Mr. Charlie's Told Me So with Jackie Johnson

Jackie Johnson

This is a headgum podcast.

Nick Weiger

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Mike Mitchell

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Emma

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Nick Weiger

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One of the brothers knew more about potatoes than anyone in the world. I don't think french fries will ever be that good again. This was architect Stanley Clark Mestin describing one of the eponymous MacDonald brothers, as quoted in a 1989 LA Times profile by Dirk Sutro. Meston had a lengthy, esteemed career in his field, but is remembered for creating the architectural feature that evolved into the most famous logo in fast food, the golden arches. Opting to take a flat fee as payment as opposed to a revenue share, Messen's stroke of branding genius ultimately only netted him fractions of a penny on the dollar, a financial fate paralleled by the McDonnell brothers themselves, who were purged from their own company by craven philanderer Ray Kroc, much like how Eduardo Savarin got blocked from Facebook by Mark Zuckerberg.

As important as the arches logo itself is the company's colorway red and yellow, a stop slow combo that, ironically, according to one psychologist, evokes speed and quickness. By 1968, the arch's design and its red yellow palette were effectively set in stone. And so over the subsequent decades, the logo embedded its way into children's brains like a mind flayer parasite, creating lifelong associations with the brand as a kind of nourishment absolute. So naturally, when a plant based McDonald's simulacrum opened in Los Angeles on Valentine's Day 2022, it chose the red and yellow colors as shorthand, along with a Helvetica adjacent font similar to Mickey D's own. Named for founder Charlie Kim, the brand initially went viral via Lizzo review and today draws vegan and vegan curious diners to its outposts in LA, San Francisco, and Sydney to sample its frowny meals and not a burgers.

In the intervening years, McDonald's has abandoned its own plant based protein sandwich, the McPlant, leaving clones like this to fill the void. Whether the concept's momentum ultimately pushes the big m back to veggie burgers or they instead keep feeding americans unending demands for cheap, low quality meat, one has to admit architect Stanley Clark Meston was right about the fries. This week on Doughboys, Mister Charlie's welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Weiger, along with my co host, director of the Oscar nominated calzone of interest, Jonathan Bathtub Glazer, the Spoon man, Mike Mitchell. Jonathan Bathtub.

Yeah, like your glazing. Jonathan Glazer, bathtub glazer. Bathtub glazer. Alex from Seattle sent that n roast@birdfuck.com. Dot why did I just picked up on the Jonathan bathtub when Glazer was the word I should have been thinking about?

That's what you're glazing. Bathtubs. Calzone. I know. I got it, I guess.

Calzone of interest about food. Yeah. Yes. Movie about the holocaust. Movie.

Mike Mitchell

There's a joke on that. That's what that was a play on the, play on the, like, very hard to watch a movie. That is very sad. We changed it to Calz. This guy changed it to Calzone.

Emma

A bitch. Yes. And then the, the director who gave a, you know, a fiery speech at the oscars, Jonathan bathtub Glazer about jacking off. I think this is a perfect joke. And a jack off.

Mike Mitchell

I think it's the perfect roast. I think it's a pretty good roast. Yeah. Alex, thanks for sending that in. Jonathan bathtub Glazer haven't glazed the tub.

Oh, not true.

I did recently. Not this morning. Wives, let me tell you. Hey, good for you. You took a break.

Nick Weiger

Give yourself a day off every now, once in a while. This morning I get in. Yeah, this morning, technically, before noon. Sure. I get in the shower.

Mike Mitchell

Ice cold shower. Oh, boy. And it's the. I guess. I don't know.

I don't know if we have any plumbers who listen to the show, but. We do have some plumbers who listen to this show. All right, I need your help. Cause I think there's a tankless water heater at my place. Okay.

Nick Weiger

Now I hear that can be, like, both a blessing and a curse to me. It feels like it's only been a curse. Yeah. People are like, oh, tankless. It sounds so futuristic.

But then it's got all sorts of problems. Well, then where's the water? If there's no damn tank? That's what I wanna know. Jackie.

Emma

Yeah. Where's the fucking water? Where's the water if there's no tank? I'm with you on this. If you're a plumber out there, give us some answers.

Nick Weiger

Where's the fucking water? Mine gets every, like every year. I think you have to service them. Maybe that's why it gets cold every year. But, like, this happens every year.

Jackie Johnson

It could be your heat could be out. Your gas could be out. That could be an issue. It could be the gas. Shit.

Mike Mitchell

Good. Your whole house could be burnt up right now. Cause there's a gas leak. Wall e and Irma are in that house. They're fine.

Nick Weiger

Wally and Irma are fine. I should probably. I should probably head out for the day. Check your ring cam. He is gonna actually do it now.

Mike Mitchell

There are two notifications. Okay. Uh oh. Let me tell you. Wags.

Emma

Yeah. It was some worm hibernate. You okay? You can retake it. Are you cold?

Yeah. From your cold shower. There was some worm hibernation. I was gonna say, my dick turned into like, a walnut. Got it.

Nick Weiger

I got it. You're being. Playing that a little too subtle there. I was very. It was, like, the coldest shower I've ever taken in my life.

Mike Mitchell

It was horrifying. So you just went for it? You're just like, well, I guess I got a shower and pot. Committed. Here's the issue.

I didn't shower yesterday. I was cleaning my place up. I was, like, being good. I just spent the whole day cleaning it up. And then I was like, I'm not gonna shower.

This is a gross mess today. I'll shower tomorrow morning. You go to bed all gross then. Cause I would want to shower before I go to bed. Yeah, no, I get that, but I was just.

Whatever. Yeah, I get it. You're fatigued. Yeah. And I wanna shower before I came here.

Nick Weiger

Sure. Naturally. Yeah. I guess I could do a night shower and then a morning shower, but whatever. I was going to bed.

Mike Mitchell

Is it that gross? That? Yes. Well, that's gross. Yes, it is.

Jackie Johnson

It's fucking disgusting.

Mike Mitchell

I'll clean the sheets. I clean my sheets. I don't glaze my sheets. You made more work for yourself, though. You have to go home and change your damn dirty sheets.

Yeah, that's all right. But I was. I get in the shower. Ice. Just ice.

The coldest cold you could imagine. Yeah. Before it turns to ice. It was the coldest cold. Have you ever done a cold plunge?

Emma

No. Cause those are supposed to be really good for your immune system. Oh, wait. I've done a polar plunge in New Year's. We were down Cape Cod, and it was truly one of the worst.

Mike Mitchell

I ran into the ocean, but it was low tide. Yeah. And so I was, like, running into the ocean. I could feel it, like, on my legs. I was like, fuck, this fucking hurts.

And then, like, had to run out far enough to just, like, get under the water, and I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. It was not. It was not good. Are you cold? Quandary?

Jackie Johnson

No. Hell, no. I'll sometimes do, like, I'll do the steam room at the gym, and then I'll go over and go right into a cold shower. That's fun. That's refresh fun.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, but that's not as extreme. I don't think. The cold plunge, I think, is its own thing. Where's the steam. Where's the steam shower?

What? I said, where's the steam shower? He said the damn. Oh, he's in the gym. I didn't hear you.

Yeah, all right. The gym. Could you introduce me or what? We got Mitch has a drop. Has a drop to play what gym you go to?

No, don't worry about it. He docks my fucking gym. Yeah. He wants some privacy in his life. I want to know what fucking Jimmy goes to.

Mike Mitchell

Emma, hit him with a drop. You. An equinox. Words in papers, words in books. I know words.

Cantankerous words on tv. Words. Books. Oh, that's just a great word. Cantankerous words to tell you what to do.

Here's another word for you. Condensation. Words are working hard for you. Wait, you mean condescension? Condescending condensation.

Jackie Johnson

It was very schoolhouse rock. Very much so. It was a good drop. Was that electric company? What was the source there?

Mike Mitchell

Oh, hold on a second. Let's see here. Let me look this up. Yeah, take your time. Let's see here.

Emma

All right. Well, Holly and Irma look good at the house.

Jackie Johnson

And they're not wearing ventilators. And I can't find the email, so I don't know, Emma. I sent it an hour here. I got it. I can't see it.

Emilia Marino

Hi, do fam. I made this drop as a tribute to Mitch's love of words back in 2018. I took a date to your outside land show in San Francisco, and somehow she agreed to marry me six years later. Our wedding is next month. Thanks for all the last, Jordan.

Nick Weiger

Congratulations. Congrats, Jordan. Perhaps they've tied the knot as of this episode's release because we're recording a little bit in advance. Wow. How about that?

Congratulations. I hope you get a prenup.

Drops@Birdfuck.Com. Our guest from Natchebute, her new live show is how to get a second husband. Would you. Speaking of prenups, you can see how. To get a second husband live.

April 21 in Dallas and April 28 in Austin. Jackie Johnson is back. The jackster. The jackster. And now, because podcasts are all video now.

Jackie Johnson

Yes, I'm being filmed. So y'all can check this out. YouTube.com. People are gonna love it. Bellboy.

There you go. Yeah, check it out. See how I'm looking these days? Check out that video. Well, they certainly don't come to see how we're looking.

Hey, listen, the legs on Weyger are looking really good. The gym is paying off. Yeah. What? He won't tell me what gym this is.

Nick Weiger

We'll talk about it afterwards. Why'd I fucking say it in front of all. You're afraid that the fan. You're afraid doughboys listeners are gonna come to your gym. Mitch, I had this incident.

I told. I said this in the blank. Doe text thread. Our group chat with the. With the guys at blank check.

I had an incident at the gym. I brought it close. What's that? You spill some weights? He fucking.

Mike Mitchell

He's a spilly bitch. You say spill some what? Some weights? I thought he said, spill some whites. That's what I thought of.

Nick Weiger

That was like a jacking off thing. Spilling whites. Spilling whites. Pretty good. Bathtub Glazer again.

The shower was revolting because Mitch was spilling too much whites in there. They're like, we're gonna be cold only from now on. Keep em out of here. Ma. I spilled some whites in my sleep last night.

Someone snuck into my room and spilled whites all over me. I don't know how it happened. Anyway, wait, what happened? What was the story? Here's your story.

Here's the story. I was in the blank dough thread. I relayed this previously. I went to the gym and I brought a change of clothes. I did my routine.

I went in the steam room. I went and did the cold shower. Then I do a hog out. Yeah. What am I.

I do want to know that you have your hog out on occasion. Yeah. You don't have to be, like, in full view. Damn. All right.

Emma

You got it to this gym? No, I'm coming to this fucking gym. No, I think you're. I think people are like, and if it was european, I think everyone would have their hogs out. I think in an american thing, people are a little bit more modest.

Jackie Johnson

You just never know. There's people who are just, like, blow drying their pubes freely. Yeah. And then there's more, like, covering up. I'm not that guy, but I'm also not the guy who's got the towel wrapped around his waist while he pulls down his underwear and pulls on a new pair of underwear.

Emma

Like, I'm not. That's me. That's me. That's me. If I have to, like, if I have to, like, whatever, I'll drop the towel for a second and get changed.

Nick Weiger

Anyway, this relates to that because I did not bring a change of underwear. So I took my shower, I went to get dressed. I had my civilian clothes, and I forgot to bring clean underwear. So I was like, I guess I'll fucking free ball it out of here. So I go.

I walk out, no underwear on. And a fan approaches me and says, like, oh, my God. Like, hey, I just. I saw you working out. I didn't want to say anything, but I want to say.

And he, like, had a conversation. Oh, you were nude while you're free balling? Well, I. No, I had pants on, but I had no, like, underwear on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Emilia Marino

That fan is now listening to this episode going, that was me.

Mike Mitchell

You had pants on. I know, but I felt very exposed. You ever wear pants without underwear? It's a weird feeling all the time. I'm just kidding.

Jackie Johnson

I never do. It's perverted. Yeah. Hogs out is a good. Knives out, the porn parody.

Mike Mitchell

It is. It's good. Yeah. No one actually fucks in the end. Yeah.

There's no real mystery fucking here. It's just dumb. This is dumb. But are the hogs out? The hogs, right, sure.

Yeah. Jackster. Gotta get to this fucking gym. I'm gonna search some gyms here. Gym's in his area.

Nick Weiger

Jackster, I wanted. It's been a little bit since we had yawn. We talked about creation last time. Are you still frequenting creation? The juicery?

Jackie Johnson

I don't leave my house much. Okay, sure. But when I'm in the area, you better believe it, baby. I get that orange sunrise smoothie with the vegan protein and the coconut water that tastes like Zeus jizz. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

All right. Yes. Always. I still am a fan. Yes.

Emma

Wow. Okay. We had kind of a zeusy jizz item today. Yes, we did. Save it.

Mike Mitchell

When you were saying we talked about creation, I forgot that it was that. And I was like. And I didn't even bat an eye. I was like, yeah, I guess we just talked about, like, the creation of life or some shit that we go. Into, like, the Old Testament.

I mean, I thought maybe we're talking about the Old Testament. When I first. I keep slamming on jemmy as I emphasize points. I don't mean, to. She's liking me.

Emma

I think she's okay with it. Yeah, she's fine. Do y'all remember the episode before that, what we did? Menchies. Oh, menchies.

Of course. Of course I remember Menchienchis. Yeah. I also haven't been back there in a long time. That's a whole thing where I think, post COVID, I just have a very different approach towards self serve.

Yes. Like, I'm just like. And we've done some salad bars and such on the podcast, but, like, a self serve yogurt top. I wonder if they still even have out the toppings and whatnot. Yeah, I don't know.

Nick Weiger

Some of the places do it behind the counter now, but I don't know if Menchi's has migrated to that sort of. I did like menchies. I thought it was a. I did like menchies. Menchies is fun.

Jackie Johnson

I think we gave it four spoons. We maybe did. We were pretty emphatic about our fandom of. Of Menchies back then, but I haven't returned to it, not since the podcast. That was pre COVID.

Emma

Yeah, that was pretty. Y'all have me on every three years. So I was here in 2018, 2021, and now 2024. Here we are. Every three years, we get up the frequency.

Mike Mitchell

We get up the frequency. The show sucks. I'm available.

Jackie Johnson

I wait patiently by the email like, it's three years. Any minute now, I'm gonna get that. Email, and it's here. I'm here. From our perspective, we always feel like we're bothering people when we ask them to do the same.

You are. But some of us have things to promote. I have a show to promote. I'm happy to talk all about it with y'all. The show is how to get a second husband.

Emma

Yes. Wait, so tell us about the show. And as of this episode's release, you'll have done it in LA. Yes. But you're taking it on the road a little bit.

Yes. So in 2018, when I came on, I was with my first husband. Yes. 2021, I came on, I was with my second husband, and I was pregnant with my child. Secretly.

Yes. And now here we are in 2024. I am a mother, and I'm still with the second husband. This one seems to be sticking. All right.

Jackie Johnson

So I wrote a show. It's a motivational Tony Robbins esque seminar about how to change your life in order to get a second husband. That's the way to really do it. Wow. So we go through all the steps of what you do to get to your second husband.

Mike Mitchell

I said this as I was coming in. I saw a car, and there was, like, a baby on board looking sticker on the back. I said, that must be Jackie. She's here. All people that bear children have to put one of those stickers on their cards.

Jackie Johnson

California law. Would you like to share what the sticker says on the. It says baby up in this bitch. Yeah. Which I saw.

Mike Mitchell

And I was like, oh, it's definitely Jackie. Yeah. All of them are very nice. There's, like, little stork. It says baby.

Jackie Johnson

And I just saw that one. I was like, yeah, it's perfect. It. Me. Yeah.

As they say on the memes, I. Saw a bumper sticker on the highway a little while back that said, mIlf, man, I love frogs. That's pretty good. Wow, that's good. I don't know if that's some aquariums thing or what.

Nick Weiger

I didn't know what the source of. It was, but Mil, man, I love. Was it a lady? Did you catch a grill? Yeah, I didn't see.

It was Miss Piggy.

Jackie Johnson

That would have been such a good sighting. Would have been. Can you imagine? Yeah, she's great. I haven't seen a single.

Mike Mitchell

Have I seen a Muppet? I haven't seen a single muppet since I've been in Hollywood. Yeah, I've never seen either. Well, I mean, now 20 years. I worked at Jim Henson lot for a while and on a show, and I never saw a muppet there.

Emma

Wow. I saw some fraggles. I saw the dinosaurs. I saw some Ninja Turtles, but I did not see the. You ever get confused with that boring ass Muppet, Walter.

Nick Weiger

Is that the Jason Siegel Muppet? Muppet from the Muppets reboot.

I just thought maybe that's who. The guy at the gym. That's who he thought you were. Oh, Walter. He also doesn't wear underwear.

Love the Muppets reboot. I think most wanted even more. The birthday boys wanted to, like, we talked about having offices at the Henson. You were on that Henson? It was on the lot.

Emma

Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. It was cool. Kermit is right there at the top of the entrance.

Jackie Johnson

Yes, he is. Yeah. It's like a real. Like, it's not the greatest block, because. And, you know, right up the street from it is.

Nick Weiger

I think that really. That very high volume chick fil a, and there's like, a kind of shitty burger King right there. So, like, it's not, like, the best, like, the funnest area, and then there's, like, a strip club, like, right across the street, but it is a block over, but still. It is. There's.

Right, right. That same general area, but it's. I like that, you know, your hyper local fast food geography. I remember when they. When they put that in there.

Jackie Johnson

That's how long I've been here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's also, like, as someone from the south, it's like, chick fil a was not out here for a long time. Did you ever go to that? It's a nightmare.

Shaking my head no. I'm sorry. For those not watching on YouTube. When chick fil a opened downtown, it was 2010, which is the year I went vegan. And I did go, and it got waffle fries as, like, a celebratory moment.

Nick Weiger

Right. That's fun. Yeah. That chick fil a I was very excited about. And then going on there once, I was like, I'm not gonna.

Mike Mitchell

This is too much. I maybe had it, like, three times. Did the hype ever die down, or is there still huge lines every day? No, they're still pretty. Pretty substantial cues.

Nick Weiger

I mean, it's died down a little bit, but I think now, like, the hype is the eye of Sauron is on raising canes as far as. Oh, yes. But it's still, like an in n out. People love raisin canes. People love raisin canes.

Mike Mitchell

Let me tell you something. I was on the way to get a ct scan the other night, and.

Nick Weiger

Everything'S okay. You should tell people. Cause they're gonna worry. Just everything's fine.

Mike Mitchell

They were trying to see where my hog went after my cold shower way up there. Wait, is it ct or head scan or. No, it can be a full body scan. Did you do a full body? I did abdomen and chest.

Jackie Johnson

I want to do one of those full body ones. They're, like, $1,500. Oh, man. I do not want to do that. I do.

I want to know everything wrong with me. I'd be so claustrophobic on one of those. I wanted to get head. I wanted to get my head scanned. I think it would have been worth it.

Nick Weiger

Couldn't fit your head in the machine.

Mike Mitchell

The radiation also, I guess, is like. I mean, it's not like. I guess, but it still is, like, not nothing. Yeah, sure. It's like a.

Nick Weiger

No, you don't want to subject yourself to too many of them. Yeah. And then it turns out that there was nothing wrong. Nothing was wrong. I have a bit of a fatty liver, which is weird, because we've hosted a fast food podcast for ten years, but on my way over there.

Mike Mitchell

Wags. Yeah? Come to a dead stop in the road. What the hell is this line? What are people going into?

Can you guess what it was? It's a chain we've reviewed, and it's not Raisin Cane, and it's not Raisin. Kane, and it's not chick fil a. In and out. It was not in and out.

Jackie Johnson

I feel like there's always lines. Oh, is it the Starbucks drive thru? It was not the Starbucks drive thru. It's kind of an interesting. It's an interesting weird one.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, interesting one. Okay, so I'm thinking off the beaten path a little bit. I'm gonna say one of the last still standing wienerschnitzels. Nope. Hmm.

Is it that sort of category? Is this fun? I'm on the edge of my seat. Yeah, I'm having a blast. Is it that category?

Is it like a fast food fast food chain, or is it more of like an upscale, sort of like closer to a paquito? Mom, it's a fast food fast food chain. I would say. Is it a regional chain or is it national? It's international.

It's international. Okay. I mean, I'm just gonna get. I'll guess the big ones. Yoshinoia beef ball.

Mike Mitchell

That's a great guess. That's a great guess. It was not that. I'll guess KFC. No, but you're in the right direction.

Nick Weiger

Popeyes. No. Even? No, but church's chicken. Do you want me to get.

Mike Mitchell

Want me to tell you? No no no. We'll figure this out. All right. All right.

Nick Weiger

When you say we're in the right direction, do you mean chicken wise? Fried chicken was a good thought. Fried chicken was a good thought. Oh, is it that hot chicken sandwich place everybody goes to? Dave's hot chicken?

Mike Mitchell

Not Dave's hot. Okay. Is it the other one? Right? Cause we'd have to have a drive through.

Think more. Internationally. Panda Express. Banchon. No, I think it's that other hot chicken place.

Jackie Johnson

The Korean. Is that a korean hot chicken? Keep going. Just tell us. Well, I guess Bonchon, but it's not Bonchon.

Mike Mitchell

I can't believe you haven't gotten this yet. Well, I'm sure when I hear it, I will be like, oh, of course you'll be mad. You can't think of it right now. We've done it twice. I believe we've done it twice.

Nick Weiger

Churches I mentioned? KFC, bojangles. There's not one out here. Popeyes I mentioned. What's what?

Can I not see that's right in front of my face? I think I got a guess. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Is it el pollo loco? No.

Is that the right. The right region? That's the right reason, but Casey's gonna fucking knock you off right now. Well, let's see. Jollibee.

Mike Mitchell

That's right. Wow. Jollibee. Casey's got it. Jollibee, you idiot.

Casey got it. Is it that one on western? Uh, no, it was not on western. It was, uh. It was, uh.

Cause it was going the other way. It was perpendicular. I reject you calling me an idiot, by the way. That's a bad hint. It's not just a fried chicken place.

Nick Weiger

It also has spaghetti. Spaghetti. It has burgers. It has a full fucking menu. I said not a chicken concept, so how dare you say I'm fucking dumb?

Casey did a good job guessing, but your hit was no help. Cause Casey's smart. I said right direction with fried chicken. Jollibee's known for fried chicken. One of the many things they're known for.

I'm not gonna say they got a bunch going on. Well, we would have gotten it then. Yeah, you fool. Do y'all like Jollibee? I do like Jollibee.

Emma

Have you had it? Casey made you look like a fool. Casey's making you look like a damn fool. Oh, why? Because he gave me your clothes?

Nick Weiger

Fucking clue. I don't know. He seemed to get it. Pretty easy to get it. Yeah, but process of elimination.

Mike Mitchell

Think internationally. Panda Express, that is. Bitch, that's a good guess. Sure thing. The California chain.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, it was founded in California, but it's an international cuisine. You've learned nothing these past ten years. Y'all should just do episodes where you try to guess each other's restaurants you're thinking of. All right, let me. I'll do it right now.

Mike Mitchell

In n out burger. Yeah. Got it.

Nick Weiger

Jackster. Let's recap for us your plant based diet, because that's part of what we're talking about today. Okay. So, like, you're someone who, I know was pretty vegan for a while. Is that still pretty much the case?

Mike Mitchell

Sorry. Fucking unloaded one and learned a silver bullet right during the show. I'm sorry. That's the loudest I've ever heard somebody open a drink in my life. I was.

I was like, should I go the slow route? And then I was. Thought he would be mad if it was like, just like a. Yeah. For 10 seconds.

So I was like, let's just fucking pull the trigger on this. Yeah, yeah. But then it shocked everyone. I'm sorry, but spilled white. I did not spill white.

Jackie Johnson

That's what I thought happened. I looked over. Okay, yes, I'm spilling. Stop. We're talking about me now.

Emma

Yes. 2010, New Year's Eve. Mm hmm. I had a chicken salad. That was the last time I consumed the flesh of an animal.

Nick Weiger

Wow. I'm so mad at how it went out for you. Yeah. 2010 chicken salad on YouTube. I made it.

Jackie Johnson

And I made it so it wasn't even, like, jollibee or something. A New Year's Eve chicken salad? Yeah. Was it like a. When you say chicken salad, was it a salad with chicken as a protein or, like, a chicken salad?

No, I was in Malibu. I was house sitting. I used to be a celebrity dog walker. I went to that vons or whatever, that one grocery store off the PCH, and I got a bagged salad and a chicken breast. And I believe I cooked it and then chopped it up and ate it in a salad.

Emma

Wow. Wow. Oh, I think I was thinking chicken. Like, mayo chicken. That's why I asked.

Jackie Johnson

Oh, no, no. It was, like. It was a good question. Spring mix, which I hate. Spring mix now.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, I'm kind of over there. You're still mad at me over the game? Yeah, of course. Wasn't my fault. This is gonna be a damn mess.

Mike Mitchell

Mad at me about the game, folks. You chose to take the taunting route. I know. It was fun at the end. Casey got it.

Nick Weiger

It was fun. I was. I was. Wait. I was.

You reap what you sow. I wanted you to get it so bad. I wanted you to get it. You should have said that. It wasn't just chicken, though, because we were all on the chicken.

Mike Mitchell

I never said it was only just chicken. You said it was on the right track with KFC. Review the tapes celebrity dog Walker. So I want to know some of these celebrity dogs. Yeah.

Nick Weiger

Rintin Tin Benji. I actually did walk famous dogs. White. Really? Yeah, I walked acting dogs.

Emma

Whoa. Wow. I walked. I guess it's okay to say this. Cause I didn't sign anything.

Jackie Johnson

I used to walk Pete Wentz's bulldog, Hemingway. Whoa. Famous. I would get stopped. People would be like, that's Hemingway.

Wentz is really. They just recognized he was on merch. He was in the videos. I think he's on one of their album covers. He was very.

He was a beautiful english bulldog that had a very, like, unique look. Yeah. Cause I would just be like, it's a bulldog. I don't think I recognize a bulldog. No, people would always follow me, and then people would be wrong, too.

Like, because I had a bunch of dogs with me. They would assume I'm walking and they'd be like, that's George Clooney's mastiff, or whatever. And I'd be like, no, it's not, freak. Did you ever walk looey dog? The sublime dog?

Mike Mitchell

Loo dog. I think he had passed. Oh, yeah, that's probably. Yeah, I think he had passed. Did you walk the dog from Calzone of interest?

I'm sorry? Zone of interest. I wish. Snoop, snoop, snoop. Oh, no, that's from.

Oh, wait, no, that's from anatomy of a fall. Yeah. Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah. Did you see that?

I did, I did. I like. I like zone of interest. Sandra Fuller, the actor. Yeah.

Movies. Yeah. Wonderful year for her. Yeah, I like good movies. You know what I think was the best Oscar movie?

Jackie Johnson

Poor thing. Did y'all see that? I think it was so much better than all the other ones. I don't. I.

Nick Weiger

Look, I liked old Oscar movies. There was nothing where I was like. I was like, that doesn't belong here. Really? Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

Even Maestro. I loved Maestro Jaxter. I'm a huge maestro. Head maestro is one of my favorite movies the last year. I love the maestro.

Mike Mitchell

You know what? Good take there. I liked all the movies this fucking. What the fuck? I'm talking about the nominees.

Nick Weiger

It's not always the case. I know. I don't like every movie that comes out. I have movies I dislike. Name the last movie you saw you disliked.

Let me look through my list. Whoa, okay, hold on. I gotta go. My Google Doc here, the type a king over silver. Say fucking tomorrow war.

Emma

So you had. I watched Maestro. I couldn't even watch it. I turned it off. I'm sorry, Bradley.

Mike Mitchell

I didn't like it. Like, really? Yeah. I need to give it a second chance. Well, no, I don't.

Nick Weiger

I mean, it might just not be for you. I mean, I just liked how. I definitely get why it's polarizing if someone's like, I did not like that movie. Natalie did not, like, not care for it on the same level. Other movie, I just feel like it was Oscar bait.

Jackie Johnson

I could feel him, how bad he wanted the Oscar. I kind of disagree just because I. Feel like they made a good point about this. You and the blank dough guys. I think it's such a weird.

Nick Weiger

Like, there's a straightforward check guys. Yeah, well, we are the blank doe guys. The blank doe guys make a point. I think this is that. If you're going to try to create Oscar bait, you make a different movie.

This is such a weirdly audacious. And I know there was, like, a tourist scene where he. Movie. He orchestrates for a long, long time. Yeah, yeah.

Jackie Johnson

Cause I heard him interviewed on Howard Stern about it, and so that's why I was excited to watch it. Maybe I should give it a second chance. You don't necessarily need to. Okay, movies. Last movie I thought was okay.

Okay, thank you. I didn't like drive away dolls. I thought that was pretty bad. That was pretty hard to make it. Who's in that?

Oh, quali. Yes, yes, yes. I do like her, but I did not care for that movie. Let's see. How many have you seen this year, Tony movie head?

Nick Weiger

I like watching. What's your number right now? Let's hear it. Cause we're. This is what you've seen this year.

As of this record. My count's at 48 this year. Oh, my God. That's how many movies I see. No, no, no.

Not in a theater. Stuff I'll watch at home, too. Or rewatches. I count it all as one list. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

Let's see where my number is. I got nothing going on. What am I supposed to do? I come here and I do a podcast and I go home and watch a fucking movie? Or play Baldur's Gate.

Nick Weiger

Who gives a shit? I still seem to fucking complain about it enough. Let's see here. Maybe we had better quizzes on the fucking show. What do you play?

Baldur's Gate three. Baldur's? Yeah, Baldur's Gate three. What's that? Video game?

Yeah, it is. Yeah. It's even. It's like a role playing game. Yeah, it's really good.

Jackie Johnson

I'm like, I play the sims. Ooh, okay, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Been playing a long time. Which sims do you play?

I play sims. Free play, which is the iPad version. Oh, interesting. I didn't realize there was a mobile one. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

Was this something that you played? I'm trying to find my movie list from this year, but was that something that you played back in the day and stuck with you? I started playing in 2001, Sims Og. And then I played that a long time, like, into college. I took a break for a decade or so, and then I got sims freeplay on my iPad, like, over ten years ago.

Jackie Johnson

I've been playing. Wow. Emma's chiming in. You were a sims head. We bonded over this when we worked together.

Emilia Marino

Our love for sims. I was like, don't you have a rosebud? Tattoo from the sims. Yeah, I just got it. Yeah, this is the money code for free money and sims original.

Nick Weiger

I love that. I just redownloaded sims four, like a month ago. And I thought about you the second. I did it, and I was like. Jackie would be so proud of you.

Jackie Johnson

It's a slippery slope. I just saw they're making a sims movie and I need to get. I know there's a lot of Hollywood types listening. Yes. I need to be in this movie.

I don't care if I'm background. Somebody help me get. We can make this happen. Please. Are they gonna talk Simslish in the movie?

Emma

I hope. Simlish, I hope. Yeah. Cause I'm fluent in Simlish already. I could nail the audition.

Mike Mitchell

You can't have a full movie where they speak Simlish, right? Oh, why not? Isn't it like that kind of stuff? Oh, that's what? That's.

Emma

That's good. Fuck, that's good. That's pretty good. You know, ready? You know, call me Margo.

Emilia Marino

What they're actually saying with the little bubble over their head, so it's okay. That would be insane for a full movie, but I kind of like it. I like that idea more. I mean, I think you do the. Hunt for Red October, you do the dead reckoning.

Nick Weiger

They do the same thing where they kind of like, push in and then they push Avatar. They do the same thing in fucking Avatar way of water. Similar. You're hearing similar and then it turns to English or whatever. We can read subtitles.

Jackie Johnson

We all just sat through a zone of interest. Yeah. Why can't we sit through simlish for an hour? That's true. Zone of interest can do it.

Mike Mitchell

Why not the Sims movie. Exactly. Very similar themes. Prisoners being controlled.

Jackie Johnson

Call me. I've watched 24 movies this year. Oh my God. Which is. I need to make lists.

Mike Mitchell

We can't say what it is. You don't like me dating things, so I'm not gonna say what date. I already said we're in advance. Okay. All right.

Emma

Yeah. It's the end. It's. We're in the ides of March. Is that correct?

Nick Weiger

We're a little after the ides of March. What the fuck is the ides of March? I think it's just march. March 15. Oh.

Emma

Hmm. There's PI day. The 14th. Then the ides are the 15th. Two big days in a row.

Mike Mitchell

What the fuck are the ides of March? Why are we gonna beware of them? What the fuck is going on? Caesar. Yeah.

Nick Weiger

The Julius Caesar. The Caesars. That's when you're gonna get fucking Merc? Oh, that's when it gets Merc. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

Got it, got it. And Brutus is like, bam. It's like a two brute. Brutus sounds a lot like fucking weiger. Jollibee.

Brutus was like, emeril.

Nick Weiger

Bam. You remember Emeril lagasse? Yeah, yeah, I'm familiar. Emeril rocks. Okay, so you mentioned.

So you haven't had meat at all. Animal protein since 2010? Well, if you count fish. I have had fish. Okay, sure.

Emma

Yeah. What was that? What did you do? Sushi. Told y'all.

Jackie Johnson

Yeah, I told y'all in 2021 that I had a few weak moments during my divorce where I was, like, having sushi with David Spade in Hawaii, and I was, like, eating tuna or whatever. I mean, come on, who's gonna turn down sushi with David Spade and Hawaii? For the whole tab? You gotta do it, nobu. Honolulu?

Nick Weiger

Are you kidding me? I'll take two, please. And I sat next to Rob Schneider, and I didn't know his politics at the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a fascinating conversation.

Mike Mitchell

I would like to sit down and talk politics with Schneider. Cause I was like, I'm vegan, but I'm eating fish right now. Don't tell. And he was like, you know, the groundwater's poison. It's actually smart.

Jackie Johnson

You do that like, it was really interesting. We had a really interesting conversation. He's very. He's. Yeah, me and him, I think we'll.

Nick Weiger

Get him in the studio. Yeah, we'll break it down. Okay. So that. And then last time I was on doughboys, I said I was secretly pregnant.

Jackie Johnson

So I didn't eat, like, sushi or anything. I was, by the way, secret from us at the time, too, while we were recording it. We did not. Yes. Yes, I was.

It's one of those things you're supposed to not tell anybody for a while. Or whatever, and this fucking guy, he's gonna make some comment about it on this podcast. What the fuck you mean? Like, he's trying to fucking dox your gym? Yeah, you'd spill the beans.

Emma

You think? I'm like, remember Jackie came. She's pregnant. Boobs. And Emma wouldn't at least stop it.

So is it live? This isn't live stream. This is not live. Oh, shit. We're also too dumb that we probably wouldn't pick up on you being pregnant ever.

Mike Mitchell

We're idiots. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it was over zoom, too, so it's not like. Yeah, you couldn't see or anything. We see you holding a baby and be like, hi, baby.

Emma

We wouldn't get it. We're fools. Yeah. This guy couldn't even get Jollibee. Yeah, it's true.

Jackie Johnson

I couldn't either, though, so. Okay, so he should. He works on the fast food. I really wanted to try and be like, have a vegan pregnancy. It was not easy.

Emma

Yeah. But I did it. And then when I was breastfeeding, I wasn't super vegan. I did eat some eggs and things a couple times. I was just trying to get my supply up.

Nick Weiger

Are you sure? Are you told to? Right. Like, isn't it like, a lot of doctors recommend that you eat something like a. Yeah, probably.

Jackie Johnson

I mean, the whole time when you're pregnant, they take your. Especially when you're, like, older, they take your blood, like, every five minutes. And I never told them I was vegan, and I never had any. They never said, like, oh, you're low on iron, blah, blah, blah. Interesting.

Cause, you know, I've been doing it so long, I know how to not die. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But so then I was on dumbbells semi recently. That's right. Are y'all on a thread with them?

The dough bells? We're not. We don't have a dough balls. We can make that happen. Yeah.

Start one. And I was telling them. Well, I'll say this. Yeah. Last night I was just, like, cleaning up the house and I looked.

Mike Mitchell

I was like, I only have 30 text messages. Not bad. Wow. I look at my phone, ten minutes later, 175 text messages from so. And from.

Jackie Johnson

No checks. I mean, there's. There's. It's always. It always revolves around.

Nick Weiger

Not always us. I mean, we create a lot of text. Yeah, of course. When you said sending text is what causes text to. Of course.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just saying this a lot about. Just out, like, movies and. Yeah. Food.

Jackie Johnson

Yeah, okay. Yeah. Honestly, it's mostly about food. It's mostly about food. Movies.

It's great. I love when men have friendships and, eh.

Mike Mitchell

I don't know what I would categorize it as. Interesting. Ultra co workers, like, extreme coworking.

Jackie Johnson

That's where a lot of adults meet their friends, is what's true. That's true. Yeah. No shame in the game. Imagine working at a place with just, like, one other guy.

Mike Mitchell

And, like, that guy is wise. There's other people here. I mean, yeah, I know. I like him.

Nick Weiger

Out there. Go talk to the hunks. But I'm saying, like, you know, it's like, when I started this job, it's like, I'm going into this new job, and it's like, this guy is the guy. Hey, buddy. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

You didn't know you'd still be here ten years later. No one knew this was gonna go this way. No one. No one knew that. No, no.

Nick Weiger

How could we have known? And will it go ten more years after that? No. So we've at least gotten halfway, Mitch. Honestly.

We'll see at this point. Cause I would have said. I would have agree. I would have said, though, like, five years ago. It's like, no way this thing goes another five years.

Who fucking knows? Yeah. You're gonna turn that fountain off? You gonna turn that nozzle off? You're talking about, like, the nozzle.

Mike Mitchell

You're talking about jacking off in my shower. What are you talking about? We're gonna be doing the show. I'm gonna be in a ct machine, just fucking getting scanned constantly, fucking doing the pot. It's gonna.

I can. We can't. We talked about this this week. We did talk about the health. It's getting bad.

Nick Weiger

We can figure some stuff out. Yeah. Don't you wear, like, a sleep apnea mask? I heard I would wear. I have to.

Mike Mitchell

I can't. I can't even do it. Cause I wore it and I got. I got vertigo. Oh, God.

I have to go to a pulmonologist. Ooh. I don't even know what that is. I have a lot of people confused with a paxinologist. I don't know what that is either.

Nick Weiger

Crowbart in that fucking joke again. Everyone's like, Mitch Paxton and Pullman. We love it. Oh, I get it. Frailty.

That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Frailty. Great movie.

Jackie Johnson

Great movie. He directed that one. Great movie. Isn't that wild? He directed frailty.

What a twist. Yeah, we won't tell you the twist. Add it to your lists, everyone. Is that is the only film Paxton directed? Yeah, I think.

Mike Mitchell

I think it was that weird time where, like, maybe it wasn't considered a big hit. You know what I mean? And, no, I think it did okay. But I did okay. I mean, like, it felt like he didn't really direct much after that.

Nick Weiger

No, that's the thing. I'm always fascinated by someone who's, like, directed, like, one movie, and they're like, all right, I'm good. Well, maybe it was a bad experience. It could be. Yeah.

I never heard anything. Those studio notes. That's. Hey, we get headgum steer notes all the time. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah. Can you guys look better?

Nick Weiger

Hey, you had the studio in a two hour block. Can you start on time? It was too real. That's fair. So where was I?

Where were you? I said on dumbbells recently that I'm raising a child, and you have to teach the child literally everything. And so I have to teach my son how to eat. And he's not vegan. I'm not raising him vegan.

Jackie Johnson

I'm outnumbered. And I also. Are you gonna let him make that choice? Yes. That's nice.

I'm gonna let him decide when he's cognitive enough to do that, which will be a long time from now. I just. It's a hard knock alive for the vegans. It's not easy. Yeah.

And I would. I would have to assume that children's vegan food especially seems harder. Right? Yeah. Yeah.

I just. I'm gonna let him decide. So he's eating yogurt. He's eating meat. He's eating it.

All of it. And he would, like, be eating. And he would go, mommy, here. And he'd, like, try to make me eat the spoon. And I would just go, okay, yogurt.

It was disgusting. Oh, man. Disgusting. But I ate it, you know? But then, by the way, if you need to call in some pinch hitters.

Just to know, greek yogurt is very healthy. I mean, you know, it's got a lot of protein and whatnot. Did you like yogurt before? I don't. I just feel like, listen, I don't want to be the annoying vegan I've breastfed now.

I have bared a child. I would never want to put another person through that or an animal. Like, it's just a lot like, honestly, I think dairy is more evil than meat. Fascinating. Truly.

Nick Weiger

That's really interesting. So, by the way, when you ask them about yogurt, we're on a yogurt text thread that's not even. We do have a joke. That's not even a joke. That is real.

Mike Mitchell

We have a yogurt chat. Yeah. With, like, gotta anastasia from Dunktown. Is it like, you buy yogurts at the store and talk about them? Some of that.

Emma

Okay. Cause also, like, the siggy's plant based yogurt is legit, and it's 10 grams of protein. So when you're revolted by yogurt, it's not. It's more on a conceptual level as opposed to the flavor. Yogurt with the blue dot next to it.

Wow. What does it say? Side chain. No, no, no, not that one. Sorry.

Jackie Johnson

Oh, sorry. Gert chat. I'm sorry. There are three blue dots. Thank you.

So please be more specific.

Nick Weiger

I love Gert chat. Get the ciggies plant based. I'm very curious to what y'all think. I have the coconut mixed berry coconut one in my fridge right now. I've been eating it for, like, a couple weeks.

Emilia Marino

It's really good. Yes. I like the flavor of, like, the full fat greek yogurt. But I don't think about the ethical concerns of dairy as much, even though I eat a lot less meat than I used to. But that's an interesting thought to have in my head.

Mike Mitchell

Cause, yeah, I don't know. Well, I'm not trying to ruin everyone's yum. No, no, no. I don't think cow milk is produce. And then maybe you'll change your mind.

Jackie Johnson

But yes, my son will be eating macaroni and cheese. He'll have me eat some. And I was like, oh, fuck, that's good. Yeah, that's good. Oh, fuck, it can't be good.

Emma

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Emma

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Mike Mitchell

Do you remember the last time you had McDonald's? No. Because here's the thing. McDonald's is anti vegan. They have no options.

Jackie Johnson

You can't even get fries. No, the fries are in beef fat or something. Well, they used to be cooking beef towel. They actually. Now you can.

Mike Mitchell

I think they are they vegan? But they're still not classified as vegan. They have some beef additive, I believe. Fryer, I think so. They're not technically vegan.

Jackie Johnson

I'm not super, like, religious about the friar situations, I'm pretty sure. Well, then you might be good. You might be a good spot. Because I think that they change from beef tallow. Right?

Mike Mitchell

Like they used to. No, that was years ago. They changed from beef tallow to vegetable oil, and that was a cost cutting measure. But I believe they still have a beef additive in their fries for flavoring. I could be wrong about that.

Nick Weiger

That's a thing I should investigate. It's been a long time, but I'm looking right now for sure. But I will say McDonald's had the MC plant, which, oh, but not here. No, they did have a plan out here. They had it in some test markets.

Jackie Johnson

Out here. They had it a few test markets, and we had it on the podcast, everybody we had with Eric Edelstein. Oh, yeah, that's my boy now. Great, dude. And so what happened is they had that.

Nick Weiger

They went then test markets, and it seemed like it was doing well. And then McDonald's was like, we just don't want to do that. And they just doubled down on meat. They're very anti vegan. Yeah.

And we've seen this happen throughout the fast food industry where all of these, you know, the impossible whoppers were the last ones holding on. But, like, yum. Brands had, like, beyond version. Wonder how the impossible whoppers do it. I mean, we like.

I like the impossible one. Yeah, I've had one. And the Carl's junior beyond is. Okay. I've had that.

Emma

Yeah. I'm not sure if Carl's junior still has it. I should investigate that. Del Taco has beyond tacos. They discontinued.

Jackie Johnson

Oh, okay. Which is a bummer. But, yeah, we've kind of seen that industry wide where a bunch of places were trying out plant based protein, and then they were ultimately like, well, it's not worth it. Consumers just want cheap meat. Right.

Nick Weiger

But so that lands us with Mister Charlie's, which is very much attempting to be a vegan McDonald's. The full name is Mister Charlie's told me so. It is a plant based McDonald's clone. That's the name of it. Mister Charlie's told me so.

But just called Mister Charlie's clone. It sounds naughty. It does sound kind of naughty. It is a plant based McDonald's clone founded by Charlie Kim, who's the namesake, Taylor McKinnon and Aaron Haxton. It started as a pop up on La Brea Boulevard, where it still has a location in Los Angeles in 2022.

It is mostly for app based delivery. And I will say one thing in their credit is that they do make a point of hiring people who are unhoused or incarcerated. So they seem to have some good business ethics on that side of things. So they. Here's the thing.

Everything is kind of marketed in a McDonald's esque way. Like, instead of happy meals, they have frowny meals. Instead of the Big Mac, they have the big chuck for Mister Charlie's and all that sort of shit. And they call a lot of their stuff like the not a burger or the not fries. It's that sort of thing that's almost like they come off almost annoying.

Mike Mitchell

That's the thing. It has some annoying aspects to it. It's just like, this feels a little. Try hard. Do you remember the dumb Starbucks?

Emma

Yes. Yeah, the nathan for you, it's giving that, but not funny. Yeah. And that's the kind of thing where you're like, that kind of tips me against it. But then you hear then other things, like the overall concept of trying to do a plant based McDonald's.

Nick Weiger

Like, I'm in favor of. I'm in favor of, like, having more people try out plant based proteins who maybe might not have tried them because of this concept. And again, some of the stuff on the business side seems pretty positive. It's like egg slut in that way. Exactly.

Mike Mitchell

Jacob Wiseaki, he texted me and said that. That shit. Cause he heard a. We get it. You text.

Emma

God. Mitch is brought up in this 44 minutes conversation that he texts with people and gets text, and his phone blows up so many times. My thumbs are pretty strong. I don't know. Who knows?

Yeah. I text with Jacob Wysocki. Cool. He was saying that the chef from Eggslut is, like, a good chef and, like, a good guy. We talked about him on the podcast.

Nick Weiger

I mean, the branding is. Was smart for Eggslut, but a little obnoxious. I thought you had. It biases you against it. But the.

But the person behind it seems like a good guy. He had a great idea that he wanted to do with us, and I think you vetoed it. But it was very fun. Where me, you, Gabris, and one other person. You go to, like, a fast food you go to.

Mike Mitchell

Is it five drive thrus? And you order what the person in front of you had, and you have to go to, like, five different drive thrus and order what the. Like, the person in front of you ordered. Yeah, and eat. And eat everything that they ate as a group.

Emilia Marino

High five. I don't know. There was some sort of challenge. Just. Just mentally rewind about 25 minutes in the past when you were talking about getting a ct scan about what this podcast does.

Nick Weiger

Why do you want to do stunt eating? We don't. Shouldn't be doing the stunt eating. We shouldn't do stunt eating anymore. Sure.

We shouldn't do stunt eating any, but you'd go viral. That's what I'm talking about. We all need virality. We got ten years or less left on this podcast. We got to go viral with a clip or two.

Jackie Johnson

We're doing Instagram is clips of YouTube, motherfuckers. That's all I see on the. Really? Yes. It's just real boys.

The algorithm is algorithm ing, and this is probably gonna be a clip right now, so. Hi. Myself.

Mike Mitchell

Future me, scrolling away this is fucking inception. Bullshit. It is. And then you'll look at those clips and it's got like a, you know, like 5000 views. Hey, podcasts are visual now.

Jackie Johnson

Keep up, sweetie. Unfortunately true. We all got into this business to not have to look good. Exactly. We all got into this business to not do radio.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, and here we are doing radio. We got fake fucking fiddle leaf plants behind us. This is fake. This is fucking bullshit. Look at this fake ass cactus.

Emma

Oh, wow. What?

Mike Mitchell

Folks, that cactus is not fake. Plus, drafting down. Ow. That was worth it. Okay, but low key.

Jackie Johnson

That's going viral. That was funny.

Mike Mitchell

Can't believe you grabbed that cactus, dude. I had to for the virality. Oh, that was good. That was funnier than your little mukbang stunt.

I think that if you are. If we did well, you should test it. Yeah. If on our instagram, you just have me being like, oh, no, it would go. People would love that.

Jackie Johnson

People would love that shit. It's a fetish. It's. Yeah. Fucking whale would be pounding off watching that in his laptop.

Mike Mitchell

Will's gonna glaze his fucking bathtub. Spill white, spill white, spill white. Okay, so. And the frowny meals come in like a frowny in a happy meal esque package. So it's very curated to be a McDonald's experience.

Nick Weiger

No toy. No toy and no crown. No crown. As Amelia pointed out, confusing the chain with Burger King. That's.

Okay. So I'll go through everything that I got last night and then we got some more stuff today, but I got the mister muffin deluxe special, which is a plant based breakfast sausage, a plant based egg, and vegan cheese. When's the last. Do you remember the last time you've had a breakfast sandwich in general? Oh, not probably pretty freak, like, often.

Emma

Got it. Okay. Yeah, I live in Highland park. There's. Got it.

Jackie Johnson

We got breakfast sandwiches for days. And is that the sort of thing where, like, you're okay with the occasional egg in that context or. I try not to. Try not to. Yeah.

Emma

Yeah. The first thing I ate after I gave birth was the Starbucks impossible breakfast sandwich. How was it? Wow, horrible. Because I had.

Jackie Johnson

My throat got burned out from vomiting. Oh, my God. Be careful out there. Wear condoms. Yeah, it was rough.

We don't need to talk about that. Dear God. Oh, it's horrible. What a nightmare. Hug your mothers.

Hug your mothers, everybody. You throw up. Oh, well, I was having horrific acid reflux. Like the devil was in me. And so you're trying to like, push, but then in between your pushes, you're just throwing bile up.

And then I thought I was fine, but then, like, I couldn't eat for a week. It would just burn. And then I thought I permanently damaged my esophagus. But it went back when you said. The devil isn't how you.

Mike Mitchell

This wasn't sort of literal thing you're saying here, correct? No, I gave birth to the Antichrist.

We're also, again, so dumb that we're like, you throw up when you're pregnant. Idiots. No, I don't get that caught. But, I mean, like, it felt like a thing when you were giving birth, was what you were referring to. Yes.

Jackie Johnson

You throw up from pain. Wow. As well. Jeez, that's gnarly. It's really, really rough.

Emma

Yeah. Anyway, well, I had a mister buff and deluxe special. It also came with potato tots, and it came in that little package. Which potato tots? I didn't know they had tater tots.

Nick Weiger

They do have tater tots. They're whatever. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the tater tots are whatever.

The fries are whatever. I know these places feel like they have to do that, but if you're. A delicious, you're not gonna get that McDonald's hash brown. No. It's not gonna happen.

Emma

No. Well, first off, they didn't even attempt the McDonald's hash brown, which is. It's interesting, the things they omitted here. Yes. Because the whole point was we're trying to create a vibe here.

Jackie Johnson

A McDonald's vibe. Right. But they're like, no hash browns, no happy meal toys. No happy meal toys, no desserts. No treats.

Nick Weiger

No treats at all. Not like an apple pie. Not like a fake sundae or a fake cone. Someone pointed out no soda fountain, which. I think that was me.

No soda fountain. Yeah. Yeah. And you made a great point because it's like, that feels like such a McDonald's thing instead of, like, for sure. What is the McDonald's sprite, people say, has, like, its own taste or something?

I mean, their sprite is good, but their coke is the signature there. Yeah. Cause can you get any size for a dollar? It depends on the promotion, but oftentimes they do have that. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

It is funny. Cause I think younger people talk about McDonald's sprite hitting differently, as they say. Spicy sprite. What's that? I call it spicy sprite.

Emma

There it is. Spicy sprite. Spicy. Yeah. I didn't feel right when I said hitting differently.

Mike Mitchell

It just didn't feel right. It's not. It. It's hits different. Hits different.

Yes. Hitting differently is not the same thing. The McDonald's spread is hitting differently. The McDonald's coke, we've always said. Yeah.

Is just different. It's the best version of coke there is. And there is scientific proof behind it now. Yes, scientific proof. What is it?

Nick Weiger

No, it comes with, like, a metal canister. It comes in a metal canister. We've had some listeners, including our friend, which is Emilio, who works in various capacities for McDonald's. And, yes, they have, like, a. They have specific metal canisters that are delivery systems for the.

Mike Mitchell

So it makes sense that it is, like, the best. Yeah. Like a keg? Like, basically. Yeah.

Emma

I think it's a candidate. Yeah. A keg. Syrup? Yeah, syrupy ket.

Mike Mitchell

I would do a keg stand on that bad boy. I see that they have a nut. A hamburger, which is their plant based patty. Pickles, onions, ketchup and mustard, which is their attempt at a hamburger. The double knot, which is like the McDonald's supple cheeseburger, then not a chicken sandwich, which is their plant based chicken patty.

Nick Weiger

Lettuce and mayo. Again, vegan mayo. They're not chicken nuggets, which we'll talk about. And then they forgot my big chuck, which is their Big Mac cologne. But I got the big Chuck today.

Jackie Johnson

I hope you got refunded. I actually didn't ask for a refund. I guess I should probably go. Go ahead and do that. But I was just sort of like, ah, fuck it.

Nick Weiger

Whatever. That's how they get you. All right, it's fine. Just give me. How much was it?

Mike Mitchell

Just give me half of that. That's fine. Fucking bullshit. This guy. Remember the thing I got mad at a long time ago?

You didn't get the thing, and I got mad at you about it. Yeah, let's rehash that. What? What? That thing a long time ago when I didn't get the thing and he got mad at it.

Nick Weiger

We all remember. Oh, when you went in, the store was closed. Yeah. The IHOP was closed. IHOP.

They should not. It was the Denny's. Thank you, Emma. The Denny's should not have let me put in an order if it was permanent. Location was permanent.

Mike Mitchell

This guy never says a fucking word about it. Did you ever get that money back? We don't need to bring this up again. Emma. The answer is no.

Jackie Johnson

I don't wanna know. I'm in. Mitch was at. I was mad about the thing. We didn't need to let him pursue that any further.

Mike Mitchell

I got swindled earlier. This guy, he asked me for the Doughboys. Bank account. I gave it to him. I got swindled.

Oh, what the fuck? You gonna do anything about it? You fool? Don't suggest this is equivalent. I guess it's not equivalent.

I guess it's a sandwich that they forgot. Yeah, they forgot a sandwich. I didn't wanna make a big fuss about it. I'm sure I could get a refund if I went through the proposition. Who gives a shit?

Nick Weiger

I fucking will, Mitch. I'll do it. Yeah, talk about your meals. Go through the app and I'll try to get a refund right now. Wow.

Jackie Johnson

Got a fanny pack ready. I was just trying to yell at you. Cause it was fun to yell at you. No, I think you should. These companies.

Mike Mitchell

He's texting the yogurt chat. Text of the yogurt chat they have. I just don't understand how these delivery services always fuck your order up. I swear, over half the time there's. I ordered extra ranch.

Jackie Johnson

Where is it? Bitch? That is. I paid $2. Where is it?

Emilia Marino

Always comes in a bag that's taped shut, so. Right. The driver can't look in here. Yes. Make sure it's there.

So it's the restaurant. Yes. Fucking it up. Someone's asleep at the switch, and I don't appreciate it. You know what I did last night?

Mike Mitchell

I had dinner at Chi Dynasty. Do you know what I'm saying? Oh, I used to eat there all the time. And I was like, so nice to just go and sit in this. I give him credit.

Emma

Why? Because I'm actually shocked that you got delivery. Cause you're a guy who doesn't do delivery ever. Yeah. Which, you know what?

Yeah. I appreciate about you. Well, here was the thing. Like, I've been by that location. You like that a little bit more?

No. Well, I mean, I don't know. Whatever. I mean, I think, like, it's. It's good that you both still have your hair, don't you think?

Jackie Johnson

Aren't you all really blessed that your hair is still there? I mean, this is. I got a lot of fun. Do you want me to tell you something? Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

I'm going in for another treatment tomorrow. They take my blood. Yeah. They spin it down. You're doing a PRP, and I guess that's what.

And then they stab my head with it. Yeah. Look at this beauty queen over here. You know, I'm, like, not even shamed or embarrassed. Yeah.

Cause I think a lot of people wouldn't want to talk about it. But I don't care, really. I got wonderful. Someone shames you for that. You shame them right back.

Nick Weiger

Falling on top. I'm not sure how visible this is. Because it's been getting fat here. It looks like your hair looks luscious. Looks like you're about to open up your head.

Little men in black alien inside. Hey, buddy.

How do I report this? Because I just see the receipt here. Don't do it. Don't do it. I was just giving you a hard time.

Jackie Johnson

Go to your order. I know, because they screw my order up all the time. I got my order up. There's, like, a dispute or, like, a problem with. Or help with an order.

Nick Weiger

Passed order. Now we're just giving you the money. Back without any time. They're just like, yep. Whoops.

Emilia Marino

Here you go. Well, it also just shows how much I mean, wrong or. This is actually a crazy thing to talk about, is that Amelia picked up the order today. Yeah. And this is just shows you how these apps are horrible, and I use them all the time, and they are horrible.

Mike Mitchell

But the difference between her picking up the order and us getting it delivered was $50 wise. And, you know, the driver ain't getting. Those fees, and the driver is not getting the $50. No, 50 fucking dollars. Which is so crazy.

But don't do this. I was just giving you a hard time. I don't care about this. My argument. I feel like the more people who dispute, the restaurant will start to notice, and maybe they'll.

Or postmates will start to fucking. Yeah. That's why I want to do it. I'm normally not a snitch. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

You know. No, I don't want to get someone in trouble, is the thing. Not the driver's fault? Yeah, it's not the driver's fault. The restaurant.

Clearly someone's not. Well, I think that so many of these companies are predatory in that way of, like, they want. They just are like, oh, we'll get lost and we'll make profits, and who cares, right? And I think that that's, like, what they plan on doing. We have received your message.

Nick Weiger

We'll be in touch as soon as possible. I didn't want you to do it. Can you open a chat and be. Like, do you know who I am? Hamburger emoji.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, I met you in a gym once.

Emma

You. I also did text the Gert chat.

Jackie Johnson

Y'all should go to menchies. We should go to menchies. That'd be a fun hour. He did. He just texted.

Mike Mitchell

What up, chat. So, wait, those two are probably like, what the fuck's going on? What are you saying about Chai dynasty? I was just saying it was so nice to go and sit down in the restaurant. It was great.

Jackie Johnson

What'd you get? I got the sesame chicken, which is what I used to get, which is an old favorite. Yeah. Oh, it was so good. It was.

Mike Mitchell

It was. It's. It is. It is good. And also, I was just like, you know, gotta clean up.

This is great. Yeah. Walk out of here. Feel great. It was great.

Nick Weiger

Going to restaurants is fun. Oh, yeah. It's a. But I'm curious. Wait, dude, while we're on this topic, because if we're talking about, like, you know, Qi dynasty is chinese food, we're talking about chinese food, Thai food.

You know, these are cuisines where I feel like you can get, like, tofu and you can get a vegan version of something, and you can get a very close to what you had with me. Yes. I don't think Qi dynasty does tofu, though. At least they did it back in the day when I would go, I don't know. I'm not sure.

Jackie Johnson

They're not a tofu y place, but I used to eat there in, like, 2009, 2008, when I still ate meat, and I would get that dish, chinese food. Great. I mean, I got some. I got. The other thing I got was vegetable mushu, so.

Oh, there you go. Those little mushrooms. Oh, yeah. Wow. It was good.

I used to live in that neighborhood. I never left. I'm still over there. I'll probably die there. We got to talk about the food.

Nick Weiger

So, Mitch, talk us through your order. You got one of the combo meals. I got the. What is it? The big Carl.

Emma

Big Chuck. Big Chuck. Big Carl is Carl's junior. Well, I knew that, too. I guess you're right.

Mike Mitchell

I shouldn't have guessed it was a big Carl. No, I get Mister Charlie's. It's Charlie. Kind of like Carl, but is the big Chuck like their big Mac? My initial thought when I bit into the suss and I were like, this place stinks.

And look, I'll say it. Yeah. Did we mention Susser just showed up? Susser did just show up, and I think that he was. He didn't order food.

I think he's expecting there to be more food. And then it was kind of like you needed to kind of put your order in a little bit and didn't do that. Right. And so we kind of just sitting there kind of sad. And then he said he was just.

Emilia Marino

At sweetgreen, and he was like, oh, I forgot you guys were here today. So I thought I'd stop by. Oh. Hmm. Then he accidentally at sweet green and he accidentally knocked a poster off the wall.

Emma

Yeah, he did. I was gonna say he was. He also knocked a poster off the wall and then left. Yeah, but he. And also did eat a couple nuggets, I believe.

Yeah. Yeah. He got what he wanted. So did Jemmy. Yeah, Jemmy got some nuggies.

Mike Mitchell

Good girl. She loved them. My thought was like, I love McDonald's. Of course, we think it's one of the best. And Jemmy loves McDonald's as well.

Emilia Marino

She loves nuggies. And I didn't want to like this place there. They had a beef with. Dang. It's Wayne and Luke Foods.

Mike Mitchell

The two. I just spit everywhere. The two guys. I. Sorry.

The two guys that I. That I follow on Instagram who look might be annoying. I don't know what the deal is with them. Luke. Food sky talks like that.

I talked about him before and they both reviewed Miss Charles. They don't like it.

I was like, maybe this place sucks. Cause they were kinda mean to them in the comments. Mister Charlie's was mean to him. Yeah. I was like, maybe this place kinda sucks.

You then texted last night and said, I got news for you. Mister Charlie's is good. Yeah. Whoa. And I said, interesting.

Jackie Johnson

You've been having a poker face all day. I did not know how you felt. And then I come in, how I live. I take a bite. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

You can't tell what the fuck he's thinking. How have you been dealing with this for ten years? Not easy. I come in, I open up the big Chuck. Yeah.

I take a bite of it. It's really, really close to a Big Mac. It tastes really an impressive. Pretty impressive food. Science y.

That was the most impressive thing I had, was the big Chuck. And to be clear, I got another big Chuck. I added that onto our order today because I didn't get it last night. And I tried it. I was quite impressed by it.

It was impressive. It. The. The. They.

They really nailed the. Just the sauce works really well on there. The cheese is. I hate to say this, cuz it's disgusting. Yeah.

Almost. When you touch it, it's almost boogery. Okay. Gross. Gelatinous.

I guess there were less gross words. McDonald's cheese kind of like that, though. It is a little bit. It's very plasticky. Plastic.

But this is like, so like, sticky. Different texture. It's a different. It's. It's.

It's. It's different. Yeah. Eating it, I think. I think when it was singled out was the taste that I liked the least when it was singled out.

But in, as a whole, in the. In the big chuck, it tasted good. And the Big Mac sauce that they have. Well, their version of the Big Mac sauce they have is good. Yeah, I was.

I was surprised by it where, like, I think that if. I think you could fool some people into thinking that was a big Mac. On that note, Natalie loved the double cheeseburger, the double knot. She was like, this item is a five fork item. This is like a double cheeseburger.

Nick Weiger

Like, just a pretty perfect double cheeseburger clone. I could just have this instead of McDonald's cheeseburger. The rest of the menu, she was a little less impressed by and was more in the, you know, the two fork range. But I will say that the big chuck was one of the better things I had. I also really like their fake hamburger without Mitch, the cheese.

Because the issue with the cheese is that it's ooey gooey. And you know what's fun? If with regular cheese, you got some on the wrapper, you have a little extra. You peel it off, you have a little extra bite of cheese. Not the same sensation here.

You actually don't want that, because tasting it on its own, it more exposes the lie of it on its own. Is the thing I liked the least for sure. I had a single cheeseburger as well, and I ate most of that. And at the first bite, I was like, mmm. They got it right with the Big Mac, but this one isn't right.

Mike Mitchell

And then I took a couple more bites, and I was like, wait, this is. This does taste like a cheeseburger from McDonald's. And then I would get, like, a pocket of the cheese that was gooed up, and I'd be like, oh, no, this is. It was like a very up and down thing. But I.

That's what I was impressed by this place in many ways. It's crazy. Totally. And just to finish my thought, that's why maybe if you have an issue with the vegan cheeses. And I usually like a vegan cheese, but some people don't love it, but I'd push it towards the hamburger, because I think that that one tastes.

Nick Weiger

Just tastes like a McDonald's hamburger. It's a little bit of a dry guy, but you dip that in some chuck sauce or some ketchup, it's not, you know, you're just. You're sitting. Sure. I thought.

I thought that was a pretty impressive concoction. Like the. Like the breakfast sandwich. Tasted like a chicken sausage, but for the most part, tasted like an actual breakfast sandwich, not a chicken sandwich, was pretty good. I actually thought that was more successful than the nuggets, just because the nuggets, eating them on their own, you know, you kind of have a little bit less to hide them.

Mike Mitchell

The nuggets aren't bad. They were still good when I dipped the nuggets. And you know what I asked, because you were like, you don't have to get the sweet and sour and barbecue sauce. And I said to Emilia, just get it anyways. I want to try it.

And when I did dip it in the sweetness, and I was happy she did, because when I dipped it in the sweet and sour sauce, I was like, oh, this, like, is giving some sort of equivalent to what a chicken nugget is. I just think it's a tougher thing when it's the protein on its own. Yes. You can't, like, hide it with some of the condiments and stuff like that. Dinking it.

Dumping it in the. Dinking it. Dinking. Dinking the nugs. Dumping you were looking for.

Nick Weiger

That's the word you wanted. Dinking the nub. Yeah, dinking the nubs. Wow. Ugh.

Emma

God. That cold shower did not turn on his brain. I'm gonna dink my nub. Oh, he spilled white.

Mike Mitchell

Dinking the nugs. Yeah. When you dunk them in that sweet and sour, it helps. It makes it. But, like, on its own, you know what?

It's close. They get the crisp, right, but it is just. You can tell. You can tell the difference, obviously. Let me just say.

But the Big Mac is, like, a thing where I was like, I don't know. I can't. This is so close that I think you'd fool people. That was a magic trick. I was very impressed by the big check.

Nick Weiger

The reason the barbecue sauce and the sweet and sour, I was like, we don't necessarily need to get them is cause I got them last night, and they're. It's just sweet baby raised barbecue sauce sauce, and Heinz sweet and sour. They're just prepackaged sauces. But that said, if you want the experience of having those, you know that. But they do have a bunch of different house sauces as well.

Their green sauce, their white sauce, chipotle aioli, their big chuck sauce, which I mentioned, and their ju dip, which is a combo of the barbecue and chipotle. But let's talk about the white sauce a little bit. Cause, Jackie, you were a defender of the white sauce. Yes. Okay.

Jackie Johnson

I'm gonna pull up what I ordered. Please do. By the way, we need to trim your eyebrows, Mitch. I would love that if I had some. I should have brought my kit.

Cause I like the shape, but they're getting a little. The hairs are starting to go down in your eyes. You know what? I've had some vision problems, and I think a part of it has been that I'm seeing hairs. Can it happen with eyelashes, too?

Mike Mitchell

I have tiny eyes. Well, you have inset. It's called inset eyes. Oh, boy. And it's being hooded eyes.

I've heard this before. Other women. My mom has told me that I'm gonna have to get an operation at some point to. If I like. She's like an eye lift or something.

She said that I'll probably have to get an eye lift? Yeah. Wow. Really? She says that?

Yeah, she says that I have. That I would. I. We want to make sure you can see. That's exactly like.

She's like, as you get older, it's gonna be harder for me to see. Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah. I would love for you to trim my eyebrows. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

I just. I like a full brow. Yeah. But they're getting a little. Look, I need.

Mike Mitchell

I need a little bit of a. I need a little bit of a cleanup anyways. I mean, I'm due for a cleanup. Doesn't help that my hot water is not working right now, but. Do you do any brow maintenance?

Nick Weiger

I do a very small amount. My barber will sometimes just clip him a little bit. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I wanna brush him up and then do a cut, cut, cut.

Jackie Johnson

Just get those. How does this look? Yeah, there we go. I feel like that'd be very satisfying to watch. Somebody's angry.

Mike Mitchell

That works. I am angry. You know, like Maggie Simpson's arch nemesis. Yeah. That's what you're giving the baby with the unibrow.

Yeah, the big one. Big, yeah. They're really curly, too. Yeah, they're like cur. You have, like, curly hair in your eyebrows.

I was a curly haired boy when I was a little kid. I had little blonde curls. Wise. Wow. Yeah, my son has curly blonde hair.

Jackie Johnson

Is he gonna end up with curly eyebrows like me? I pray no. Don't anger the baby gods. But I think that he should be. He should be better looking.

Who knows? But they do. You do lose your. A lot of people lose their blond hair. I was a little.

Nick Weiger

I was a little toe headed boy. I was a toe headed boy as well. Wise. Our innocence is stripped from us. Ew.

Jackie Johnson

Anyway, back to vegan. Hamburgers. That's right. I ordered a frowny meal with a. Not a cheeseburger and a side of the white sauce.

Now, when I go on SiriusXm, and I do Howard Stern, that studio is right next to. Yes, I just dropped that. It's right next to McTra. So I go there every time I'm as serious. Right.

Which is, you know, often. Yeah. So, by the way, you can hear me on Howard Stern 101 sometimes. Anyway, so I go there. I make it a point to go there.

Emma

Yeah. Because it's a treat for me. So my hamburger. I got the cheeseburger, the single patty cheeseburger. It's been a while since I had a McDonald's hamburger, but I grew up in the nineties in Texas.

Jackie Johnson

I ate McDonald's every week of my life, and that taste will never die. I know exactly like, it takes me right there. So I bit into that cheeseburger. And for me, a person who hasn't had real McDonald's in a long time, it is. It is a McDonald's hamburger.

It tastes exactly like it to me. And it's not necessarily like the patty. It's the condiment choices. So they chop the onions just like they do on a McDonald's. They have a mustard and the ketchup and the cheese.

It's just the exact combination of all those things in your mouth. It is, to me, exactly like a McDonald's single cheeseburger. I think, for. For us. I mean, if you're vegan or vegetarian and you're not eating McDonald's, I think this is like.

Emma

Yes. And you wanted that experience. It gives it to you. I wonder how you would feel about this. The thing that it didn't feel as close to.

Mike Mitchell

To me is the fries, and I think it is just impossible. Please stop, like, coming into my. What I'm saying right now, because this is actually my time. The fries. I think the fries go on.

Jackie Johnson

I'm speaking. I'm speaking. Does that work? I got. He's out.

He's out. As I was saying, mutely nodding, the. Next thing I chose to eat were the chicken nuggets. Once again, to me, they taste just like the McDonald's chicken nuggets. The texture was very similar.

The. The outside. What's it called? The. You can talk now.

What's the called? Like, the outside. The breading. The breading. Yeah.

My brain doesn't work either. I have a kid. It breaks your life. That is very similar. Now the white sauce.

So there's three sauces. I want to talk now you want. To talk about the white sauce? I think you liking the white sauce is possibly insane. Really?

Nick Weiger

I'm baffled by the white sauce. Natalie and I both thought it tasted like cream cheese icing. We're like, this is so pungently sweet that it's unpleasant. Yeah. I don't know what's in it.

Yeah. And we couldn't find any info on. The website, but I love it. Did you love it? Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

So the first time I heard about McCharlies was Lizzo. Yes. Lizzo made a video on TikTok eating it, and she tried the sauces, and she said, the white sauce is the way to go. So the first time I went, I ordered the white sauce, and I think I got a green as well, and I tried it, and I just. When I was little, I would always get the happy meal chicken nuggets with honey.

Dipping those chicken nuggets in that honey, mommy, that was my shit. Is that what it's supposed to evoke? So I'm supposed to be a shit, but all I know is that when you dip them nugs in the white ooee ooey, it do it for mommy. Wow. So maybe it's that mommy, like, a little sweet sweet on her nugs.

Mike Mitchell

I. You know what? I get that. And I was a. I was a.

I was a honey on nugget. Yeah. Yeah. Lizzo is the singer, right? Yes.

Because I have a friend named Dano, and I didn't know if you maybe had a friend named Lizzo. I'm just casually dropping my friend Lizzo.

Jackie Johnson

Hey, weirder things have happened. He's from Texas, like me. I got a question. I got in Koala. Yeah, that's right.

Nick Weiger

Kowalik. Our former Beyonce's date. Our former commissioner and Beyonce's date. Commissioner for a very short time. Not a great tenure.

Kind of a William Henry Harrison of the doughboys commissionership. Yeah, it was horrible. Wow. Cause I got a question for you. When did you lose it?

Mike Mitchell

When did you lose the blonde hair? When did you lose. I think probably 6th to 7th. How does it happen? Does it slowly fall out and dark hair comes into its place?

Jackie Johnson

Or is it sort of like rogue from X Men? You just wake up one day with. Like, the streak it starts to for me? Same thing, like, six or seven great heads. I see photos of y'all as towheads.

Mike Mitchell

I'll find one right now. Okay. I don't have any old photos on my phone, but Jesus Christ, why? I don't know. I just want to hold on to stuff.

Jackie Johnson

Look, at my little blonde child. Adorable. Let me get a look at that. What a cutie. Blonde.

Emma

True cutie. Oh, my goodness. Blonde as hell. Yeah, very much so. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

I'm gonna find a picture of myself. You don't get to see. I'm not a mommy blogger. No, thank you, permission. I've been trying to look up what the white sauce is, and I just.

Nick Weiger

They don't have the. It's just called mystery white sauce. And they don't have the nutrition info on the website. So this is an argument my husband always makes for vegan food. We'll go out to eat.

Jackie Johnson

We'll get, like, vegan sandwiches. And he'll go, what is this? And I'll go, I don't know. And he's like, don't you feel weird that you don't know what you're eating? Right?

And I'm always like, I guess not. But I don't have allergies. But obviously a lot of people have, like, gluten or soy and different things. Yeah, sure. But I don't.

But that is like, a thing about vegans is we're like, we don't care what it is. As long as that ain't me. I'll eat the cardboard. Whatever. Stop.

Nick Weiger

Look how cute he is. Never in my life think that was you. That's me. Keep that little guy. Keep it out of your spank bank.

All right. Jesus Christ. Now I just fall.

Jackie Johnson

What was I made for that shit? I should do a TikTok of that. What was then me at the end? Just sad as myself.

No, you know what you need to do? There's a TikTok trend with I'm just a kid. That song from simple plan. Oh, yeah. And you come into frame, and then you click to the current photo.

Nick Weiger

Do that, you'd be like, what the fuck are you? Got me going through my phone again. Let me see if I have anything. I don't think I do. This is riveting radio.

Mike Mitchell

You don't got one? Come on. Wait, no, but this is on the edge of me turning from blonde to brown, so you actually get to kind of get kind of like a Santa Claus. Tim Allen midpoint sort of transition. This is me with my bass clarinet and turtleneck sweater in 6th grade.

Nick Weiger

So there you go. Oh, you're adorable. Yeah, it's a little heartbreaker. You must love that edging. Edging from flond to brown.

Jackie Johnson

Were you first chairman? Yeah, it was first chair. Oh, yeah. Kidding me. Hope it was a fucking strong chair.

Mike Mitchell

I'm gonna find a. I'm gonna find a couple. Here's another one of me. Stop. Yeah, we've seen this one before.

Emma

Wow. You're Adam. I was playing Adam. Yeah. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

Was there an Eve or. No, the costume doesn't really work. That's what I got. Yeah, you've got just a little. For our audio listeners, you've got a leaf covering your genitals and your otherwise nude.

Nick Weiger

You just zoomed in on the leaf. This is. I foresee this being. This is gonna be my lock screen. Yeah.

This is gonna be a most replayed section of the YouTube video. Unfortunately, you asked if there was an Eve. Oh, my God. I maybe was playing Eve. I can't really tell there with.

Mike Mitchell

When I zoom in on the genitals. You know when you, like, rent fast times and taking the top off, it's all gleaming.

Emma

There. I'm a Nintendo power sweatshirt. Oh, that's a cool sweatshirt. You're blonde as hell. I was blonde as hell.

Nick Weiger

How do you have all these photos? What are you in my house? This sweatshirt is elite. I wish you still had that. It was a good sweatshirt.

Emma

Yeah, yeah. It's cool sweatshirt. My mom probably tossed it. Fucking bitch. There's Nintendo power, and it's got Mario on it.

Jackie Johnson

You know, it would be a sick look. The. The super Nintendo sweatshirt with the. With the Adam Bush together. I love my mom very much, by the way.

Nick Weiger

Great mom. Great mom. I have your same Mitch ornament. You know the Mitch ornament? It's on my tree every year.

Emma

Wow. Yeah. Tim Sicardo will always send me a pic of the. Of the Mitch ornament that warms. My mom has it too.

I know. I think I saw, like, she does screen. She keeps it at. She keeps it next to her tv year round. I have my Mitch t shirt still.

Wow. And I've wore. I wear it all the time. I've had two husbands have to stare at that t shirt. And, like, my second husband, he doesn't.

Jackie Johnson

Like, I don't think he knew about what's going on with Mike Mitchell. Like, he did. He was like, why do you have that shirt? And I'm like, shut up. Like, I don't need to explain this to you because it was like, merch from your show.

You had to be in the audience that night to get the shirt. To get the shirt. Yeah. Which you also were in the show. Oh, I saw Kathryn Burns yesterday.

She says hi, by the way. Oh, wow. Love, Catherine Burns, because we were in your show together. Yes. Yeah.

And she's won two emmys and was, like, killing it. Very, very accomplished. I got the news alert about the Sims movie, and I was like, kathryn, please. Corey got the Sims movie. Please.

She's a choreographer. She choreographed a video. I did a funny or die video Gungan style back in the day. And she also appeared in it. She was Princess Leia.

Emma

Yeah. Which I was just watching at the. At the other day. And she's. She in the video at the end with duts, too.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Funny enough, I was just watching her new reel, and that didn't make the cut. Weird. I'll just send her a message. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

There was, like, all these big celebrities in there, all these prestigious projects. You know, she did the Borat movie, all these things. Right, right. You didn't make the cut. Yeah.

Nick Weiger

She probably, like, thought it would be weird to ask or something, but I'm fine with it. Like, she can totally do. She's won a couple of emmys. We won our I heart radios best food podcast. You want an I heart award?

Emma

Yes. Naturally. Won as well last year. Yeah, so, I mean, emmys are cool. Fashion pod.

Jackie Johnson

Did y'all get an award? I have a trophy. Never sent me one. Wait, really? No.

And I'm like, who's dick? Do I have to suck get my I heart award.

Hello, mister I heart. Are you listening? Do I have to suck the lost culturistas dick or something? Like, how do I get my damn award? Somebody called me.

I was really upset. I'm pretty sure when I asked where the iHeartRadio award should be shipped. When we got it, someone texted back and said, the dumpster. I said, city dump. There it is.

Emma

Wow. I said city dump. Wow. I respected the. Thank you for the award.

Nick Weiger

That's nice. He's gonna make you cut that out, aren't you? No, I don't care. Really? Yeah, we said it on the podcast before.

Jackie Johnson

I'll dig it out of the trash and put it on my shelf. Cause I want my damn award. You should get it. How ungrateful. I took that trophy.

Emma

Yeah. And it's now in my house that I'm decluttering because I save everything. I don't know who these people are. I don't know what the voting parameters were, but sure, I'll take an award. Why not?

Jackie Johnson

There you go. That's a nice attitude. Yeah. What a speech. The fries were not good.

Nick Weiger

The fries were not good. So this is an issue. And these places feel like they. These are delivery concepts. And yes, I know that they have a physical store, but the physical store does not even have any interior seating?

Emma

No. It is like a Papa John's. It is a pickup location. This place is a. These delivery focused concepts feel like they have to have fries because that's the expectation.

Nick Weiger

But the fries are never good. No, I feel like, like, figure something else out. Have, like a really good potato salad or something. Have a great vegan potato salad. I don't know.

I don't fucking know. I'm with you. That's just a first pitch. It could be whatever. We didn't like the first pitch.

Jackie Johnson

Y'all don't have zoom on these cameras, right?

Emma

All right. You're making a face. Like, maybe potato salad isn't a solution. I want a hamburger. You know what would be good with that?

Mike Mitchell

A potato salad. That's a fine cookout combo. Here, zoom in here. I couldn't really do the face as well. The eyebrows, though.

Nick Weiger

Potato salad, Mac salad, coleslaw. These are classic sides you could have with tots. Not better. Cause I feel, like, pulled up more. They were a little better.

But also, I'm just like, none of it travels. All that fried stuff all gets soggy. You gotta pop them in the air fryer. Yeah. Does this place have an air fryer?

Jackie Johnson

Y'all got cold brew on tap, you'd. Think we should get an air fryer. Head gum could have an air fryer. That would be fine. That would help.

Mike Mitchell

But even tell anya. She'll be thrilled to hear another fucking request from you. Want me to text her? No, but even if the fries weren't cold for delivery, they still weren't giving McDonald's. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

Has anyone, y'all tell me, you're the experts. Has any restaurant got the fries on lock? Like McDonald's? No. Like, why?

What is it? Is it that beef tallow? Is that what gives them that flavor? Is it the cut? Is it the salt?

What is it? So we were talking this. Cause we were trying to see if the fries were still. If the fries were vegan. They're not in America.

Emilia Marino

In other countries, a lot of places they are, but in America they are not. They use beef stock, it looks like. And so. So they are not vegan. You can't have them.

Mike Mitchell

They're not vegetarian even. Yeah, but they used to be cooked with beef tallow back in the day. Is that like, inside of bones? What's tallow? It's beef tallow is like beef fat.

Emilia Marino

So they fried them in beef fat. Okay, yeah. Yeah. I didn't know. So humpy Emma came in with that answer.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, I thought I would like you. I thought that was what it was. Marrow. Marrow. It's more like lard.

Emma

What? Lard is from a pig. Tallow is from. And now it is vegetable oil, but they also use beef stock. Is that what it is?

Mike Mitchell

I guess, in the. In the fries. So it's not in what they're fried in anymore, but they put beef into the fries so that they have a similar flavor to when they were fried. When they got it. Yeah.

I mean, they. It works pretty well still. They're still great. Yeah. I don't remember what they tasted like before that changed anymore, but I'm sure that they were great.

Better, maybe. I don't know. I think that was, honestly, Mitch, before either of us would have remembered it because they made that beef tallow switch in the eighties. Like, maybe even in the seventies. I'll look at it.

Nick Weiger

Oh, is that recent? Yeah. Then maybe we do. Y'all were both little blonde boys sucking on your beef tallow fries.

Mike Mitchell

He'd made a change at that point. 1990, this guy changed. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You switched over.

You switched over. The great change occurred. No, I think it was. I still would have been blonde into the early nineties. That's still a little bit blonde in middle school.

Emma

Yeah. There you go, buddy. I changed over. Yeah. 1994 and five, six.

Mike Mitchell

Somewhere in there. Yeah. The times were changing too, so for me it was. Yeah. Berlin walls coming down, soviet unions collapsing, highway.

Nick Weiger

Jay's out there driving around. The job market was great, though. Job market was great. Clinton, right? Clinton online.

Mike Mitchell

We're signing on for the first time. You got mail. I remember that. I remember that. We had 1800.

Jackie Johnson

Be a geek, right? Yes, I do remember. We were not an AOL house. Wow. I never had an AOL.

Mike Mitchell

You never had AOL? Well, I had aim, obviously, of course, but I never had, like, Jackie and AOL. Yeah. We've known each other long enough that maybe I knew your aim. Isn't that fucking.

Emma

Whoa. Isn't that horrifying? I think I've told the story of the podcast before, but do you remember ICQ, which was adjacent around the same time as aim? It was a similar chat program. So ICQ, I was chatting with a girl when I was younger, and I told her I was 17, whatever.

Nick Weiger

One of those things where it's someone you just know from online. And she reached a certain point and she was like, can you send a picture? And I, like, this was pre, you know, it was like, ready availability of digital cameras. Not like you had people had like, a fucking smartphone where you could just take a selfie on the fly. You had to had a picture of yourself uploaded on the computer.

Jackie Johnson

Yeah, I did. Yeah. Yeah. So I didn't have one. So I instead sent her a pic of my dad, and I said, this is my.

Nick Weiger

I look like this, but, like, 30 years younger. I said that. Did you get blocked? She was like, you don't look 17. And then she stopped talking to me.

Emma

I explained it. I thought I explained it pretty clearly. Opposite. It's usually like a grown man pretending to be 13. Right?

Nick Weiger

Right, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah. Now he sends a picture. He says I look like this, but 30 years old.

Mike Mitchell

The blonde hair guy. That is very funny. Why? Early Internet era. I remember G chatting.

G chatting. Oh, yeah. I remember, like, Alex Ferny and I would G chat. Yeah, yeah. He was a big G chat.

Icq. Was this, like, before four chan or something like that? It would have predated four chan. I know you're making a joke, but I. It sounds like you're saying.

Nick Weiger

That's what you're saying, but, yeah, it does predate it, I think. All right, well, thank you for giving me the real answer, you asshole. I was trying to say you're a QAnon guy. You turned it on me. That's okay.

Mike Mitchell

That's very funny. Yeah. Poor girl. Actually, I'm sure everything worked out. I used to always, for the better, for the better.

Jackie Johnson

I would always cyber and, like, send, like, pictures, and, like, I was all into that. Wow. Wow, really? Yeah, and I'd lie. I'd be like, I'm, you know, 17, female, Texas.

And I was really, like, twelve. Oh, damn. Wow. And then my dad was like, you could be talking to, like, the guy across the street. You don't even know.

And then I was like, but I'm lying, too. And then I got really weirded out. Cause I was like, we both don't know who we're talking to. Yeah, it's true. The nineties were crazy.

Mike Mitchell

It's true. It's very true. Wild west out there. It's true. I'm not gonna touch it.

Jackie Johnson

I don't touch it. But I love those yahoo chat rooms. Oh, my God, I love them. They were so fun. Yeah, I'm tour.

Mike Mitchell

I'm too afraid to. I'm too bad. I think I'll just leave it. Leave it there. Don't touch it.

Dan Schneider. That's all I was. That's what I was gonna say. I haven't watched that yet. I watched it.

Jackie Johnson

Yeah. I gotta watch this thing. We'll put it on your list. Well, I gotta watch when I finish it. I'm saying you're gonna put on the list.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, I'm excited. I love a doc. I'm into docs. I think docs have gotten too long. They've gotten too long.

Jackie Johnson

And they've also. They stretch them out so much, I'm like, this could have been a commercial. Exactly. Yeah. That Netflix is really milking it.

Emma

Give me the. Give me the 90 minutes, doc, self contained thing. I don't need the six part mini series. But I know the economics of it. That people expect six parter.

Mike Mitchell

I can't tell. I watched that documentary and you told me the craziest Dan Schneider story. That's not in that story. Oh, it's not in the doc. It's not in the dock.

That's funny, but it's insane. We'll tell you afterwards. Were you a child actor? No. With that blonde hair and that oboe.

Nick Weiger

Could have been the bass clarinet. Bass clarinet. I'm sorry. I did play the bassoon, which was a different double read, but I never played the oboe. I mean, I could have played the oboe.

I'm sure. Sure. You think you could still play right now if we got one out? Yeah, I could. Wow.

We were talking about this, Mitch, and this was a weird thing. This is a thing you engineered. It was a fun surprise. Yes. You brought up someone.

We were doing a live show in Denver and you brought up a fan on stage. That's right. With a bassoon. An instrument I had not touched in 20 years. But I was in California all state orchestra as a high school senior.

Emma

Yes. And so I was a very accomplished amateur bassoonist. And I was able to play. I was able to wail on that thing. I could play that thing.

Mike Mitchell

I think I asked you to play the Simpsons afterwards too. Didn't you play that? Or I played Kevin's country, which is the closing J. Lo tonight show.

Nick Weiger

Take us away, Kevin.

Mike Mitchell

He did a pretty. Oh, I gotta say, you knocked out. You're up there, even in that high altitude. Oh, yeah, up there in that high altitude. He's.

He's. He's blown into this hobo. Well, that's not how I hold it, but, yeah, keep going. He's blown into. This bad boy also is a bassoon.

Bassoon. He's blown into this bassoon. His spit park is going everywhere. It's the day that the NBA shut down the season because of COVID That's. Where I was gonna say, that's what it's gonna land on.

Nick Weiger

And that's what it was zero. We did this whole thing. They brought up a stranger's wind instrument. And I put your mouth open. He did bring a fresh read for you.

He didn't bring a fresh read, which was a nice precaution. Audience fucking, you know, crammed into a room this size. All thankfully. Then we did a meet and greet. Then we did a meet and greeted.

Jackie Johnson

Licking, y'all. And this is the day before, like, everything shut. Yeah. Like, the next day we flew back, canceled the rest of the trip. Did y'all get COVID?

Nick Weiger

I did not get COVID in that first block. That's good. But I ultimately did get it. I got yelled at by a lady in the airport for wearing an n 95 mask. A lady who was a nurse.

Emma

Wow. She was like. She was like, those are my masks. No, she was like, those don't do anything for you. Wow.

Mike Mitchell

Nurse. That's what she said. Yikes. Well, we didn't know anything back then. You know, anything back then.

Jackie Johnson

Wow. The before time Dan Schneider was on. Tour with us at that point. He was great. He was really good.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, he was awesome. Is that slime? Does the singer of the B 52s, Stan Schneider? No. Very different man.

Nick Weiger

Nothing, I don't think problematic about Fred Schneider. Oh, Fred Schneider. Fred Schneider. Yeah. We should get to our final.

Mike Mitchell

Hi. As I did a little impression, I. Guess it'd been Fred Snyder. Take it away, Kevin.

I like that your impression of Leno is then turns into impression of Kevin doing the song. That's episodes would end. Yeah. Hey, I was. I watched a lot of.

Jackie Johnson

I was a Leno head. I was. I was. I mean, Letterman, I think. I think that was great.

Nick Weiger

That was good. Letterman is the funnier man. I just. I liked Conan, so I always had Leno on to watch Conan. Conan, which I know Leno is the less cool one.

Emma

Yeah. I mean, this is thing. It was always. I'd like, whatever. It's good that there were two different shows for two different audiences.

Nick Weiger

I was always more of a Letterman guy. Always more of a Conan guy. I like Leno. Yeah. People were too hard on Leno.

A lot of it was because of the Conan fallout, but still, people were too hard on Leno. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

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Nick Weiger

All right, we should get to our final thoughts on Mister Charlie's. So, Jackie Jackster, you've done the show before. We're gonna each go around. Yes. Every three years.

We'll get you back sooner. We're gonna get you back sooner. Would you ever do a double? What is that? That's like the Patreon watch.

Jackie Johnson

Oh, yeah, of course. Really? Shout out to the Patreon people. Wow. Okay.

I have a patreon myself. Shout out your paper. I just want to say right here. Yeah. We could just do a Mitch glam glam over.

Oh, my God. But we have to film it. Of course. I could get those. Those nose strips back out.

Remember how disgusting your nose strip was? Yeah. I don't think I've ever seen a more disgusting nose in my life. And that was before video that was just for us. We.

Mike Mitchell

I would. We could do a Mitch glam overwatch. Oh, man. Look at this guy's toothbrush. I know.

Jackie Johnson

They're gorgeous. Thank you. I swear to God, I want to hear about this. Well, I've been getting gel peddies. I've been treating myself.

Nick Weiger

I don't know if this is on camera. No, it's on camera. But I specifically wore an open toed shoe today. This is two weeks old. So, you know, it's a little bit scuffed up, but thank you.

I specifically wore this today because of you. Cause I was like, oh, we got the jackster from Natchez Butte here. I gotta impress her with my tootsies. What made you choose this purple? It's a Lakers playoff run.

Although they're probably already eliminated by now. So when you go in there, you have no hesitation to be like, give me a gel colored. No, I. Eddie. Okay.

Jackie Johnson

I love that about you, honey. Toxic masculinity. Who. Yeah. And I like it with the toes.

Nick Weiger

Cause, you know. Yeah. When you need to be corporate and pulled together, put a sock on. Exactly 100%. That's you, King.

Emma

Yeah. What about you, Mitch? What about your toes? Should I take mine out for a second? I don't know.

Mike Mitchell

I don't know if I should. I mean, mine are not good. We can make a pedicure part of the glam up. I love it. Oh, my God.

Jackie Johnson

Let's do it. We get some people in here to. We could get people in here to give us manicures and pedicures as we're. As we're. As we're recording.

Mike Mitchell

I'm just saying we could. The possibilities are endless. Honestly, I love all this. No, I want to. It could happen.

Jackie Johnson

I want to do, like, some. I have some patches I need to stick on that face. And we need to do the brows. You need a lot of them. I'm down.

Remember we put the face mask on it? I do. It was tiny. Yes. Remember it was just like this little hat in the middle.

Emilia Marino

Do they make extra large sheet mats? I'll look. I'll do my research. It was like putting a silver dollar pancake in the middle of a plate, which is like. It was exactly that.

Jackie Johnson

And you said he looked like Cummy Santa. I do. I did the like. Yeah, Santa cum. Yeah, that was your old apartment.

Mike Mitchell

The old apartment, gone. Now it's gone. That's the one where you got. You got pranked, right? That's where I got pranked.

Emma

Okay. Ben, my second husband, and I watched that the other night. It's so hard to find. You know, that's like, we talked about. This, where every dying, laughing when we thought everything would live on the Internet forever.

Mike Mitchell

And it turned out to not be the case at all. Really. A lot of work just lost. More so than even early tv stuff. Because everything.

Everything like that was on tapes and the Internet stuff, they just fucking wipe the computer. Wipe. Wipe it off the wet. Yeah. If the.

Nick Weiger

If a. You know, if a still existing. Unless the still existing network wants it on their YouTube specifically, then it's just gone. Cause a lot of this stuff was on legacy video websites and those are all fucking dead, you know, and. And then if it's.

If it's on YouTube, it has to be a channel that still exists. But, yeah. Good luck finding grape lady.

Only an NFT now.

So we'll each go around, we'll give our Clo. But. Yes, Jacksterg. Returning to it. Returning to booking you on the show.

Emma

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm available. We know you got. We know you're busy. We know you know, you had a kid. And we're just always ready to make excuses.

Jackie Johnson

Every three years, y'all call and that's fine. Mitch and I always feel like we're bothering you when we go out to you. Do I give that impression? No, I just, like. We just know you got stuff going on, but we love to have you all.

Mike Mitchell

Do we give the impression? Are we bothersome? No. Really? Do I ever say no when you call me every three years?

That's a good point. If I did, then, you know, y'all wouldn't be calling. The show sucks. Show sucks. We'll get you on sooner.

Nick Weiger

We love having you here. You're one of our favorite guests. The last time I was on, y'all kept saying how bad the episode was. I remember being like, wow. But then y'all do that every episode.

Emma

Yeah. So I didn't really feel special. Things haven't gotten better. We've gotten older and dumber. Things have not gotten good.

Nick Weiger

People can now hear us and see us not be funny. Right. It's just like, will you hand me that plant?

Jackie Johnson

This is like a monstera, I believe. Like a. Is it really a mini monstera? It's a pothos, but a monstera leaf? Yes.

I just wanted to, like, kind of like. Whoa, whoa. I don't know. That's a good bit. Yeah.

Emma

Yeah. I just thought I'd do something like that. This is why monsters. This is why we have. This is why.

Nick Weiger

This is why we have video. So, you know, you can, like, put a plant on your head. I'm plant based. Whoa. We're going viral again.

Emilia Marino

You got good balance. Is this anything? Oh, shit. I mean, I like how you took a. Got a much smaller plant on your much bigger head.

Jackie Johnson

It's like the silver dollar pancake on the plate. Now, that's a pothos. This is kind of like us this episode. Oh, why? So I have better balance than you?

Mike Mitchell

Because this is hard. This is a hard one to balance. No, I'm cheating because this is wrapped around my chin. I don't really have balance like this. Why is.

I think I might have better balance than you. No, I have great balance.

All right, hold on. Maybe your hair's still silky smooth. Here, here, swap. Whoa, whoa. Swap here, swap.

Nick Weiger

I think that one has a bigger. Base, but I. Y'all should try this one. Cause it's automatic. Oh, you're right.

Mike Mitchell

This one is a little trickier. Wow. This is a little trickier. We're going viral right now. We're going viral right now.

Emma

Uh oh. Zoom that camera out, sweetie. I don't like this. Whoa. That gym's paying off.

Mike Mitchell

I might. I have a flat top head. More so than. Because I'm doing. Where are you balancing it at?

Just on the flat top of my head. Okay, so you're doing a little bit more forward. I think that's the trick. Yeah. It still wants to lean.

Jackie Johnson

How many episodes have you all done? You've never put the plants on your head yet? We've never done this. I also like that the guy who bell and hit his noggin in the bathroom and spills constantly says, I have great balance. I do have great balance.

Nick Weiger

It's hard to balance things on my head. You guys have. I have a huge head. Yeah. Jackie's balance.

Jackie's doing great. Jackie, you got good balance. I got pretty good balance. The Pilates are paying off. That's a good look.

Jackie Johnson

It hides the eyebrows.

Mike Mitchell

This is us this episode. We're. This is how plant based we are this episode. Oh wise. Can't get it right so that the three of us have.

Jackie Johnson

Charlie's did to us. Oh, so I see. You get it pretty far forward then. That's the trick. He can't.

Emma

He's. He's, like, not barely opening his mouth. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like he blew a fuse.

Mike Mitchell

And old. Very still. Yeah. Anyways, let's get to our final thoughts. Final thoughts.

Nick Weiger

So, Jackie, you've done the podcast before? Yes. We'll rate the chain from zero to five forks. Your thoughts on Mister Charlie? Okay.

Jackie Johnson

Obviously points for getting the vegan message out there. The nostalgia of the taste of McDonald's. That goes very far with me. Why are with his hands in the air so creepy, by the way? I just don't enjoy it.

Nick Weiger

Trying to have him on standby in case something starts to topple. Okay, there we go. I'll do it to make everyone feel comfortable. Cactus pose.

Jackie Johnson

You said to five forks? Yeah, zero to five forks.

Okay. Plant based, great. McDonald's nostalgic taste. Great. Yeah.

The message of the company. I like that they employ unhoused incarcerated folks. We love that. Right. They need a soda fountain.

Emma

Yeah. They need to up their pussy game on the fries. Yeah, sure. Wait, what? They need to step their pussy game up on the frog.

Mike Mitchell

Oh, okay. You heard what I said? I heard it. Right then. Yes.

Jackie Johnson

Yeah.

So. And I also think that they need an indoor cute space, by the way. I just want to talk about how. I just want to talk about how if you said that to them, how. How endearing it would be.

Mike Mitchell

And if I said that to them, how threatening it would be. Yeah. You need to up the pussy game on these fries.

Emma

I was trying not to laugh. Now, that is a viral meme clip. Isolate just that sentence with a plant. On my head.

I said.

Jackie Johnson

So I'm gonna go ahead and be generous and give it four. Wow. Four forks. Four forks. We reviewed spoons last time you were.

Here, and guess what? What's that? I'm giving an extra one. Making it four for the white sauce, bitches. Wow.

Emma

Wow. White sauce redemption. Wow. Justice for the white sauce. Wow.

Jackie Johnson

Four forks. Another thing that Mitch and I should not be saying. Justice for the white sauce.

Mike Mitchell

We need to bring justice for the white sauce wise. You want to go next? Well, how do you feel? Yeah, I'll go next. Okay, I'll go next.

Nick Weiger

Cause I know exactly where I stand, and I know where this place is headed. McCharlies. I'm sorry, Mister Charlie's. I almost speaker. I think I've been calling it that.

Yeah, but it's natural to call it MC Charlie's because it's trying to do McDonald's. But Mister Charlie. Mister Charlie's with the, you know, the. Enough plausible deniability to claim that it's not directly inspired by McDonald's, though it clearly is, I think belongs to the golden Plate club. Golden Arches Club, if you will.

I think this is a four fork chain. I think it's a pretty impressive execution. I agree with the jackster. It could, you know, up the pussy game on its fries. It definitely could add some desserts.

Emma

I think. Why not a vegan? A vegan apple pie, fountain drinks, please. Why not a. Why not a vegan McFlurry?

Nick Weiger

Why not an attempt at the classic sundae with the hot fudge and the nuts? That would be a lot of fun, right? I think that. I think they probably could explore more than McDonald's menu, but I do think, as it stands, I think this is a very impressive chain, and I think it's. It's a good concept, and I think they're doing good stuff.

And I can look past some of the obnoxious aspects of the branding to give this four forks. Cause I think that's what it deserves. Speaker one. I'm not sure if I'm there. I'm not sure if I'm there on the.

Mike Mitchell

This is insane. All right, well, we'll keep doing it. I'm not sure if I'm there on the four forks. I can't. I wonder if you can convince me on the four forks or if you want me to convince you.

Nick Weiger

I don't need to convince you. You should say what you think. There are interesting sodas there. I had the white grape soda. Yeah.

And these are canned sodas, to be clear. You should just stop trying to do the plant thing. It's fine. I've been doing pretty good. It's falling off your head constantly.

The little one you're gonna do. You've done great with each one. I had mine. I had mine. Steady on my head for a while.

Mike Mitchell

We look like freaking pikmins wives. Yeah, we do like. We look like freaking pikmins. I'm drinking soda. Wall Captain Olimar gonna come in here with, like, freaking pikmins.

Jackie Johnson

I'm balancing it while drinking soda. Yeah, that's impressive. We look like freaking pikmins. I'm over here looking like Bulbasaur. What the fuck's going on here wise?

Nick Weiger

You look like freaking bulbasaur. You look like pikmins. You look like, uh. You look like the, uh. You look like.

Jackie Johnson

Like a creep trying to, like, hide in an elementary school parking lot.

Mike Mitchell

Weiger looks like the most, uh, boring guy on a roller coaster.

Oh, I'm having fun now.

Um, I I thought what this chain is trying to do is be the vegan version of McDonald's. And I think that it is very. I think they do a very good job of doing it. And I. And it's tough for me because I don't know if this is a full four fork chain, but then I've also been accused of being anti vegetarian.

In the tournament. People thought I had out for the potato soft taco.

If you think it's a four fork, Jane, and you're a vegan, I think that that does a lot for me. Cause I was around 3.75 forks. Yeah. Can you do that? 3.75 forks?

Emma

Yeah, you can do that. You can do anything you want on this fucking bullshit podcast. But I wasn't. I'm not entirely sure. I think that they gotta up their french fries, they gotta get soda to.

Jackie Johnson

Up the posting game. That's why, for me, I feel like it's closer to 3.75. And I feel sad to ruin the Golden Plate club. I would. I would if I were you.

Mike Mitchell

And I would feel too sad. That's why I'm not gonna do it. I'll give it four forks. Four forks. Congratulations to Mister Charlies.

Nick Weiger

Welcome to the Golden Plate Club. Richly deserved. Wow, look at us plant heads. Clearly he, like, doesn't want to talk or do too much with the plant on his head. Bitch, take it off your fucking head.

I was doing pretty good. You're not going to balance this stuff on your head. You might have good balance. I do have good balance. The issue is my.

I think it's my head shape. Because I'm realizing I have to put it pretty far forward on my head. It naturally feels like it should rest up here. Yeah, but like I have to push it pretty. Cause this is a flat that.

Mike Mitchell

Usb ports. Fucking. All right. Can't bounce it on it. Yeah, if there was a plug on the plan, it would fit.

Jackie Johnson

Great. Actually, I'm gonna go ahead and say you suck at it. You're bad at it. I'm good at it. No, you're not.

Emma

I'm good at it. You're not good at it. You're the worst of the three. Yeah, but it's hard. Listen, we can't play the bassoon.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, you're great at the bassoon. Yeah, we all have our strengths. I got it. Look, I got it. Give me a couple weeks.

I think I could out bassoon you. No chance. You can. You can out bassoon the both of us. Yeah.

Yeah, but you suck with the fucking plant on it. I did priority. Great. Not everybody's got it. All right, that was our review of Mister Charlie's.

Nick Weiger

I've got a food related exam and Mitch and the Jackster must compete for superiority. It's another edition of Slop Quiz. Wow. Our second quiz today. And there is a mystery theme here.

Emma

Wow. So, you know, if you can figure out the mystery theme, you get an extra point. I'm gonna go into laptop mode here so they can keep the score. So buzz in with your name. I will ask each question in sequence.

Nick Weiger

The first question is which. Which Hershey's chocolate bar is known for its milk chocolate and peanut combo? Wait, what? Which Hershey's chocolate bar is known for its milk chocolate and peanut combo? Which milk chocolate bar?

Jackie Johnson

Jackie? Go ahead, Jackie. The milk chocolate peanut bar. It is not the milk chocolate peanut bar. I'm confused by this question.

Nick Weiger

Which Hershey's chocolate bar is known for its milk chocolate and peanut combo? I don't know. I was gonna say snickers, but, like, that's not Hershey's. No, it's gotta. It's gotta be a Hershey's bar.

Mike Mitchell

It's Mars. We were searching for Mister Goodbar. Mister Goodbar. I'm an idiot. I used to love those.

Emma

I'm an idiot. I didn't. I guess he would've gotten it, you. Know, like in Halloween. Mister Goodbar.

Jackie Johnson

You know in Halloween when there's those. The little variety bag with the little. Yeah. Yeah. It's been a long time since I had it.

Mike Mitchell

Mister Goodbar. Yeah. All right, question two. Next up, this snack food brand mascot was conceived in 1916 through a schoolboys sketch in a design contest. Once chosen as a winner, a commercial artist added a top hat, monocle, and candy Jackster.

Jackie Johnson

Mister Peanut. It is Mister Peanut, bitches. Mitch, the theme is peanuts. Mitch, you are not right. Are we allowed to chime in before you finish?

Yeah, okay. Yeah, no, that was fine there. All right, next up, rude. Now, which brand of all purpose product features a bald, muscular hunk as its mask jerky? I heard, Mitch.

Mike Mitchell

Mister clean. You are correct. It is Mister clean. Yes, I knew that. All the time.

I get confused for him. That makes sense. Number four, which brand, founded in 1956, is famous for this catchy jingle? Emma's gonna play the jingle.

Oh. Oh, God. I know this. We're hearing like, a little bit. Like what?

Nick Weiger

Something might be played from a truck. Jackie. Yes. Mister Goodbar. It's not Mister Goodbar.

Mike Mitchell

Wait, can you play it again? I know this. This is a jingle that might be played from a moving vehicle.

Nick Weiger

Casey's got it.

Gonna need an answer. Spoon man. I know this is driving nuts. Is there a time limit? No, but I mean, you know, within reason.

Emilia Marino

35 seconds left. Yeah, Jackie, go ahead. Good. And no, no, I already. Mister Goodbar.

Emma

Fuck. I'm trying to think of other ice creams. I'm trying to think of other ice creams. You were right. You gave it to me.

Mike Mitchell

Good humor. No, it's not good humor. Oh, see, I knew there was another one with good. I knew there was another one with good. Mister Frosty.

Nick Weiger

It is Mister Softy, but you are close. Wrong, bitch. You're close with the mister, though, Mister Goldbar. Yeah. All right, next up, this character is described by its creator as a child in a grown man's body and was developed while he was studying for his master's in electrical engineering in the early 1980s.

Mike Mitchell

Child in a grown man's body. Yes, Mitch. Yeah, Quigger?

Nick Weiger

I'm a totally young buddy. Okay, a mascot. One more time. This character is described by its creator as a child in a grown man's body and was developed while he was studying for his master's in electrical engineering in the early 1980s. 1980S.

Child in a grown man's body. Also, if you haven't figured out the. Theme, the theme may be a clue here. Mascots. Theme is not mascots.

It's more specific. Pedophiles. Oh, can I get a point for the theme? Yes, go ahead. The answers all have Mister in the name.

You are correct. Oh, and the answer here is. I have no fucking idea. The Six Flags guy is he mister somebody. It's not the Six Flags guy.

Mike Mitchell

Mister Six. It's not Mister Six. Jackie, you want to take a guess?

Jackie Johnson

Doctor Feelgood. Not doctor feel good. Mister good employ. It was Rowan Atkinson's mister Bean. Mister Bean also a food.

Nick Weiger

Well, it is in the food world. Bean is in there. Number six. Which international baked goods chain? I mean, no, well, you.

Jackie Johnson

Mister Bean. We don't think of food when we hear mister. I'm saying you've given me a hard time giving him a hard time. But now after hearing that, like, it's good to give him the hard time. Look at this fucking.

Mike Mitchell

What is that shit? Mister Bean. It's Mister Bean food. Mister Bean ain't no damn food. It's not food wise.

Nick Weiger

I think it counts. I get a point for that, mister. Mister. Yeah, you get a point for the mister. You got two points.

Jackie has one. You get your point. Next up, what international baked goods chain, originally found in the US in 1956, is still popular in Japan, Taiwan and Southeast Asia? Can you say it again? What international baked goods chain, originally founded in the US in 1956, is still popular in Japan, Taiwan and Southeast Asia?

We know there's gonna be a mister prefix. Yeah, we know that also. Did anyone catch. They said this is a. There is a mystery theme here, miss.

Jackie Johnson

I don't know. This is a good quiz. I'm gonna give you credit. It's a good quiz. I mean, the quiz, but yeah, it is a good quiz.

Mike Mitchell

Oh, so you do mad. That makes sense. You're pretty shitty.

I have no idea. We're looking for Mister Donut. Mister Donut. Mister Donut. I don't know it.

Nah, don't feel bad about it. Mister Donut. Oh, I don't. Don't feel bad. What is the online alias of.

Nick Weiger

Next up, what is the online alias of James Stephendonaldson, a youtuber with over 245 million subscribers? Jackie. Mister beast. It is Mister Beast, founder of a restaurant we reviewed. Mister Beast Burger, now subject of a lawsuit against Robert Earle and his empire of ghost kitchens.

Next up, this 1886 gothic novella written by Robert Louis Stevenson explores themes about the duality of human nature and features a scientist looking to separate his good side from his bad. Oh, I know this. No, I don't. No, I'm all. No, say it again.

I do know this 1886 gothic novella written by Robert Louis Stevenson. Does anyone's heads hurt from having the fucking plant on your head? No.

Robert Louis Stevenson, like, my vision's been fuzzy. Robert Louis Stevenson explores themes about the duality of human nature and features a scientist looking to separate his good side from his bad. Oh, wait, but it's Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde. Yes, I'll give it to you. No, that's what I was gonna say, but that's not mister.

The strange case of Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde. Oh, I see. I see you. King Mitch takes that one. It's three to two.

Mitch to Jackie. There's two left. Wait, I have three points. You have three points. Rub it in, bitch.

There's two left. It's anyone's game. It's anyone's game. Anyone's game. Number nine, King, Friday the 13th.

Lady Elaine Fairchild and Mister Mc. Mister Rogers neighborhood. It is Mister Rogers neighborhood. Bitch is gonna win. But we do have one more.

Mike Mitchell

Why don't we make this one for all the marbles? Okay, then this one will decide. So whoever wins this one wins the whole game. Yeah. Oh shit.

Emma

I see you. Pertinent to this week's chain. What band wrote the song Mister Charlie which served as inspiration for the vegan restaurant of the same name? I have no idea. I'm assuming this doesn't have a mister in the title because that one, the.

Nick Weiger

Mister is in the clue. It is not in the answer. Say it one more time. What band wrote the song Mister Charlie which served as inspiration for the vegan restaurant of the same name? Is this an eighties band?

It could be. Could be called an eighties band. It's certainly a band that you would go see live in concert. Maybe. Consume the Eagles.

It's not the Eagles. Arrowsmith? Not Aerosmith? No. This is a bit of.

More of a jam band. Oh, fish. Oh, man. Not fish. A jam band.

Jackie Johnson

The Grateful Dead. It is the grand. I'll give it to Jackie wins. Congratulations. Jackie wins.

Nick Weiger

As per Mitch's rules. That's what happens when you whisk it out.

Mike Mitchell

This isn't fair. At the end of it. I'm sorry, but it is at the end of it. That's what you said. It's not fair.

At the end of the game, I was all dizzy from the plant being on my head. I didn't know what was going on. Do you guys have soft spots on. Top of your head? Did your head never come back?

He was also pulling his head apart earlier something. He looks fucked up. It did make my vision blurry. Hey, just like a restaurant. Value.

Emma

Feedback. Let's all feedback today's email. There's no mister Slice. Answer. My old nickname.

Nick Weiger

Where is there a mister Slice? This is my name. So the clue would have been what's Mitch's oldest. What about the band mister? Mister.

Mister. Mister would have been good. What was their song? Roxanna. No, wait, that's Toto.

Jackie Johnson

They have a song called Keery. That's really good. Okay. I remember there was a band called Mister Big too. Oh, yeah.

Mike Mitchell

That'd have been fun. And there was also Mister Big. Of course. Geez. That would have been both.

Emma

Those would have been fun. What the hell? Those would have been fun. Note just like a restaurant via feedback. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

These broken wings. Oh, that's a good. He has amazing vocals. He's in Ringo stars all star band. Really?

And he sounds like an angel. Wow. Still. Wow. Cool.

Mike Mitchell

That's cool. Take these chicken wings and learn to fry again. Fry again. Yeah. There you go.

Nick Weiger

We'll do it for a future segment just like a restaurant. About your feedback. Let's open the feedback. Today's email is from Brian. Brian writes, hey, guys.

Haven't sent in a feedback question in a long time. I'm curious. What famous fast food item is seeing the steepest drop off in quality or taste in the last 20 years? I'd argue that a plain McDonald's cheeseburger doesn't taste the same after all these years. Wow.

That's a wild take. What do you think? I have not noticed a change in the plain McDonald's cheeseburger. Jackie, I'm wondering. I have an answer.

Is there anything you're still eating from when you were younger? Like, is there any sort of consistency, coherency there? Or is your diet changed so drastically that there's nothing that you have a commonality with? I remember a few years. I mean, this is, I guess, a long time ago now, but I went to the one sonic semi near us in Duarte, California.

Oh, yeah. But I'm sure we've all been. Yes. Kathryn Burns, who we brought up already, was house sitting somewhere semi close to there. And we drove all the way to the Duarte.

Jackie Johnson

And I was so excited. I got a grilled cheese sandwich. This was when I was just vegetarian. I took a bite. It was disgusting.

Emma

Wow. Salty, oily. And I just remember being like, has my palate shifted? Or is just. This was always trash.

Jackie Johnson

And I just didn't know it. I don't know if Sonic has stepped his pussy game back up since then, but it was nasty. Yeah. Shout out to the ocean waters and the cherry limeads. Katherine did the choreography for Renfield.

That's right. That's how I think. That's how you got brought up. Director of tomorrow. Yeah.

Nick Weiger

Wow. And producer of tomorrow. Samantha who's been on the podcast? I have an answer for this, and it's. We talked about this during munch madness.

Emma

Yeah. My answer is Pizza Hut pan pizza. Yeah, Pizza Hut's fallen off. Pizza Hut Pan pizza was good. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

When we were younger, they cooked it in a pan. It was buttery and crispy. It was in an oven that was very cool. What do they cook it in now? Not an oven.

It's, I think, mostly conveyor belts at pizza huts now, like the. The little fucking torch. And just. That's kind of. I mean, shit off.

It is kind of what happens now. Those. Just those, you know, those. Those conveyor belt ovens that they have at those pizza chains. Right.

I think that's probably my answer is that Pizza hut pan, pizza wise, is there. I know that there's other stuff, and there's stuff here in Hollywood there where I'm like. And I'm still loyal to it. Like, I don't go to, what's it called? Cactus taqueria as much anymore.

And I do think it sometimes can be hit or miss. But so much of those places that took. Have taken a fall on the 20 years I've been out here is, like, these restaurants that hills have gone through a pandemic. Right. You know what I mean?

And 20 years in Los Angeles was by. I mean, like, qi dynasty. Being open still is a miracle. I didn't even mean, like, yeah, there's so many restaurants where. Look, if you're a restaurant that lasts even ten years, even eight years, that is an accomplishment.

Nick Weiger

It's a dove industry. So. So. And out here, it's obviously very hard. So when you're talking about, like, fast food items, I think that's a little bit trickier, because I feel like it's that, you know, it's up and down.

Mike Mitchell

We've been talking about how Wendy's fries have really fallen off. That was gonna be my answer. Wendy's fries. But also, it's not. No, it's okay, because it's also not exactly what Brian is asking, which I think is because they've.

Nick Weiger

They've revised Wendy's fries a few times. They've been like, we got new fries. Check out our new fries. Like, they're trying to introduce them as a refresh. Yeah, like a refresher.

Mike Mitchell

Rebranding is they're doing a bad job. But I think it's more interesting. For instance, we're coming on the opposite side of our taco Bell tournament. I think the bean burrito has been very consistent at Taco Bell over the years, I feel like that's, like, very familiar. Versus the bean burrito I remember having as a boy, the winner of the mexican pizza.

Nick Weiger

People know by now the mexican pizza, however, I feel like, has fallen off quite a bit. I don't feel like it's quite at the same level that it used to be. I feel like Dunkin donuts. Donuts used to be so good. Over the past couple decades, I feel like.

So that makes a lot of sense. Dunkin donuts. That still hits, as they say. Yes, but I feel like a lot of the time, when you're not the. Same as when they baked the donuts in house.

That's the big thing. They have a central kitchen now, and they're shipping them into the stores instead of baking them in store. Obviously, that's gonna make a difference. Different. Mm hmm.

Jackie Johnson

Did y'all hear about the Wendy's thing where if you go at certain times, they charge you different? That was the thing. They floated. I think that was like a trial balloon, and I don't think they're ever actually going. Why would you ever think that was a good idea in this economy?

Emma

It's just. It's just dumb tech brain. Yeah, I was mad, too. It is dumb tech brain wise. If they.

Mike Mitchell

Tomorrow, if Wendy said we're bringing back our old fries, how crazy. Everyone would. So many people would go back to get the old fries. Were they the ones that had the skins on them? They originally.

They did it. Yeah. They used to not have skins. Then they added skin. Like, they added skin probably, what, 15 years ago or something.

Now, at least, I don't remember the. Exact timeline, but, yeah, that was a big thing they introduced, and it was like, whatever. Like, all natural. Exactly. Which is.

Emma

Who fucking gives a shit? Potato. But, yeah, they just have never quite landed on it. It goes back to what we're saying about McDonald's fries. You jack off on that potato.

Mike Mitchell

Is that what you're doing? No, it's just making a jack off motion. Like, this is, like, a dumb thing to do. You know, it's whatever. Like, we're gonna have surge pricing for our Wendy's.

Nick Weiger

Yeah, fucking whatever. You know? It's a little jack. A little frustration. Jack off motion.

Mike Mitchell

I couldn't tell if you were jacking off on, like, an ookie potato. No, I wasn't gonna jack off onto the fries. Okay. All right, all right. I didn't know if you were spilling cream on the potato.

Nick Weiger

No. Spilling whites. Spilling whites. Spilling whites on a potato. If it's a certain white can be good.

Jackie Johnson

If it was the sauce from today. Yeah. I still can never remember the name of this place. Mister Charlie's. Mister Charlie's.

Nick Weiger

Yeah. That is now in the Golden Plate club. That's right. It's true. Mister Charlie's.

I'm trying to think of anything else. I mean, like Jack in the box tacos, I feel like, are pretty frozen in time. I don't think those have really. I'm just trying to think of stuff they've had consistently over the years. I don't feel like that one has changed all that much, you know?

Jackie Johnson

Do y'all drink coffee? I do. What about the coffee chains? Has. Has there been consistency among the drinks at the coffee places?

Nick Weiger

Well, I've never loved Starbucks. I don't know if I've noticed any sort of drop off, you know? Have you? I don't drink coffee. You drink any coffee?

Jackie Johnson

I drink matcha. Are you so. Are you very, like. Like, do you just not like coffee or just like. No, I had to get.

I had to get off it. Yeah, I had. I was drinking the trentas every day. Oh, yeah. And I was driving and I was like, what's going on with my body?

So in 2013, I quit coffee, like, and it was truly, like, detoxing. Wow. And I had headaches, and it was a nightmare. And I have not drank coffee since. I've thought about doing that.

Emma

But. Are you caffeine free? No, I drink matcha now. Matcha has a little match ahead. Got it.

Jackie Johnson

It's sustained energy, as opposed to a spike in energy, which you get from. Coffee beans and you get. Do you drink that in the morning like you would coffee? Okay. I keep pondering it.

Nick Weiger

I mean, I actually just ordered a new french press. Cause I'm just trying to have. I'm trying to. I feel like it's. For some reason, it's gonna make me have a little bit less coffee than I do whenever I broke a big pot in the morning.

Emma

Yeah. But, um, hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it, you know? Yeah, but I gotta fucking figure it out. I'm having too much caffeine. Yeah.

Mike Mitchell

Here's my question. What gets the Austin Powers award? Where from, if you went back in time to the sixties and, you know, it, would the item taste the same then as it does now? Right. Like it's been in cryo sleep?

Jackie Johnson

Nothing would. Yeah. Yeah, probably nothing. No, we got all them GMO's and our corn and shit. Yeah, they've tried and they just kind of keep trying to do the things of just, like, you know, slightly reducing, like the size of a patty.

You know, it might be the same as that. The whopper, like that char broiled whatever. The whopper is a pretty good answer. Honestly. That whopper is pretty consistent.

Mike Mitchell

The whopper is pretty good. I think that there's probably a quality dip in that too, though. There has to be all around. I mean, not smaller. In beauty product world.

Emma

Yeah. There are creams that I spend $80 on, and then I open them recently, and they're like, what is this? Just the ingredient. Grades are all going down. The quality of our furniture and things.

Jackie Johnson

Heaven forbid you tap somebody in the parking lot and your whole frigging thing caves in. Right. I can't believe it. Yeah, it sucks. Who's got all this money?

Where are the corporate greed fat cats taking all the cash out of everything? I agree. Yeah. Fucking Amir and.

Emma

Jake and Amir. Yeah. Yeah. You in that all corner office. Let's close the curtains.

Jackie Johnson

That guy did close his office a few minutes ago, and I think it's cause he hurt us. And he was like, I'm trying to make calls over here. And Marty, Marty. Marty's got work to do. Trying to make calls, trying to get a replacement for doughboys.

Nick Weiger

I need two fat guys who are kind of dumb, not very funny, look like shit.

Yeah, this is a tough one. You know what? I have another one. Mashed potatoes from Kfc. Mitch, that's a great answer.

Mike Mitchell

Thank you. They've gotten so much worse, and there's been a precipitous drop off in quality of kfc sides. Yeah, 100%. That's very noticeable. Thank you, wives.

Nick Weiger

Kfc mashed potatoes. You know what? We ended this episode on you and me.

Mike Mitchell

This is how we ended the episode. Nice try. Nice try. Nice try, Jeff. Nice try.

See you in three years. If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us@feedbackirdfuck.com or leave us a voicemail at eight 30 godo. That's 830-463-6844 and to get the doughboys double our weekly bonus episode, plus our entire pre 2018 back catalog, subscribe@patreon.com doughboys. Our producers, Emma our brink. Our associate producer is Emilia Marino.

Nick Weiger

Our engineer is Casey Donahue. And our video editor is Mike Dorfman. If you're on Patreon and you pay for a back catalog, which is a picture of me and Wyag's back, let us know, because we could charge for that. So. And we live in a dystopian hour.

Mike Mitchell

We'll sell pictures of wife's feet, whatever we need. What are we going to do? Get those subscribers. I do get a minute to plug, right? Of course.

Nick Weiger

We're about to. Oh, we're gonna. You can plug. You can get. You're gonna take as many ones.

Jackie Johnson

Still listening. Jackie Johnson, our guest. No one's tapping out. They stay to the very end. Right wise, they can't get enough of the jackster.

Nick Weiger

And they should go see the jackster. Live in Texas, April 21 and April 28. Wow, look at that. How exciting is that? Live in Texas, your home state, your home straight.

Emma

You'll be sitting. If you come to the Dallas show, you're gonna be sitting next to my dad. Wow. That rules. John Johnson.

Wow. Real name. That's awesome. Yeah. Okay.

Jackie Johnson

Not only do I have plugs, I also have presents. Wow. I brought you both something, and I brought it in a west diagnostic in a urine sample bag. Wow. How about that?

Because I had this. Ooh. I think I have an idea of what it is. Jimmy got real interested. I had this in my.

I keep all bags. You never know when you're gonna need them. And I was gonna do a cute little gift bag, but then I saw this, and I said, this is great. Yeah. 24 hours urine sample.

Okay, ready? So I did a collab with this Houston based artisanal brand called source of a towel apothecary. And I did a line of products called the Kooky southern ant collection. This was before I. Yes.

This was before I had my own child in my belly. So this is my kooky southern ant ass oil. Wow. Wow. And I brought this for you based on you and Tony's conversation at the end of your episode a few weeks back.

And this is the kooky southern diozine natural deodorant. Whoa. For weiger from source. Vital for years because Jackie introduced me to it, and I've never gone back. That's right.

So if Emma wants to steal it. At the end of the show, this. It's a great. It's a great, like, gym bag item. Yeah, yeah.

It might be a little, like, you know. It's lovely. Yeah. It makes a really good room spray, too. Yeah.

Nick Weiger

What a great scent. If you. If you like, spray the toilet. Right. Water.

Jackie Johnson

You know, kind of like a poo pourriven. Now, this isn't for inside your ass. I just needed to clarify. Oh, yeah. Too late.

The bottle's empty. It's oil. Yeah. Yeah. Open it.

Put some on. Can I put it on. Yeah. Oh, this isn't piss at all. What the fuck?

Nick Weiger

Where do you put, like. But where do you put ass oil? It's body oil. Oh, it's body oil. We were just being funny.

Jackie Johnson

We were just being funny. Cause I always talk about. I always talk about oiling up your ass. God. Oiling your ass.

Emma

Yeah. Yeah. Oiling up your ass is self care. You mean like the exterior? Like, you're, like your cheeks?

Yeah. Yeah. I just think your ass deserves a little love. Yeah, sure. Lotion in your legs, you.

Jackie Johnson

Lotion in your arms. You oil up your ass. Yeah, why not? Yeah. Yeah, that dry skin.

Emma

Ooh. What do we think? Let's swap products. Let me try this one with that ass oil. Come on, give me the ass oil.

Mike Mitchell

Give me the ass oil. These legs are looking a little dry. Okay, let me try it out. Are they really? No, no, they actually don't.

Jackie Johnson

They look great. I am. I am very conscious of my skin, so. Yeah, no, they look great. I'll put a little bit on my thigh right here.

There we go. Ooh, that feels great. Smells lovely in here. It does. I could smell from here.

Nick Weiger

What a scent. Yeah, I don't remember. I know frankincense is one of the notes and I don't remember the rest. Oh, a grapefruit. I know there's a grapefruit note, but.

Mike Mitchell

Yeah, this guy's, he's the Daniel Plainview of ass oil. I drink your ass oil. Because in the movie says, I drink your oil. I'm an ass oil man.

Jackie Johnson

You look how beautiful. Your arm is glistening. It is, it is. Yeah. There's a, there's a nice little luminous straight back quality on my thigh now.

Nick Weiger

There we go. I actually have a miniature dozing deodorant.

Emma

Wow. Ooh, that smells nice. That's nice. Yeah. You're welcome.

Thank you. Yes. That's so kind. But I do have some plugs. Please, please plug away Jackie's plug corner.

Jackie Johnson

That's the note on my phone. Okay. First up, if you do live in Dallas, please go visit my sister's brew pub, Vector Brewing in Lake Highlands. We gotta go Victor Brewing. Go Vector.

Mike Mitchell

Vector Brewing. Yes. Okay. We go for the podcast. Credible.

Emma

Yes. They would love that incredible beer. They win the best of Dallas award. Like, they're great. So please go eat at my scissors brew pub.

Mike Mitchell

That rules. I also recently discovered the too good to go app. Do y'all know about this? No. There's this app called too good to go.

Jackie Johnson

And what it is is restaurants that have leftover food at the end of the day, sell it for, like, very discounted prices. And based on where you are, you can find places. And me and Highland park, there's a kitchen mouse. There's the coffee bean. There's Colorado donuts is on there.

Like, you can pay dollar four, and you get, like, dollar 20 worth of food. Wow. So it's to eliminate food waste. That's great. This is also in the UK.

It's very big in the UK. So if you all have the UK listeners, check out this app. I just recently found it, and it's a good way to get, like, food slash food waste. So you don't have a financial interest? I have.

No, no. I just found it, and I thought it would be fun to shout it out. So now my shows how to get a second husband. April 21, it's at Yam Dallas Lake Highlands, which is next door to my sister's brew pub. And when you buy a ticket, you get a free beer at her brew pub.

So how about that? And then April 28 is at fallout theater in downtown Austin. If you go to my Instagram ackiemichelleJohnson, click the bio link, and all the tickets are there. And then I want to say, shout out to my Patreon honeys. Patreon.com.

Jackie Johnson. Some of them are huge doughboy listeners. Oh, yeah. And I also want to say that every time I'm in public and I see one of my honeys, those are the nastpute listeners in the wild, and they're with their partner. The partner always goes, I love you on doughboys.

Emma

Always. So, like, the male partners. So, like, shout out to the crossover. Natchboot. Doughboy listeners.

Yeah. And cry, my Patreon honeys. And if anyone wants to come to my Patreon, I basically just talk shit there, and it's so fun. So sign me up. Yeah.

Jackie Johnson

Come hang out. Come do a Q and A. Wow. You know what? If I do y'all's Patreon, I should make y'all come do my Patreon.

Mike Mitchell

That's true. Yes. Happy to do it. We could do an Tron for a Tron. Yeah, we'll do a home and home.

Nick Weiger

Why not say Tron for a Tron? Yeah. Tron for a Tron. Pretty good. Thank you, baby.

Jackie Johnson

Up in this bitch. Those are all my plugs. Wow. Definitely. Definitely.

Nick Weiger

Check out all Jackie's stuff. One of the funniest, one of the best. Thank you so much for making time for us. We'll have you back sooner than later. We'll figure out these Patreon crossovers and we'll make it all happen.

But thank you for being here. 720 27, I'll see everybody back on. The show for wives and I. 2027. That feels so far away, doesn't it?

Jackie Johnson

No, but that sounds like so old 2027 just sounds. That's insane. Yeah. Three years into RFK junior s administration. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Well, that's an expiration date on my fucking neck to see when I'm fucking done for. Anyway, that'll do it for this episode of Doughboy. Until next. Time for the Spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

Nick Weiger

I'm Nick Weiger. Happy eating shit. I need to get it in time. Yeah, I did. Yeah.

Want to dress like the doughboys? Get all your favorite doughboys merch at Doughboys dot kinshipgoods.com.

Sources for the intro are in the episode description. That was a headgum podcast.

Emma

That was a headgum podcast.

Mr. Charlie's Told Me So with Jackie Johnson

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3: Personal Insights

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