaks here and there, they could be perfect for your nutsack.

Travis Kelce
And with their perfect fit and great support, I'm not surprised. If any of our 92 percenters want to try Tommyjohn, go to tommyjohn.com and use the code. You guessed it, new heights for 20% off your first order. Again, that's tommyjohn.com, new heights. And use code new heights for 20% off that first order.

Jason, are you loving your new La Z boy? Yeah. Nice. So am I. It's really the cadillac of chairs, isn't it?

Jason Kelce
It sure is. But I've been wondering something this whole time. If the chair was meant for my retirement, how did you get one? I don't know. Our friends over at La Z boy offered me one.

Travis Kelce
So I said, you know what? How can I turn that down? I was the one that came up with the idea. You know who else they're giving them away to? Two lucky people who enter the new heights.

La z Boy giveaway. No way. How about that? Here. That 92 percenters, you have a chance to win a custom made La z Boy recliner.

Jason Kelce
As we said before, you don't need to be an athlete to enjoy some well deserved recline time. All you have to do to enter is follow La z Boy on Instagram like and comment on a la z Boy post promoting this giveaway. And then, bam, you're in. That's right. Enter the new heights La z Boy giveaway now through May 1.

Travis Kelce
And while you're at it, check out La z Boy.com, or stop into a local La z Boy retailer to test one of these bad boys out and all their other great furniture, too. We've always been lazy boy fans, and now you will be as well. Welcome aboard. Long live the lazy. Let's get to Vegas, though, man.

You just wrapped up bad friends. Yeah. Vegas. Yeah. We did our last awesome.

Andrew Santino
Me and Bobby Lee were touring our podcast, bad friends live. My boy legend. We're done. I think we did 50. The number is off.

But we've been touring for just over a year. Just a calendar year passed a couple weeks ago, and Vegas was our last show. 50 some odd shows. It was. Been an incredible run, man.

It was. It was just. It was insane. We had a proposal. We had a proposal on stage.

Travis Kelce
Hell, yeah. Guy propo. I mean, that was actually our fourth proposal of the tour. But this guy proposed to you? He proposed to his wife, but.

Andrew Santino
Oh, I would have taken it. Well, his. His soon to be wife. I was thinking that Bobby was gonna propose. That's what Bobby would propose to me.

But I don't know if I could be married to him. I don't. I just don't know. He'd be a fun hookup, you know, in. In, fuck, marry, kill.

He would. He would be just fuck. Not marry. Sometimes kill. Yeah, yeah.

No, but, yeah, we finished a long tour. Fuck, then kill. Yeah. Fuck, then kill. But, you know, if it's Bobby on the show, he'd be like, kill, then fuck.

Yeah. That's what he was. Lunatic. Yeah. With the tour was incredible, man.

It was so fun. It was, like, there, you know, not to be corny, but seeing the fans connecting with the fans on that level, it brings you a new level of appreciation. I know you guys feel it in sports. It's just so wild. These live events, there's something that happens when you get to see their faces and feel their energy.

I don't know. It's unbelievable. And for people to tell you things like, dude, you make my work commute so much easier. Or, dude, I'm going through a divorce, or, dude, I'm going through a breakup, or something tragic happened. I lost my mom.

And when they tell you that, you're the thing that gives them a little bit of peace during the week and happiness and loot. It does, it really, truly does do something to you. I don't know what it is, but you're like, man, it's totally worth it to change people's shitty day. I mean, it's awesome. It's great.

Travis Kelce
I love to hear that, man. I'm glad you're in it for the right reasons, too, because that's how, you know, you do this shit for the right reasons, man. Yeah. I want to make, my only goal when I was a kid was like, I wanted to be a professional comedic personality. I wanted to be an actor and a stand up.

Andrew Santino
And I didn't know if either of them would even work. And all I wanted to do was make people laugh. I wanted to make people laugh and feel good. Cause the world is dark and weird. And I was like, how can I break this up and get.

Make a living having fun and making people kind of forget about all the, you know, nonsense of the world? And we did it. Look at us. Look at us. We did it, baby.

Boys, we're here. We're doing it. We're doing it. What did, did you have anybody looking up to or that you were young, that you looked up to? Like, what were the comedic people that you thought like, man, that guy's.

I mean, when I was a kid, where I want to be, it's a, it's a, you know, my first answer is so, like, I mean, Eddie Murphy was like, I don't. I mean, you know, it was. Everyone will say that most likely in my generation, you know, I'm 40, the nineties. Eddie Murphy. Yeah, it was just, he was unbelievable.

He was everything to me. And, yeah, Jim Carrey, I would say was like, from the acting side was my guy, you know, like that. I wanted to emulate or be like, even though he was a stand up. But I, as a kid, I only knew him as an actor. I was too young to know him as a stand up.

But Eddie was that guy to me, that was, like, so wild and free and, yeah, I wanted to, I wanted to have that energy. I knew I could never be that, but I was like, whatever that is, I love that. Yeah. Cause he's having. He was.

He always looked like he was having fun. Yeah. Which that turned me on the most. That stand ups that look like they were also having fun was like, kind of what I wanted it. Like they were in with you on it, you know?

Travis Kelce
Hell, yeah. And, you know, that's kind of what turned me on the most. But, yeah, him and Jim Carrey I think were the two dudes that I was like, God, I want to be that so bad. I want to be that. Kind of have that energy with people and have that influence in comedy, brother, you definitely.

Andrew Santino
Thank you, bro. I'm trying. I remember the first time I saw you live, and it was in Kansas City at the amphitheater. That's right. And it was.

Travis Kelce
It was when you're on tour with Rogan, right? With Rogan. Yeah. Paul, that's me calling you, probably. Hello, Travis champion.

Jason Kelce
Are you kidding me? Is it? We should pick it up. Real. Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up.

Travis Kelce
Hey, Chandler. I'm sitting here on the podcast with a Cheeto Santino right now. Oh, you're with that little stick of big red gum. What's up? Spicy.

So spicy. You already know. We. We were. We were just about to get into how you won the tournament.

Andrew Santino
This. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's talk about it. Too many strokes. I got.

Whatever else you did, you did get too many strokes. You got like nine. I got five. Five aside, you went. You went in with.

Travis Kelce
What'd you go in with? I played as a fucking twelve. It's not my fault Santino thinks he's a scratch. Gives me five aside.

Andrew Santino
You should see this guy swing. It's unbelievable. Oh, it's magical. It's as if. It's as if there's, like, a hinge point at all parts of his body, and it's like snapping into place as he goes back.

Jason Kelce
It's like doing the robot as he's swinging the club. Not only did I get the championships. You know, I got mostly approved player, too, so he dicks. All right. Love you, bud.

Travis Kelce
I'm gonna hit you as soon as I get out of here. Yep. One of the greatest. Chan P. Fuck, yeah.

Damn. I forgot what we were talking about. Oh, me and when I was opening for Rogan and KC. Oh, dude. Yeah.

But I can attest for you being able to give that energy and that feeling. I had mahomes. Join me. This was like a training camp, like getaway. It was like a one day just happened to be on the off day, a training camp out in KC.

And me and my homes were like, let's fucking go and do it. We got front row seats to see you just absolutely rip it. It was so fun. It was so fucking fun. You did the one waffle joke.

Andrew Santino
Oh, yeah. I still fucking. Well, it's wild is because Rogan, you know, like, Joe, I was at the time, I was touring. That's five years ago or how many years ago? It's gotta be at least maybe six or seven.

Yeah. And I was touring with Rogan, and Joe loves MMa. You know, he loves everything in the martial art world, but, you know, traditional sports, not. He's cool with. But it's not like his thing.

So I was amped. I was like, dude, the Kansas city Chiefs are, like, coming to see us. Like, we're gonna. I'm gonna. I linked up with these guys.

They're coming to see us. And he was like, oh, cool. Which team are they? I was like, the football team. And he was like, all right.

Word, cool. I mean, like, didn't. It just doesn't mean anything to him. I was amped. Cause, like, they're coming to see us do the boy.

We're in their time. We're in their city. This is perfect timing. And then after that, I was in Dallas and Pat came out with the crew. With the crew.

With the crew to come see me in Dallas. And then after that, you know, tour has been going on and, oh, man, life has changed for the better. It's been amazing, man. Dude, I remember that show forever, man. You absolutely killed me.

It was so fun. That amphitheater's beautiful in case you. Everybody fucking fired up and shout out to Philly. We love Philly. I said that before the show, but every time I play Philly, we get so much love.

We were in the Met last year. Beautiful, beautiful theater, man. It was unbelievable. Yeah, man. Sometimes I'm shocked that they let us into those theaters.

I'm like, we're telling dick jokes inside of, like, an ornately designed, beautiful theater. I'm like, this is so inappropriate for how gorgeous this thing is. It was constructed with such care. You know what I mean? Like, some dude carving the ceiling.

He's like, one day a ginger man will tell a disgusting penis joke in this very room. So it's ridiculous. Willy rocked. Yeah. And the laughs will sound so lovely.

They will bounce off these beautiful walls. They will project perfectly right to this specific point. Yeah, it's been a. It's been amazing. And now I'm touring around, doing.

Getting ready for my hour. I'm gonna shoot another hour in a. In a bit, but I'm getting the hour, like, honed in and all that, so I'm touring. Awesome, man. Yeah, man.

I fucking just. Yet you're let your. Dude, the last cheeseburger was a fucking banger. Thank you. Yeah.

Cheeseburger on Netflix. That was a so much fun, man. That was like, what a fun thing. To do. I shot that in Denver, and that's the same thing.

We, like, coin up an hour over a couple years, and you peel it apart. And some guys, you know, like, some guys back in the day would do two or three years. Then for, like, Chappelle and Louie, it was like, every year. And now people are back to a couple years to kind of, like, pace it out. I think for a minute, those guys were, like, competing over, like, who could do it, who could do it, who could do it.

And then the younger guys, we were like, I'll chill out a little bit. I'm good. I need to break myself, you know? I love how you brought it full circle with the cheeseburger, though. No?

Yeah, yeah. You just want to be enjoyed. I just want to be enjoyed. I named that cheese the cheeseburger because I just. It was a real conversation I had with my wife about having, like, a, you know, a tough time mentally, which we all go through.

I was like, I just want to be a cheeseburger. I just want people to enjoy me right now while they have me. I don't need some, you know, I don't need some great stamp by the world. I just want you to, like, have fun right now. Cause life should be, to me, living right now.

It's tough to live for any other time. So that's what that whole thing was about, you know, it's like, just have fun right now. This. You have no idea what. When it's gonna go or, you know, how you go, so you can't be looking so far in the future.

The whole thing was, when you eat a cheeseburger, you're just enjoying it now. You're not thinking about anything other than that. Yeah, so it. I don't need, I don't want the trophies or the statues, especially if the statue looks like Alan Iverson.

Travis Kelce
The statues can go one way or the other, bro. Some of them are so good. Some of them, you're like, all right, all right. They love you. They love you.

Andrew Santino
I mean, like, if they made a statue of you guys, I mean, don't you want pre approval? Doesn't that. Don't you want to go? Can I take a look at the drawings? It's like getting a tattoo without them putting the stencil on.

I'm always like, free hand. Are we freehand the statue? You're gonna freehand the statue? I think we should lay it out first. We don't have a machine that can.

Make this, like, wait, we can 3d print? Yeah. Yeah. Well, like, Jordan statue when they put that up outside the United Center, I remember that was like, mixed reviews. Cause I'm from Chicago, and that was like, some people loved it, some people didn't like it.

But they're never gonna look that much like you do. You know what I mean? Like, it'll be close, but it can't be. What, so don't expect anything. Yeah.

Yeah. So, Jason, don't expect anything. I kind of prefer don't expect your. Statue to look anything like you out there. Yeah.

Jason Kelce
No, if they ever do, I hope it looks much better looking. But shout out to Allen Iverson, you. Know, he's got a man. But it was a strange statue. Let's be real.

Andrew Santino
It was whistle. It was like a mini me version. It was a little while you were. Just about to talk about you're. You're building out a new special.

Jason Kelce
You're getting ready for you another hour. Right? What. What's that process, like, how long are these jokes, I mean, being tested out before you've figured out what that run a show looks like? Yeah.

Andrew Santino
So it's, you know, everyone has a different process. There is no, there is no, like, we all do this, but uniform, not at all. Some guys, you know, I'm doing a club run, you know, and then I'm gonna go play theaters when it's. When it's really cooked. But right now I'm doing clubs to do four shows.

Two Saturday, two Friday, two Saturday. Sometimes I'll do six, depending on the city. Like Dallas. I sold out six quickly. Cause Dallas is great for, like, I mean, that city I always do well in, and I like the club a lot, so I was like, I'll just do that.

But I like to just peel it out and it'll. It takes me, you know, this. This will have been almost a year, and I'm. I've have the hour that I think I want to present. And then I'll go to the club and kind of start to puzzle piece it together in terms of, like, this should go here.

I want this here. And then slowly stack it, listen to my setback, write it down, you know, and go back and forth and then change it the next night. And the next night, maybe go back to the first one and see how it. How my timing works and see goes how it's fascinating. Yeah, it's weird.

And there's no. There's no one way, truly. Like, I have friends that do it that, you know, like, Shane Gillis is a good homie, and, like, he's doing it on tour now. Beautiful because he just. Yeah, beautiful dog.

Such a good special. And he's doing it now on his new tour in theaters, peeling in the new stuff that he's got and then also doing a set that he already knows he has. So I, everyone has a different process, but for me, I'm just gonna do a club run and then I'm gonna do theaters probably in the fall to get ready. Ready to record maybe. I think December or January, I'll record it.

Travis Kelce
Do you think you'll go back to the hometown? I don't know where I'm gonna record this one. Man. That's so funny. They asked me, I'm actually doing it with, I feel like I can say this.

Andrew Santino
I'm doing it with Omaha productions with. Oh, nice. Over in Omaha, the big dow. So we have a meeting coming up about where we wanna shoot it. I'm still lost in the sauce.

I don't know. I just can't, I haven't pinpointed where I want to do it, but I do think it's going to be in the midwest. I will say that I'm almost positive it's going to be in the midwest. Yeah, midwest, guys. Keep it home.

Yeah, maybe keep it back home. Back to that process. Do you enjoy working the clubs, trying new material in that, like, smaller, intimate vibe more? Or do you like the, the big produced big show, stadium vibe? Big shows are good when you have the thing to give them.

You know, it's almost like, I don't know if you're like, if, you know, when the kids put on like a show during the holidays for the adults, you know, like when the kids are like, all right, we're gonna. You guys wanna watch us perform the thing? It's like, that's what it feels like when we go do theaters that you're like, I wanna show them. I wanna show mom and dad the thing now. We were in the cousin's room.

We were preparing the speech and the song and the things. That's what it feels like. And the clubs feel like to warm up. I mean, it's still, it's not like that's less of a show. It's just way more intimate and loose and kind of, you know, it's kind of more fun.

It's kind of like when you're drunk making a meal, when you're like, ah, we'll see if this works. We'll see if this works. How does that taste? And then, you know, and then the theaters are more like a sit down dinner where you're like, this is prepared. It's tight.

It's more concise, you know, for me personally, again, but that's. Everyone's so different, but that's how I'd like to do it. Hell, yeah. Do you. You talked about doing the tour this past set of shows, you guys talked about going on a bus.

Oh, my God. Did you guys end up doing the tour bus? Yeah, we did the tour bus. We did it for the first half, and then that was it. I gotta tell you.

That was it. They were like, do you want the bus for the second half? I was like, no, I think we're gonna fly. I think we're gonna fly. We know there's no.

Everyone knows the rule of tour buses. There's no pooping on the bus. That is a fact. It's been that way since the seventies. Bobby.

Bobby Lee. Bobby Lee clearly was the first one to poop on the bus. I wish Vegas had a money line on it. I would have. I would have bet so big.

Jason Kelce
Yeah. I mean, but the bus driver, we had this dude. He was so funny, man. He was so wild, and he's like, I'm just gonna be real with you. If y'all poop on the bus, y'all are gonna be smelling it for a long time.

Andrew Santino
And I was like, let's not poop on the bus, please. Of course. Yeah. Bobby pooped on the bus. Without a doubt.

He's like, we couldn't stop. It was two in the morning. He wasn't going to pull over. Blah, blah. All these excuses, which I know wasn't true.

I know he pooped in the afternoon, and he just lied to me. Yeah, it was 02:00 p.m. Not 02:00 a.m. He was just switching his head. But the bus.

Life is crazy because you live in these coffins, you know, which actually are more comfortable than you think. They call them these coffins. They're like bunks. Yeah, they're not that bad. You feel kind of, like, snuggled it, like, burritoed in a little bit.

Jason Kelce
Interesting. I slept in the back for a bunch of it, and there was, like, a bedroom back there, but small. And I hated it. The bunks are a little bit nicer. Cause there's a dump bunk where you put all your stuff in, and then you sleep in those little.

Andrew Santino
They're little comfort, you know, little, like, tiny comforting sleeping bags on them. Just little nooks. Little nooks. And then you can put your iPad up. They've got these clips.

You could put your iPad on the ceiling and watch tv shows and movies. Yeah, it's actually kind of nice. They have little speakers and fans, and it's kind of cool. It's kind of a little getaway. But the worst part is doing a show, doing the meet and greets and all that stuff.

You got to eat fast, pack up, then get on the bus immediately because you have to drive to the next city. So you're sleeping through the night, and then you're waking up in Oklahoma, then you're waking up in KC, then you're waking up in Indianapolis. So that's a little tough on the. On your body clock. It stinks.

You got to wake up. I would try to get a workout in, then go to lunch, write and organize, do sound check, and then you're at the venue, so there's not a ton of, like, kick at time. It's kind of tough. It's a little tough for you. That's why the planes are so much easier.

It's more expensive to jump the whole crew on a plane and go, go, go. But it's worth it, man. Cause the buses are. They're tough. They're tough.

It's tough, dude. I can only imagine, especially on enters, when you're going through the middle of the country and this is, this is you all night long on the bus. All night, dude. I mean, it's like being out at sea. I mean, like all night.

You're like this because the buses are so top heavy. Any bit of wind, they shake the whole night. And if the road is a little bumpy, no bueno. It's not good. Yeah, it's not good.

They're hard to pee in the middle of the night. You're holding onto the wall. Yeah, it's going everywhere, dude. Before we get out of Vegas, we got to give 08:00 a.m. Golf a shout.

Travis Kelce
They always have fun ish tournament. I was pissed I couldn't make it. This year, but we were mad you didn't come back. The returning champions didn't return, which is a little strange. Well, yeah, Pat didn't do the past two years.

I at least came back last year and tried to run it up with a champion. Fell short to Timberlake and Fallon. For all of you that don't know, 08:00 a.m. Golf is Timberlake's big deal that he has out in, has out in Vegas every single year. Wynn Golf Club and, man, is it a fucking good time.

Andrew Santino
It was so fun, man, looking at. All the videos from over the weekend. I know. I missed a good one. Yeah, Jimmy went.

Jimmy went off. He threw a drone in the wall, which it started. He threw one of the flags. I think he threw the flag on the 17th green in the water. Dude, he's.

And then he threw the drone in the water. You know, that's my lake. Lake Travis. Travis. Yeah, I know where he threw my putter.

Travis Kelce
He's got a fucking. God damn it, Jimmy, control yourself. He can't. Dude, he was out of control, but he was. They were having.

Andrew Santino
We played them the second round. It was me and C league. Me and Courtney Lee played in the second half. We played them, and we did great. It was just.

I was giving Chandler shit because him and Blake Griffin got, like, 30 strokes. I was like, how can I beat the guys who stroke on every hole? But it was so much fun, man. Yeah. And it keeps getting better.

Travis Kelce
There's more and more. Oh, dude. Just good people that come every single year. It was stacked. It was stacked with, like, so many fun, cool, and good golfers.

Andrew Santino
Like, surprisingly, more people that were good than I knew how good they were until they showed up. And I was like, Pelsi's always out there. We played him and Brian, and I can't remember his last name from the office. I can't remember his last name. I always forget it, too.

It's not bomb, is it? Bomb gardener, right? Yeah, that's right. Yeah. I think I still owe him from.

Yo, you don't owe him anything. Tahoe. He went off gambling, by the way. He went, dude, that guy goes, he killed off. I see him out in Tahoe, always ripping it.

Yeah, he's like, do you want to come play with us? And I was like, I'm gonna go to the $50 tables. I don't think my residuals are as good as yours, buddy. So I went. I went over to little baby tables, but they were going.

I mean, they were gambling, gambling. And then we played them in the second round. And on 18, there was a couple of, like, fans or sponsors or whatever behind us. And the guy was like, how you guys doing? I said, good.

And he goes, do you know? Do you know, do you know him? And I go, yeah, he's a swimmer. I think that guy's a swimmer of Alphelps. He goes, no, I know that.

I go, yeah. I think he was like, in the Olympic. I don't know what I think. He's an Olympic guy. I think he's an Olympic guy.

And the guy got annoyed. He was like, no, I know that. I'm saying did you guys know each other before? Are you american?

I said, yeah, I think he's got a bunch of the neck danglies that they give you. Yeah, the lanyards. Yeah. Yeah. So it was fun overall, man.

It was so much fun. We had. It was a great time and a good group of people. And I'm taking a break from drinking for a little while because. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

Travis Kelce
That'll be me next week. Next week. 15 of them. My homies. Papa homes has his, which I'm missing.

Andrew Santino
For the first time in four years. I'm not happy over a shadow, man. Haven't played shadow in a long time, so I'm pumped about now. You're gonna kill it. And I'm pumped to see my dog.

Travis Kelce
All right, well, I at least had to get a give a shout out to 08:00 a.m. For always having a blast. Sorry I couldn't make it, guys. Let's get to. Let's get to Ricky Stanicky.

Andrew Santino
Let's go. Are you kidding me? I was talking to you when you were filming this out in Australia, right? Down and down under. Down under.

My. You're out there playing. Playing on the links out there. I was hitting the sticks. Available now on Amazon prime.

Travis Kelce
Make sure you guys check it out, please. You start alongside Zach Efron, Jermaine Fowler, and John Cena. Yeah, he was great, man. Cena is the best. We had so much fun down there.

Andrew Santino
We shot in Melbourne, or Melbourne, as Americans say it. And Cena, Efron, William H. Macy, and my boy Jermaine was played. You know, me and Jermaine Fowler and Efron played three best friends who make up an imaginary friend as their alibi for all the trouble that they get into as kids. And then our wives and girlfriends are like, I want to meet this dude.

So we have to hire a lunatic to play our best friend. And that's John Cena. So fun, man. Oh, my God. It was one of the most fun times I've ever had.

And shooting it in Australia was wild. I went out with Cena, and we had John likes Guinness. And I'm a whiskey and tequila, you know, I'm a big whiskey guy, and I, like, I'm not really a huge. Not a huge beer guy. I'll have one with you.

But he loves Guinness, and so biggest. Guy in the room loves the most protein. 100%. You gotta keep it. I gotta keep it.

It's chicken and Guinness. My guy, he's stealing. He's stealing protein. So he would say there would be nights where he, he'd shoot me a text and be like, do you want to go have a Guinness? I think I've got a later start.

And a later start for John would be like, 09:30 a.m. You know what I mean? Like, he was so, he's so on top of it. It's unbelievable. Like professionalism.

Through the roof with that. I keep hearing about this through the roof. Dude, he's early prepped beyond prepared. Like, bright eyed, bushy tailed. He's one of those guys.

He's ready to go at all times. There is no excuses with him. Not like that's a talent. Yeah, it's a skill for sure. And then he'd call me and be like, hey, I have a late one in tomorrow.

Do you want to go have a Guinness or two? But with him, it's like, I'm six, 1200 pounds. I'm not a tiny guy, but one or two is the first five minutes. Do you know what I mean? Like, every one Guinness I had, he'd have three.

So I think we went out and ate kangaroo. And had Guinness at a bar. Ate kangaroo. Yeah, we had kangaroo. What are you eating on the.

Jason Kelce
What did that do? Like the tail or thigh? What are you eating? Yeah, I think he eating the chin down here, just down under. I don't know what it.

Andrew Santino
I think we're eating kangaroo backstrap or something. I have no idea what part. I didn't even ask. I didn't ask now what did it taste like? Time out.

Jason Kelce
It's gotta be gamey. Most similar taste. It's gamey of regular animals. It's gamey. Like, dear, you know how deer is?

Andrew Santino
Like how deer. But if you marinate it long enough, it's not. I liked it. I don't know. Like, John didn't like it.

I finished my steak salad. I mean, also I was on five guinnesses, so who knows? Who knows if it was the hunger or if it was that. The beautiful irish. Irish beer.

But at first I was like, do you eat this down here? And the guy was like, kangaroo. You have. Someone has to look this up. They outnumber humans in Australia.

It's like five to one. Oh, wow. Like, I thought, there can't be that many. Is this an endangered thing? They were like, nah, mate, they're everywhere.

They had too many kangaroo. Like, they can't wait for you to eat them. And so, yeah, they don't care. So we ate them and had Guinness. And it was.

John hated it. I loved it. I thought it was so delicious, I would eat it again. But he's a good dude to go out and have one with. And then again in the morning, a pro, like, doesn't miss a beat.

A total pro. So dope. Yeah. Me, on the other hand, I was. Yeah, there was some tough mornings.

Yeah, it was tough. It was tough. But we had so much fun and they were really, really good people and good to. They treated us well. That whole city showed us so much love in Melbourne City.

Travis Kelce
Something about the Aussies, man. They're the best, dude. They are such cool people. Every single time I fucking see what I ran into. Hemsworth.

Andrew Santino
Yeah, one. One night, and it was like I met my long lost brother. Yeah. Within like two minutes, I'm like, dude, we gotta rip it again. Yeah, we don't have enough time right now, so chill.

And so down there's. I don't know, it's a. It is a. It is a great vibe down there. And then we went to Tasmania, which I couldn't recommend more.

I thought that was, like, one of the coolest things. We went to this place called the. The Mona. Mona. The Museum of old and New Art.

Jason Kelce
Oh, cool. And this dude, the story is crazy. This dude was, like, a billionaire gambler who was, like, banned from gambling because he cracked the code. He was like rain man. And then he took all this money and he bought this huge, beautiful house.

Andrew Santino
You'd have to look this up. And it's multiple floors, gotta be three to five floors underground. Everything from, like, Picassos to, like, brand new art. And during the day there's five or six, like, nooks of musicians, artists, painters, performers working on their craft. And then they perform in the evening.

So they're. They're doing it during the day and then you get to see it in the afternoon. And it was one of the coolest things I've ever seen in my life. Like, we watched a harpist write a new song and then she was performing at 430 that night. That's cool.

You watch them work it out and then you get to chill, go have lunch, come back. Yeah, it would do that. We had so much fun down there. I can't wait to go back. Awesome.

Travis Kelce
Whenever I hear a harp going off, it just feels like I start to, like, float it and just start floating. Yeah. Oh, wow. That is what I wanted. When people say, you see the lights when you pass away?

Andrew Santino
I just want to hear a harp. Then I'll be like, all right, it's time. Hit the harp, hit the heart take me to the other place. So good, man. Shout out to Australia for making it.

Home for you guys, showing me a lot of love. And let's move on to some no dumb questions. All right, now it's time to get to our segment. No dumb questions because there's no such thing. Thing is dumb people.

True. True. Just dumb questions. Wait, I had that backwards. There's no such.

Travis Kelce
We'll just keep it going. There is no such thing as dumb people. Definitely. There's definitely dumb people. Just no dumb questions.

Andrew Santino
That's right. Until you hear some of these no dumb questions are sponsored by Tommy John underwear. You never, ever throw on some Tommy John's? Yeah, I mean, I usually freeball, but I'm going to start wearing Tommy John's from now on. We got something about the Midwest crew right here.

Jason Kelce
We just. Yeah, let it fly. I don't, but you guys do. Tommy John makes the most comfortable underwear on the planet. No adjustment needed.

Travis Kelce
No. Sometimes you gotta. No shifting. No shifting. No shifting.

All right, here, let's get to our first no dumb question from Michelle Kintz with a z on instagram. Did Trav really forget his undergarments four years ago when he came on your podcast? Let me tell you something. I got a call. Travis came on whiskey Ginger when I used to shoot it out of my house before we were moving studios.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. And he came to the house we set up at the crib because we were moving, and so it was kind of a tight squeeze and the cameras and the angles, all this stuff. And my editor calls me, and he's like, bro, I don't know how to tell you this, but Travis was falling out of. Out of his shorts. I was like, what are you saying, dude?

Like, why are you being so. I was like, what do you mean falling out of his shorts? He's like, his boys were sliding out. And I was like, oh, no. And he goes, do you want to, like, call him and reshoot it?

And I said, just put a Kansas City Chiefs logo over his package whenever it falls out. I mean, Travis, his boys wanted to make an appearance on whiskey ginger, and I get that, but sometimes they'd slide out. Sometimes they'd go back in the cave. So I said, dude, just throw a logo over it. It'll be really funny.

And, hey, what's that commotion? Yeah, what's going on out there? Laughing at. Yeah, Travis had a couple of fallout. Couple of fallout boys.

And we cut it up. And by the way, that that footage will be available. What's her name? Mackenzie or whatever. Michelle.

Michelle. Michelle. That footage will be available on our Patreon. No, I'm kidding. I'm getting, we're gonna hold off and sell that footage for a lot of money someday.

Michelle. That one is in the vault for life. Yeah. Travis. Travis had a little sideshow.

Travis Kelce
Going to have my Tommy Johnson. No, he did not. No wonder you wear underwear now. I've never had, I've never had that issue. Mine can't fall anywhere.

Jason Kelce
They're adhered. Well, you tape it to your leg. Yeah. Keep it tight.

Travis Kelce
All right. Um, well, it was a fun ass interview. You guys should check it out. So fun. Whiskey Ginger's page.

Our sponsor, Tommy John, heard about this and has given us a care package just for you. Oh, hey. How about that? Whoa. Santino.

It's under my seat. Under your seat. How about this? I didn't know we gave out. Oh, look at that.

Andrew Santino
Wow. Thank you, dude. Free ball and everything. But you, I mean, you got friends. Amazing shit.

The gold standard of underwear. Go there. Oh, nice emergency box. I won't have to shift ever again. Look at that packaging.

These are great, man. Thank you so much. Already know your side. Yeah. I mean, size.

Yeah, they might be my size. We'll find out. We'll find out. You know me, if I free, give me three. I imagine I'm a little smaller than you underwear size wise, just because of.

Yeah, that's it. There's no shifting. Yeah, there's no shifting. No more shifting. Automatic underwear.

Travis Kelce
Yeah. So, thanks, Tommy John, for passing those along. Thanks, TJ. We didn't know you didn't wear underwear. Yeah, no, I do now.

Andrew Santino
I will now. It depends. Honestly, it depends on the season, when it starts to get warmer. I depends on the pants I'm wearing. It's all like when I golf.

I'll be wearing my Tommy John's. There you go. Yeah. You got it. I have.

Jason Kelce
Yeah, exactly. But when I'm around the house or when I'm at work, or when I'm with friends and family, when I'm at a funeral, a wedding. Free ball. But I'll be wearing my, I'll be wearing my tjs when I play sports. I'll let the boys fly.

Travis Kelce
All right, let's move on to our next one from instagram. Not for Andrew, but my husband and I constantly argue about this. Is Travis a ginger? No, you're not. You are.

Andrew Santino
But you are accepted by the community. We had a meeting. Honorary. Yeah. We had a meeting in, what, February this year?

And we voted on you. And you did slide in. You're a brother. You're part of the brotherhood. That's what I'm talking about.

But you are your own animal. You're not one of us. But we do love you and accept you very much. And, Jason, you did get an honorary mention as well, because we do know you'll have specks of red come in your beard a little bit. The rumor is you pluck them, which we're not happy about.

You have to let them stay. You gotta let them stay, dude. But you do get a little bit of a red beard in the summertime. Your beard gets a little red. Yeah.

Travis Kelce
If it gets real long and then the sun hits it. Yeah, I know. Fries that thing. Yeah. Real nice.

Andrew Santino
You look like me if God wasn't messing around with colors. You know what I mean? If he was like, all right, we'll stop playing. We'll make like a. We'll make a good looking version of it.

I was the beta version of it. Yeah. He's like, look at how funny this looks. All right, we'll make a good. We'll make a good one.

We'll make a good one. We'll make a good one. But you're accepted by the brotherhood. Accepted by the ginger crew. Thank you.

Travis Kelce
Thank you. Gossip. I'm so fucking honored. I know, man. It's thinking of all the.

Andrew Santino
It's a big deal. I'm thinking of the community that I'm a part of right now. Scalabrine scouts. Absolutely. That's hitting me.

That's one of our kids. White mamba. Yeah. He is actually one of the. One of the leaders of the conference.

Yeah, he's up top. Him. Ron Howard, although he's lost most of it, but we still recognize him. Cathy Griffin. Carrot top.

Travis Kelce
Swole is a son of a bug. Yeah, well, he's our security. Carrot top works security. I saw him at the Super bowl. Back to.

Jason Kelce
Back to your Chicago roots. What about speaker zero? Yeah, Rodman got. He's. He's definitely in when.

Andrew Santino
When he wants to be, and we just can't argue with him. Yeah, we're not allowed to say anything about that. I don't want him to come beat. Me up because obviously one of the best comedians Chi town, like Bill Murray the best. Like, when Farley and Farrell at the Chicago, like, studio, that was.

So a lot of those guys came through second city in Chicago. Second city. A lot of guys would come to come to Chicago and perform there or, like, start comedy there and then go to, you know, back to New York or LA or whatever. But Second City has cultivated, like, some of the greatest comics of all time. That place in particular, you know, and same thing with, you know, IO improv Olympic.

They, Chicago became this like improv hub and it made some of the greatest of all time. Have you ever, I, Farley, love Chicago so much. I mean, he was a, you know, he went to school in Marquette, Wisconsin, kid, and he loved Chicago. Unfortunately, lost him in Chicago, which stinks. But like, yeah, those, I think a lot of those guys, Chicago feels like a, a smaller New York.

So if you're not ready for New York as a performer, maybe it feels a little bit more homey. It's the midwest and the culture was so thick and rich with, with comedy. And then, you know, people went on to, those guys all went on to SNL and then, you know, the rest. Is did you come straight west coast or did you. I never started in Chicago.

I started stand up when I moved to California. I was, I mean, I performed a little bit in Phoenix when I went to school at Arizona State. The Harvard of the west, baby. And I would shockers building. Yeah, shock him, shock him.

Put him up, shock him up. So, yeah, the Harvard in the desert, I went out there and I did a little bit of stand up. But then when I moved to LA is when I really, so I would say I started in Los Angeles. I would never say I started. I'm not a Chicago comic.

Chicago's home. But how long were you already in the scene out here before you got the role in I'm dying up here? I was, I was always curious. I mean, I, so I moved here in, oh, that was a fucking 0607. Thank you.

0607. And that show was, God, how long ago? Now again, my, my math is, I have bad math. Who knows what year it was. I'm dying up here.

Started in this or 20. Producers thrive. Yeah, they thrive the most. Guys, what does. I'm dying up here.

What year was that in? They, they offer 00:20 17 or 16, 2017. I think we might have filmed it in 2016. So, you know, ten years. You'd been grinding for quite a bit for a decade.

And then I got that show and that show kind of lifted me because it was produced by Jim Carrey and Melissa Leo and Oscar winner was in it. So it just kind of like, dude, I got it. Alfred Molina, man. What was it working with Jim fucking Carey, the man? I mean, Jim, the wildest story is Jim came to watch us at the comedy store perform.

And I was, at first I thought, is this a bad idea or a good idea that he's gonna see us because the store is where we like what we call it, working out. Our local club, we go to work out. That's the gym. We literally refer to it as the gym is like working out new bits and trying new stuff. And, you know, you have off nights and up nights and down nights, but for the most part, as a professional, you're just working out.

He wanted to come see us, and I was a little not nervous, but, like, I was like, is this the right venue for him to see us? Because this isn't. You know what I mean? We're doing our thing. I'm nervous right now for you.

Travis Kelce
Yeah. And sure enough, he came and saw and me and Eric Griffin and Al Madrigal, who ended up being the three stand ups on the show, and everybody had really, really good sets. I mean, the room was hot. Things were really good. And then I think Jim wanted to go back, too, to feel the atmosphere.

Andrew Santino
I mean, he was there. I mean, that was his club, so it was awesome. And then speaking to Jim was amazing. Kind of like learning his insight about comedy and the world and what that club meant to him and what it did to him and what Mitzi kind of did for his life and his career, and it was a dream come true. If the child in me who used to sit in my mom's basement rewinding the vhs of dumb and dumber until it broke with my best friend Sean, could be like, dude, you're going to work with this dude.

One. It was like, mind bending. Yeah, it was far. It was him and Farley, Carrie and far kings were my absolute favorite. I still have all of them on VHS, actually.

Yeah. Oh, I just. Yeah, I went out and got a little 19 inch VHS tv with the. Tv with the VHS. VHS love.

Travis Kelce
And I just fucking, by the way. Those things, for people that don't know the VHS, the VHS that was built on the Tv, it might have weighed 156 pounds. It was the heaviest tv. It was a brick. And it was always really awkward to grab.

Just, like, pick it up. You had to, like, fucking get underneath. You know what it was? It was like a boulder, like a side thigh lift, you know? I hated that.

Andrew Santino
I have. I had one in my. My room at my mom's house for years and years and years. But, yeah, that was a dream come true, man. My favorite thing about those old school tvs, you, is you would literally slap them when they weren't working.

Jason Kelce
And somehow that, like, worked. I still don't know why, on and. Off, but whatever you were kid just fucking smacking. Well, that was our dad. I think that was the top of it.

Andrew Santino
Or dads, they learned that. They're like, I hit. I hit the Tv, I hit the kids. I hit the thing. When the thing doesn't work, I hit it.

It works. The kids, the coffin machine, the Tv. Whenever you go into bits about your dad, I meet. I, like, I feel like we grew up.

They have the same, the exact same mannerisms. If it's. If he doesn't want to do it, just whack him in the head. He'll figure it out. Trust me.

Travis Kelce
Just one good whack. My dad gave all of my friends dads the thumbs up on. If he gets out of line permission, you just fucking whack him. Yeah. What did he say?

Andrew Santino
What did he say? Oh, man. The fear that the midwest fathers put inside of him. I'd get cracked on this. The top of the head was, like, the crack, and you felt it through your spine.

It went into your toes. I used to hate it so much. I knew my dad was angry when he wouldn't say anything. When he. When he would give me, like, the fate, the face of, like, you know, what you did.

You know exactly what you did. It ate me alive. Like, when he yelled, I was like, this is fine. I guess he's gonna be mad. But when he didn't say anything, I was like, oh, man.

Not good. Tighten up. Yeah, that. That, uh, you're not obsessed. Really disappointed in you guys.

Yeah. That's your behavior when, uh, I still. Remember he had, like, a spell where I would, like, try to run away, and he was, if you run away, it's gonna get worse. Get over here right now. Like, the spanking was, like, the ring in, like, lord of the rings, and I was dobby, and I just, like, couldn't, like.

Travis Kelce
So fucking lost where you just went. You really. But what a great trick he pulled. Because if I run away, it's not gonna be worse. You're not gonna catch me.

Andrew Santino
You're not going to catch me with those old knees. I'm out of here, bro. He knew. He knew. He knew.

Good trick. Yeah. Let's do it. Let's do another one of these no dumb questions from reddish on Instagram. Which comedian could get 1 yd in the NFL?

Travis Kelce
Ooh, that's a good one. Which comedian could get one actual yard in the NFL? Meaning as a running back? Yeah. Yeah.

Andrew Santino
I was gonna say as a wide receiver or as a tight end. There could be a couple of people that are pretty as a. But as a back would be tough. Yeah. Cause who's got enough low to the ground energy to be able to do that?

There's a, I would say, gotta be short and stocky. I mean, I would say, sounds like Bob. Bobby Lee. Well, here's why. Bobby Lee would be able to get a yard in the NFL.

They would hand him the ball, he would drop his pants, and everybody would run the opposite way. So he might get a first down until someone is ready to tackle him. That's the only trick he might be able to play. Psychological. Yeah, it's a psychological, but from a physical standpoint, literally nobody.

Nobody would be. I mean, like, what are we even talking about right now? Nobody. Yeah. Not one comic.

The only guy that would be able to trick people would be Bobby with his penis. Yeah. Or he would just run backwards with his butt spread open and they just wobble backwards with the ball and no one would tackle him. Yeah. That's such a Bobby move.

Yeah, he could get away with that. Bobby just called me, by the way. He wants to know where I'm at and what I'm doing. I said, I'm here. You want me to call him real fast?

Hi, guys. Bobby, we love you. Congrats on the tour. Hey, Bob. We said they asked who could, in the NFL, who could maybe in comedy, who could, who could maybe get 1 yd running the football in the NFL?

And we said you, because how would you get the ball and what would you do if you got the ball to run through? To run through the line? What do you think you'd be able to do to get a yard in the NFL? Can I put poo on my helmet? There you go.

You can put poo on your helmet. You could, we said you would get naked, said you'd show your penis and run through the line. I think people would want to tackle me. People would want to tackle you. Right.

Then you're more desirable. All right, I'll call you. I'll call you when I'm out of here. Love you, babe. Bye.

Jason Kelce
And the last one from at indelay on Instagram. Have you told Travis about the time you poo, Taylor? I have seen this. I think he's seen the clip. Watch punk.

Andrew Santino
Yeah, have I even. We got it. You got to see the clip. But it's. We did.

Justin Bieber was hosting that episode. It was a celebrity punking a celebrity. And we did this many, many years ago, I guess Bieber had come back from Japan and he told Taylor to come to his house to set off fireworks off the back of this house that we rented in Malibu. My favorite part about this, by the way, when this clip resurfaced, people were like, that's so mean. This is crazy.

It's like, this is fake. It's a tv show. It's not us. You know what I mean? It's like, jesus, relax.

But Taylor got a call from Justin and was like, come. Come to this new recording studio. And she came down there at the beach in Malibu to just see his new studio and hang out. And he was like, I have these fireworks from Japan. Let's set them off.

And Taylor, obviously, to her credit, who's always on point, was like, I don't know if I want to do that. And then. So we had to put. We knew. We actually knew ahead of time as we wrote the bit, because I wrote this bit, I was like, I was a performer on Punkt, and I also write.

Was writing the show. And I said, if she doesn't want to do it, we have to make it so it's like a button or a thing where it's like an accidental, easy. Like, did you press this? Or whatever? And they set up a rig, a fake rig with buttons on it.

And she did, like, touch one, like, slightly, just goofing around. And it set off a firework, and we had it on a rope line to throw it in the direction of this boat, a big boat out in the ocean. It set the boat on fire, and there was a wedding party on the boat, and I was the groom, and we were dingied to shore with our boat on fire, and we blamed her for ruining our wedding. And that's. I will say this.

I would ask her the truth, but she bought it. I know she bought it because it was chaotic. I mean, the boat was on fire, but it was all professionally done. My favorite part is, people on the Internet were like, oh, yeah, what a waste of money, burning a boat. It's like, we didn't burn a boat.

It's not a real rig. But, yeah, she set a wedding party on fire, and we came to shore with the pastor, myself, the bride, and we were like, you ruined our wedding, Taylor swift. And then my wife, Anne Gregory, was like, maybe it's a sign. Maybe this is a sign I shouldn't marry him. And Taylor was like, no, I don't think that's right.

I don't know if that's right. It was so good. I gotta ask Taya about that. It was so fun, man. It was just, like, such a.

It was a perfect bit that worked some of the bits were so wild and they didn't work. But hers was specifically was great. Cause it was so many moving pieces that kinda came together. Sometimes they don't come together like that, but, like, we. We did one with Drake.

We punked Drake. He thought he was going to meet Vice President Joe Biden at the time, and we put him in the basement of the skirball center. And we had secret service come, like, you know, mirrors in the car, and the dogs and him and his boys were in the car, and he's like, and I was a secret service. I drove them. I was a secret service member.

And he was like, yo, chill. Like, don't. Like, he was being. He was so legit. He was being such a.

He was on his good boy behavior. He's like, don't fuck around with a secret service. Like, don't know jokes. No, none of that shit. Like, he was prepping his boys.

And then we had put a rig underneath his car, kind of like, you know how, like, a self winding watch has a weight that isn't. You know, that when it flips, it spins so it. Oh, yeah, the weight goes. I don't even know what those things are called. I'm too stupid.

But we put that. It put that motor underneath the car, and we put it all over on other cars in this garage. And so we simulated a fake earthquake. So the car was shaking, other cars were shaking, and we make smoke and noise and. And it was all this.

So he was sitting in the car. We just had to keep him in the car so he would feel it shake like it's an earthquake the whole time. And he had a full on panic. Like, Drake, shout out to Drake, being from Canada, he was just like. He was like, yo, yo, yo.

He grabbed onto his boy, held him real tight. It was hilarious, dude. Yeah, use that in the disc, Hendrick, use that in the disc. I'm gonna. I would have.

Travis Kelce
I would have fucking been shitting myself. Oh, dude, he was freaking out. And then we had my wife, who played in the earlier sketch, and she was pregnant, and she came on. She's like, what's going on? So you see this pregnant woman in the middle of an earthquake, and Drake was like.

Andrew Santino
Jake was like, stay away from the car. There's this. The secret service car. You can't come near the car. So funny, dude.

Yeah, we had some wild, wild bits, but, yeah, that one was good. The tail. You have to ask taylor about it. Yeah, I'll see. I'll see if she was trying to sell it or not.

Yeah, she might have been. I don't know. When I saw it, I thought I bought it. I bought anti. Yeah, we did.

They did it right. Yeah. Well, that does it for no dumb questions. Brought to you by Tommy John. Thank you, Tommy John, for the free draws.

Jason Kelce
Thank you, guys. All right now, Travis, time to talk about our next sponsor, Buffalo wild Wings. Hey, Trav. All right, now, let's go. And by that, I mean let's go and get some takeout from buffalo wild wings.

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Travis Kelce
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Head to shadyrays.com and use code new heights for 50% off two or more pairs of polarized sunglasses. Let's move on to some more stand up man. Alright, let's, uh, talk about your stand up career a little bit more. We like to ask the football guests what your welcome to the NFL moment. What would you say was your welcome to stand up moment?

Andrew Santino
That's a good question, I think. Or welcome to comedy moment. Yeah, I think a big moment in my comedy life. And there's been so many, honestly, there's moments where you go, wow, this is amazing, this is amazing. I can't believe that.

But I think the earliest one would be the first club to pass me was the Hollywood improv, the historic Hollywood improv, and they passed me and this is wild. I can show you. This is the craziest thing. I was in Las Vegas visiting my friend Sean, that guy that used to watch dumb and dumber with me. He was living in Vegas for a stint because he took a job out there.

And I have it right here on ten. It's the oldest email I kept. 1016, 2009 from the Hollywood improv. Hello there, let me know. This is your first paid set as a regular.

And I was the first person on the list. And it was from 1016, which is my birthday. Nice. I got my, I got this email on my birthday from Eric, the old booker at the Improv. It was meant to be and this was a moment, I was in Vegas and my mom was there and my best friend's mom was there, they were visiting him and we were all having like a family.

And that was like a, I don't know, that was just a really amazing, important moment in my life that it was like, wow, okay, I finally get to work at this club, you know, and it wasn't like that, was it? You know what I mean? That was just my end. Like, you're in now. Now you get to try to come work and keep your spot and perform every week and see if we let you come back and see if we book you.

So it's kind of like a testing ground, but they're saying yes to you getting in, and that was a massive moment. Then when the store passed me right after that, and then, you know, little moments like that. But that one was something special. That was, like, really wild to receive that on my birthday. That's cool as fuck.

Yeah, that. It's like, you're now gonna be accepted into the lineups. You can call in and request spots. You doesn't mean you would get them. Yeah, but you'd say, hey, I'm available.

I would love to work if I can work. So. Yeah, and that's so fucking. That's the grind forever. That's what you had to do for years and years and years and try to keep your spots, and it's just like, what you guys had to do.

It's like, if you don't perform, you may not play. Yeah. You know, I mean, to the big leagues, man. Yeah, you have to perform. She's dope.

Yeah, it was cool, man. Right. That was, like, my entry level to, in sports terms, that was the. That was the farm league. You know what I mean?

That I was. I was in the farm league, and getting brought up means you get to be on the big shows, and then sometimes you go back down to the farm leagues for a little while.

Travis Kelce
I mean. Yeah, gotta keep. That was. That was the coolest because we used to have a. I think it was AAAA team just outside of Cleveland called the Lake Erie captains.

And whenever, like, a guy was kind of coming off an IR or, like, kind of just wanted to, like, get a swing back or something, like, I remember Omar Vasquel playing for the captains for, like, two games, and I just happened to be going out there because the tickets were $5, and it was fun way to play it, like, watch a baseball game and hang out. And I'm honestly just like, fuck around as a kid. Yeah. And I got to see Omar Vasquez play in the Lake Erie captains, and it was like, what the fuck? Even the big dogs playing still.

So it's like, yeah, you were just. Going to get your swing. In order to get my swing in, we saw. When I was living in Long beach, when I first moved here, Canseco played for long beaches, like, minor league squad or something like that. They were in Long beach, and we went down there to see Jose Canseco play a couple.

Andrew Santino
That was like, the weirdest thing ever. Playing against little kids. Yeah, basically it was like Canseco playing against, like a. Like a local minor league team or something like that. It was so weird.

And I was like, what? Why is he doing. I don't know what he was doing, but we went down there and saw him when I was staying in Long beach, and I was like, this is kind of fun to see. And the difference is incredible. When you see it, you're like, oh, yeah, that's.

That's why he was a pro. Yeah. I mean, this. This. I think he pitched.

I'm almost crazy, but I think he. I think he pitched. Look up Jose Canseco pitching in Long beach. I'm almost positive there. Like, no, I'm telling you, it was nuts.

It was like a minor league. He did right. It's true. This is true. What?

Travis Kelce
Damn it. Jose. He was so. What was the name of the team he pitched with? Lance.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. Well, he threw underhand, Jay. He was. It was. It toss an underhand.

It was wild to watch him go do that. Yeah, it was nuts. Well, in stand up, constantly touring all over the country, man. Yes. You are the traveler.

Travis Kelce
Is there any city where you feel like you consistently just absolutely kill it? That's so tough. Like, my favorite cities to perform probably would be Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, La, San Diego, Phoenix, Nashville, Dallas, Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis, New York, New Jersey, Philly, Baltimore, Washington, DC. Ladies and gentlemen. There's never a bad show.

Andrew Santino
Nashville, just come on down. You know what? I don't. I really couldn't even, like. Truthfully, I couldn't even tell you.

I would say hometown, Chicago. I have the most fun going home. It means the most to me. It's like, just. I don't know.

Going home. You know what it's like to go home. You're like, it's just something else. But Chicago and Philly. I'm a hit in Philly.

In Boston, though, they always have treated me so well. KC does me real, real good. St. Louis does me a little dirty. I'm not gonna lie.

I know. Cause I'm a Chicago kid. I get it. But KC's always been good to me. St.

Louis has been all right. Dallas and the west coast has always been blessed me really well. The west coast always does me well. But nothing like going home, dude. Chicago, to me, it's more like probably just have more fun just seeing family.

Yeah. Just because, like, we have all of our family and friends come out and they bring their friends. And with this year, we had an after party at the Chicago theater and it was like, I don't know, 120 people or something. Yeah, it was great. It was like, that's more.

What it's about is like, getting the family and the friends to just go. Goof off, you know, I tell everybody, man, win, lose. Obviously love winning more, man. But I. I thoroughly enjoy going up to the suite after football games.

Yeah. And seeing all the friends and family, man. I. It immediately, like, obviously, if we win, the energy's up. It's.

Travis Kelce
Yeah, we get the party even more and have more fun. But being so grateful for getting to where you are in this world and being able to share that excitement and that success with the people. Yeah. That you grew up with, man. And the people that you're with now, man, it's just the absolute best.

Andrew Santino
That's the reason to do it. I mean, I said this in the car to my sister and her best friend are with me. And I said, I think the only thing that's cool about being an adult is that when you start to make money in your career, you get to enjoy it with your friends and your family, people that you love. The only reason for me to get more career success is I can have more fun with my parents and my family. My friends do more fun stuff.

That's like, to me, that's the only. I don't know. There is no other reason to do it other than using that to have more. Be able to have more fun and more access for fun. Yeah.

Yeah. And get a sports car. True. There you go. What is the better comedy town, Phil?

Jason Kelce
Your Casey. You got it. You gotta pick one. What's a better comedy town, Philly or KC? Yeah.

Travis Kelce
Don't look at me. Oh, bro, this is so mean. There's just more people. There's way more people in Philly. Yeah, that's a little unfair.

People more. More funny people. More. You have to go toe to toe. You'd have to go cities of similar size, like Indianapolis, Kansas City.

Andrew Santino
That would be similar in size, I bet. Right. Well, which one's better between Indianapolis and Kansas city? Yeah, Kansas City. There's no doubt about that.

Yeah, there's no doubt about that. Per capita Kansas. Crushing it. Can I. Let me ask you this.

Jason Kelce
I've always been interested in. I've loved stand up comedy my whole life. Travis and I used to watch, like, Comedy central presents, like we would. We've always been infatuated with stand up. What would be the way you would recommend to me or anybody else that's never done it to go try it, like an open mic.

Andrew Santino
Try a mic? Yeah. Is there, like, a strategy that you would recommend? I mean, try. If somebody's really wanting to do it.

I mean, I would highly suggest not doing it for everybody if that's. That's my first. That's my first piece of advice. Are you. Are you sick?

Travis Kelce
Go up there and have some fun and do it. Well, a lot of people are, like, the funniest guy in their group of friends or, like, the funniest dude at the office, but they don't understand, like, the thing to do the thing. It's like a. There's, like, another gear. Yeah.

Andrew Santino
And it's also. It becomes. If it's your career, it becomes a lifestyle. It embodies everything that you like. It's everything.

It's. You've dedicated so many years. You know, I started when I'm in 0607, and so it's like, you really have to. And I'm starting to get recognized now as a stand up. It's.

You know, I took. It takes a long time to really do it. I think a lot of people think they can, but I would say, if you want to just do it for the fun of it. Yeah. Go hit a local.

Yeah, hit. Yeah. Just. I'm not talking about making a career. I would say hit a local open mic and.

And try. And a lot of clubs will have open mics on, like, Sundays or Mondays in your city, depending, and I would say give it a. Give it a whirl and see if it does something for you. It could just be therapeutic. You know what I mean?

Where it's like, this is good to just get it out, and if you can't afford therapy, go to your local open mic. That's free. You can always yell about your dad at a local open mic in Poughkeepsie. Whatever makes you feel good in the end of the day. But, yeah, I would say go to a mic and try it.

Jason Kelce
God, that's good. I would love to see you two cats come and do it. I would love to set something up for you guys to go do it. Jay. Jay, would you be down?

Yeah, let's. So our next bit here is fans send us all sorts of crazy shit. What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried? The distance. Yeah.

Travis Kelce
The. He's on the tv and he's not. He's not. He's not. Jason would you want to open?

Maybe give it just a run? I purposely do. You're not here. You didn't hear it. If you do it with me, I.

Know this isn't a hand in hand thing. We'll see who can make more life fucking. Let's go make it a challenge. Challenge. Let's get it on.

Andrew Santino
What was the question? What did you say? What was that second question, though? Fans send us all sorts of crazy shit. What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give you at a show?

What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give me at a show? I mean, I've gotten. Look, I've gotten a lot of drugs. Drugs are definitely a gift that people give you. Nice.

Yeah, that's fun. But the wildest thing is, there's always a guy that comes. Well, a dude will come with, like, a pill jar, and he's like, hey, well, yeah. And. And I'm like, the gift?

Travis Kelce
I'm not taking jelly bean. It's probably. It's a good rule of thumb. Don't take random pills from people. They give you a p.

Andrew Santino
They'll be like, this is. This is DMT, or whatever. And I'm always like, I'm not taking this, but I will give it to a friend that I don't like that much. I will give them. Let them have it.

Travis Kelce
You give it to Bobby, and all of a sudden, he's naked on stage. Yeah, exactly. We've gotten to. But Bobby and I have gotten on tour. I will say the fans are incredible.

Andrew Santino
The art that they've given us is beautiful. Like, some of these artists make such incredible stuff, and that's why, on bad friends, like, our studio is built with tons of art. Yeah. Like, we do that. We put up all the art that people give us, and we cycle it out as often as we can.

But we've gotten some really heartfelt gifts. Bobby got a ring that somebody's father had during the Korean War, and I thought that was such an amazing. We get a lot of sober chips. Cause Bobby sober. We get a lot of those chips.

And I get a lot of golf stuff, which I think is really all the fans know. So they always get me golf hats or golf balls or, you know, cool little trinkets, but nothing ever like, oh, we did get. That's not true. We did get ashes of somebody's passed away. Mother or father, I don't quite remember.

Unfortunately, we got a little bit of ashes. Yeah, and we lost it. Our tour manager was like, I think we put the ashes on the thing and I was like, I don't know. So sorry to that person your dad is in. Doesn't sound like they really.

Somewhere else. They didn't really care that. Well, I have no idea. No, that wasn't. It was a nice thought.

They were like. But also want you to have a little bit. What do you do with. I was gonna put it on my eggs. I don't.

I mean, I have no idea. I don't know what you saw. Pepper. Little bit of Dad. A little daddy.

Little daddy eggs. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. We got some. We've gotten some weird, strange stuff, but nothing, nothing too dark.

Jason Kelce
Well, besides the ashes. Yeah, the ashes. But the ashes was kind of a nice. It was like a nice. I get it.

Andrew Santino
I get what they were trying to do. Yeah. Sentimental. All right, let's get the Chicago fandom. We got the NFL draft coming up and you guys are sitting in the pole position.

Jason Kelce
What are you hoping they do? I will say, do we. What do we believe in, my boys? We believe. And Caleb, do we believe?

Travis Kelce
Do you? I do. Yeah. I think he's the man. He's got some.

He's got some gamer in a man. But I'm also. I've always, I've said this pretty adamantly. I like Justin Fields. I've always.

Andrew Santino
I always supported the guy. I thought he was great. Yeah. I enjoyed them. You know, look, the system maybe wasn't working.

We have a lot of things going on in Chicago, as people know. Virginia McCaskey, I think is. I think she's 186 now. I think you guys can look that up. She's.

She's a little bit older. She's a little bit older. She sawed off pipes for the original. Yeah, sure. The original soldier stadium.

Yeah. She built soldier field. It's a little tough. I think the bears need some fix. And I believe in Caleb.

I think he's gonna. I think he's gonna do some great stuff. I really genuinely do. I hope. And you have to, unfortunately.

Cause we've had, you guys know, the bears just have been beaten up so much and even when we, you know, we start sniffing over 500, we bring ourselves back down to reality every season. I do think you guys got a good gm right now. I thought. Yeah, I thought Ryan was a great. I think he was head of.

Travis Kelce
I'm not sure what his position was in KC, but I scouted for you guys. Oh, yeah. He was big. He was. Yeah.

Yeah. He helped us build a lot of what we got. Yeah. And. Or at least he's been there the entire time I've been there.

And I've seen him in the building really working and. Yeah, you don't get those kind of jobs without getting, you know, a good resume build. No, there we look, we're. We're. I think we're really constructing what could be really great for the Bears.

Andrew Santino
I mean, we really, you know the problem with Chicago teams? We always say that we're like. We're rebuilding. It's like we've been rebuilding for a long time. We've been rebuilding since I was born on earth.

But it's. It is what it is. I mean, look, and I'll support them forever. I do get a lot of shit online for being. For supporting you.

I get a lot of shit for that. Whenever I wear a Casey, everyone's like, oh, really? You're a Chiefs fan now that they're winning? I was like, dust are my boys. I'm just supporting my friends.

But people really clap at me about that, so I can't stand that. Should get some guys who just love to rip it on the golf course with Cheeto, man. Yeah. That's what I'm fucking talking about. Yeah.

Come on. Come play golf with me. Then I'll support you. No, I'm a Chicago sports fan. Come on, Cole.

Yeah, Cole. Yeah. Cole's a local boy. He's a dog. We love him.

Travis Kelce
I love. I love watching. But I'm going to support the Bears again and again. It's hard. It's just really tough.

Andrew Santino
Particularly when you spoil me and I come see you, you guys. And that sucks. I was like, how come my team can't do that? I like that. That's what I like.

The trophy. I like, we want one of those. Well, out of all the Chicago teams, which one's top? Top dog. Bears.

Jason Kelce
Cubs. Bulls, blackhawks. For me, Cubs. I grew up like a. Like, you know, obviously, I grew up.

Andrew Santino
For me as a kid, it was basketball and baseball. The Bears were a little bit later in my life. Cause I played basketball and baseball. I never played football. I mean, I did play football, and then I got a concussion and my dad was like, no more.

I was like, no more. That's it. I'm tapping out. Yeah, namas. Well, this is funny.

I got a. In junior high, I was a safety, and I love playing. I love playing defense. And then our kicker got hurt, and the coach was like, santino is athletic and he can kick. Just all you gotta do is kick it away.

And the kid snapped the ball over my head like, 7ft. And I jumped as high as I could. And I used to be able to hop. We have pictures I could send you guys of me. Duncan in college, daddy used to be able to hop.

Now I have sciatica. He snapped the ball like 7ft over my head. And I remember looking up, being like. As I jumped, I remember going, shit. Like, I knew it was way slow motion.

So I ran back to grab the ball. And I'm looking over, kind of out of my peripheral. The coach is like, kick it, kick it. But I. But I knew I couldn't kick on the run.

You know what I mean? On that turn. No way. It wasn't talking. That's so hard.

And so then I just started sprinting up the line and I was making way and I see the first down and then. Yeah. And I woke up and my dad was over me. He's like, you got your bell rung. That's what he kept saying.

You got your bell rung. I was gone. I was. And after that, I was like, no more football. You remember Sean Taylor in the.

Travis Kelce
In the Pro bowl game? Oh, rocked that fucking kicker on the fake field goal. Dirty the other punter. Dude, that's what this is taking me back to right now. Oh, dude, the pain.

Andrew Santino
The pain was un. Cause it blindsided me too, because I'm running up the side. I don't see this dude coming out of this side. I got smoked. And it was helmet to helmet back then in junior high, helmet to helmet, they, like, cheered it on.

They were like, yeah, yeah. Spear them. Spear him in the head with your head. So I stopped playing. I stopped playing football and then, dude, produce.

Travis Kelce
O'Neal has a great bit about that. Who does produce? O'Neill. Yeah. Ip I thought.

I think he's passed. I'm not sure. Patrice Patrick O'Neal. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. He has a good bit about how it was just back in the day.

It was like, there wasn't. Get on the knee and pray for him. We were doing a tribal dance around this man.

Andrew Santino
I quit. I quit football and then. So Cubs and Jordan. I grew up in the Jordan era, so basketball was number one for me my whole life. And then now I've, I've, you know, I still go Cubs games.

Bulls, hawks, if I can, and bears. But yeah, cubs are number one for me. My dog's name is Cubs. Is Cubby. That's 15.

That's. I took my dad to the World Series. That was like the greatest moment of my life. I know, dude. I loved it so much.

I took my dad to the World Series, and I was shooting. I'm dying up here. And we were shooting. We were shooting. This is.

I'll tell it quickly, but we were shooting over Dodger Stadium. We were in Chavez Ravine, and there was, like, a kick out that's, like, above the stadium that looks down. And we're shooting this scene where, man, this is such a weird. I was on the show. I was mad at my father for not being a good dad, and he gifted me a car, and I.

And I wanted to bash the car to pieces because I hated him so much. And we were at night, we were shooting the scene where I was bashing this car over Dodger stadium about my dad that I hated, who did me wrong, but I was trying to shoot the scene as fast as I could because I had to leave that night to get to the airport for a four or 05:00 a.m. Flight to Chicago to make it to get to the World Series to take my dad. Yeah. And so fucking cool.

Got to the airport on time. I'm on the plane, and the flight is delayed, and I'm having, like, a panic attack. Like, oh, I'm gonna miss the World Series. And I remember I was in the galley way, and I called my dad, and I was like, I think I'm gonna miss the World Series. And I started just bawling.

I was bawling. And my old man was like, it's okay. It's okay. And I go, you can take someone. Just take someone to the game.

He's like, no, I'm not gonna go without you. Just sell the tickets. Just get on Stubhub or Ticketmaster and. Sell the tickets, dude, tell me you made it. And then, dude.

And then I hung up the phone, and the flight attendant was like, I think we're maybe gonna take off in the next half an hour. Praying to God we take off. And I am like, please, please, please make this please, please get an inning. This is my hand to God. I landed, and I jumped in a cab, and I threw the guy all the money I had in my pocket, and I said, please get me to Wrigley Field as illegally as you can.

And he was driving, dude, I'm not getting driving on the shoulder of the highway. Like, just on the shoulder. We're driving. And he was like, if I get a ticket, you're paying. I'm like, no, I don't care.

No doubt. And I get there, and I met my dad in front of Wrigley. We have a picture of it. As they were singing the national anthem, he was waiting outside.

It was the wildest moment. Remember that? Chicago. All that shit you fucking talk about. Not loving the city.

Travis Kelce
You fucking kidding me? It was amazing. So I got to go. And we still lost that game. But I had the blood.

Andrew Santino
I had such a good time. I got a similar. Not. Not as fucking cool as that. That is awesome.

It was wild. But I did take. I took to the World Series. Sat right behind home plate up there and progressive field, but as me and Jason know. Jacobs Field.

Jacobs Field, right. Yeah, you don't call it that, man. I'm telling you, those moments, they're the absolute best. I remember my dad throwing me on the rapid. The rapid.

Travis Kelce
And you get off right there at the gateway district, man, and you just. It's like the. The times have changed. Like, dad would just go up and get a fucking nosebleed seat, and we go and see the Indians. And then, of course, I'm taking them to the fucking World Series.

Andrew Santino
Coolest moment. It's a cool. It's such a. It's. It was such a big, special thing to do, and I'm stoked that I was able to do it.

It was just like. It was. It was incredible. I'll now never forget it. Your dad's a real ones.

Travis Kelce
I just sell the tickets. I don't even know if it's not you. I don't want to go. I loved him for that. I said, just take his buddy John.

Andrew Santino
I was like, just take John. Just take John to the game. He'll appreciate. Harvey will like the game. And he was like, no, I'm not going without you.

Just sell the tickets. And I literally was on one of the ticket apps, and I was contemplating hitting sell now. Like, I was, I held it open, and I was like, gosh, I just sell these tickets. I should just sell them. I'm never gonna make this.

And luckily, she was like, just sit down. I think we might be able to do it in 30 minutes. And I was like, please, God. And then, by the way, the whole flight, I was just, I was just chugging whiskey, double whiskeys. I was like, please make it.

Travis Kelce
Please make it. Gotta be prepped and ready to joy Wrigley. Oh, how has that been? Seeing that entire community outside of Wrigley? What the riggies did to that whole thing is bananas.

Andrew Santino
I mean, it's. It's like a commute. When I was a kid, it was. I mean, it was just like a, it was just a little scumbag central for, like, party animal now it's, like, high end. You can go get, like, a nice meal.

Before the game, it used to be just, like, a shitty McDonald's and a bunch of sports bars, and now it's, like, hotels and. And restaurants and. I mean, it's beautiful, though. I mean, they really did make it. Make it look like a.

An event. You know what I mean? Like, you can bring your full family there, and it's. It really is like a whole to do. You can spend a whole day down there having a good time, especially day games.

Day games are. Day games at Wrigley are. Well, they didn't start playing night games till fucking. Yeah. Like.

Like ten days ago. Yeah. Yeah, we're. We were too cheap for lights. Yeah, we were too broke to throw lights.

That's cool, though. You know? Fuck it. This is how we play baseball. Yeah.

In the sun, but cooking in the sun. And the. The bleacher bums with their shirts off just blacked out. Sunburnt. It is.

Like, that is Wrigley Persona. Beautiful, beautiful young women. Like, young blonde women, and just blacked out dudes. Shirts off, fatted out, and right next to them, that's a Wrigley iconic image. Now I'm sold.

Travis Kelce
I've always been. I've always been a die hard. Just want to go to every stadium there is, every. Every sporting event there is. Wrigley's been at the top of the list for you, so we got to do it.

Whenever you're not touring, we have to. At least go out to the bleachers. I know you don't want to sit like. I don't want to sit like Trav. But we gotta go when it comes to.

I want to be in the shit. We should go out there for a minute. You want to be in the. She won't last long, but we should go out. No, I promise you, I blend like the tree.

Andrew Santino
Okay? Yeah, I blend with the besties. What, just one? Is that Travis Cal? See, just one of those.

Travis Kelce
Jonas Valentinus.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. My doppelganger is. I keep getting tagged with Spencer Turnbull. That's. He's a Philly.

He's a Philly boy, right? Spencer Turnbull. Isn'T a picture for the Phillies, right? Spencer Turnbull. Yeah, the name does ring a bell.

Dude, you got to see this guy. It's like, people keep tagging me. They're like, you look exactly like this, dude. It's almost creepy. Dude, when Valentine's got drafted.

Jason Kelce
Yeah. I immediately definitely was just talking to this guy in the sky right before. You throw out the first pitch, full. On, 15 to 20 minutes conversation. I was like, I could have sworn I met this guy.

Travis Kelce
Oh, my gosh. People tagged me. People are like, this is you, bro. That's so good. Right away.

Andrew Santino
Ridiculous. He does. I mean, he is very handsome. I'll say that. So shout out to Spencer Turbo.

Yeah, he's a Philly now. He was in Detroit before, and now he's in Philly. Speaking of, like, sitting in the stands, I love sitting in the stands as well. My Kylie and I, one time. This is before Kylie got famous.

Jason Kelce
But in Philly, it's always hard to go to the sporting events. But I got a full on, like, disguise, though. Like, old, like mister potato head. Like the noses, which only makes you. Stand out more, like, for sure.

But people don't know. They're like, who the fuck? Who the hell is that guy? Just to sit in the outfield. And it lasted about four innings.

But, yeah, either way, it's so funny. We got to do it. Can I come with you guys? You are more than welcome. My legendary cub pitcher, Rick Sukliffe.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. Sukliffe baby. Suckliffe has been telling me to bring my ass out there for years. Let's go it to him. He's a Kansas City guy.

Travis Kelce
He grew up in KC. Big Chiefs fan. But he's been telling me I got to hit Wrigley with him. And what are we waiting for? My guy, dude, honestly, I don't at this point.

Andrew Santino
Let's go. It's. It's gonna happen now. We're going. We're doing it.

You'll see us, Wrigley. You'll see us. We'll be out there, baby. Let's get to a little. We gotta ask, but you don't have to answer.

Okay, great. That's always a fun game. Jason, you want to teed up? Love it. Sure.

Jason Kelce
Moving on to our last segment, we gotta ask. You don't have to answer. This segment is sponsored by La Z Boy. Join the movement. Take a moment on the most comfortable furniture out there.

Long live the. All right. You talked about the time Pat drank 23 Coors lights during the course of two of your stand up shows. He stayed for not one, but two. Oh, yeah.

Travis Kelce
Doubled down. Because that's how fucking funny. Cheetos. All right. Were you surprised he could drink like that?

Andrew Santino
Oh, my God. Well, first of all, people that know Pat know, like, he loves them Coors, baby. Look at them. Cool water. That mountain water blue.

I'm breaking. At the first show I had, the wild thing was we were. That was in Dallas at the Addison improv. And the wild thing was, during the first show, I just assumed they were gonna have a drink or two, watch the show and then leave. I was like, they got somewhere to be.

And when they told me he drank them out of Coors lights, I, for real thought they were joking. But the club was like, no, we actually have to go buy more. We just. We ran out of Coors lights, and it was like, you know, I was like, that's not even a real thing. And they were like, no, I mean, obviously people in the room were drinking them, but they were like, your party drank a fair amount of coarse lights.

And then when the second show came around, I thought, well, he's only. Probably only gonna have a few. We're not gonna. Like. You know what I mean?

Like, you're probably a few. Because then he'll want to go. But no, he smoked of whatever they gave him there. He just washed all of those. Easy.

Then we went out, and he was like, let's go to this. This mexican restaurant and get food and hang out. And we did. And then he smashed another probably dozen. And then he's like, who was at the club?

Maybe he wanted to go to the club to go see somebody. Maybe it was Des or something. I don't even remember who it was. And he was like, yeah, let's go meet them at the club. Then it was another, like, dozen Coors.

This dude, I was like, I see why. Your sponsor, dude. Surprisingly coherent. The entire. Oh, yeah, dude.

He's functional. He can. There's no, like, wobble. Like, Pat's gone. No, he was.

He was smashing through them cores. Do those. Those silver bullets were going down easy. Baby was a little surprised at first. Then I got used to it.

Jason Kelce
All right. When Rob McElhenny came on the show, we talked about the time the two of you made fun of Travis for wearing a Rolex on the golf course. Do you remember this? Oh, fuck, dude, on the. Remember when I brought all gold Rolex?

Andrew Santino
Yeah. An all gold Rolex to come play golf. I just got it. I didn't know where to put it. I don't want areas.

Travis Kelce
I was ripping it with it on. Did you get he just one of those out? One of those claw machines? I was like, where did you get that from, dude? Is that.

Andrew Santino
Why are you wearing that on the golf course? It was so shiny. I'll tell you a good embarrassing story about Rob McElhenney. He won't like this at all. We were playing on Trav had just, you just played with us, or we were just about to play with you.

And we were doing a round, and we were on a little par three. Mac put one, like, over the fence into the river, and he took his club. I want to say it's like a wedge and there's bushes, but there's also one of those cross linked fences behind the bush. Yeah. He threw it so hard, it went through that fence, through the bushes, and the La river sits below it.

And it's all concrete most of the time. It's not. No water in it. You could hear bing Ba bing. He heard his club bounce off of the concrete, and me and the two dudes were playing with silence.

I didn't say a word. I was like, oh, dude, I'm not going to talk to him for the rest of the day. And he goes, and now when I tell that story, I'm like, dude, you know, Mac threw a club one time through the fence, and he's like, I don't do that. I don't do that anymore. That's not something I do anymore.

I was like, okay, man, but you did. You did it once. Yeah. You did it once. It happened.

Yeah. He was. Send a ball into the. Until the river again. Yeah.

He sent the ball and the club into the river. Yeah. But Trav, when he came out wearing a big. A big, shiny Rolex, I was like, how are you going to swing with this thing on? And we kept making fun of him the whole time, but, you know, he stayed his course.

He was. Once it was on, and I. You got to eat it. Yeah. You have to.

Again, that's playground rules. No, you can't take it off. That's more embarrassing. Yeah, a dream foursome. Okay.

Golfers and non golfer. That's tough. Yes. Tiger, for sure. 100%.

Jordan. Jose. I know. He's a big golf dog. God, I'm trying to think of non golfers, too, because, like, my brain just goes automatically to golfers.

Tiger. Jordan. Kim Jong un.

Jason Kelce
Most. Most hole in one I've heard. He's so nasty. He's the best. How could I not?

Andrew Santino
Yeah. Holden, one again. Mister Oon is a par five. Yeah. And probably Larry.

Larry would be. Larry would definitely be up there. I would say, let's. Let's throw him in there. But there's so, like, that's what's tough, is there's so many dudes that I would kill to play with.

But Tiger, for sure, and MJ, I would love to play just those two cats alone. Cause, I mean, you get those two on the golf course that I would. Just want to see the competition. I know. That's all I want to say.

Travis Kelce
Has to be. They've had to have played together. Oh, yeah. It was just the most epic round of all time. Yeah, absolutely.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. Tiger. Tiger and MJ, whenever you guys want to play, give me a call. You've been on a ton of tv shows. What?

Travis Kelce
Which one, specifically do people most recognize you on? I mean, Dave is probably because it's the most recent Dave. People see me the most on, or, you know, when we were shooting the show. So I think that one a lot. I'll get, like.

Andrew Santino
I did my first sitcom that failed was called mixology. It's weird. Sometimes I'll get, like, an aunt. You know, like your aunt. Your Aunt Janine.

You know, when I'm out, it'll be like, were you on a show called McSalad? Yeah, I'll get that sometimes. Which is wild. Lasted one season on ABC and got crushed. But I did.

I've done so many, like, small, little bit rolls, too. Arrested development. No one really that snuck on that I did. Curb and I soaps. People will see me from that sometimes.

That was a couple years ago, which was, like, one of the best experiences of my entire life. It was wild. And mostly Dave. Like, almost always Dave now because it was such a big show on FX for a hot minute. And hopefully Ricky's to Nikki will be what?

More. More and more people see? Fuck. Yeah. And then who knows what's next?

I mean, I have a new show that we're working on now for me, so fingers crossed. All about whiskey, baby. All about whiskey, baby. And. And we need.

And we need a big bearded, big bearded guy in the barrel room. So, Jason, if you're available, I mean. Yeah, I'm free. Okay. Yeah.

You. Are you busy? Are you working? Actually, currently I officially don't have a job. Well, let's employ you, man.

Thank you. I would love to employ. Well, Wikipedia has. Has a list of a myriad of reasons. Myriad of things that they have on there.

Travis Kelce
As you're known as slugger, Santino, the red rocket. Yeah, that he is. Avoid. Timeout. I miss orange.

Jason Kelce
He's avoiding a word that's on this rundown because he does what is what? I used another good word. You did? You navigated it? Well, wait, what?

Andrew Santino
Can I see what the word is? Hold on. I think it's. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Where are we looking?

Wikipedia has an official list of your pseudonyms, right? Pseudonyms. Silent peas always get me the silent. P. If it's a P's, it's.

That's tough. Yeah. P's is. Are tough. But I think.

Jason Kelce
I don't blame. This is what. We don't blame Travis for. This. This is.

This is the. Whoever wrote that name, that word in there. How dare you? You can't say you're not proud of me. But he said myriad.

Andrew Santino
Myriad was good. That what? He was right. You have a litany. You could say litany.

Travis Kelce
Oh, a litany of another one. Litany. You did use some big words there. You nailed that. My pseudonyms on Wiki.

Andrew Santino
Yeah. The slugger Santino. That came from when I was a young lad in Chicago. We grew up in downtown Chicago, my mom and I, when she was still a single mother, and I would fight a lot. I like to fight often.

Yeah. Yeah. It was, like, one of my favorite things. Oh, hell, yeah. I was kicked out of a few different places for fighting.

I think I got kicked out of preschool for fighting, which is bananas. But they call me. Yeah. And then I went to moody Bible, which people know, and they asked me to leave politely. They asked because of my.

My mom was like, you kicking him out there. Like, we're asking him to no longer attend. Nobody wants. Very unreal guy. Very non catholic of him to punch everyone in the face that he doesn't like.

So they called. So my. They gave the slugger. Santino was born from that, and the red rocket was a natural. That was a great play on a dog's penis.

Nickname for me, because I'm the Red Rocket. Yeah, red Rocket. What's the other one? Agent. Agent Orange.

Agent Orange is not me. I'd never heard of that, but I like that. I'll take it. I'll take that. I like Agent Orange.

Travis Kelce
Cheeto dust cultivator. Yeah, I think that's just someone playing with Cheeto Santino. Yeah, I think that one. I think that was just a rendition of it. The last of the great Gingers.

Andrew Santino
Joe Rogan said that one time on his podcast, and that stuck. I think Joe introduced me on his podcast as the last of the great gingers, and. And that kind of made its way somehow onto wikipedia. It's so funny. It's like someone said something once, like seven years ago, and then it landed.

Travis Kelce
Out of those ones right there. We just listed. I think Agent Orange is. I should start going by that. I think that's amazing.

Andrew Santino
I mean, that's like, that's like my men in black code. And you know what, you know on men in black, they make you look into that pen. But they just have to look into my hair. I just stare down. Is like Medusa, man.

Especially me in the winter. Dude, this is. Look at this, dude. Ghostly. You know what I mean?

I can't wait for summertime to get burnt. Yeah, I just get a little. Just one more shade of orange. That's all I get. I get a little.

I turn into burnt orange. Sounds like a mountain dew. Like Agent Orange. Agent Orange. They did have code red.

Travis Kelce
Code red was. I mean, it still is a thing at Taco Bell. Code red could be me, but Agent Orange sounds really good. Yeah, I do like it. I mean, the history of it is not good, but I'll take the.

Andrew Santino
We'll take the current word play.

Travis Kelce
The history's not so good, but just a little different. Whatever, man. We still drink irish car bombs and that's not true. Cool. You know what I mean?

I still. That's not a cool. That's not like a happy piece of history. But we're fine with that. Alrighty.

Jason Kelce
I'm not sure you saw this, but I talked about losing my Super bowl ring last week in a pool of chili on our last episode. Yeah. Zero. Like he has. What is it?

Travis Kelce
Remorse? Like he doesn't give a fuck that he just lost the Super bowl ring. Yeah. Well, why? Because you.

Andrew Santino
They'll just get you another one. I care. It's not like I'm like happy I lost it, but I'm not like, how do you lose? I mean, that seems such a hard thing to learn. Well, you don't lose it.

Travis Kelce
Somebody steals. We have some video tape, we have some evidence. What's the most expensive thing that I've lost or sentimental thing that I've lost? Cuz that's. That.

Andrew Santino
That's. That thing's probably gotta be more sentimental of a loss for you, right? Than like pricey? Yeah, for sure. Yeah, the.

Jason Kelce
I mean it's expensive too, but it's definitely the sentimental mental nature of it, which sucks. What's the most. What's like the most expensive thing I've ever, like lost? I mean, you know what? This is not.

Andrew Santino
This has. This is not price, but it's funny you say that. That red rocket was a nickname I did for like a tour. And we had an artist draw this great piece of art and they made me like a custom red rocket hat. And I love that hat.

It had two r's on it. And I was racing out of my Uber to the airport and I left that in the Uber and as I closed the door. Oh, no, and I watched it drive away. I was gonna miss my flight. And I was like, should I call this dude to turn around?

And I, like, slowly was like, goodbye, sweetheart. It killed me because it was, like, one of one. It was the only one, and I was bummed. And that's. So whoever got in that Uber.

Yeah, it broke my heart. I was a bummer. Cause it was like, get it back to. I love that hat, man. It was a one of one, and it was a cool gift from my buddy.

So that. That sucked. And that was, like, only a couple months ago. But in the history of, like, losing stuff, I don't. There's nothing that I've, like, the amount of times I've left Airpods somewhere is comical.

Jason Kelce
Sure. I've gifted the world seven Airpods. Oh, my God, dude. I've left them so many places where they fall out of my pocket. My car key is down there.

Andrew Santino
It's not even in my pocket. Fell out of my pocket. Mine definitely did. Yeah, that's me. It happens all the time.

Jason Kelce
The company is genius. Yeah, dude, I have an extra pair of brand new Airpods at my house right now, just. Just in case. Just because I know I'm gonna lose it. Well, I learned this.

Andrew Santino
I lost my airpod in a seat of the airplane. And the guy was like, we can try to get it for you. I got up off of the plane. I waited. They're, like, picking apart the seat.

The technician was picking it apart, and then he goes, I see it right there. And I was like, oh, shit, awesome. And I go, can you get it? He goes, no, no chance. I was like, oh, okay.

Why did we wait? What was the point of waiting? But, you know, I don't know if you know this tip for everybody. If you lose one airpod, you can order a single airpod. You don't have to buy.

Yes, I swear. I went to the Apple store. I asked him. He's like, no, we can do a single order for one. Because this happened so much because I assumed I just needed to buy a new.

But he was like, no, no, you can get a singular airpod. So I went to the Apple store. So shout out to apple for that. That was huge. How much.

Travis Kelce
Would you remember how much the single one was? Don't shout out. Right? For anything. These never souls invented the most airport.

Andrew Santino
You're right, dude. Apple, you're the worst. You're the absolute worst. Unless, of course, you want to write me a check. They have phones.

Jason Kelce
They could have unbreakable phones. They could use glass. That doesn't break. But they purposely put it. But you know what?

Andrew Santino
I don't. I don't. Okay, I'll. I've never put a case on my phone. Jason does the same thing, and I've never broken.

Yeah. Case guy. I've broken it. I've broken it at least over 20. Well, this is come from the guy that lost his Super bowl ring, so this makes sense.

I think this makes. Yeah. I just want you to know you're plugging apple. Yeah. You're plugging them real hard.

Yeah, real hard. I might go to Apple and get a new phone. I won't leave it, though. I won't. I'm not gonna leave them.

Travis Kelce
All right, Tito, you're one of the most famous gingers out there. Can you do a Mount Rushmore of famous gingers for us? Oh, interesting. Very good yourself on there. Shout out to George Washington, the original ginger.

Andrew Santino
People don't know that. George Washington, he had what? My friend. My friend, my friend, you are remembering Mister Washington in a whig. Yes.

He was not his hair. That was a wig he was wearing. Oh, look, it's George. He was a redhead. You can look it up.

George Washington was actually a redhead. Is there photo evidence of this? I don't know how many photographs were being snapped of GW, but you can. Read up on it, I'm sure. Yeah, I think you can.

I think you read some literature about it, I would say. Who else makes the Mount Rushmore of Gingerly's? I mean, I probably put Ronnie Howard up there, Opie Taylor, because I got called that a lot when I was a kid. The first school I went to in Chicago, all of the black kids called me Opie. And I hated it because I didn't understand what it even meant.

But then I thought, oh, that kid was cute. From Andy Griffith show. That's nobody on this. And nobody's listening show knows what that. Is unless you watch Nick and night.

Yeah, that's right. It's just right, baby.

That's my dad's favorite show. My sister's over there. She can attest. My dad has watched more Andy Griffith episodes. Right.

Than anything on earth. It's disgusting. It's a good firm. Yeah. It's absurd.

So I would say, let's give Ronnie Howard a shout out. George Washington's on there. I don't know. Do you guys have any favorite gingers you like? It's pretty.

That's. I mean, we got a list of them. Oh, let me see. Does Canelo Alvarez count? Yeah, Canelo.

I get called. I'm the. Yeah. Canelo. I get called Canelo sometimes.

Prince Harry. He's in limbo with me right now. No, I'm kidding. Oh, yeah. Andy Dalton.

Shout out to Andy Dalton. Dude, he won me a free car, man. Did he really? Yeah. He threw the ball to me for a 15 yard touchdown.

Travis Kelce
And the game was so ass at the Pro bowl that year that it won me a free car. What kind of car was it? It was a genesis. And who has that? I still have it.

Andrew Santino
You do, dude. Yeah. Travis. Kumar. Kumar's out here sliding around.

Travis Kelce
It's a company car. Yeah. Bill Burr's got to be up there a hundred percent. And let's give the other one to, let's say. I'll say Lindsay Lohan for sure.

Jason Kelce
The Ogs. The LG lady. Gingers. Yeah. She's making her.

Andrew Santino
She's making her second round in the biz. She's coming back. Right? She's making, like, another pop in a big way. Yeah.

Travis Kelce
I think I saw. She did a. An irish movie, actually, not too long ago. I think my wife likes Hallmark movies. She did one of those and she liked it.

Andrew Santino
Loves hallmark movies, man. Loves that. Yeah. Are you a Hallmark guy, trap? I am.

Travis Kelce
You know, I dabble now. You do? I dabble now. Well, you like the cards, so you might as well like the movies. Big fan of the cards.

Huge fan of. Well, it's Kansas City based company, so. Is it really hallmark? Shout out. I don't.

I'm throwing that out there. I think it is, though. A piece of me thinks that's not true at all, is it? They are. Okay.

I mean, I've been there for fucking eleven years. I see it all the time. Maybe not. Basically, I know it's big. Love their cards.

Nice. We've mentioned on the show that conspiracy theories help bring NFL locker rooms together. Where you're. Where your conspiracy theories, you go for stand up. Yeah.

No, just period. You got these. Oh, my. Conspiracy theories? Yeah.

Andrew Santino
Oh, my God. They bring. They bring NFL locker rooms together like a flak. Like. Like Kyrese flat earth.

Travis Kelce
Yeah. Yeah. He's not the only one that thinks that. How many. What percentage of the NFL believes in flat earth do you think?

Dude, honestly, there's at least ten guys. Shocking locker room. I would imagine that are hardcore flat earth. I think if you took a truly anonymous poll, like, nobody had to disclose her name or anything like that, I think you're. You're over 15% of an NFL locker room.

It's crazy what I'm telling you. That's insane. Everyone gets hit in the head. It's. Yeah, that's true.

Andrew Santino
That's true. Cheetah. I was telling this to his position coach about, you know, what percentage of guys, and the position goes. There's nobody on the team that actually thinks that. Within earshot of this conversation, one of the guys said, I mean, how do you know it's not.

Yeah, man. Right on. And you gotta let him fly with that, you know? What are the other conspiracy theories I believe in? I mean, I could.

It's an endless list. I mean, which one? I mean, they're all real and true. The NFL is rigged. That one's really good.

That one I love. Yeah, that's a good one. I've seen the script. You've sent me one script. I got one script.

Yeah. Who's pretty good. I wanted to make sure you knew what, the script? Yeah. Because I was like, I'm gonna have to leave early.

And he. Travis printed out, like, it. Like old, like, old map quest directions. He printed out exactly what I needed to stay for. Well, it's because we had.

Travis Kelce
He came to the Broncos game last year. That's right. In Denver. In Denver. The game we lost.

And we had to lose a few more for it to really look unexpected that we were going to win this. I even said to him, I said, I'm bringing my wife's family to the Broncos game. Can you take an l? This is the first time my wife's parents have ever sat in a suite. Yeah, let me call.

Good luck. So he called everyone up and said if they would take an l. Everybody. If you lose to the Broncos, and. If you notice guys, if you rewind the footage, Travis, when the game is over, points up to my suite and just does a little wink and walks off the field.

Andrew Santino
That one was a bummer. I did not want to bother you. After the game was over, I was like, I will not be calling Travis. I will not get married. I didn't even want to call you.

Travis Kelce
I'm like, God damn it. I got him tickets to this fucking trash ass game. No, bro, it was such a good game. Well, my wife's parents had never. Or my wife's dad, too, was so, you know, like, he had never been in a suite at Mile High.

Andrew Santino
And he walked in the room and he was like, wow. And I go, isn't this awesome, dude? And he turns to his left, and he goes, so much food. I was like, whatever you want, man. You can have anything you want.

Travis Kelce
I think if you clean that out, they actually bring another. They'll bring more, bro. It was awesome. Yeah. We had a great time.

Fuck, yeah. Before we wrap up, Andrew, floor's yours. Is there anything you want to ask us or say before we. You know I love you both, and I appreciate you both. And I'm happy that new heights is new heights.

Andrew Santino
It's because we sat in my house and your penis fell out a couple years ago, and now you're in the podcast game. And I wish you were here, Jay. But next time, we'll do it again next time. But that's it. I got nothing else.

Come see me on the road. Go to andrewsantino.com for the tickets and watch bad friends and whiskey ginger, and I'll see you boys next time. You know it. The absolute best, ladies and gentlemen. Awesome.

Travis Kelce
Appreciate you coming on. Appreciate you, bro. Wrap this thing up, Jason. All right. Thank you to Andrew Santino for coming on the show.

Jason Kelce
This wraps up another episode of New Heights. Make sure you subscribe to the new Heights channel on YouTube so you know when all the new episodes are coming out. We'll be back next week to talk about the NFL draft and whatever else we feel like talking about. Listen, subscribe wherever we get your podcast. All right now.

Andrew Santino
All right, now. Once again, new heights presented by Wave Sports Entertainment and brought to you by Buffalo Wild Wings. Let's go, sports bar. Pros. Pro right here.

Travis Kelce
Jason's a little late. Delay. Damn it. Follow the show on all social media at new Heights. Fucking.

For fun clips throughout the week. Thank you to our production crew. Thank you to the 92 percenters. We love you guys. And thank you to Chito Santino for bringing the Jews.

Andrew Santino
Thank you. Thank you, boys. Peace.