Primary Topic
This episode narrates a disturbing encounter in which a woman confronts and apprehends a voyeur in a department store fitting room.
Episode Summary
Main Takeaways
- Vigilance in public spaces is crucial, especially in vulnerable areas like fitting rooms.
- Quick response and assertiveness can prevent perpetrators from escaping and may help in catching them red-handed.
- There are significant gaps in security protocols at many public venues, which can lead to safety risks.
- The episode emphasizes the importance of discussing and preparing for potential safety risks.
- Public support and awareness can drive change and improve safety standards in community spaces.
Episode Chapters
1: Encounter in the Fitting Room
Michelle Chandler describes noticing a phone on the floor of her fitting room, recording her as she changed. She confronts the situation with calm and alertness, preventing the man from escaping. Michelle Chandler: "I saw his phone...I immediately knew something was wrong."
2: The Confrontation
Michelle describes how she physically restrained the perpetrator, ensuring he could not leave the fitting room until security arrived. Michelle Chandler: "I grabbed the back of his sweatshirt and put him down on the ground."
3: Police Intervention
Discussion of the aftermath involving police and security, highlighting the response and actions taken once law enforcement arrived. Kim Komando: "What were the Nordstrom employees doing at this point? Because it seems like you just totally took over the entire situation."
Actionable Advice
- Always be aware of your surroundings especially in semi-private areas.
- React calmly and swiftly to ensure personal safety and gather evidence if safe to do so.
- Report suspicious activities immediately to authorities or security personnel.
- Support victims and share experiences to raise awareness about privacy violations and safety.
- Push for improved safety protocols in public spaces, advocating for more secure and monitored environments.
About This Episode
Michelle Chandler was trying on pants in a Nordstrom dressing room when she sensed something off. She looked down under her stall. What did Michelle find? A man recording her with his iPhone. He tried to run. That's when she took matters into her own hands, literally.
People
Michelle Chandler
Companies
Nordstrom
Content Warnings:
Discussions of voyeurism and a detailed recount of a peeping incident may be disturbing for some listeners.
Transcript
Linda Lorden
The mighty and resilient Merrimack river, carving through the communities of our great region. My name is Linda Lorden, proud president of Merrimack County Savings bank. And like the river that serves as our namesake, we're a constant yet ever changing presence. Because to us, it's bigger than banking. It's about powering communities and putting people first. It's about knowing where you came from and where you're going. That's Merrimack style. Visit us@themerrimac.com dot.
Kim Commando
Hey, it's Kim Commando today, your daily podcast to keep you up to date with all things digital and beyond. And I'd love to have you be a part of our podcast. You can make an appointment to speak with me. Just head over to commando.com. and on the top right there's a button that says, email, Kim. Fill that out, and that's it. Hey, it's Kim Commando. Today it's your fun podcast about all things digital. And during this podcast, every once in a while, we come across a story that's like, oh, my gosh, we have to get this person on the air with us. We do. Which, speaking of, by the way, Kim Commando today, you can get it as a podcast, of course, in the audio version. But for the true multimedia experience, you want to head over to YouTube.com kimcommando. YouTube.com kimcommando. That's where you can watch us do the show live on Monday, Wednesday, Fridays at 11:30 a.m. pacific time, 02:30 p.m. on the east coast. Or you can always catch it on demand if you don't want to just sit there and say, oh, stop what I'm doing right now because I have to go to YouTube.com kimkommando. Why are you laughing, Andrew?
Andrew
Most people do that. They say, oh, I'm sorry, I can't finish the dishes. I have to go to YouTube.com kimcommando. That's how most conversations happen. You're absolutely right.
Kim Commando
You know what? It has. People have asked me this so many times, how can I make sure that I never miss the live feed of Kim Commando today? And you know what I always tell them?
Andrew
What's that?
Kim Commando
Hi, Tom. Is that you just, you have to set a reminder on your phone.
Andrew
Oh, that's smart.
Kim Commando
Monday, Wednesday, Friday, just set a little reminder.
Andrew
Oh, my reminder's going off. I have to go to YouTube.com kimcommando.
Kim Commando
All right. Nobody's ever asked me that. No, nobody ever asked me that. Okay? But so many people have asked, you know, what is the. No, I'm kidding. What is the difference between the Kim commando? Well, the Kim commando show is full of, like, tech stuff that you don't get here, tech stuff you don't get in the newsletter. And also callers, the best callers in the universe. All right. Joining us is a woman by the name of Michelle Chandler. And I'm sure it has happened to you. It's happened to me. Is that you go to the store, right? Maybe you go to Nordstrom's, Macy's, wherever you want to go, and you pick a couple of sizes of jeans off the rack and you're like, I'm going to try these on and figure out a which one fits me the best so that I can purchase that pair of pants.
Michelle Chandler
Right.
Kim Commando
And so, you know, so you go into the dressing room and maybe you don't think about it, but, you know, you pretty much have to strip down, you know, to take the pants off, to try a shirt on, to try a bra on. How often does that happen to you?
Andrew
You guys try bras on before you buy them?
Kim Commando
Well, not me, but I know people who do because there's always the bra lady at the stores and she's always like this german woman. She comes in, she's like, no, that does not fit. She does. This happens to you.
Andrew
Germans are telling you your bras don't fit.
Kim Commando
It just seems to be that way. But I'm not. Okay. Well, you know, this is kind of a personal thing, but, you know, I'm not, you know, worried about a lot of that stuff because I am not, you know, finished sentence. I'm not. Well, not that endowed. Yeah.
Andrew
Okay. Gotcha.
Kim Commando
You know, when somebody said, you know, when somebody said, you know, boobs, I thought it was like something else, you know, I'm not really sure what happened. Okay. But anyway, are on a tangent, but let's get back. Okay. So Michelle was in a Nordstrom's in Colorado and she decided that she would try on a pair of pants and she looked down and she saw a phone that was recording her. Ew.
Narrator
Creepy.
Kim Commando
Awful. Michelle is joining us right now. Michelle, let's start. How'd you see the phone? You just looked down? It was there.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, I actually was alerted because I really smelled some pretty nasty feet. Oh, yeah. So I, you know, I was kind of alarmed at first because I shop Nordstrom's and Nordstrom rack pretty frequently. And when I walked up to this particular fitting room, it has one main entrance and you go left or right? I've always gone left. That's usually women's. And the fitting room attendant, I had several things to try on the fitting room attendant. She said, both sides are open. Pick any room with an open door. And I just kind of naturally went left and had a friend with me. And we went all the way to the end because there were two obvious rooms open. The only other people in there was a couple, and he was, the male was standing outside her fitting room and just trying, looking at her outfits that she was trying on. Yeah. So went into the fitting room. I had several different outfits, so I honestly cannot say how long I was being recorded. And like you said, when you're trying on undergarments, there were moments that I didn't have any on. I've only told the police that, so that's pretty uncomfortable. And, yeah, I just was trying on outfits. I had a particular pair of jeans on. And I went to bend down and I looked over to my left because I thought, someone. There's someone in here. I almost wanted to say to the girl that was with me, Asia, is that you? And then I thought, there's someone else in here. That'll be rude, you know? And I looked over and saw his shoes. They were men's shoes and filthy socks. And then his iPhone camera was pointed directly at me.
Kim Commando
Gross.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, yeah. So in that moment, I slowly got up and just remained calm. And I thought, is this really happening? I cannot believe this. I just pulled up my pants and didn't zip them, didn't button them, quietly walked out the fitting room, went back to the entrance, and I told the fitting room attendant, there is a man filming me in the room next to me. And she almost didn't know how to respond. She was, like, in shock, maybe. And I repeated myself. I said, there is a man next to me filming me. I saw his phone go call security. Go call police. And I walked away, and I slowly went back to the fitting room, and I squatted down to make sure that what I was seeing was correct. And he was still squatting down.
Kim Commando
He's still there.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, he was still squatting down. I know he didn't see me. That's one thing that I, you know, the way he was holding the phone, his camera lenses were pointing at me. He would have had to be laying on the floor looking up at his screen. So that's why I just thought, I'll be quiet. I'm going to go call for help. And, yeah, I walked back. He was still squatted down in the fitting room. And I, his pants were at his thighs. I can't say what he was doing. But, yeah, I confronted him immediately. I grabbed the fitting room door and I shook the handle, and I said, what are you doing? And it was silent. And I said, you're filming me, you sick expletive. And he stood up, and he was like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, ma'am. I go, you're not going anywhere. And I held the door pulled towards me so that he wouldn't be able to open it and get out. At that point, the gal that I was with, she walked out and she's like, what's going on? Because she thought I was talking to her at first because, you know, I said, what are you doing? She's like, I'm trying on clothes, and.
Kim Commando
Where are you yelling at me?
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, yeah. At this point, it was just the three of us on this end of the fitting room. And she said, what's going on? And I said, this man, this guy is filming me. I saw his phone, and she's like, oh, my gosh. And so I'm holding the phone. I'm like, you're not getting away with this. You're not going anywhere. And Asia goes, he's crawling. He's down. He's trying to crawl out to the next fitting room. So I just slowly stepped over to my left, and as he started to get up, that fitting room door was open, and he started to get up. I grabbed the back of his sweatshirt and I put him down on the ground, put my knee in his back, put my hand down. And this is not the picture that's being circulated around the Internet right now. That is at the very end. So this all happened. And there's kind of no footage at this point, but I held him down, and I looked up down the hallway towards the entrance of the fitting room. The attendant was standing there, and I said, go call the police. And she said, we did. I did. I did. She stayed down there. And two male employees came in. They came over to me and said, what's going on? And I said, this guy was filming me while I was, you know, undressing in the fitting room. And they said, how do you know this? And I said, because he had his. I saw his camera pointed right at me. And then he admitted he apologized over and over. And, yeah. And they said, okay, well, we got it. And I said, he's going to run. And I'm still with my knee in his back. He's on his stomach. And they said, no, we got it. And so I slowly got up, and as soon as the perpetrator could get to his knees and his feet, he tried to bolt, he tried to take off, and the two male employees grabbed him, were trying to contain him. They were just kind of like in this scuffle, kind of bouncing off fitting rooms and the guys trying to get away and his sweatshirts kind of pulling off. They're almost to the entrance of the fitting room. And an employee says, there's nothing you guys can do. You can't do anything. And so I squeezed around them, and I said, oh, hell, no. And he would have gotten away. And that's when I just went for the head, put him in a headlock and held on and leaned my back, my body weight, against the wall. And so that's the video footage that's circulating around the Internet right now.
Kim Commando
I also saw that you had taken a belt and wrapped it around his ankles.
Michelle Chandler
That was the very end because so during this video that's out there, I had him in a headlock, and he was, he was fighting because he wanted to get away. And so the two male, one has his sweatshirt hanging on around the corner of the fitting room, and the other male is holding his legs and saying, just relax, man. You're not going anywhere. There's a lot of people that are going to stop you. And I'm like, where's his phone? And Asia went to grab his phone. Well, he had one free arm. And so he went for his pocket, grabbed his phone and just hung onto it for dear life. And, you know, I'm leaning against him and his arm is like, up here, and I'm like, where do you think you're not getting away with this? And I literally just yanked his phone out of his hand. I think it was at that point he kind of gave up. I handed the phone to Asia. She grabbed his wallet out of his pocket. The two male employees were still holding on, but I think he, he kind of, you know, knew he was, he was caught. And so he kept saying, can I just sit down? Can I sit down? I'm not going to go anywhere. And the two, one of the male employees was like, can we just let him sit down? And I said, well, you guys better not let him go. And at that point, that's kind of when I looked up and I saw male customers, female customers, people walking by into the other side of the fitting room, just kind of looking on, but then minding their own business. I looked up and this male customer was looking at me, and he went and pulled out his phone and I looked right at him and I'm like, this is what's wrong with this world, and this is why men don't belong in women's fitting rooms. And so then I said, okay, we can let him sit down, but you guys better not let him go. And I still have these Nordstrom jeans on that while I'm holding this guy. I'm trying to keep, keep them from falling off because they're unzipped, unbuttoned. I didn't have shoes on, and.
Kim Commando
I.
Michelle Chandler
Thought, okay, I'll let him sit down. Because everything was just going through my mind, like, be calm.
Narrator
Big tech is taking over everything, and that includes your email, too. They are constantly trying to track us and what we see in our inboxes. The good news is that you can take back control if you know about the right tools. Start mail is the easy to use alternative to big text email. It was built entirely with your privacy in mind, and it includes features like unlimited disposable email aliases. You can use them for anything from selling stuff online to accessing coupon codes. Worried about moving from the account you've had forever? Don't be star. Mail's email and contact migration tool makes switching email providers really simple. With just a few clicks, you can transfer all of your important info to your new Start mail account. Protect your email from advertisers, government surveillance, and spam. Right now, take back control of your data with start mail. Just go to startmail.com Kim for a seven day free trial and 50% off your first year. Start mail with a t. That's startmail.com Kim.
Kim Commando
You know, let me just, let me stop you for just saying you're doing an amazing job. I mean, seriously, I mean, everything that has just happened, everything that you've just gone through, and you have the common sense to say, you know what, I'm gonna, I gotta get this guy's phone. I gotta hold onto him. Not gonna let him go. And then you've got the Nordstrom employees, but you have the wits about you to say, you know what? I'm, I'm going to get this sob so he doesn't do it to somebody else.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah. Yeah, you know, I just, I don't know. By the grace of God, I just was calm. I kind of thought about situations like this in the past. Like, what would I do? And I think that's really what we need to bring awareness to for, especially women. Kind of go through scenarios, you know, and always be prepared. Be aware of your surroundings.
Kim Commando
What were the Nordstrom employees doing at this point? Because it seems like you just totally took over the entire situation.
Michelle Chandler
I was, I was grateful that they were there and trying to help, but he would have gotten away, especially when, you know, he's fighting all the way down the hallway to get away from them and then being told at the entrance by an employee, there's nothing you guys can do. You can't do anything. When I did squeeze around to before I got him in the headlock, I'm like, oh, hell no. You people let people get away with shoplifting. What's next? This? And that's when I put him in the headlock. After we did have his phone and his wallet, and I agreed to let him sit down if they would not let him go. I turned, I did a 180 with him still in a headlock so that his back would be against another wall. And he sat down. One of the male employees did hold his arm behind his back, and another employee sat on his feet. At that point is when. So there's a lot of questions on, you know, because of the little bit of footage that is out there, a lot of men are saying, this is fake. This is staged. Look, she changed clothes. She has on a different shirt. There's no way she could have held him. And so it was at that point when he sat down, I thought, I'm going to go, like, compose myself and put my pants on and zip them up and get my shirt on. And so I ran into the fitting room, changed real quick. Asia was recording a lot of this. And I walked back out and Nordstrom management, maybe a couple of people that I didn't see back there previously, but they walked back. They had phones or radios, and they said, you employees need to remove yourself from the situation immediately. And we all kind of looked at each other like, you're kidding me. And she said, if the two of you, referring to myself in Asia, if the two of you want to hold him until the police get here, that's up to you, but our employees need to remove themselves from the situation immediately. And I said, get him on his stomach. And so they got up, walked out. I had the perpetrator on his stomach, held both of his hands behind his back, and I sat on him. And female, other female. The attendants were saying, you're so calm. You're so calm. I just can't believe how you're handling this. You have so much of my respect. And that's when I told Asia, I looked around, I saw a new belt hanging somewhere I said, go grab that belt, put it around his ankles and pull it tight. So that's when we sat there, and security finally showed up. And I would say, it's been 25 minutes at least.
Kim Commando
Whoa.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah. So the head of Belmar security showed up, and he walked back, and he said, I'm going to have her release you, and you're going to sit down, and you're not going anywhere. The police are on their way. If you try and run, I will drop you. Do you understand? And he said, yes. So I let him go, and he sat on the floor against the wall. And the security head of security said, do you know why you're here? And he said, yes, for filming females in the fitting room. And we have all this on video, too. And so I stood up, and minutes later, the police showed up. And, yeah, I handed them his phone, I handed them his wallet, and there was talk of a knife. He had a pocket knife and was asking for it, which I thought was kind of bizarre, but. So it was kind of funny because the police were there. I gave them, you know, his two items, and Asia went out to the male employee in the video with a red plaid shirt and said, hey, police, they're asking for the knife. Did you guys find his knife? And the male employee threw his hands up and said, I don't know. I have nothing to do with this situation, and walked away. And then just. We never saw.
Andrew
So I have a question about the beginning of the incident before we get to the conclusion with the police. You said when you. When you walked in that you had seen a man standing against the wall. Were you assuming that he was there to watch someone try on outfits, or was that the guy who then moved in to film you?
Michelle Chandler
No, that was not the guy, because when I was walking down, he, his wife or girlfriend had the door open, and he was looking at the outfits that she was trying on.
Andrew
So this guy was hiding in the dressing room, waiting for somebody to come into the room next so he could start filming.
Michelle Chandler
I I don't. I don't know if he was in there, if he was in another fitting room, but he did come down, and it seemed. I mean, we were the only three left in there.
Andrew
Okay.
Michelle Chandler
So.
Andrew
So, yeah, I was just curious if he was just waiting for someone or did he follow you in there?
Michelle Chandler
I don't know. I. I don't know. I just know when I walked in there, I didn't notice anyone else in there. And he must have followed you anyway, but they were gone. Like, I mean, they weren't in when they weren't there when I walked out and confronted the guy.
Andrew
Okay.
Michelle Chandler
So, yeah.
Andrew
Now, have you seen a copy of what he filmed?
Michelle Chandler
I haven't. I tried to get a copy of the police report, like, several days later, and I got an email back saying that it wasn't complete. And I called the victim advocate with the Lakewood police department. And then she informed me that a search warrant was issued for his phone and it was at the crime lab. And, yeah, I don't know what all is on there. I told her I was really uneasy not only just having footage on there of me and knowing detectives and other people are going to see that, that I wanted to know if he was, like, on a live platform filming. I guess people can do that these days and get paid. So I have no idea yet. All I do know is I pressed charges when the police came. I did press charges. I've spoken to the DA's office. He will be appearing in court next month. And I do know he was charged with criminal. Criminal invasion of privacy. With sexual gratification or for sexual gratification. And another charge of adult invasion of privacy, I believe.
Andrew
Okay. Did they arrest him at the scene? Like, he's. He taken away in a cop car or did.
Michelle Chandler
I left. I left because they had him still sitting on the floor. We gave them the video footage we had on our phone and I left. So I don't know. I just didn't know what. I know from the DA's office and LAPD that he was charged and has a court date and they told me what he was charged with. So.
Kim Commando
Do you know anything about the guy? How old he looks like he's, what, in his early twenties? Is that. Is that about Ron?
Michelle Chandler
You know, when I took his wallet, I did take a picture of his id. So, yeah, he's 19.
Andrew
Okay.
Michelle Chandler
About five eight. I'm five'five.
Andrew
Well, I mean, he sounds like he's a small guy. You're holding the door and he can't even get out of the room. What I'm picturing and seeing from the video is that he didn't seem like a big dude.
Michelle Chandler
No, he wasn't a big dude, but he was getting away from the two male employees that were pretty solid guys. So. Yeah.
Kim Commando
So has anybody from Nordstrom reached out to you?
Michelle Chandler
No. No, they haven't. I've gotten a couple emails talking about minority bucks and sales going on, but.
Kim Commando
Great.
Michelle Chandler
No, you're normal reached out to me and. Yeah, I don't.
Andrew
Are you planning on reaching out to them. Are you planning on maybe a lawsuit, legal action for the way they handled the entire situation?
Michelle Chandler
I feel they do need to be held accountable.
Kim Commando
I agree.
Michelle Chandler
I am waiting on a complete copy of the police report right now. So.
Narrator
Big tech is taking over everything and that includes your email too. They are constantly trying to track us and what we see in our inboxes. The good news is that you can take back control if you know about the right tools. Start mail is the easy to use alternative to big text email. It was built entirely with your privacy in mind and it includes features like unlimited disposable email aliases. You can use them for anything from selling stuff online to accessing coupon codes. Worried about moving from the account you've had forever? Don't be star. Mail's email and contact migration tool makes switching email providers really simple. With just a few clicks, you can transfer all of your important info to your new Start mail account. Protect your email from advertisers, government surveillance, and spam. Right now. Take back control of your data with Startmail. Just go to startmail.com Kim for a seven day free trial and 50% off your first year. Start mail with a t. That's startmail.com kim.
Andrew
You're absolutely right. These stores, they just let shoplifters walk out the door. They're just so worried about being sued and their liability. And for them to say, we have a victim here and we have the perpetrator of the victim, we are not going to be involved, even though it's happening because of our dressing room, is ridiculous.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, and there's more that have, has come up that I can't speak on. But yeah, they need to be, they need to be held accountable in some way. You know, on one end they have the ability to have all their fitting rooms match some of their other stores and go all the way to the floor.
Andrew
Yeah.
Michelle Chandler
They have stores where fitting rooms, Nordstrom racks where fitting rooms are near the men's suit and near the women's lingerie. So it's kind of implied this is men and women because they're, they're signs. There's no longer women's and men's on their fitting rooms in the stores that I've been in. And, you know, this was not just shoplifting or two customers squabbling over a last pair of, you know, some last edition of Nikes or something. You know, this was a violation. And for them to call off men that are willing to help and in a sense, leave me with the perpetrator, like you're on your own until the police get here, if you want to hold him. And, you know, I was just like, you know, you let people get away with theft and don't want to do anything. Where does this stop? He's not going to get away if I have anything to do with it. But, like, where does this stop? This could have been a lot worse if he. If this were. If I were 14 with my.
Kim Commando
I was, you know, I was just going to say that. I was just going to say that.
Michelle Chandler
It could have been worse. It could have been worse if it was just water in there and changing clothes and he decides to walk in her room or crawl under the door and have his knife. What could have been done in just a few minutes? So, yeah, you know, there needs to be. I think we need to create a safe place for women, for everybody, really. I mean, half men's have women's and create a third safe place for whoever. Yeah. So we'll see what happens. I'm just in the beginning of speaking out. I've found my voice. This really hits home for me. I've had a couple of rough years of life. I'm 53. I've raised five amazing kids. They're all adults. I'm in Spokane right now because my son is graduating as a pilot and aircraft mechanic this weekend. And, yeah, I have been through a lot. And it wasn't until this past year that I've had to dig deep and do some very difficult internal work and healing. And part of that has come from a lot of childhood traumas and a lot of stuff that I've been through that, you know, I just had to dig deep and let God heal some of those wounds and, you know, change my thinking. And I think that had a lot to do with this situation, which in the end, when I was holding him down before the security guard asked me to release him, I'm sitting there alone. I'm thinking, no one's coming. All of my dysfunctional belief systems growing up, even into adulthood and my marriage, I'm sitting on this guy, my friend is holding his ankles with a belt, and I'm just like, no one's coming. Men are doing nothing. I'm fighting a battle alone. I'm struggling. And then a lot of anger and rage came up, and I was like, you are not going to get away with. I told him, I said, I could beat the crap out of you right now. I said something else, and he didn't say anything. And that's when all this rage of you can't get away with this. You can't do this to me. You're not going to get away with this. I'm in control now. But then in that moment, because of a lot of the work that I've done recently, and I'm in recovery right now, working my program, I took a breath and I just said, this is a sick man. God, keep me from being angry. Thy will be done. And it was just like a moment of healing and release. Like, I'm in control now. But this does not have to define me. This does not have to break me, and I'm stronger for it. And so, yeah, it's been a lot.
Kim Commando
Well, you know what? I'm proud of you. I am. Because by you speaking out, you don't know how many. You really have no idea how many people that you're helping right now. You don't have any idea. I mean, somebody who is going to think twice the next time they go inside of a dressing room, a mom who's going to say something to her son or daughter, a grandmother, grandfather, dad, you know, whoever it may be, is that. That they're gonna say. They're gonna have. They're gonna have the talk because, you know, we talk about stranger danger, but because of technology, stranger danger is different now. And especially, like you said, you know, you've been violated, okay? You just don't know how much quite yet. And that's gotta be that nagging thing that's sitting in the back of your head right now as well, and having the power to take control of this and using the words that it's not going to define you. But I bet you, Michelle, you know what? I'm looking at you, and you are beautiful. You are smart beyond belief. I could tell. You are a tiger.
Narrator
Mom.
Kim Commando
These are my kids. Don't even come near them. Don't even think about hurting them. Okay? Maybe this is your calling, that you look at these, that there's some type of standard that's put forth, that these rooms are locked. We're not having an 18 year old room attendant that's standing there saying, I gotta put the blouses over here and I gotta put the pants over here, that people don't want, that it's actually somebody who's there to help. And obviously, training. There's no training going on when there needs to be training because we have a lot of sickos in the world with the tech in their hand to do a lot of damage.
Michelle Chandler
Right? And the training, you know, lack of training is what it is, is don't do anything. You know, we've let a lot of these guards down that have been protective measures and to appease things going on in society, and it's hurting us and, yeah, we need to do something. You said something earlier about helping other, you know, women. I am committed to pouring my life before this happened. I've been working on writing a book just because I've had a story to tell before. This. This kind of is just another big chapter I can add to it. Yeah. But I'm here to just make a difference, pour my life into women who have been through whatever kind of traumas, addictions, mental health, you name it. I just think, you know, everyone's broken in some way, and, you know, there needs to be mental health awareness. There needs to be healing at an inner level. And, yeah, I just think, you know, we, we grew up in a world, or I did, anyway. I don't know how old you all are, but I grew up in a world where I could play outside until the sun went down.
Kim Commando
And, of course, I remember those days.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah, we didn't lock our doors and, you know, people came and went, and if the kid was acting up, my mom wasn't afraid to bring them in the house, call their parents, and take care of business. And, you know, now it's just, it's sad that we, you know, stranger danger isn't enough. You have to, I think, really go through scenarios of what could happen. One of my daughters was in the Aurora theater shooting years ago in theater nine with a gunman. And I think it was that point that we as a family thought we need to be prepared. We need to do some things. We need to teach our kids about gun safety. And at that point, it was like a mental shift, in a sense, not sitting with our back to the door in restaurants looking when I'm walking out by myself into a parking lot, just being aware of your surroundings, and I think the stranger danger, it needs to be like reality. You know, it's sad that we have to assume the worst when we're out in public spaces and be on guard the way we have to and really think through, what would I do if I saw a camera under, you know, a fitting room? Or what would I do if, you know, I'm in the parking lot alone? Or our kids, you know, if a stranger does come, it happens every day. And, you know, you really need to walk through scenarios and really be mentally equipped and prepared for something like this.
Andrew
Good advice.
Kim Commando
It's great advice. There's just so many, so many different scenarios that we as parents are dealing with and the kids are dealing with. And it's, and so many of it is. So much of it is because of technology. It's because of social media trying to get that Internet clout, whatever it may. And in some way, and I know this is going to sound kind of strange, but some way, the Internet almost makes the sickos think that it's okay, whatever they may be doing, because they find an outlet for what that is, and then they find other people that give them that way to go, good job. And it just kind of fosters that, you know, it's not to say that we didn't have weirdos, you know, we were growing up. They were. But it just seems that we have seemed to gotten to a place in society where it's almost the weirdos is normalized, not the exception.
Michelle Chandler
Yeah. And I know, you know, it comes with, you know, on that level, even just with, you know, posting the, just a snippet of the initial video. And I didn't know it would go this viral. I'm not on TikTok or Twitter or, you know, I don't know. And people were like, you're going viral. Like, this is crazy. And, yeah, I think technology just, you know, it does give kids, young adults just, it can be an unhealthy outlet. And then, you know, I'm a big per, you know, I say, you are what you think. And our minds are a powerful weapon. Keep them loaded, and it's what you keep them loaded with. And if we're bombarding our kids and young men with pornography and violence and, you know, it's just such easy access these days that parents really don't have an influence on the type of kids they're raising. And so I think that's been a big downfall to where we're at. And at the same time, as viral as this has gone, you know, I'm getting people that are like, oh, I would have, there's no way you would hold down a, you know, average sized man, and I would have just snapped you in the, you know, I don't know, just all these crazy comments. And this is dumb.
Kim Commando
It's dumb.
Michelle Chandler
But I'm gonna, you know what? I'll use technology to my advantage, and I'm not afraid of, I'm not afraid of anything that anybody can say about me or bring up. I've found my voice, and I am here to be wise about this platform that I've been blessed with and just try and make a difference and help.
Kim Commando
People you know what you are? You are, Michelle, you are making a difference right now. And I want to hear from you in three months because I guarantee you that you're going to come up with some type of slogan, some type of website, get legislation, you know, the Congress, whoever it may be, who you may or may not know. And if you need help, I'm here to help you.
Michelle Chandler
Thank you.
Kim Commando
Because we do need to put a stop to it and, you know, and if I can lend a hand anyway, just know that I'm here for you. Thanks. Thanks for spending the time with us and telling us everything that we're went down.
Michelle Chandler
Thank you so much. We'll be in touch.
Kim Commando
Thank you. Michelle.
Narrator
Big tech is taking over everything and that includes your email too. They are constantly trying to track us and what we see in our inboxes. The good news is that you can take back control if you know about the right tools. Start mail is the easy to use alternative to big text email. It was built entirely with your privacy in mind and it includes features like unlimited disposable email aliases. You can use them for anything from selling stuff online to accessing coupon codes. Worried about moving from the account you've had forever? Don't be Star Mail's email and contact migration tool makes switching email providers really simple. With just a few clicks, you can transfer all of your important info to your new Start mail account. Protect your email from advertisers, government surveillance and spam. Right now, take back control of your data with start mail. Just go to startmail.com Kim for a seven day free trial and 50% off your first year. Start mail with a t. That's startmail.com kim.
Andrew
You know what was crazy about that interview is that while she was telling her story, one of the thoughts that came to my mind was we see videos on the Internet like hers that goes viral and we just scroll by it, not knowing that there's a person and there's emotions and feelings and a victim and a reaction. All that came after that video because I'm sure thousands of people went, oh, my gosh. Or, you know, a smiley face comment or whatever and scroll past. But there were, there's a person who is really affected by that, in that video.
Kim Commando
Of course. I mean, that she's a, she's a mother of five, okay? I mean, and now all of a sudden there's some weird video of her. I mean, she essentially said she was naked, right? Okay. In that dressing room and you've got some 19 year old whack. Job bending over, taking a video. She said to put it live on some website.
Andrew
That's why I asked. I asked if she had seen it because I suspected that he probably was live feeding it, which means there's no video that's sitting on his phone. Obviously they can find out with, you know, looking into the phone, but yeah, I feared the same thing, that now it's everywhere. It's not just sitting on his phone or sitting at a police station in an evidence box. It's everywhere forever. And that's awful. That's so awful.
Kim Commando
It is. I mean, she's obviously very upset, feels violated. She's been victimized. She really has. She went in there to try on a pair of jeans at Nordstrom's and she came out a victim. And on multiple levels. Yes. The store didn't. The store didn't help her at all. The store didn't do anything.
Andrew
They did the word opposite of helping her. They told people trying to help her go away. She's on her own. That's embarrassing.
Kim Commando
Yeah. You know what? Nordstrom is not contacting her for a reason.
Andrew
Yeah, they know they did wrong.
Kim Commando
Yeah, they know. Well, you know what? She's going to find her voice. If she said, I like that. She said a prayer when she was holding this guy down saying, God, help me, not kill him, help me. Just, you know, this 19 year old.
Andrew
Picked the wrong person to film in a fitting room because she's. She's not done.
Kim Commando
You know, I was thinking about this. I take Barry's granddaughters for their birthdays. I take them to Nordstrom and I let them buy like three outfits.
Andrew
Okay.
Kim Commando
Okay. And so it's kind of a big deal. And I was thinking about the last time there was not a room attendant in the dressing room. The boys and girls were in one. I went in with the. I was standing right outside the door with the 13 year old, with the eleven year old. I actually went into the dressing room with the little girl just to make sure she was safe. I mean, that's what you gotta do, right? What you gotta do. All right, I'm sure we're gonna keep in touch with Michelle. We'll keep everybody updated on what goes on with her case. Hey, if you learned one thing from this podcast, I want you to share it. And if you have any family members who you think needs to hear this message, very powerful, important message is just go ahead and, you know, copy the link, hit the share button, whatever it may do, drop a few comments, because that'll help the algorithms, maybe push this to the top because this is a really, really important story, and thanks for being here to hear with us. This program is a copyrighted production of Westar multimedia entertainment and protected by the copyright laws. Any rebroadcast or use of this program for commercial, business, economic or financial purposes without the written permission of Westar multimedia entertainment is strictly prohibited.