Ethan Got Lit On Fire!

Ethan Nestor
Brain leak. Big day yesterday. Okay? Big day yesterday. Huge day.

Seán McLoughlin
Massive opening to this episode. Hello, everybody. Welcome to Sean's big day. Thank you. Thank you, everybody.

Three cheers for the little guy. Hip hip, hooray. We went to no one is enough. We went to, who needs three cheers? What kind of narcissistic twat head needs three cheers?

Ethan Nestor
Well, who. How many people ask for cheers for themselves? Usually it's like three cheers for this guy. But why three? Just be like, everyone give it up for.

Seán McLoughlin
Anyway, we went out and got a roast on a Saturday instead of Sunday. Went to a garden center with PJ and Sophie. Epic fucking carvery. Got the works full as a bus. Then went to an artistic craft store.

Fucking awesome. I forget why I was telling this story. Because you had a big day. You had a big day. It was Saturday.

Yeah. And then after that, we watched Godfather part two. I've now seen the first two godfather movies, which I've never seen before. Massive. Then I got charcuterie afterwards.

Cause he was eating, like, cheeses and meats in the movie. Got red wine. Dude. I was ready to jisms. Oh, are you excited to watch the God father part three?

The godparter three? Not really. We were like, let's not watch that one, because everyone says it's bad, but I feel like we need to round out the story. Yeah. I haven't seen the godfather part three, and I haven't seen the first two godfathers since I was a child, so I should watch them again because I don't really remember much other than the.

Ethan Nestor
The horse in the bed. Yeah, we were watching, and I forgot that that came from the godfather because I'd seen it in everything else over the years. And then they cut to the guy's bed, and I was like, he has a horse. It's the scene. Here it comes.

Seán McLoughlin
Like the meme. Like, watch. Did you go to the same place that we went and got the roast? No, different place. That was a much better place, uh, that we went to because that was like an actual pub.

Ethan Nestor
I think of that place fondly. It was so small. Yeah, small in there. Like a little Hobbit house. So cozy.

So cozy in my life. Oh, really? God, you got that cozy with us? Yeah, it was so cozy. I was like, oh, wow.

And there was a fire right next to me. It actually, at one point, it got a little too cozy because I started sweating from all the. Yeah, all the roast. It's like when you. You got the bean sweats.

Seán McLoughlin
Yeah, it's like when you're a kid. And you, like, sit in front of the fire, and you're like, this is kind of like drying out my eyeballs, but I'm just gonna stay here, and it's like my face feels like crackled pork skin. Yeah, this is not good for me anymore. But it's fine. I'm cozy.

I used to stand in front of our fireplace when I was a kid and just, like, have my fucking ass right to it. And then whenever it was time to stop, my mother would just go, you're burning.

I must have been a liar because my pants were on fire. Oh, baby. Drain leak. Sean, out there, there's some creepy criminals that have got your information. They've got all your stuff, all right?

Ethan Nestor
And they're posting it all over the place. You don't want that, do you? No, I don't like that. No, you don't. You know data brokers, they sell your information to scammers, spammers, and anyone who may want to target you.

Your full email, your full name, your. Your health records, your relatives health records, their address, everything. I don't even know my health records and my relatives health records. I know, but I do. But you can't find mine because I've been using aura, the sponsor of today's episode.

All right? Or it shows me which data brokers are selling my information and automatically submits opt out requests for me. I don't have to go in there and say, hey, take down this stuff, or does it all for me. All right. Whoa.

Seán McLoughlin
And it's really easy to set up so I don't have to download several different apps to get things like antivirus, VPN, password management, parental controls, identity theft, insurance, and more. I get everything at one affordable price. That's right. Listen, you may already have one or two of these tools already, but not having aura is like locking the front door and leaving the back door wide open. My back door's so open.

Ethan Nestor
Mmm. But listen, aura's always on doing the hard work of keeping me safe. It can keep you safe. And I can focus on other tasks with peace of mind. I wanna be safe.

Seán McLoughlin
I'm gonna be safe. I'm gonna go to aura.com brainleak. Yeah, that's right. Aura.com. brainleak.

Ethan Nestor
Value your privacy like I value your privacy. Yeah. Stop data brokers from exposing your personal information. Get a 14 day free trial and see how much of yours is being sold. You deserve it.

You deserve good things. Aura.com, brainleak. Brain leak. Have you ever set yourself on fire? No.

By accident. Like self immolation. Yeah. Like, you accidentally burned yourself. Like, burned yourself, as in, there was a flame upon you?

Seán McLoughlin
Um, yeah, with, like, deodorant cans. You lit yourself on fire with deodorant cans? Yeah. When you were a kid and you get a lighter and a deodorant can you go, oh, you're like, whoa, that's awesome. And then it was like, let's spray it on my hand and see if it works.

Turns out it does. Don't do it. We're professional. Yeah, I never did that when I was. I did the deodorant thing, but I was never brave enough to put it on my hand, but I did.

Ethan Nestor
I did have someone light me on fire. Shortly after creator Clash, there was, like, a little party that everybody got together and had a little party, and there were people there that were doing fire stuff, and then they were like, does anyone want to volunteer? Will light part of you on fire, and we'll put it out. And I was like, I do it. You just did yourself.

It's probably fine. I just won a boxing match. I'm invincible right now. Let me on fire. Go ahead.

Seán McLoughlin
Go for it. Go ahead. See if you can light these steelers on flame. Yeah, it was crazy. It was so cool.

What did you get lit on fire? My crotch. I got my crotch lit on fire. Ooh. I was gonna joke at your self.

Cockfire. Yeah, cockfire, dude. It's crazy. That's cool. I wish my cock was on fire.

Ethan Nestor
It was kind of. It was kind of crazy and fun. I want to do a video where I go and see a stunt person, and I want to get my whole body lit on fire. I don't think you're allowed do that. No, you can't.

Seán McLoughlin
I think you need lots of training. No, no, no. They put you in the thing, and then they. You know, there's a whole thing. There's a whole thing to it.

Ethan Nestor
There's a whole. Wait, can you actually do that? Yeah, because I feel like inhaling flame is bad, and you need to be, like, trained to. I think. I think I like this little life.

Do you breathe when stuntmen are lit on fire? Isn't it like, the heat? Like, you can't breathe because the heat will go into your fucking lungs and burn your bronchioles. Interesting. How does.

Seán McLoughlin
You just said, I want to go get lit on fire, and now you're like, can you breathe fire? Cause there's also, like, okay. Like, petrol chemical kerosene, or whatever they light you with. Yeah, well, they. They put, like, a big gel all over your body that makes it so you don't get burnt.

Ethan Nestor
So when stunt performers are lit on fire, they wear a special clothing which insulates them from the fire. Similar what this man did. That's not usually. It is a flammable liquid or a gel that is used, and it is the fumes form that it is burning off. So for the first few seconds, you don't feel much.

After that, you are relying on the protective clothing. The sun person would also not want to be breathing in any superheated gases from the fire, so they may have to use a face piece as well. Oh, interesting. So don't really. Don't breathe flame.

Well, I did have an idea for today. Okay. I thought I have to find the thing. I have never heard you think before. Neither have I.

Okay. Actually, I have heard myself think before. Every time I think I'm making some sort of noise or making some weird face, and then there's not really a lot of thinking going on. It's mostly. It's usually your other side of you that's british comes out dead.

It's just kind of a. It's like a weird purgatory that my brain goes to. I can. I can slip into it so easily where there's. You're doing it right now.

Okay. What I was going to say was I've been an asshole before. You've been an asshole before. Everyone around us has been assholes before. We've all been assholes.

Seán McLoughlin
Okay? So why not peruse the Internet and look at a couple of posts from a very, very popular subreddit called I am the ass. I am an asshole. Am I the asshole? A Reddit subreddit where people post, hey, here's the scenario.

Ethan Nestor
Am I the asshole here? Yeah, usually it's like, please don't. Please tell me I'm not the asshole. Oh, please, for the love of God. I don't want to be a bad guy.

Seán McLoughlin
I kicked my dog when he came down with tuberculosis. Am I the asshole? Am I the asshole? Please. The top one for today is, am I the asshole for divorcing my husband because he's extremely overweight?

What's the all time one? What is the all time one? Hold on. Wait. Am I the.

Am I the asshole for telling my husband I told you so and laughing at me when we got the paternity test results? Oh, that's some real shit. Okay, so top of all time is am I the asshole for telling my wife the lock on my daughter's door does not get removed till my brother in law and his daughters are out of the house. Oh, wait. Are we on different subreddits?

I am on Aitah. Oh, I'm on r. Am I the asshole that has 17 million members? How many does yours have? Oh, 1.6.

This is fucking baby time. Baby time. Baby, baby time. Oh, this is way better. Now we're fucking cooking, right?

Ethan Nestor
Right. Let's look at this month. What's happened this month? Am I. Oh, here we go.

Am I the asshole for spending my son's university fund on a trip to Europe to drink beer like I always threatened, instead of giving it to his stepbrother after he passed away? Yes. What?

Hold on. Let me read this story.

Oh, my God. Wait. My son was smart. Everyone's saying, not the asshole, so let's. Let's give it a peruse.

All right. My son was smart. Smarter than me. I almost requested a paternity test because he was so damn intelligent. That is a joke.

My ex and I divorced when. When he was about twelve. She remarried when he was 14. I did. When he was 16, I had an resp set up for him.

I I don't know. That's an. That's an education fund in Canada. As long as he went for post secondary education, he could use the money for any. For anything.

I always told him that I was okay with him not going to university. That way I could use the money I had saved up for him to go to Belgium and buy some beer, uh, from monks. That only allow you to buy one case. He knew I was joking, and he always played along. He wouldn't.

He wouldn't let me get his goat. Wait. When he got accepted, you went to. Belgium to buy beer from monks? I guess so.

Seán McLoughlin
This is the weirdest sentence. When he got accepted to McGill, it was the proudest moment of my life. I took him out for a beer to celebrate his achievement and mourn the loss of my trip to Europe. My son was struck and killed by a drunk driver in March. I'm dealing with it.

Ethan Nestor
My ex is dealing with it. My wife has been nothing but my rock in this. She's holding me up. I was dealing with the funeral arrangements and everything when my ex came to talk to me about his money. She knew he had a scholarship and was just going to use the money for living expenses and an emergency fund.

She asked me what I was going to do with it. I said I was going to do what I said I always would. I was going to Europe to drink beer. She asked if she could have it for her stepson. I thought about it and said, no, her husband is a decent enough person.

But he made it clear that he wasn't responsible for any expenses for my son beyond food and shelter and stuff. Obviously, like I said, he's decent. I said I was not. I said I was not going to do that, that I was going to drink beer in my son's honor. She said, I'm wasting thousands of dollars, and I guess I am.

I have to give back. I have to give back the government portion of the fund, but I don't care. My ex thinks I'm being stupid and irresponsible and wasting my son's money like this. I don't care. My son would laugh his ass off if he knew I actually did it.

Actually, you're not the asshole. I rescind my asshole.

Seán McLoughlin
I think grief is difficult, and everyone deals with it differently, and you do whatever you feel. Plus, yeah, strangers on the Internet don't know you, so who really gives a fuck? Yeah, I also. I would also like to point out that I don't know how realistic any of these are because I don't know if I got into that situation with anybody that I would go to Reddit to seek validation for anything. Yeah.

So you can never tell if something's made up or if it's real, but this one feels real. My. My thing here is, when I originally read the title, I didn't realize that it was. I thought it said giving it to his, uh. Oh, yeah, his stepbrother.

Yeah. I didn't understand the hierarchy of what he was trying to say. Yeah. And so she. She.

Ethan Nestor
The ex wife wanted to use that money to give to her stepson, which would have no relation to the original father slash poster of the story. So now I'm like, oh, well, it's just. Yeah, it's his money that he set aside for his son. Why should her stepson get it? Yes, I agree.

Seán McLoughlin
Brain leak. What did they call it when a baby lifts a car to save a mother? A miracle.

Ethan Nestor
When a baby lifts a car to save a mother. Yeah.

That sounds like a dream, not a miracle. No, it's a miracle because that's the name of the sponsor. Did you know that your temperature at night can have one of the greatest impacts on your sleep quality? If you wake up too hot, too cold. Check out miracle's maeracle made sheets.

Seán McLoughlin
They're inspired by NASA tech. Come on.

Ethan Nestor
That sounds more like a dream, me trying to set it up. Cause it cheats. No, it's a miracle. Cause that's the name of the brand.

Did you know that traditional bedsheets can harbor more bacteria than a toilet seat? And you're putting your face on it. It can lead to acne, allergies, stuffy noses. It's just gross. But miracle made offers.

Seán McLoughlin
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Ethan Nestor
Yeah, listen, these are self cleaning sheets. These sheets are infused with silver that prevent up to 99.7% of bacterial growth, leaving them to stay cleaner and fresh three times longer than other sheets. So if you value yourself and not getting bacteria all up in your pores, then go to try miracle.com brain. B R a I N. That's trymiracle.com brain.

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But, you know, if you're not so sure about it, it's backed with a 30 day money back guarantee. Wow. If you're not 100% satisfied. Exactly. So try miracle.com brain.

Seán McLoughlin
Go get sheets. Get tall. Save your face.

Ethan Nestor
Brain leak. Also, I want to read ones where someone is the asshole. All of these, you can see, like, the blue tag under all of them saying, not the a hole. One of them is not the a hole. Poo mode.

Seán McLoughlin
I don't know what that means. Poo mode, baby. Oh, I'm gonna say that from now on, I drink my coffee in the morning, I'm gonna be like, oh, I'm going poo mode. I'm going poo mode, baby. Poo mode.

Going dark. Every morning, I drink a cup of coffee at least one. Usually two. Uh, this is not the am I the asshole? Story, but it is about my asshole, okay?

Ethan Nestor
So as it should be, you know, it's brainly. So I started taking a class recently, and I had the first. The first day of class the other day, and I woke up and I went to the coffee machine, and I was like, I can't have my coffee today because I'm afraid that I'll have this coffee and then I'll have to poop during class, and I can't do that. Were you afraid of shitting in front of the whole class? Yeah, I was afraid of shooting in front of the whole class.

Seán McLoughlin
Show and tell. Can you go and show what you. Everyone you brought to the class today just dump trout, dude. Hell, yeah, brother. If you had to bring something from your house, say you were doing a show and tell now, okay?

Ethan Nestor
Like, and this is for everybody my. Age now from this house. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody, you are your age now, and you have to bring in something for show and tell, okay? It's.

Maybe you're having a get together and the theme is show and tell. All right, calm down. All right. I think this is an interesting thought experiment. Okay?

What would you. What would you bring in to show and tell about? Are they friends or strangers? Mmm, that's a good question. Cause strangers.

I was as easy. I would just bring, like, a 10 million subscriber button or, like, a comic book or my gold record and, like, just. I have so much shit that I could just be like, I've lived a life, guys. You vain asshole. You fucking piece.

Seán McLoughlin
What else am I gonna bring in? God, that 75 pound berserk guy. And you have to carry him uphill both ways. The new sisyphus, I would say. You're showing friends.

Oh, yeah. Then I can't bring, like, play buttons and shit. Cause they already know that. Bring a bag of coffee, being like, ask me anything. Um, then, yeah, I would bring one of my dark horse berserk number ones and just be like, this is my favorite manga.

Pleased to tell you about it, if you are so inclined. What's the dark with a demon on the first page and you see butt cheeks and there's titties in almost every page. Glad you never told me this. If there's ever I'm gonna read, this is like, the version of, like, I'm not much of a cinephile. And then you go to, like, one of those websites that tracks nudity in movies, and you're like, turns out cinema was here all along.

Turns out I was watching peak. What is berserk about titties? Brief, brief synopsis. It's about the depravity of humanity. It's about the deepest, darkest depths of humans and what you have to go through to overcome all of that.

And there's a lot of evil in the world. And do you go along with it or do you fight against it? Kind of. Your second most recent tattoo is berserk, right? Yeah.

This is called the egg of the king or the crimson bail it. And if you have one of these, your utmost dream can come true. Which, in terms of one of the main characters, means that he kills all his friends and then he does some horrible shit that I would need to have several trigger warnings on this episode for. Whoa. It's very fucked up.

It's one of those stories where I'm like, everyone should read it, but also maybe not because it. There's a lot of abuse. Huh. Should I read it? I I really like it.

Ethan Nestor
Do you think I would like it? I think you would like some parts of it. Some other aspects of it can be a bit drawn out. But if you like the characters, then it's good. But there's a lot of cool shit in it, lot of titties you could.

Seán McLoughlin
It's. It's one of those things where it's, like, almost every single female character that shows up at one point. It's like, okay, how long is it gonna be until you're completely naked or topless? So it's just every single woman in the thing is just sexualized the whole time? Yeah, not sexualized all the time, but I I'm like, I'm fine if you have that much nudity in it.

But whenever it shows, like, guts or griffith naked, it's, like, kind of covered up. And I'm like, you're showing these other characters fully nude? Like, why aren't you showing the guys fully nude? Like, why aren't you showing the cock and balls? Yeah, I want to see some.

Ethan Nestor
Think more cock and balls should be shown in media? Yeah. Didn't, uh, didn't Barry Keoghan show his cock and balls? And I didn't watch that movie anyway. What would you bring for show and tell?

I was thinking about that. I was thinking. And you're not allowed to say Spencer? No. Can't bring Spencer to show and tell.

Can't bring Spencer to show and tell. What would I bring? Are you even able to think about stuff outside of your immediate vicinity? That's what I'm thinking about. I'm like, do I have anything that's not in this room?

Seán McLoughlin
It could be something. In your room. It could be something. Just bring your. Bring your ps five and be like, anyone want to play fortnite?

Ethan Nestor
Anybody want to play fortnite? Come on, we can play no build mode. It's fine. I'll show you my skills and you can tell me all about what a little bitch you are. I think just because it's kind of interesting to look at as a little time capsule, I I think I had them the last time you were here.

A while ago I found some vintage boxing magazines at a flea market. So I have some of those, and they're from the seventies, and they're just cool to look through because it's just. It's just a little time capsule. So maybe I would bring those back. When they were called pugilists.

Seán McLoughlin
Yeah, I just like the word pugilist.

Ethan Nestor
I downloaded this app.

It analyzes how much you say like in a sentence, and it gives you it. Well, it's not only like, but it's a bunch of filler words, but you can filter it out or you can just do all of them. And then it gives you prompts, so it gives you 32nd prompts to read and you're supposed to just kind of like, forget that you're using it and you have to just talk. I don't know if I would be able to forget. And then it tells you all of the.

All of the things. It's crazy. How many did you like? A lot. Well, the first time I only had three or, sorry, four likes because I was really self conscious about it, and then I didn't do it again, so I don't know.

Seán McLoughlin
Wow, you're really fucking shilling this app. And then you're like, I barely used it. It's awesome. Yeah, used it once. Anyway, I paid for a subscription for it, and it's probably going to come up in a rocket money ad at some point.

Ethan Nestor
It was a paid ad or a paid app. Actually, I did pay for it. It's not subscription based, though. I just realized that's ice cream in my mustache. Were you eating ice cream today?

Seán McLoughlin
I ate a whole tub of Ben and Jerry's before I came on here. Oh, my God. What flavor? Banoffee. What is that?

It's like a toffee banana cheesecake. You ate a whole pint of banoffee? Mm hmm. Damn, dude, you're gonna be shitting for weeks. See how strong I am?

You see these bones? So much calcium in that milk look at that. Oh, my gosh. Remember when I was buff? Remember when I was buff?

Ethan Nestor
We were both buff at one point. That's true. We should do it again. I'm just a heavy, fat old man now. We should do a 60 day challenge.

Seán McLoughlin
I would rather die so long. What about 30? Whenever I see people in movies now that are like, they have poor health and they're just eating cheese and wine, and I'm like, I get it. I understand. I want to min Max my life where I choose the path of least resistance.

And I don't want to move. I don't want to see people. I just want to play game and have ice cream shoveled into my face. Yeah. It's probably because I have adhd and my brain doesn't work properly and I need dopamine from a different source.

Buuuut. But why can't it be like gym? Why can't it be, like, lifting weights or running or something? I don't get runners high. I don't feel good after lifting weights.

I just feel tired. I know. I think that the boxing match, which this makes total sense, obviously, the boxing match is the best I've looked in my entire life, but I wouldn't recommend it to people as far as what I had to do every day. Cause I worked out twice a day. It was like a crash, of course.

Ethan Nestor
Keep track of everything. Yeah, it was so much. And I did enjoy it, but it's just not a sustainable. Well, yeah, you enjoy it because you have an end goal. I whenever I work out, I'm like, I'm gonna look good for this event.

Seán McLoughlin
I'm gonna look good for going away on holiday, which I never do. I wanna, like, it's always like, oh, the sidemen match is coming up. I wanna be healthier and not as heavy so I can run around and. And then that passes and I'm like, dude, pizza's awesome. Pizza's fuckin dope.

Ethan Nestor
Pizza's sick. I can't figure out what works for me. I can't. I, like, I know how to work out. I know what's involved.

Seán McLoughlin
I can get in great shape in, like, three months when I need to, but then it's like, how do I, how do I keep that going? How do I consistently? I think it's just a consistency thing. I think maybe my next goal will be get really fit again and then tone down the workouts just to maintain. See, I thought about doing that and I was like, maybe not.

Just not eat, like, a pint of ice cream, like, cut out the ice cream and the snacks and the whatever, and eat whatever you want. And I'm like, that just. It doesn't last. My brain doesn't work. Those synapses be misfiring.

Ethan Nestor
Why can't we just work out once and look really good? Why can't evolution just be like, you can do whatever you want. I'll take care of it. Yeah, they need to figure this out. Come on.

Seán McLoughlin
Fucking idiots. Uh, neuralink AI chip in a bueno. Give it to me. Give it to me and make me focus. Good.

Ethan Nestor
Please. Thank you. I did neuralink because I didn't want to eat ice cream. And how did it affect your life? It made me want ice cream more.

Wouldn't it be crazy to just think, oh, I don't have to do that? Do you have these times when you're walking down the street and you're like, if I step on that crack, everyone I love is going to die? Or like, if I don't successfully hold my breath for the next 15 seconds, then I'm gonna get hit by a car? You ever had that? Yeah, I'm.

Seán McLoughlin
I'm clinically diagnosed with OCD. So I do a lot of shit like that. I didn't know that. Yeah. I have a.

I have so many things where I like, uh. Oh. I squeezed all the fingers in this hand. Now I need to, like, squeeze all the rest of them. I like, I do a thing where I, like, breathe in, out, out, in.

And then I need to reverse that so it's out, in, in, out. I have to do a thing where I have to, like, you know how you can go, like. And you can like, move your uvula? I'll do that every now and then where I go, like. And I like, move it.

Because the sensation, like, I need it. Huh? Yeah. I didn't know that. I didn't know that you had had a diagnosis.

Yeah. It's a thing, like, I step on a crack with 1ft, and then I'm like, other foot feels weird. I need to step on the crack. Yeah, weird. Yeah.

So I do that. I don't do it where it's like, if I step on that crack, the world will end. I can't step on any cracks. Like, it's not. It's not a debilitating form of OCD.

It's not. I'm not like the. I need to switch light. Switches off constantly. My dad had that, but I don't have it.

Maybe in my later years, it's waiting for me. Maybe. I mean, in my brain I'm like, I know that this won't happen, but I'm like, wow. I just. I can't jinx it.

Ethan Nestor
I have to. Have you. Have you talked to your therapist about that? No. Maybe you should.

Maybe it'll be my little secret. Maybe if I talk to my therapist about it, she'll die. Yeah. So I can't say anything. That's just butterfly effect, isn't it?

Oh, man. Oh, if I eat. If I eat this butterfly, I'll shit. Butterfly effect in action. I feed a pint of ice cream.

Seán McLoughlin
Diarrhea. Butterflies.

Ethan Nestor
If I eat laxatives, I shit everywhere. Butterfly effect. Yeah. If I didn't eat them, wouldn't shit. Damn.

I had a moment in therapy where I caught myself the other day, and I went, oh, just like that. Actually. Where would you. Pinching one off? No, I wish.

Then I, like, ran out when she was like, all right, well, we're done. And then she called me out on it. She was like, oh, you're getting out the door real quick. And I was like, yeah, I'm embarrassed, because she was. You didn't call her mom, did you?

Seán McLoughlin
No. No. She was saying. She was asking me, how have your meds been? Have you been taking your meds on time?

Ethan Nestor
And I was saying, yeah, no, I've been taking my meds on time. Usually, though, I don't. I don't take my ADHD meds if I'm not working. And she said, why? And I said, well, I feel like they're wasted if I'm not doing work.

And then I went, oh.

And she was like, you caught that, huh? And I said, yeah, that's bad, isn't it? And she said, yeah. You don't just have ADC when you need to do something. I know.

Seán McLoughlin
You have it all the time. All the time. It's in here. I am a doctor. Doctor Han.

I am a surgeon. Yeah. But I said, yeah, I feel like I'm wasting my medication if I take it when I'm not working. And I realized. And I said, oh, sorry, I'm sorry.

Ethan Nestor
I shouldn't have said that. Oh, mortal. I said something I shouldn't have said to you, misses therapist. Are you gonna call me out on it? Jane.

Seán McLoughlin
Therapist. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Anyway, there's a huge, giant elephant in the room that we haven't attract, we haven't talked about. Get out of here, elephant.

I so desperately wanted to do that for Thankmus, to be like, there's an elephant in the room. And then Evelyn was like, I'll dress as the elephant and, like, put them in the audience and then be like, get the fuck out of here.

Ethan Nestor
You should do that next year. That would be funny. But you dyed your hair back, and we haven't said anything. Oh, yeah, I forgot. Hi.

I dyed my hair back. Hadn't said anything about it, but here it is now. I'm so glad you just recapped what I just said. I know. Just in case people weren't listening all the way.

And they went, wait, what did he say? I got you. Don't worry. Yeah. I have had blonde slash whitish hair since March of 2022.

So it's been over two years. And my hair was getting real funky because of the bleach. And I also just didn't feel like getting my hair bleached every. Yeah, it's pain in the ass month or whatever. It was just kind of getting annoying.

Seán McLoughlin
Well, pull the trigger. Did you? You woke up one day and you were like, not today. You put that cigarette out, you put down the whiskey, and you were like, no more. I don't even know.

Ethan Nestor
I think I just. I had my last hair appointment, and I was thinking, wow, this takes a long time. And then I was setting up my next haircut, and I said to myself, what if I just put it back for a while? Because I did like the white hair. I thought it suited me well, yeah, but it's just a pain in the ass.

So now my hair is back to, this is not my natural hair color. This is, like, actually a couple shades lighter than my natural hair color. Cause my natural hair color is pretty dark. It's like your. It's like your roots.

Maybe even a little bit darker than your roots. My roots are the color of your silver hair. What are you talking about? No, no, no. But your God given gear.

Seán McLoughlin
Gear. Yeah. So now I'm back to just being a normal guy, I guess. It's so weird because I'm. I'm like this close to just letting the gray go.

Ethan Nestor
Hmm. I'm like, it takes so long to get roots done, and I don't want to be one of those guys that's like, you just have this hard line of gray, and then everyone's like, dude, just let it go. I don't want to be that guy. It's very gray. You got your roots done, like, two weeks ago.

How often do you have to do it? To completely get rid of my greys? It's like more than once a month. Like, they grow back so apparent and so quick. I got it done.

Seán McLoughlin
A week later, the greys were already coming back. And I'm like, it's not worth it. You should just be full grey. I know, but I like. I like how I look with brown hair, and I'm not ready for it.

Ethan Nestor
Kind of cool. Everyone says that, but I don't think so. I thought it because it's just. It's just pure snow white, which I think looks a bit weird, but I'm like, I'm thinking about getting it just gray because I can't just let it grow out. It would just be a fucking hard line the entire way down.

Yeah. So I would just get it, like, the way you had it, like, silver, and then get, like, a dark belayage through it, like, highlights or low lights. That'd be cool. You should do that. Yeah, why not do that?

That'd be kind of sick. I should I do that? And then everyone's like, oh, my God, his hair is gray. And then he'd be like, it's not going back. What happened?

Seán McLoughlin
People already think I'm old with the way I talk and the way I look and the way I hate certain people, the way I hate and the way I vote.

Ethan Nestor
I was thinking the other day, I was just having a very nostalgic moment, thinking about old YouTube and stuff like that. And I was just sitting there and thinking, wow, we'll never be back there again. The good old days. It's the past. It's the past, you know?

Unless time is cyclical, and that's true, we could be in a never endless loop. If it's cyclical, then a boring number two boo boo. Who says it comes back around the same, you know, what if the biggest bongus comes back, sucks us all in. Boom. And that's like, ah, our planet's over there now instead of over there.

Seán McLoughlin
And butterfly effect. All because you ate that cheese earlier.

I ate cheese once, yeah, man. Farted in the wrong direction, caused the motorcyclist to crash, killed an old lady. Butterfly effect. Universe is ending soon. And you know what?

Ethan Nestor
It's fucked up that you haven't been prosecuted for that. Hey, what can I say? Your fault. At the end of the day, I'm. Young, I'm white, and I'm famous.

Seán McLoughlin
I can do whatever I want. I can do anything in the world, baby. Anything in the world. And if. And if they accuse me of it, I'll deny it.

I'll plead the fifth. I don't even think we have the fifth over here. I think that's an american thing. Do you know what pleading the fifth is? It's where you can deny answering questions that would incriminate you.

Right? Yeah. Because we watched an OJ Simpson thing after he died, and I was like, I should probably know more about this dude. He was so much fucking weirder than I thought. His book where he talks about how he killed people, but he's like, nah, I didn't do this.

Ethan Nestor
This is just if I did it, dude. The fact that he had our blood in his fucking car. He. He drove away after he was supposed to go to court and give himself up. And he drove away pointing a gun to his head and saying, I'm gonna do it, and then drove home, was like, I just gotta see my mom.

Seán McLoughlin
And then he was wearing the shoes that had the bloody footprints leading from the place. He didn't take his fuckin arthritis medicine, so his hands swelled up so the glove wouldn't fit. It's fucking crazy, dude. They found the other gloves outside his house and then claimed a cop planted it. It was fucking wild.

I also didn't realize how big of an NFL player he was. Meh. I was like, I knew. I knew he was in NFL, but I didn't realize he was like, he held records for NFL stuff. Yeah, the juice.

That's him. That's him. Yeah. It's kind of crazy. And I don't understand who let him write a book from the perspective of himself.

Ethan Nestor
If he had done it, quote unquote, why would he? He seeing videos of him read the book. It's like you're just recounting memories. You are recounting a memory. And there was like eight or nine cases of him, like, beating up his wife where she, like, called the police and they were like, do you have somewhere to go?

Seán McLoughlin
And she had, like, black eyes and cuts and everything. It's like, are you fucking shitting me? No one took that seriously. And then she was like, one day he's gonna end up killing me. Cause he beats me up already.

And that always leads from one to the other. If left unchecked. Yes, unpurified. And I'm like, what, are we fucking exercising ghosts? And then he went away.

And then years later, he ended up in fucking Vegas and he made a rap song that's really, really bad. Oh, I haven't listened to the rap song. He robbed someone at gunpoint to steal back his shit that somebody else stole from him. And then he went to jail for that dude. Anyway.

Ethan Nestor
OJ Simpson, everybody. Yeah, but that's how I learned about the fifth, because people were pleading the fifth. Yeah. The racist cop played the fifth a lot. It was.

It was crazy. It was crazy. Crazy. Anyway, that's the american dream. Yeah.

Getting away with it. That is the american dream. Yeah. Getting away with murder is a lot of people's dream. Oh, man.

What would you do if the purge was legal? If the pur. Or. Well, if the purge tapped. Happened.

Yeah, what'd you do? I would lock myself inside my house and hope that nobody ever comes near me. Mmm. You wouldn't do a cool little crime? No.

Steal from the book fair? Dude, I'm afraid to go out legally. Hmm. I'm afraid to go out and make phone calls and talk to other people legally, in case I make a fool of myself. I think I'd do a crime.

Seán McLoughlin
What would you do? Did you know that it's illegal to. What's it called? What's it called when you. Indecent exposure.

Ethan Nestor
No, no. That would be fun, too. But when you put insider trading. When you put sheep into paddock, charging. Charging sheep.

Seán McLoughlin
Huh? Herding. Herding. No. Where are you gonna find sheep in LA?

Ethan Nestor
Hold on. What's it. What's it called? What's it called? What are you trying to say?

Seán McLoughlin
Use your words. I can't. I just can't. Hold on. California.

Ethan Nestor
Wait, wait. Chastising sheep. Drive sheep. Drive sheep. Driving.

Driving sheep. You drive sheep. Okay. Anyway, like, when you move them from. One field to another.

Yeah. In Hollywood, it is illegal to drive more than 2000 sheep down Hollywood Boulevard. Boulevard at one time. So you can do 1999 sheep. You could actually.

You could do 2000 sheep, just not. Who's counting the sheep? You're down there with, like, 1500 sheep, and they're like, that looks legal. I kind of want to. I kind of want to get a bunch of sheep.

2000 sheep, and pull out this law and have a cop come up to me and say, hey, you can't do this. And I'll go, actually, this is less than 2000 sheep. You realize that the purge makes everything legal, so you're walking down with sheep while someone's just going to shoot you in the head. No. The cop comes up and stops you and is like, instead of just explaining this to you, I'm just going to lay you out.

Well, hold on, though, Sean. Hold on. Because why would they. How? Who?

Only a fool would shoot me in that scenario. Because if they kill me, where the sheep gonna go? They're gonna go crazy if there's no one there to control these. Hollywood Boulevard. Chinese theater's ruined.

Yeah. So I don't know what else? If they're thinking, they'll say, oh, we can't shoot this guy. I'll be invincible. Because they don't want to get out of control.

Uh huh. The sheep will rise up. And at that point, because the law is more than 2000 sheep, I will have amassed tens of thousands of sheep that I'm driving down Hollywood Boulevard. Hollywood Boulevard is very, very. You said boulevard.

Seán McLoughlin
What is happening to you? Nothing. It's a normal day for me, but I'm. I'm gonna have a bunch of sheep bring them down Hollywood Boulevard. That is a more unique one.

I want to, like, piss in public. Mm hmm. And places where it's not legal, like public. Oh, what if I, what if I burn the american flag? Huh?

Is that illegal? Legal? I guess. Is it? Yeah.

Ethan Nestor
You. You also can't say, like, make a direct threat to the president. I feel like many people have made a threat to the president. Yeah. How do you can't, like, how do.

Seán McLoughlin
You differentiate a joke? I don't know. Are we going to get arrested if we say it in this, even jokingly? I don't think so. Because it's a joke.

Ethan Nestor
But if you were to say, like, I want to kill the president, you can't say that. But in this. This is for context. Don't take this out of context. Ethan's going to jail.

Do you want to know the dumbest laws in Maine? Sure. I can tell you after January 14, you can be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up. Mmm. In Maine.

Mm hmm. Okay. In Waterville, Maine, it's illegal to blow one's nose in public. Mm hmm. Huh.

In port in Portland, Maine, where I grew up, it's on. It's unlawful to tickle a woman's chin with a feather duster.

Seán McLoughlin
Why? Who went around, the great tickler of the east, went around and tortured women all across Maine. And then they were like, we gotta outlaw this shit in New Orleans. In Louisiana, you cannot tie an alligator to a fire hydrant. That seems fair.

I understand that one. Mourners at awake may not eat more than three sandwiches. You've hide your feel. Get the fuck out. So I'm looking at a list of the dumbest laws in each state.

Ethan Nestor
I think all of these are just extremely old laws that are just. They just never got rid of them. And so it's not like you're actually gonna get charged with these things. You could though. In Indiana, it is against the law to pass a horse on the street.

Seán McLoughlin
That's not up to you. Well, no, the horse can pass you. You just can't pass the horse. Oh. So if you see a horse, you have to stand still.

Ethan Nestor
Yeah. And like, red light, green light, just be like, clip clop, clip cl. Okay, he's gone. Clip clop, clip clop. Ooh.

If any person has a puppet show, wire dancing or tumbling act in the state of Indiana and receives money for it, they will be fined $3 under the act to prevent certain amoral practices law. These are weird. No. 1 may catch a fish with his bare hands.

Seán McLoughlin
When you guys talked about the right to bear arms, that wasn't for fish. You gotta shoot them in a barrel. Back in 1924. Back in 1924, a monkey was convicted in South Bend, Indiana of the crime of smoking a cigarette and sentenced to pay $25 fine. And the trial cost.

Did the monkey represent himself? I don't know how. You can't. You can't do that, can you? I don't know if you can prosecute a creature that can't understand what it's being prosecuted for.

Ethan Nestor
Right? But you can prosecute someone else on a creature's behalf. Like, remember, I think it was also a monkey or something like that. Somebody prosecuted somebody else on a monkey's behalf because someone took a photo of it without the monkey's consent. Do you remember that Jesus Christ.

Monkey photo conspiracy trial? I think it was in Scotland. Some guy trained his girlfriend's dog to do a nazi salute and then he got convicted. Monkey selfie copyright dispute between 2011 and 2018, a series of disputes took place about the copyright status of selfies taken by a cell crested macaw or, yeah, macaw monkey, using equipment belonging to the british wildlife photographer David J. Slater.

The disputes involved Wikipedia Commons and the blog tech dirt, which have hosted the images following their publication. Newspapers. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. In July 20, 2011, a dispute over Slater's objections that he holds the copyright and people for the ethical treatment of animals, PETA. So PETA sued this person who argued that the copyright should be assigned to the monkey, Slater, because it was a selfie.

Hold on, let me, let me send you the photo of this monkey. This is the selfie of the monkey. I've seen that before.

Slater argued that he is, he has a valid copyright claim because he engineered the situation that resulted in the pictures traveling to Indonesia by traveling to Indonesia, befriending a group of wild macaws, and setting up his camera equipment in a way that a selfie might come about. Slater stated in August that as a result of the pictures being available on Wikipedia, he had lost at least 10,000 pounds income, and his business as. And his business as a wildlife photographer was being harmed. That is so. You know what they say.

Seán McLoughlin
Monkey see, monkey do. I know. Monkey pee all over you. Wait, so did the monkey win in 2017? Slater said he was no longer motivated to take photographs because he had become depressed and that his efforts to highlight the plight of monkeys had backed fired on my private life and ruined his life.

Damn. Those monkeys fucked him up. Whoa, dude, that's crazy. So did he. Who won the monkey selfie?

Who won the monkey case? Okay. It was. The court issued its ruling in favor of Slater, the photographer, finding that the animals have no legal authority to hold copyright claims. Take that, Peter.

Ethan Nestor
So Peter sued this man on a monkey's behalf because the monkey took a selfie. Hey.

Seán McLoughlin
The monkey. The world's I don't know. In Iowa, a man with a mustache may never kiss a woman in public. Shit. What about full beard?

Ethan Nestor
If it's detached, I think you would be able to fight that because I wouldn't say that you. I wouldn't say that you have a mustache. I would say that you have a beard. My facial hair is all connected, so it's a beard. If I cut these parts, I have a beard and a mustache.

When was the last time you had a mustache? Never. No, you should do it. What would it take? I don't know.

Seán McLoughlin
My dad had a mustache, so I'm like, I don't want one. Come on. I think it looks good on other guys, but I'm like, I don't know. What about a cool handlebar mustache? Ooh, that'd be kind of cool, right?

Yeah. Ace of spades. Yeah, that'd be kind of sick. Yeah. I wonder what I'd look like with the gray hair and mustache.

Ethan Nestor
Wait, do you dye your beard also? No. Oh, I have. I have gray hairs growing into my eyebrow right now, and I have, like, a little gray patch coming in here or here. I see the little gray patch.

Seán McLoughlin
Oh, father time x. Fools of us all. Mm hmm. He's catching up to you. Shot.

Did you know in the UK, it's prohibited to be drunk while managing cattle? That's like the sheep thing. Why? I don't know how drunk. Don't drink it.

Moo. What's the legal limit for cattle? I don't know. For working with cattle, this law was. Put into place in order to prevent accidents from happening and keep people safe.

Ethan Nestor
I wonder if it's the same as drinking and driving. It's illegal to slide on icy streets. Oh. But that's fun. Yeah.

Do you think if someone gets. What. What would a dui be called with cows? Oh, a bui. Bovine under the influence.

Do you think that you have to blow before taking care of the cattle? He's like, 6.2. No, can't. Ah, shit. I can't.

Seán McLoughlin
6.2. Somebody's gonna point out now that that's like, you would be dead if you blew a six, you would be unbelievably dead. I don't know what breathalyzer limits are. What's. What's drunk.

Ethan Nestor
You don't know what the legal limit is? I don't have a license, so I've never had the. I've never known. I've never been breathed. I don't know if it's the same in the UK in the.

What do you think it is? I think it's, like, 0.8 or something like that. 0.08. So six point. Dude, you are alcohol at that point.

Wait, 6.2? Wouldn't that be the equivalent of your body, just, like, being a beer?

Seán McLoughlin
Um, where are we? Oh, yeah. Everything is point something. Mm hmm. If you are.

I don't know what weight I am in pounds. I think I'm, like, 145 or something. Or, like, 150. I can't remember, but this is confusing. .03.

What? Oh, this is how much you get. Number of drinks in 1 hour. Ten drinks. Get me to a point.

Ethan Nestor
28.28 is stinking drunk. Oh, boy. Dude, I would love to challenge someone to blow a six fucking dead in the morgue. What would you have to do a BC? I feel like the only way you could do that is if you put ethanol in your mouth and then just spit it into the machine.

A bac of 37 to 41 can cause alcohol poisoning and death. Not even reaching one. Not even reaching one. So what you're saying is that there's a chance. I guess there is a chance.

There is a chance. God. 6.2. Anyway, in the UK, if whales or sturgeons become beached, they need to be offered to the reigning monarch.

Seán McLoughlin
Oh, your majesty, this sturgeon has become beached. Herefore, we have brought it to you. We have brought it to you. Why would you like us to do it? All right, put it back.

Ethan Nestor
All right. Well, all right. Thanks. Thank you. This law dates back to 1322, when Edward II decreed that the head and spermaceti of a whale should be given to the king while the rest of the carcass belonged to the finder.

Seán McLoughlin
So this is another one of those laws. Since the 13 hundreds was like, this has never happened, so we don't care. Well, Sean, here's a question that I have. You know, I was like, we should read a couple of am I the assholes? And I think we only read one or two.

Should we ask, which shows that we're the assholes? Should we ask our. Our leaky friends to tweet us some, am I the assholes of their own? Yeah. Like, you had a fight with your friend over something.

Ethan Nestor
Mm hmm. Or you stole someone's child. Yeah. Anybody stealing children out there? Hopefully not, but you can tweet us.

Why don't you use the hashtag? Hashtag, am I the leaker? Yeah, that's good. Maybe, right? And then maybe next week, we'll.

We'll read some of those, tell you if you're an asshole or not. Spoiler alert. Yes, yes. Pointed out last time that instead of saying trigger warning, you were like, spoiler alert. Spoiler alert.

Seán McLoughlin
Spoiler warning.

You just started yelling, spoiler warning.

Ethan Nestor
I didn't see that comment. That's good. That's funny. Makes sense. Well, everyone, thank you for tuning in.

We'll see ya next week. Namaste. Namaste. Stay these nuts in your mouth.

Brain. Leaky.

Ethan Got Lit On Fire!

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2: Data Privacy Discussion

3: Reddit Deep Dive

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