Sean and Ethan read FANFICTION

In this episode, hosts Sean and Ethan read and discuss various fanfiction stories about themselves, exploring the bizarre and humorous scenarios fans have imagined.

1. Fanfiction can be both creative and boundary-pushing, illustrating the intense engagement of fans but also the need for respectful boundaries.
2. The hosts have a good-natured approach to fan content, able to laugh at themselves while also critiquing uncomfortable aspects.
3. Personal stories and side tangents by Sean and Ethan enrich the episode, providing insight into their lives beyond the podcast.
4. The episode serves as a reflection on the broader implications of being public figures in the digital age, where fans feel close enough to create detailed and personal content about creators.
5. The conversation touches on broader topics like the physical consequences of gaming and the impact of social media on privacy and personal boundaries.

1: Introduction

Sean and Ethan set the stage for reading fanfiction, discussing their initial reactions to discovering fan-made stories about them. They briefly explain what fanfiction is and their feelings about being featured in such stories.

2: Reading Fanfics

The hosts read excerpts from various fanfictions, reacting with humor and shock at the scenarios fans have written about them.

3: Discussions and Tangents

After reading, Sean and Ethan discuss broader topics like internet culture, the boundaries of fan interactions, and share personal anecdotes related to the content of the fanfics.

4: Reflections

They reflect on the nature of fan engagement and the impact of their online personas on such creative outputs by fans.

1. If you’re a creator, engage with fan content positively but set clear boundaries to maintain personal comfort and privacy.
2. For fans, remember that creators are real people with boundaries; respect their privacy and personal lives even in creative expressions.
3. Creators should appreciate fan engagement as it shows deep interest and connection to the content, but also guide fans on respectful ways to express their fandom.
4. Consider discussing fan interactions in public platforms to guide community behavior and set expectations.
5. Use humor and openness to address potentially uncomfortable fan content, turning awkward situations into engaging discussions.

This week on an all new Brain Leak, Sean and Ethan read fanfic of their teen love story and reminisce about high school, cringe vines and what kids are up to these days.

People

Sean McLoughlin, Ethan Nestor

Companies

Wood Elf Media

Content Warnings:

None

Sean McLoughlin
Brain leak. What happened to you? I died joking. It's from joking. I was edging too much.

I went on a week long edge spree. Oh. And I fucked up my wrist from it. Guys. Edge responsibly.

Ethan Nestor
That's really what you should be doing, is edging responsibly. Yeah, I got real skippity with this one. Ah. For you audio only listeners, Sean has a huge wrist brace on. Oh, he's got the Velcro.

Sean McLoughlin
Nice ASMR wrist action. I got cubital tunnel syndrome, which is like carpal tunnel, but carpal tunnel is for your wrist, and cubital tunnel is for the nerve in your elbow, basically your funny bone. Wait, so why do you have a thing on your wrist? Because I'm trying to, like, stiffen my arm. And the thing I got from my elbow didn't arrive yet, so.

Ethan Nestor
Oh. Keeping my wrist straight also helps. If I bend my wrist too much. It hurts. Was that from edging too much?

Sean McLoughlin
No, gaming. Gaming. Oh, hell yeah. Too much. When you have like, your controller in your hand or your mouse and keyboard, it's like your.

My wrist is bent and like, I. Apparently I hold the controller fucking wrong because that should be easier, holding it out in front of me. But no, I have to fucking sit like a weird little monkey man in my jamboree. I also hold the controller weird. I think I do like a little claw thing.

Yeah. How am I. I like, you'd think you just hold it like that. I hold it like this. Yeah.

Ethan Nestor
But do you ever do. Do you ever do this? Oh, the furled finger? Yeah, yeah, the furled finger. Yeah, I'll do that.

Sean McLoughlin
It's in elden ring. They made it a reference because elden or fromsoft players play like this. So now you can get an item that's a furled finger. I do that. Yeah.

Ethan Nestor
Well, this hand is normal, but, well. It'S because you gotta run and you gotta look around at the same time in fromsoft games. So you gotta do the claw. Uh huh. Um, but apparently I, like, play with the controller too close or something.

Sean McLoughlin
I don't know. Maybe my keyboard, maybe painting something with, like, your wrist bent, looking at something for hours on end. But we were in London to go see the Elden ring concert, funnily enough, and stardew Valley back to back. Amazing. One of the most incredible experiences.

Ethan Nestor
Puerto Rico. It was great time up there in Elden ring. I wouldn't say Elden ring has the best soundtrack. Maybe top ten. Maybe top ten would have preferred to be in the arnhem would have preferred.

Sean McLoughlin
To be in Yharnam. Great music there. Great people. Poor dera. He poured a yard.

And the way he says china, just yarnham.

Ethan Nestor
Yarn em. We went to see those. But we stayed in a hotel one night, and I must have fell asleep with my arm bent or something. Cause, okay, story time. That's a raven flashback.

Sean McLoughlin
She doesn't flashback. She flashes forward. What if all her life that we've seen in the show is actually her past? Oh, and it's all flashback. Well, the past happens.

Ethan Nestor
The past is created so quickly. Yeah. It's already written. The ink is dry. Mm hmm.

Sean McLoughlin
Anyway, I, um. When I was younger, I got hit in the elbow twice. So one time I was at a horse racing festival thing in Ireland. Did you bet it all? I lost it all.

And they took. Instead of breaking my knees, they broke my elbow. They're like, shiny, boy, we're gonna have to fucking take the ligaments. Could you imagine if they did that to baseball players or something like that? Do horses where it's like, oh, this baseball player broke his leg.

Ethan Nestor
Looks like we were gonna have to kill him. Sent him out to pasture. Oh, that's so sad. Oh. Anyway, you were hitting the elbow.

Sean McLoughlin
Me and my sister rolled towards one another when I was a kid, and she hit my funny bone. You know how you normally hit your funny bone? It's like, ooh, tingle. Ooh, uncomfortable. This was like at the horse race.

We weren't on the horses. We were just at a festival that had horse racing. And we were on the grass, bored as kids, rolling around. And we were doing that thing. It's like, let's see if we can.

Ethan Nestor
Like, roll towards one another. Bang child down. And I normally hit your funny pawn, and it's like, ooh, tingles. Ooh, I don't like it. And this one was like, not this time.

Sean McLoughlin
Like that. That's what I was like. And then when I was a teenager. Have I shown you what a hurl looks like? Have we talked about those?

Not puking a hurley for Irish Slither sport, I think. I don't even talk about it. Anyway, we were playing with my friends like that, and one of my friends was in goal, and you have to, like, grab the ball and hit it back and see who scores. And it was me and another friend. And then me and my friend who were out.

The ball came. I grabbed it in my left hand. He went to swing on the ball at the same time. So he just, like, hit me as hard as he could in the funny bone. And like, my whole.

My whole hand locked up for, like, 20 minutes, and I was just, like, sitting there in agony, and I didn't know what to do about it. I should probably should have gone to er. Yeah. But I didn't want to do that. Cause I was stone cold killer back then.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah, just walk it off, rub some dirt in it. But ever since then, I think I've nerve damage in my arm and I. Did you ever, like, if I touch that, it's really sensitive. It's like the nerve kind of sits outside, like, on the bone a little bit. So it's really sensitive.

Sean McLoughlin
So I slept in the hotel room probably, like, on my knuckles or, like, my arm bent up or something like that, and I woke up with, like, searing, shooting pains up into my fingers, and I was like, ooh, this is uncomfortable. I don't know what to do about it. And I went back to sleep. It went away, like, the next day. I've had it happen before, and it was really painful this time.

And then it went away. And then a week later, I was still feeling it, like, recording elden ring and stuff. And I was like, I don't know what I'm doing with my fingers or I can't bend properly. You have so many medical things that happen. You pass out taking a shit.

Ethan Nestor
You have this elbow thing. I got asthma. You got asthma? Adhd, TikTok told me, they confirmed that I have autism because I don't like smells and feels of things. Mm hmm.

You got it all, baby. I got hypermobility. I got hypermobility. Did you ever play baseball as a kid? Baseball?

Okay, well, with a. With a. With a swinging hitting sport. Did you ever. Did you ever have the thing where you go and swing to hit the ball and then you're using, like, a metal bat kind of thing and you can feel it, like, vibrate your arm because you hit it weird and hard.

Sean McLoughlin
It's like lightning hits the bat at the same time. Yeah. Feel it in your whole being. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like being aware of my bones.

Ethan Nestor
Mm hmm. I don't like being able to feel those things. No, Bones should stay in the body. Mm hmm. Bones should stay.

I. What do you. What do you think about that? We haven't had our moment on a podcast yet where we've sat down and I've gone, I think bones should stay in the body. And you're like, no fucking way.

Sean McLoughlin
You think bones should stay in the body? Are you an idiot? And then we argue about the bone. Should be outside of the body. What are you talking about?

Argue about it for an hour. Have you ever seen a bone outside the body? No, actually, I saw a bone outside the body once. I wouldn't recommend it. It was crazy.

Was it your bone or a butter bone? It was somebody else's bone. It was somebody else's bone. Spoiler warning. Spoiler warning.

Ethan Nestor
Talking about bones outside, out of the body. All right, so I was at a gymnastics meet, right? And there was someone on high bar. High bar is just the 1 bar that you grab on and you swing on, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, this person was doing a skill called a takachev.

Okay? So imagine I have to, like, kind of show what this. What this looks like. This is the bar, okay? And this is a person swinging on the bar.

This is their hands grabbing the bar. This is their feet. So they go around like this, and then they go. And they release. Their feet are up here.

They release. They go up and over the bar. That's not a tokachev bar. A tokachev. And then you catch it again.

The way that things are named is the first person to compete. It gets to name it. Yeah. So you go up and over, and then you catch. Yeah.

A lot of times, though, you don't catch, but there's mats underneath to you. So we're taught if you don't catch, you just spread out and you just kind of, like, belly flop onto the mat. So I saw somebody warming up. They were warming up their routine. They go to do a tokacha.

They go and they miss the bar. But instead of just going big splat, they put their hands down. And then this bone just went terrible. I don't like that. And it was crazy.

Because of adrenaline and shock, the kid just put his hand over his elbow and just walked away. Oh, my God. And, like, walked with his coat somewhere else. Swelled up like a fucking balloon two minutes later. Yeah, it was terrible, though.

Sean McLoughlin
Do you remember the kid's name? No, I had never met him. I want to make fun of him. I bet he has a stupid name like Tokachev.

Ethan Nestor
He was the great grandson of the guy who made the skill. Now he's bringing dishonor to his whole family line. Gen Z can't do anything. Millennials, they're not as tough as they were in the old days. When I used to go to school, I used to shovel shit on my way there.

Sean McLoughlin
I used to get hit by 16 cars and bounce my way into the schoolyard.

Brain leak. Do you want to kill your thirst? Then buy liquid death. Liquid death? You can get so many flavors.

Ethan Nestor
Like a Iced tEa.

Sean McLoughlin
Are you thirsty? Then get some Iced tEa. Get some iced tea. Ooh. Still in sparkling mountain water.

Ethan Nestor
Flavored sparkling water, 20 calories.

Is this a real advent? Yeah, we're rolling with this now. If you want to get liquid death, beautiful beverage. Lovely. One of the best.

One of the best beverages. Great flavors, both sides. Whether you want still Water, sparkliNg. Great flavors. You know, it's great.

And it's an aluminum can. It's great. It's fully recyclable. Fully recyclable. And what my thing about it is, is the can is so big.

Bigger than the rest. It's a huge can. Murder your thirst in the most efficient way. In their tall Boy cans. I saw a Reddit post where somebody had to get, uh, stopped because they thought they had alcohol in their thing.

Sean McLoughlin
It just looks like that. It's not. It's Water. But you can fit in with other people who are drinking if you want to. Mm hmm.

Crack open again, take a chug, fuck it up. Yeah. Listen, you can get free shipping, liquid deaths mountain water flavored sparkling and iced tea, eight packs with Amazon prime. Or you can grab a case 711 or target or Walmart or whole foods or an instacart. Or go to liquiddeath.com brain.

Ethan Nestor
That's liquid death.com brain. Check it all there. Healthy, infinitely recyclable. I'm having a hard time with that. Recyclable beverages.

You still closest real Taylor. I know. What's the link? Sean? I liquid death.com slash brain.

Sean McLoughlin
Go get yourself some severed lime. That's my favorite flavor. I like that one quite a bit. Severed lime is your favorite? It makes my tongue tingle.

Ethan Nestor
I think rest in peach. Or the mango chainsaw. Actually, I think mango chainsaw is my favorite. Yeah, mango chainsaw is pretty good. It's pretty tight.

Sean McLoughlin
But they also have iced tea. They have still water. They have sparkling water. You will look cool for all your friends. It's awesome.

Go get it. Mm hmm. Liquid death. Murder your thirst before the world murders you.

Ethan Nestor
Speaking of people not being as strong as they used to be. Yeah, I hurt my wrist. My arm's not working. You hurt your wrist. I have an activity for us to do today.

Ooh. Okay. Bench press. No pull ups. I'm terrible at all of those anymore.

Sean McLoughlin
I have no straps left in me. This won't work out your body. This will work out your heart. Oh, that's. That's a muscle.

You gotta work it out. Mm hmm. Over on the good old twitter. I'm already panicking. Who runs the social media tweeted a joke about jacksepticeye and crank gameplay smut.

Ethan Nestor
I thought it would be fun to dive into some of these smut stories and read a couple. We're actually going to leak our first leak live on camera. Yes. So I don't know if people use wattpad anymore, but it's a thing that people would make these stories about us, you know, a lot of it would be, uh, smut. It's all porn related.

Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Some of them are kind of wholesome, but a lot of them are not. Yeah, I don't like that. The top one I searched jacksepticeye crank gameplays cause I feel like a lot of these would have been written back before your name change.

Sean McLoughlin
The top one is youtubers ex child. Ah, no, don't do that. Don't do that, please, at all. Wake up. Two crank gameplays markiplier jacksepticeye au.

Ethan Nestor
I don't know what au means. Ooh. This one's called cranksepticeye and it's a picture of you topless as the thumbnail. Oh, baby. Sean and Ethan are partners in the iplier company.

Of course I don't wanna put undercover to do a job for Fishbok. I don't wanna I don't want to read that one. Some of these have a lot of people who have read them. I don't know if we can search by most read, but like Jacksepticeye x reader 534,000 reads. That's a lot.

Yeah, so many people have read that. So many people. Eyes Crank Gameplays X reader 201,000 reads. Crank gameplay's imagines 300,000 reads. Wow.

Sean McLoughlin
Why are none of these opening for me? Did we crash the website by just being two people on it?

Mine are. Mine are opening. The first one opened, but this, these don't I hate. So you can also see all of the, all of the chapters. Uh huh.

Ethan Nestor
Um, wow, there are so many chapters. What the fuck? There are, there are 87 chapters in this. That's a book. It is literally a book.

Time to read 10 hours and 50 minutes. Oh my God. It's like reading. Dude, I should, I want to do a stream now where I read an entire one of these. I I don't think I could.

Sean McLoughlin
I think I would get very upset very quickly. God. Ooh, I found one that's called feelings. Cranky septic guy. Sean is the guy, you know, the one guy that everyone gets along with.

Ethan Nestor
The one that nobody seems to have a problem with the nice guy, the funny guy, the attractive guy, the smart guy, the guy who has every girl in the school and even some of the boys chasing after him. Ethan is the new kid, and nobody ever likes the new kid. He's soft, socially anxious, awkward boy, which makes him vulnerable to the many dickheads and bullies of the school. Shawn has been dating his boyfriend Felix for four months. Wow.

And he's certain that nothing will come between them. That is, until he's forced to show the new kid around the school. Oh, hell, yeah. Okay, we should read it. It's not that long, actually.

Yeah, it's only two and a half hours. Is it? Yeah. Oh, this is just the first part. I see.

So how should we do this? Should we just read the first. Oh, there's a sequel. Wow. Should we just read the first chapter, and then we can skip to a different chapter?

Sean McLoughlin
Just read the first chapter and then the ending. I'm gonna see where it gets to. But the first chapter is called the new kid. It was the first day back at school after his Christmas break, and Shawn was far from excited. It wasn't exciting.

Ethan Nestor
Can you read this? More like Stephen fry. Hmm. That was even funny. It was the first day back at school after his Christmas break, and Shawn was far from excited.

Sean McLoughlin
It wasn't like school was a bad place for him. It just had. It's just that lessons bored him, and the homework sucked, and he felt a lot of stress. But other than that, it couldn't have been better for him. I sound like I've done this voice, like playing Fran Beau before as a cat.

Okay, you read the next chapter or the next part. Okay. How do you want me to read it? Whatever's come, whatever's bubbling up to the surface. All right.

Ethan Nestor
Sean was the guy that everyone liked. Not one person in that school didn't get along with him. He was smart, talented, attractive, brave, funny, kind, charming. So many adjectives. Every adjective you can think of.

Just everything you could hope for in a person. He had everybody chasing after him. Tons of girls liked him, and he even had a few guys confess their love to him. One of those guys he had feelings for, too. By this point, Shawn had been dating his boyfriend Felix for about four months.

Sean McLoughlin
He was happy with Felix, comfortable with him. He made him feel safe. And Sean hadn't failed that way with anybody else before. Nobody knew about them except for their best friends, like Mark, Bob, Wade, and Tyler. They were all incredibly popular and were known by everyone in the school.

Most people wanted to be friends with them and hang around with them. They were all in the same tutor group and most of the same classes. John was making his way by the tutor room as he only had five minutes left until the first bell of the day rang. Yeah, and it took a while for him to get there as his tutor room was on the top floor. He hadn't seen his boyfriend or any of his friends all that morning, which he found rather strange, but he shrugged it off.

Ethan Nestor
As he was walking up the stairs, he felt someone nudge him. He turned around and was face to face with his best friend, Mark. Whoa, I can't read that. This has a slur in it. She says the f slur.

Sean McLoughlin
Hey, slur. Mark greeted him. That's awful. What the fuck? Sean didn't mind that Mark called him that.

All of his friends called him that. It was just funny to him. When was this written? When was. Do we have a date?

Ethan Nestor
I don't see date anywhere. This is terrible. Well, there was a. The most recent comment is from a year ago, so I wonder. Hmm.

When was this written? It doesn't say. There's 27 comments on this one. And somebody said, this is me and all my friends and my twin to each other. It's fucking hilarious.

Sean McLoughlin
Somebody else also says, I always say the f slur is a joke because I'm gay as James Charles.

Ethan Nestor
So this was written in 2020. The first chapter was released in 2020.

Sean McLoughlin
Anyway, moving on. Mornin dipshit, Shawn replied with a mischievous grin on his face. Mark punched the smaller boy jokingly, and that soon escalated into play fighting. A loud, booming voice shouted at them to stop, and they obeyed almost immediately after Mark kicked his friend one last time. Did they just call me the smaller boy?

Ethan Nestor
I guess so. Jesus. The two walked up to their tutor room together, asking each other how they had been discussing their christmases had been, what their christmases had been like, what they had been up to recently. The first bell of the day rang loudly throughout the school just as the boys had reached the room they were searching for. And outside of the entrance stood bob, Wade, Tyler, and Felix.

Sean McLoughlin
As soon as they all saw each other, they beamed and went rushing up to each other, exchanging greetings and incredibly late Christmas present. You know, being a person that was in high school, I never acted that way around any of my friends. None of my friends and I were ever excited to see each other. It was just like, ah, another day of misery. We're seeing, like, you're in school at the end of the day.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah. Eventually the door was opened and they could go into their room, they sat down in their normal seating plan at the front of the classroom, on a table by themselves. The teacher misses Johnson suddenly clapped her hands to gain everybody's attention. Took a couple of tries, but it worked. Eventually.

Sean McLoughlin
Well, students, I'd like to say welcome back and I hope you all had a lovely Christmas. I'm sure you're all excited to see your friends again and you still feel that buzz from the festive season. But you're in school again now, so just make sure to listen, pay attention, and do what you're told, and you'll have another wonderful year. Her mini speech ended. One person at the back of the class stood up and began clapping, but stopped when the teacher shot them a cold air.

Why would you clap?

Ethan Nestor
The teachers explaining how to be good in school. Who claps? These are the people who clap at like a plane landing. Yeah, wonderful year. Yeah, right.

I could think of many things that are more wonderful than this, Mark announced when the rest of the class began talking again so the teacher didn't hear. I'm pretty sure eating my own foot. Is on that list, Bob responded, earning a chuckle from everybody on the table.

Suddenly, a hand appeared on the table. The boys looked up at who it belonged to. Jeez. Hey Sean. Or should I call you?

Sean McLoughlin
Or can I call you Jack? She said, smiling down at Sean in a sinister manner. No, you can't, he replied with no enthusiasm on his face or his voice whatsoever. Oh really? And why is that?

She replied. Because only my friends can call me that, and you're not my friend. The girlfriend put her hand on her hips, flipping her hair out of her face. We were friends at one point. We were very good friends.

She giggled after finishing her sentence. Tee hee. Yeah, two years ago now. Now you could just go back to your group of knockoff mean girls that come and earned a lunch from the boys on the table and a frown from Jack's crazy ass ex. Everyone thinks you're so nice.

You're just an asshole. You don't even acknowledge me, even after all of our history. And I ain't talking about the class. Ha. Our history.

Ethan Nestor
We did it for seven months and I gave you the chance to be friends with me after we broke up and you didn't take it. Your loss. The girl clenched her fists and grind her teeth before stomping back to her little click. Shawn, along with everybody else on the table, just rolled their eyes. Jesus, I swear she wasn't that crazy when you two were actually together, Bob said, staring at the girl the entire time.

Sean McLoughlin
Just put in Sean's ex.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah, she wasn't. My ex was actually a nice girl at one point. This really dates when this came out? Yeah, shock horror, Bob replied. The guys continue to talk for about another five minutes before the tutor goes over to them.

Shock horror? Yeah, that's what Bob says all the time. Shock horror.

Apparently you two were supposed to be in the principal's office when the tutor started, she said, glaring at each other, feeling confused. Who Meyer cast Sean. Sean widened his eyes and asked if he was the right person as he had never been told he was supposed to be in the office. The teacher confirmed that it was him by showing him the email. What do I have to go down for?

Me? Asked, not particularly wanting him to go down to the principal's office. That man intimidated Sean and his office was always dark and miserable. I don't know. I wasn't tugged.

Sean McLoughlin
Neither was I, Sean muttered. He grabbed his bag and stood up, swinging the item over his shoulder. He said goodbye to his friends and that would see and he would see them the next lesson. They waved to him as he approached the classroom door and walked out. He made his way down to the office and when he got there, he looked through the small window to see if the principal was actually in there.

Ethan Nestor
He sure was. Sean knocked on the door, kind of wanting to just run away and act like he was never there. The man gestured for him to enter the room and he did. Hello Sean, what can I do for you? Sean closed the door and maneuvered towards the desk.

You sent misses Johnson an email saying I need to come down here. The principal, Mister Smith, looked almost as puddled as Sean at this point. Puddled, did I? I only sent one email to misses Johnson, but it didn't have your name on it. Sean nodded, feeling incredibly uncomfortable.

She showed it to me. I meant it with somebody else. Oh, well, you're here now so you might as well do it. Sit down. The boy sat down immediately, the tone in the teacher's voice sending fear through him.

A new student is joining today. He's currently in the reception and needs somebody to show him around, explain the rules, policies, taking a lessons, etcetera. Would you be alright with doing that? Sean had always tried to welcome new students into the school despite him never being buddied with them. He hadn't done it recently, however, as the last time he did, he got punched in the face.

Needless to. Sure. Needless to say, that kid was expelled on his first day. Um, sure. The teacher smiled and stood up.

That's great. Follow me then he's been waiting for a while. Two began to walk down to the reception together. I have obviously talked to this kid and I should probably tell you that he's incredibly shy, so if he doesn't talk to you a whole lot, you shouldn't take it as a personal thing, Mister Smith explained. Shawn nodded, understanding what it's like to be shy as when he first joined that school, he was like that too.

Sean McLoughlin
If it wasn't for him befriending Mark, he probably wouldn't have been able or probably wouldn't have been as popular as he was. I don't like what you're insinuating here. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Us too. They finally got to the reception and waited for the automatic doors to open.

Ethan Nestor
When they did, Sean walked through the with the principal. He saw another boy sitting on the chair, looking down at his feet. Mister Smith walked over to the boy, saying hello to grab his attention. It worked. Sorry about that.

Sean McLoughlin
There was a mix up with your buddy, but he's here now. Ethan, this is Sean. Sean, this is Ethan. The boy stood up and Sean walked over to him, noticing how small he actually was. He could have only been about five foot five, five foot six at the most.

Ethan Nestor
Hey. Sean greeted the boy and held out his hand for a handshake. The other boy hesitated before slowly putting his hand forward and taking his buddies, shaking it quickly. Ethan the name was for what? Ethan, the name was for whatever reason stuck in Sean's head.

Sean McLoughlin
Yeah, cause you just said it. Now you don't have to worry, Ethan. Sean is a lovely, intelligent lad. He'll show us. He'll show you around the school, show you where to go and take you to your classes and so on.

I think you'll get on well. Ethan nodded. Sean noticed how this entire time Ethan had not lifted his eyes up from the floor. He was still looking down at his feet. Shaun was yet to see his face.

Ethan Nestor
Do you have your timetable? Mister Smith asked. Ethan nodded, holding that to show him. There's only about five minutes of tutor time left, but that should be enough for you to at least go get a look of your new tutor room, Shawn. We'll take you there, so off you go.

Sean McLoughlin
Ethan began to shuffle his way towards the automatic doors. For some reason, Sean was the one following him. After leaving the reception, the new boy slowed down so the other male could lead the way to his new tutor group. Sean wanted to say something so he didn't seem hostile, but he also didn't want to make Ethan more nervous than he was. Maybe he didn't want to talk.

Ethan Nestor
I love the way that the writer describes things sometimes so the other male could lead the way. They're like, I don't want to keep putting the names in too much. My english teacher would be very upset with me, so I gotta, like, spice it up. So scared? Shawn asked.

It was a dumb question, but it was the first thing that came to mind. Ethan nodded. That was the only communication he seemed to want to make. You don't have to be. This is a nice enough school.

Sean McLoughlin
You'll fit right in. That's when Ethan finally looked up and faced Sean, giving him a weak smile. Thanks, he said before looking down again. At that point, there was only one thing Sean could think about. He's beautiful.

End of chapter one. End of chapter one, baby. Now, obviously we're not gonna read the whole thing, but I think that we should go down. Sean, would you like to read the titles of all 32 chapters that we have here? Is this the one that's 10 hours?

Ethan Nestor
No, this is only two and a half. Oh, my God. The ten hour one is 87 chapters. Oh, my Christ. So that one was called the new kid.

Sean McLoughlin
Then we have chemistry questions, friends. Greg, something doesn't feel right. It's been a long day. Are you okay? Invite.

I'm sorry. Help the party. Leaving. Getting caught. Reassurance, confrontation.

Wake up. Grab a brush and put a little makeup. Talking about it. No apology is good enough. Back to school.

Pity partner break fight. My God, there's so fucking many. His father going back home. Paper. It's been two weeks.

Poems, backstabs, skipping school, and the last chapter is called one year later. I'm curious what one year later sounds like. We should read that one. All right. Oh, it's short.

Ethan Nestor
This is great. One year later. So spoil alert, everyone. This is sort of the epilogue of the story, so. Yeah, but we should be able to.

Sean McLoughlin
I think we got a good sense from all those chapter titles of what was happening. So now we can just read the last one and see if Harry Potter actually dies at the end. Yeah. It took a while for things to get back to some form of normality. About one year, to be precise.

When Ethan went back to school the day after him and Sean became a couple. Ooh. He spent the school days alone. But it wasn't all bad, since he got to see his lover at school every day. Sean carried out the rest of his suspension.

And despite his mother's best efforts to make him stay at home, he decided to go back to school to be with his boyfriend. Why was she making me stay at home? The two hung out alone for months not talking to the people they once called their friends. The whole school is very cautious around Sean a boy they once admired, who they were now terrified of. But that didn't bother him.

He had all he needed. What did I do? Did you kill someone? Did you kill Greg?

I guess you'd have to write the eponymous sequel to find out.

Ethan Nestor
Mark, Bob and Wade and Mark, Bob, Wade and Tyler began to realize they had been brainwashed by Felix and that they might have and that they missed Sean and Ethan. They decided to speak to the two boys and apologize for all that had happened. They apologized for isolating Sean and ganging up on him. Mark apologized to Ethan for exposing him. That one lunchtime the two boys forgave them all for what had happened and they all started on a clean slate hanging out together like they used to and leaving Felix on his own.

Sean McLoughlin
Oh. After weeks of being isolated Felix couldn't take it anymore and came to the conclusion that this was what he deserved for being so mean and unreasonable. He made a bold move of apologizing to everyone, but mostly to Sean. He admitted to dragging the whole situation out and being incredibly dramatic about one little kiss he started. He stated that he was over what Sean did and had moved on.

It was much more difficult for Sean to forgive Felix but after a few days, he came around and allowed Felix to be a part of their group once more. Students began to find out about what Craig did to Sean on the day he was stabbed with the pen and instantly began defending the suspended boy. Even Greg's own friends lost interest in him over it and became embarrassed to be around him. Soon Greg had nobody and dropped out of school. Not a single person heard from him afterwards.

Wait, did I stab him with a pen? This is. Fuck. Don't know. Ethan came out to his family as gay and explained that he had a boyfriend.

Everybody was supportive of him, especially his mother. Sean and Ethan came out together in school as a couple and not a single person had anything bad to say about it. Even Felix was happy for them. Speaking of whom, Felix began to date a lovely girl called Marzia and Marc started talking to a girl called Amy who he expressed his interest for in. The past, life became good again.

Ethan Nestor
The world became peaceful. Graduation day was getting closer and closer. Sean and Ethan both knew they would continue to spend every day together once that final ceremony rolled around possibly for the rest of their lives. The end. Well done.

Sean McLoughlin
Yeah. This feels like what it would be like to read Twilight to me a little bit. Yeah. I feel like that's what it feels like to go through it. Just.

That rollercoaster of Bella didn't know what was burning deep inside. Edward had the face of a snowplow. The chiseled jawline that could cut snow. Edward had the face of a snowplow. That was great.

There was a vivid picture in my mind of what was going on. This is so 2016 Tumblr era writing. Yeah. You know, it is inherently a little. A little cringy, but, you know, hats off to the author for writing 2 hours and 37 minutes of.

Ethan Nestor
I want to. I do want to see what's they have. Seven getting caught stories. Seven stories. Yeah, I.

Man, I kind of want to read that ten hour one on a stream. I can't stop until I read all 11 hours. That's how you get back into reading. Fuck dune. Fuck Brandon Sanderson.

Sean McLoughlin
It's Jack Spadisey pie and a ten hour smut pad. Oh, some imagines about the not so blue boy. I wrote these in 2017, 2018 and haven't added any since. So these are all a little outdated in terms of references and stuff, it might say. I've updated it recently, but that's purely to add necessary trigger warnings, because at the time, those weren't really included.

Ethan Nestor
Also, if Ethan ever does read a fanfiction video and sees it. No, you didn't. Yes, he did.

Sean McLoughlin
I also love that they put you in as, like, a five foot five little shy boy. Maybe five foot six at most. Yeah. I think when you're getting between five foot five and five foot six, I don't think anyone really cares about that inch. God, these chapter titles are really funny.

Ethan Nestor
One of them is called Peter Pan question mark.

Good stuff. I like that. For anybody who made stuff like that back in the past who was into, like, shipping and stuff, and they were all like, oh, that's okay. Like, they'll never see it. We saw everything.

Sean McLoughlin
Like, obviously, we didn't sit down and read these things, but we have perused them in the past where it's like, what are people writing about me? What are people saying? Or, like, going to a convention and then having people write stuff about us, and then we would kind of, like, giggle about it. Yeah. You know, I.

Ethan Nestor
I wouldn't say that I, like, miss, miss this kind of stuff because there was a lot of stuff like shipping and stuff that got out of hand, and it was really weird. And it's. Someone got stabbed with a pen. Someone got stabbed with a pen. Greg was never seen again.

But it does make me sort of nostalgic seeing this stuff from, like, 2016, 2017. And being like, oh, man, the fan base in full bloom, writing ten and a half hours of fan fiction. To be that into something I think shows a lot of. I'm not that into anything anymore. Like, being a 34 year old man, I'm like, I don't have the time.

Sean McLoughlin
I mean, I probably could, but I don't have the energy to dedicate to something like that. Like, if I'm writing something like that, it's gonna be a original story. I'm not gonna write something about you and me. So you just don't really care about our friendship, is what you're saying. No, it's that you don't care about it enough to just sit down and document your true feelings.

Took ten and a half hours to read. How long did it take to write? I can't imagine. Does it just fly off the top of the dome? Or are they sitting being like, no.

Gotta bust out the thesaurus on this one. Do you think they had someone edit it? Proofread it? Yeah, I hope. That is crazy, though.

Ethan Nestor
Like, outside. I'm sure you didn't do this in school for a project, so spending your time in this. This one, that is almost 11 hours. It was all written in a year. It was published.

Well, I guess I don't know that it was. It was published in from February to December of 2018. So, I mean, you remember what it's. Like to be a teenager, and you're in school and you get home, it's like, there's nothing to do. What am I gonna do?

Sean McLoughlin
And you just feel like a couple of afternoons with this, you're like, that was a good use of my time. I had a free period in school one time, and I wrote down from memory all the lyrics to breaking the habit by Linkin park. Cuz I was like, I love that song. Can I remember it all off the top of my head? Let's see, let's see.

It turns out I did. I nailed every single word. Yeah. What did you do when you were board in, like, study hall or something? If you couldn't go and, like, do something, what would you.

Ethan Nestor
What would you do? Well, I told the story about how I drew a giant cock and then had to bring it home and get signed because the teacher was like, show me that. So funny having to bring him drawing of a penis and have your parents sign it as if it's their art. Yeah.

Sean McLoughlin
Put your signature on there. We're gonna hang it in a museum. Um, I'm sure some parents would be upset by it, but my parents were just like, who fucking gives a shit? Yeah. At least you're not on drugs.

I don't know. I. When I was in secondary school, there was no phones. It was like SMS texting phones. And you had to pay for texts?

Yeah, like, you had to pay per text. So what are we gonna do? You remember having rollover minutes? Yeah, that was pretty cool. We didn't have, like, even when the whole world was getting Internet, my school didn't really get it until I was, like, 17.

So I was almost out of secondary school by then. I'm much older than you were. This is. This is true. Um, but, yeah.

What did I do in my spare time? Nothing. I just kind of like, was. I just existed. I would listen to shit on my.

You would get your Sony walkman and you would put it up your sleeve and put it into your sleeve and, like, listen to music in your arm, pretending you were just leaning on your thing, but you'd fucking Linkin park. Breaking the habit, playing, blasting. What did you do? We would also do that where we would sneak headphones into our thing and just like, lean over and pretend like that. Ethan, what's the answer?

Breaking the what?

Ethan Nestor
I would. So at the time, I was still in gymnastics. I used to take grid paper and I would, like, plan out like, a gymnastics gym and put all of the little equipment around. And I'd be like, this is where I want this to be. And that's where I want that to be.

I don't know. I did a lot of doodling. I did a lot of diddling myself in the back of the class. Um, let's see. We did have, like, school laptops, so I would go on miniclip and addicting games, which would.

Which were blocked at the school. But if you just did HTTPs, you could get around. Yeah, they thought they could. I feel bad for the kids now because shit's probably so advanced, those probably ways around it. But I'm like, when we were back at school, it's like, this site is blocked, and then you just change, like, one letter in the web address and it would not be blocked.

Uh huh. Or they had like, an unblocked for schools version of the website. Yeah, easy. But yeah, I went on mini clip a lot. Addicting games.

I would play kitten cannon. Oh, that's good. I like kitten cannon. Yeah, I forget a lot of the names of the games I played. Like, ones where you're like a truck, like a monster truck.

Sean McLoughlin
And you're going up ramps, kind of like trials. Those games. I would play that, like, stickman sniper game. Oh, yeah, fucking. Or I would play.

I think it was called Bowmaster or something where you had like. Like a tower. Yeah. And you had to, like, fire arrows across and hit the dudes as their waves were coming in. Yeah.

Ethan Nestor
So much fun. I still remember the music to that game kind of sounds lord. I would also go on photo booths on the laptop and just take photos of myself or the class. I don't know. I probably would sit there and fucking stare at the wall.

Imagine what a boob looked like. They say it feels like a bag of sand. That's what they always used to say back in the day. Like, american pie was like. It feels like warm apple pie.

Sean McLoughlin
And then it's like, around that era was like. It feels like a bag of sand. It's like. No, it doesn't. It doesn't feel like a bag of sand.

I'm not gonna put boobs down to stop water damage.

Ethan Nestor
There's a flood happening here. Just like, quick. Everyone wants boobs. Get on the ground. We need you.

Sean McLoughlin
Get your milkers. The bigger, the better. Misses Johnson, you're up. It's your time, baby. It's your time.

Yeah, I mean, school was very different for us, I think, compared to people now. Yeah. When I had. Cause the way that my high school worked, if you had a study hall, if you had a free period, you could only. You had to be in it.

Ethan Nestor
If you were a freshman or a sophomore, you could not leave the room. If you were a junior, you could leave. If you were on the honor roll, if you weren't on honor roll, you had to stay in that study hall. If you're a senior, you could do whatever you wanted. So junior and senior year, I would just, like, kind of walk around the school until I had a car, and then sometimes I would leave and just, like, go get pizza somewhere, and then I would skip class and then.

Sean McLoughlin
Damn. You were a bad boy. Yeah, kind of a bad boy. Don't. Never again, please.

Yeah, we weren't allowed. We could go across the street to a shop, but you weren't allowed to do that until you were in fifth and 6th year, which was the last two years. So then you were like 16 upwards. So you were like, old enough to do what you want. Yeah.

Ethan Nestor
Where would the kids go hang out? I don't know. I was never invited. Well, there was a. There was, like, a Marina near our school.

Sean McLoughlin
Like a 15 minutes walk. So you could go down there by the water and that's where everyone would go smoke and just leave. Damn. A lot of kids just lived nearby, so they would just go home for lunch and stuff. Ah, to be young again.

Ethan Nestor
You know, I think about it and I think, man, I remember that one time you went on your friend's roof and you smoked a cigarette. It was so bad. Remember that one time you were twelve and you thought lighting a piece of paper would be the same as smoking. And then you inhale it and it tastes fucking rancid and you almost die. Did you do that?

Sean McLoughlin
Yeah, I rolled up like a really tight piece of paper and was like, this is going to be like a cigarette. And I lit it and I was, I was probably younger than twelve, honestly, and I inhaled. I went fucking wanted to puke everywhere. Inhaling just straight smoke from a fucking. Inhaling straight trees.

I. That's awesome. I never liked smoking cigarettes. The first time I did it when I was in, well, I have a story about like, being drunk in college was the first time I smoked like an actual cigarette and it was out being drunk and I was like, I want to try it. I've never done it.

And everyone else saw the talk about so cool, and I tried it and I immediately got like crazy lightheaded, my tongue felt fuzzy. And then I was like, I legit feel like I'm gonna puke. And then, yeah, I think I tried it like once more after that. But another time we were at a house party with some. There was like a, like a student village where we were like just student dorms.

And then there was another one next to that. So we would like get the gate code and go into a house party there where some friends from a different college were. And then when we went in, we were all getting drunk and then everyone was like smoking cigarettes, whatever, and then they were like, oh, do you want. You want some? And then they like handed it to me and I was like, yeah, awesome.

And I took a big fucking drag out of it and gave back and I was like, I feel awful. And I was like so drunk and so dizzy. I was like. And I did the whole irish goodbye and I was just out the door, like, what is happening? Like a fucking train spotting drug trip.

You know when they have the Snorri cam attached to you and it's like going with you. And then I went out and puked on the buttons to get out, so. Puked on the buttons? Yeah, to open the gate. And then I can't remember anything after that.

And I realized then the next morning that they were smoking weed. And I think that that was the first time I ever tried weed when I was, like, I was I 19 and I just made me puke. And I was like, I don't think inhaled substances are for me. I never was invited to any parties when I was in high school. I never.

Well, this was college. Never went to a high school party. Oh, yeah, I guess so. College is very different because I was. I never really went to any parties in secondary school either.

Did you guys have any? I have any, like. Like, we would call them discos, which just sounds so fucking cringe, but it's like everyone goes here on a Friday night and there's, like, music playing and all the teenagers. Are there a dance, like, through the school? No, no, no.

Separate from the school. I mean, maybe, but I wasn't invited or knew about them, so I don't think so. But maybe. I don't know. That was where you would go to, like, no idea shift where you would go and kiss girls.

Ethan Nestor
Oh. And guys and girls would be like, let off the leash and just do whatever you want. Whatever happened in those doors wasn't that crazy, but it should stay in those doors. You know, it's so sad thinking back to my school because they banned dances at my school other than prom because too many people were grinding. And I'm like, man, at the time I was like, yeah.

At the time I was like, man, it's bullshit. But now I'm like, oh, that's, like, kind of fucked up that you would, like, take away, like, a formative, like, you know, those are the years where you're learning about yourself, and so just let the kids. They're gonna do it anyway. Yeah, you might as well do it, like, supervised. Yeah.

So I never had. Other than prom, we never had a dance in my high school, which kind of sucked. So sad. I mean, technically, we didn't have any in my school. We just did them outside of the school.

Sean McLoughlin
Like, there's, like, a town hall that you would go to for events and, like, badminton tournaments and things like that, and they would just clear that out. Kind of like a gym, I guess, for you guys. But it was separate from the school. They were just host things for the teenagers in the town. I grew up in very small towns, so not a lot happened.

Ethan Nestor
That's cool. I wish we had that. Wait, did you have prom or anything? Graduation. Yeah.

Sean McLoughlin
That's why if you've ever seen, there's a picture of me on the Internet where I have, like, am I in a suit with my arms together and my eyes are closed from the flash? That's my graduation. Nice. It popped up the other day on my recommendeds for some reason. The vine of you.

Ethan Nestor
Oh, which one? The one of you screaming in class. A lot of people don't realize that. I think that's a reference to Jerome Jar or Jarre. I never know how to pronounce his name because I think, was it him?

Sean McLoughlin
Somebody else was doing the trend of vines back then, where it's not like TikTok now, where somebody makes a trend and then everyone does it and you're cool for doing it. Back then, I was like, if you do the same trend, you're cringe. Like, you had to have your own original thing every time. But somebody else was doing that in vines, and I remember seeing it and thinking it was funny at lunch, and then I came back from lunch and did it myself. And I hate that vine.

I fucking hate that I did that. That's such, like, look at me energy. Such, like, oh, I don't have anything going on academically, but I can be funny. Watch this. Did people think it was funny, like, people that were in your class?

I mean, no, it was, like, a couple of guys around me, like, my friends. There was four of us in a row, and then the guy, I think he's in the vine in front of me. When I turned the camera around, you can kind of see him, like, hunch down, like, turning around. He was the one that convinced me to do it. And the reason they were annoyed with it that time is because it was the second time I did it because I fucked up the recording, so I screamed twice.

And everyone's like, oh, man. And then that other one, we had the Santa come around the school, the college, which now I'm like, why was there a Santa at a college for, like, 20 something year olds? Yeah. I think it was just, like, giving out free shit, and it was a fun way of doing it, and I did that. I finally met my own father and then went and like, yeah.

I'd seen people do ones where it's like, oh, we're in the age of smartphones, so people don't realize it's a video instead of a photo. That's why he goes, I'm like, oh, I hate them. I hate them so much. They're so cringey. Oh, boy.

Ethan Nestor
I don't know if I have any of my old vines downloaded at all. I don't. Well, the thing was, I uploaded those as, like, really short videos and called them vines. But back then, it was like people would just post their vines to YouTube, because why not? And so they went up on vine, but they also.

Sean McLoughlin
I posted them to YouTube. And then as YouTube shorts came in, they just converted them into shorts. So now they're in my shorts tab without me doing anything to them. So a lot of people thought I redownloaded them or re uploaded them, but I didn't. They just converted to shorts.

And now they're all getting, like, new traction. There's, like, people watching them now that had never seen them. And some of them have, like, 3 million views. And it's like, why is this being pushed to everybody? This is me.

Ethan Nestor
I love YouTube shorts. This is 20. Like, 2013 me or 2012. What's currently happening with TikTok right now? Is it around still in the US?

Sean McLoughlin
I don't live there. I don't know. I don't even know where the congress is. I don't either. I live here.

This is who you're giving a vote to, America? Mmm. Come on, America. Make the right decision. Probably gonna vote for Jimmy Bimbo or whatever his name is.

Don't even know the president. Jimmy Bimbo? Yeah. I don't know what's happening with TikTok here. I deleted it.

Ethan Nestor
Deleted Twitter. It's been great. I didn't delete my social. I still like TikTok. I saw some good.

Sean McLoughlin
Next time we're together, I can show you because they're fucking hilarious. I just deleted it because I was like, I spend so much time just going, which now I guess I still kind of do on YouTube shorts and Instagram. But, yeah, they get you everywhere. Well, the YouTube shorts ones suck. I know they all suck.

They're not as good. They're all bad and stupid, and I hate everything. Oh, bad and shittish. All bad and shittish. I saw, we went to get lunch the other day, and we saw, like, a kid looking around.

Well, he was a kid, like, right next to us. Like, fucking, like, right, right in our face. And they kept, you gonna be right next to me. They kept looking at Evelyn. I don't know.

I guess because she has tattoos and she's a grown woman, so kids are like, wow. Like, young girls look up and be like, is that gonna be me? But she was just staring at her and then staring at Evelyn's cupcake. And then, like, it's just looking at it, staring blindly and then pointed, like, shook the mom to be like, eh. I went there, and then the mom was just like, yeah, whatever.

And gave her the phone. I was like, do you want to watch last Friday night by Katy Perry? And the kid was like, yeah, I guess. Cause it has, like, a colorful music video and the kid was looking at it, and then she just started scrolling shorts. So seeing a kid just sit there with a phone vertically going.

And, like, it was. She was watching videos of, like, two young girls downing all the food they could, letting me whole bowls of ramen and then having it all over their faces and then going, ah, to the camera and then eating, like, giant gummy worms. And, like, this kid's getting fucking brain rot. Yeah. Just watching the brain rot happen in real time.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah. Like, oh, our brain rot developed over years and years. And you just get it right away. Yeah. Fucking before you can really talk.

Sean McLoughlin
Now kids are getting brain rotted. Wait, so how old is this kid? Like, four. Oh, that's definitely not older than five. They were a tiny child that didn't really speak, and they were just probably even younger than that.

Probably like, three. Kids are so big these days. But just the fact that she was scrolling and I'm like, this is, like, watching apes, like, figure out how technology works in real time. And I'm like, this is freaking me out. I don't know.

We had iPad kids before that watch Coco melon, and now it's like, I want to know, are the kids just, like, browsing, like, antifa shorts or something at some point? Like, gets stuck in the right wing politics? Oh, I wonder. I wonder what's going to happen with these generations. I feel so old.

I'm hoping that they all. I was gonna say, I hope they all die. The kids, the platforms. I want the platforms. I hope all the children are dead.

That's what happens to them. I hope, um. I hope Twitter dies. I hope Instagram's probably not gonna die because that's still pretty healthy. But I hope there's a big movement with kids at some point where they're like, oh, can I have your Twitter?

And they're like, you use social media? That is so cringe. That would be sick. Obviously not the bullying aspect of it, but just at a point where kids are now, like. Cause it used to be like, you're not on Facebook, really?

And then the kid goes home like, mom, can I have a phone? I gotta be on Facebook for my friends. I want it to be that we go through, like, the pendulum swings. We always say, I hope that the technology pendulum has gone way out, and it comes swinging back, screeching, and kids go outside and climb trees again, I. Saw a child riding a bike the other day, and I said, wow, I missed that.

Whoa. That's sick. Look at that kid go. He's zooming. I hope you don't get hit by a car.

There are more cars than ever. Back in my day, there were no cars. You would just walk. You would just walk everywhere. Damn.

Ethan Nestor
Uphill both ways, baby. Yeah. Sisyphus. They called me the sisyphus of Clon. They saw me with my school bag, heading to school up the hill, and they were like, there goes sisyphus again.

There he goes. I walked by a very cute, like, gay couple today with their dog that the dog was, like, running around the tree, and they had a giant leash that was. It wasn't one of the retractable ones. It was just a really long, like, strap. And the dog ran around, and then the guy tried to get the dog, but the dog kept running around.

Sean McLoughlin
And I was gonna. We walked by, like, giggling to them, and they were so fun about it, but I was gonna be like, this is like a sisyphean task. And I was like, I don't think that would have gone down well. I don't think anybody would have found that intriguing. I'm like, do they even know?

Ethan Nestor
Evelyn just, like, tapped you on the shoulder, and she's like, good job, Sean. You tried. Yeah, well, I did tell her I have to get my thoughts out one way or another. So she's my sounding board, and she's probably gonna bang her head against the wall until the day she dies to keep up with. That's true love, baby.

That's true love. True love is. Do you ever see that TikTok recently? It's like, tell me why marriage is hard. And then it's like showing the shoe rack, and the guy left his shoes on the floor next to it, and it's like, he could have just put them on the rack like that.

Sean McLoughlin
To them. That's what marriage is for me. It's for me and Evelyn, if we ever got married, it would be just her playing slave. The spire. And I'm just like, do you ever wonder what it would be like to be a star in a nice guy?

I wonder. We didn't talk about it yet. The aurora. Boring. Alice.

Ethan Nestor
I couldn't see it. You guys didn't get it in California? No. It was fucking epic. It seems like it was.

Sean McLoughlin
I saw it on Reddit that morning that it was like, oh, huge solar storm coming. Big Aurora borealis happening. And I was like, I saw the map of what they were showing. And I was like, well, England and Ireland aren't in that coverage, so we're not gonna see it. And then at like midnight, we're getting ready to go to bed.

And Sophie, Texas being like, you can see the Aurora borealis right now. I'm like, can you? And I looked out the window like this. We had to block out the light. And I was like, I think I'm just seeing the reflection of the light in the room.

And then we went outside and we could just see this big giant column of blue. And I was like, whoa. And then when you take out your phone because it has night mode, so it's long exposure, it comes up really clear. That's so cool. I know, it kind of freaked me out.

Ethan Nestor
Are you moving? No, I was just kind of hanging there. It was kind of like fading and then coming back of more vibrant, but it was like a bunch of different streaks. But what freaked me out, I guess this is like my fear of heights. Like fear of scale.

Sean McLoughlin
Because when you look up at the stars and you're like, I can't really make out where that is or how far away that is or what's happening. But then when you see a giant, like, fucking 150ft column in the air, you're like, oh, that's really high. I don't want it. I feel like I was gonna, like, fall into the sky. It was scary.

Ethan Nestor
That's sick. That's awesome. I want to see the northern lights for real someday and see them because Alana went to Alaska recently and she was saying that she saw them and she was like, it's crazy how fast it is. Like, the light in the sky is like really, like, moving around really fast. So cool.

Sean McLoughlin
Cause you got big fucking coronal mass ejections happening right now. What? Big fucking plasma bursts coming off the sun and then our magnetosphere is just like, halt. I saw really fucking badass, like, earth edits or it was like, who would win? The sun or one magnetic boy.

Ethan Nestor
One magnetic boy. Because it can have daylight auroras as well that come around the front as the thing hits, but it also goes around the back and then it, like, snaps together and then comes back and then it goes into the poles off the magnetic sphere. What the fucking sick. And then that electrically charges the atmosphere. And you can see it go bland.

See it go bl? Yeah. Big plasma boy. Big fucker. And we have a category.

Sean McLoughlin
Was it g five, gm five or something? The sun versus one magnetic. Hey, Mars lost its battle. Mars lost its magnetosphere. And that's why it's fucking sand right now.

Ethan Nestor
It used to know about that. We used to have water. It used to have tectonic activity. As the largest volcano or mountain in all of the solar system, it's called Olympus Mons. Wow, it's pretty fucking cool.

I didn't know you knew about all this. Hey, I'm a space guy. I live in the universe. I might as well learn about it. That's true.

Sean McLoughlin
I moved into this neighborhood. Might as well get to know my neighbors, you know? Actually, I didn't get to know my neighbors in my actual neighborhood because I don't like talking to them. Do you know any of their names? Nope.

I'm one of them. On one side of us is one of those, like, really nosy ladies that has nothing else going on in her life. So every now and then, a package will get held at our neighbors for us. And I'm like, not that one. Not that one.

Not number, this one. And then it's like, it comes up and I'm like, oh, my fucking God. I'm gonna have to talk to them. Either I go to them or they come to me, and then they come to the door and they're like, hi. Everything good?

Yeah, everything's fine. Uh huh. How's Emily? She's good.

She just goes, always good to celebrate the good things. I'm like, I'm gonna fucking drop kick you. But she's like, but it is good to celebrate the good things. But she's not saying it in a nice way. She's saying it to just keep the conversation going.

She's the type of neighbor that kept looking over our fence to see what construction we were doing, so she always knew what we were doing. I'm like, you don't need to know. A little head over. Yeah. Our other neighbors the other side then were like, the people who lived in your house before you did were total bitch.

They're like, we're so glad you live here. Can we put up a fence? We were like, yes, please. We don't want to see into your backyard. And they were like, sweet.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah, they wouldn't want a fence. Yeah, because they had a fence there, but it was, like, waist high, so they wanted to. You want a fence? Because the fucking other lady that lived here was apparently just a cunt that didn't want anybody to do anything. She just like, she made it a problem for everybody.

Sean McLoughlin
The people across the street apparently didn't like her either, so she just caused problems for everybody. Like, asked them to do things, wouldn't let them do anything in return. Just don't be like that. And then we were like, fence. Yeah, I want to be out in my yard with my fucking bollocks hanging out.

Just. Whoa. Oh. Aurora boreas, dipping them in the pond, going, oh, oh, oh. That time we don't have a pond anymore.

Ethan Nestor
What? We emptied it. We gave the fish away because the seagulls kept coming and eating them and then dying in the pond. And I was like, I don't want to deal with this. We have to feed them.

Sean McLoughlin
You have to pay for the upkeep of the pump. If the filters. If they change the water out every now and then, we have to get a guide to come over all the time to do it. It's fucking annoying. So we gave the fish to people who had a bigger pond, and now it's filled in.

And we've got, uh, slabs out there, so we have, like, an outdoor seating area. What? Send me a picture. Okay. You didn't ever tell me about this.

Ethan Nestor
This is fucked up. Except now the slabs are like black slate. And if you sit at our kitchen table, the sun bounces perfectly off them to fucking blind you. Like, it's just a big. You can't even see the individual tiles.

Sean McLoughlin
You just look out and it's a big, like, metal sheet almost just reflecting light. That's annoying. I go into my kitchen and fucking. Goddamn. Flashbang.

Ethan Nestor
Goddamn. Mmm. Anyway, my eyes don't work. My wrists don't work. Elbows fall.

God, your body. I got a migraine again last week. I was sitting down to paint, and I just saw, like, a dot of shimmering in the middle. And I was like, aw, man. Aw, man, here it comes again.

Sean McLoughlin
I took painkillers and I went and lay down in a dark room. And even when your eyes are closed, you see it, like, shimmering, and it makes shapes. And it was like a crescent moon. But it just like the aurora borealis. It had colors in it and it looked like comic book strips.

Ethan Nestor
Wow, that's. That's kind of sick. Yeah. And then for three days later, you get brain fog and you can't read or think. Damn, that's me every day.

Sean McLoughlin
I had an MRI done, though, and my brain came back clear. So I'm not dying. My. Just fucked. Maybe I should stop playing video games.

Maybe I play video games way too much. So my eyes are like, too much, and now my arms are like, too much. Don't let the doctor take away your joy. We're all gonna die someday. Might as well be now.

Yeah, why not? That's a horrible ideology. Well, everyone, thank you so much for listening. Hope you enjoyed our smut reading. We didn't really get to the smut part, but, you know, I don't think it's allowed.

Ethan Nestor
Why not? Cause it's all tits and ass and boobies and cocks and buttholes and.

Sean McLoughlin
And I guess I just talked about it now, so. Exactly. Ethan and I talk about shitting our assholes there probably in that. We probably did by the signs of it. I think we just kissed.

Ethan Nestor
I don't know. Maybe they talked about, you know, that style of writing has a lot of. Like, I felt his throbbing member. Ooh. Like any of those book talk recommendations.

Sean McLoughlin
It's like, you guys should read a court of thorns and roses. And then Evelyn read it. She's like, this is porn. Yeah, it's just smut, babe. Just like twilight.

Edward shoved his throbbing fangs into Bella's luscious neck. Dude, I'm getting rock hard right now. We gotta stop. Damn. Got a half chub working up already, baby.

Dude, is that a fucking semi you're driving? I'll give you a full one. Oh, I'm five five, maybe five six. And I'm a small boy. That is only popular because of Mark.

I'm a small boy. I will follow the other male. I am following other male. Thank you, sir. All right, everyone, we'll see you later, yeah.

From male one and male two. From male one and male two. See you next time. Stay leaky. Stay leaky.

Ethan Nestor
Drip, drip. All of the things. Bye bye, brain leak.

Sean McLoughlin
Bye bye, brain leak.